


Could You Just Hold Me?

by lady emebalia (emebalia)



Series: Nick the Hooker [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Blood and Gore, Dubious Consent, Explicit Sexual Content, Homophobia, Mind Control, Multi, Original Character Death(s), Original Character(s), Rape/Non-con Elements, Sexual Violence, Sibling Incest, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-20
Updated: 2015-06-07
Packaged: 2018-03-31 10:44:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 50
Words: 100,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3975175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emebalia/pseuds/lady%20emebalia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Winchesters have shielded Nick from the supernatural as best as they could but that doesn't keep the supernatural away from him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Nick leaned at the wall and tried to look as unexcited as possible. Okay, he was excited every time he met Sam and Dean in person so that was nothing out of the ordinary. On the phone he spoke with one of them nearly every day by now, but with them almost constantly on the road Nick didn't see them as often as he would like.

However, this time Sam and Dean had insisted on this specific date and had asked him over a month ahead to hold this day free for them. At first Nick hadn't thought much about this because the time they spent together always meant awesome sex along with some quality time with all three of them just hanging out together but now, standing here, waiting to get picked up, he started to wonder. What was so specific about this date?

Maybe it was one of their birthdays or something, Nick mused and couldn't help but smile over the fact that he was in some kind of relationship with them and didn't know their birthdays. Or their last names for that matter. But they didn't know his either. They had started out as hooker and customer and with that kind of relationship you don't share personal stuff and when they had moved on from that, it never really came up. In what kind of relationship they were now Nick wasn't exactly sure but he was happy with the regular phone calls and the occasional visits.

The familiar rumble of Dean's car drew him out of his thoughts and Nick pushed himself from the wall he was leaning at and slipped in the back seat.

"Hey, man." Sam turned in the passenger seat and greeted him with a kiss. "Sorry we kept you waiting."

Nick leaned into the kiss, Sam's lips soft on his just a quick _hello_ , before he slumped down in his seat.

"Princess here couldn't get her hair ready." Dean pointed with his thumb at Sam while he greeted Nick with a wide grin. "You hungry? Found this nice little place, they make awesome steaks."

"Sounds good." And it did. The last two weeks or so hadn't been that great for Nick. He didn't have to go hungry but by now he was sick of Mac&Cheese. Just thinking of a steak made his mouth water.

While Dean steered the car through the light evening traffic Nick took stock of his boyfriends, as Aiden had dubbed them and Nick still needed to find a better term to clarify their relationship.

More often than not Sam and Dean showed up with various injuries, cuts and bruises, sometimes broken bones, and even though they never really talked about that, Nick liked to keep track of it. This time he didn't find any visible injuries for a change but he noticed that they both were dressed better than usual. Did they iron their shirts? Maybe this _was_ a birthday party. With him as some kind of gift.

They arrived at the restaurant and it turned out that Sam had reserved them a table. Following the waitress, her name tag read Nora, to a corner table at the other end of the room Nick noticed the dark wood decor and hunting trophies on the walls. Not exactly his style but it felt warm and comfortable and most important he didn't feel out of place. But Sam and Dean weren't the types for a noble restaurant themselves.

There were only a few other patrons and in their corner, Nick had the place next to the window with Dean walling him from the side and Sam sitting across from him, they had as much privacy as you can hope for in a public place like this.

Nick had a look at the menu and swallowed thickly. This place was out of his normal league and he couldn't help it and translated the price of the cheapest steak to the instant Mac&Cheese he had lived on for days now.

"Don't think about money." Dean whispered in his ear and he was close enough for Nick to feel his breath brushing over his earlobe. "Not today."

Nick shuddered in anticipation and when Nora came back he ordered the steak he had been eying.

The steak was as good as Dean had said it would be and Nick hadn't felt that full in a long time. Dean ordered pie and coffee for dessert.

"You want me to burst." Nick muttered to nobody in particular when the waitress set a large slice of pie in front of him.

"Just be a good boy and eat your pie." Sam said in a low voice and his eyes gleamed darkly from behind his bangs. That voice alone made Nick's blood rush to his groin and it didn't help his starting arousal when Sam's suddenly sock-clad foot nudged its way between his thighs.

"We're in public." Nick hissed but spread his legs to allow Sam better access. With his long legs Sam didn't even need to stretch to trail his big toe along Nick's hardening cock.

"Nobody is going to see." Dean's hand slipped under Nick's shirt, fingertips dipping under the waistband of Nick's jeans. "Just be quiet and eat your pie. You don't want to waste good pie."

With that Dean took his own fork in his free hand and had a small bite of his own pie.

"Sammy, we're definitely coming back here." Dean's moan was almost obscene while his fingertips traced Nick's hipbone before Dean slipped his whole hand in the back of Nick's jeans and cupped his ass cheek.

"You should start a list." Sam wiggled his toes along the length of Nick's now hard cock. "Last time I checked you had at least three places per state you want to come back eventually."

"That's what I have your geeky brain for." Dean's middle finger found the crack of his ass and Nick honestly tried to focus on his pie. They'd said he should eat so he would eat. And he totally didn't bite down on his fork to hide a moan.

"You want to come back here, you can keep track of it." Sam reminded Dean and wormed his way under Nick's balls, rolling them on the back of his toes. Big guys like Sam shouldn't be that nimble with their toes but Nick bit back a groan and stuffed more pie in his mouth. He wasn't even sure which flavor it was anymore.

Nick desperately hoped they would stop teasing as soon as he'd finished his pie and move this over to the privacy of a motel room. They wouldn't try do make him come in public, would they? Nick forced down another bite of pie when Dean's fingertip found his hole and Nick nearly choked on a piece of crust.

"Please." He whispered after he'd cleared his mouth but Dean was still gently tapping at his entrance.

"You still have half of your pie on the plate." Sam observed with a grin and a firm rub with the ball of his foot against Nick's cock. "No, Dean. Stop eying his pie. He has to finish it by himself."

Dean and Nick made disappointed sounds.

"He isn't even really eating." Dean whined and pressed his fingertip right at Nick's center. "It tastes the best when it's still warm and he's just butchering it."

"You can order yourself a second slice if you're still hungry." Sam shrugged and nipped at his coffee. "I saw blueberry on the menu."

Dean seemed to consider it but decided against it. Instead he leaned back in his seat which shifted his angle and made Nick jump but nobody was him paying any attention anyway. And they totally knew what that did to him. Bastards. At this rate he would come in his pants before he could finish the pie.

"For Christ's sake." Sam muttered and flagged down Nora. When she came over Nick froze, totally aware of Dean's hand still in his jeans. And Sam's foot in his crotch but at least she couldn't see that. He couldn't even tell Dean to stop with her standing right next to them and he could only hope that it looked like Dean was just hugging him or something.

"Could we get a slice of blueberry pie, please?" Sam asked with a warm smile at the waitress while Nick desperately tried to be somewhere else.

"Sure." She smiled back but her eyes flickered over to Dean and Nick. "Something to celebrate?"

"It's our anniversary." Dean said, his middle finger now resting in the crack of Nick's ass, and didn't bother to clarify that it was his anniversary with Sam and not with the man he had his hand down the pants. At least Nick now knew what was so special about this date.

By the time the waitress came back with the pie Nick was covered in sweat, cheeks flushed with arousal and he had a white knuckled grip on the edge of the table with one hand while the fork trembled in his other one. He was past hoping Sam and Dean wouldn't make him come in the restaurant, now he only hoped they wouldn't make him come in front of Nora the friendly waitress. She hadn't bat an eyelash at two men having their anniversary but he doubted she would be that open to him coming at her table.

Caught up in his own thoughts or better caught up in the feeling of the hand and the foot working his most private parts, Nick only noticed the sparkler sitting on top of a new slice of pie when he nearly fell face first into the sparks. Out of the corner of his eye he saw similar sparks in front of Dean.

"Emm, I only ordered one slice." Sam spoke up when Nora set a plate in front of him, too. That one without a sparkler.

"It's on the house." Nora smiled at Dean and Nick and Nick forced a smile on his lips. At least Sam and Dean seemed be stunned themselves and had stopped moving completely. "Happy anniversary."

Dean and Sam shared an amused look, Sam's mouth twitching from hold back laughter, and beside Nick Dean shrugged.

"Dude, free pie." And with that Dean dug in. His enthusiasm translated to his other hand and like always Sam had no problem matching his partners activities and within a minute Nick creamed his pants.

Nick tasted blood because he would rather bite his lip off than to scream out his orgasm in a fucking restaurant and he slumped down exhausted but insanely high on the feeling that they got a way with this.

"You gonna eat this?" Dean asked and without looking Nick shoved his untouched second slice over to him. In the end Dean ate most of the pie and he patted his belly with a stupid grin on his face after he'd cleared the last plate.

"I'm not sure I can move, Sammy." Dean let out a half breath, half belch and stretched a bit to give his stomach more room.

"I'm sure Nick here can reanimate you." Sam leaned in and added in a low voice: "And you don't even have to do anything. You can just lie on the bed with those lips wrapped around your cock, how does that sound?"

"Why are we still here and not at the motel already?" Dean asked and was about to roll himself out of the seat but Sam hold him back with a meaningful tilt of his head in Nick's direction.

"Oh, yeah. Right." Dean fell back in his seat. "We have something for you. You know, because of today."

Nick's stomach dipped. He'd thought they were past this. He clearly remembered that one morning when Dean had tried to pay him and Nick had refused to take it.

"Do you really feel like you should pay me?" Nick had asked looking from one to the other. "Because I don't feel like you should pay me anymore."

Sam and Dean had shared one of those looks and then Dean had pocketed the money and it never came up again. Until now. Did Nick really miss the _Yeah, free sex!_ in their expressions back then? Was he really that naive?

Sam produced a white little box from somewhere and placed it in front of Nick.

It hurt. They had their anniversary and they spent it with a good meal and their favorite fuck toy and that was okay. But this _It's our special day so let's pay him and don't cheat him out of free sex for a change_? It hurt.

Eyes brimming Nick looked up from the offending white box to meet Sam's eyes.

"I thought we were past the paying state." He said and felt dumb. How could he have been that stupid?


	2. Chapter 2

"We … what?" Sam looked at Nick in total confusion before his gaze shifted to Dean for an explanation.

"Dude, we're not paying you." Dean even managed to sound offended. "It's a gift. You know, for our anniversary."

Nick stared at the little white box in the middle of the table. Come still sticky in his pants, now cold and itching, and he just wanted to go home and take a shower. He would stomp out of this place if Dean wasn't sitting next to him, trapping him in his seat.

"Your anniversary." Nick said numbly. "And to celebrate that you give your little fuck toy a little treat."

"What?" Sam repeated.

"It's _our_ anniversary." Dean made a helpless gesture between the three of them. "Today a year ago I picked you up for the first time."

Slowly Nick turned his head and blinked at him. And then, finally, it began to dawn to him what Dean was trying to tell him. Did they really …?

"Hey." Sam reached out and took his hand. "We love you and without you we wouldn't be complete."

"Really, Sam? Could you be more gay?" Dean said which ghosted a smile on Nick's lips. Then Dean slung his arm around Nick's shoulders. "But he's right. We're like the damn Musketeers."

"I feel stupid now." Nick mumbled but leaned into Dean and hold tight on to Sam's hand.

"How about you just open it?" Sam suggested and shoved the box closer to him.

Inside the box on white tissue lay a bracelet, dark almost black leather in stark contrast to the white around it.

"That's …" Lost for words Nick carefully picked it up. "You shouldn't have …"

The leather was soft to the touch but not like any leather Nick had seen before. Nearly two inches wide with a silver buckle and studded with rivets out of another metal, iron maybe. The same symbol Sam and Dean had tattooed on their chests, a pentagram surrounded by flames, was burned into the center and next to that were other symbols Nick couldn't place. This wasn't something you buy in a shop, this was custom-made. Made for him. Nick swallowed against the lump in his throat.

"Look at the inner side." Sam prompted and Nick turned it around.

Their names, _Nick_ in the middle with _Sam_ and _Dean_ flanking it, also burned into the leather and more symbols and smaller words in what could be Latin framing them.

"I don't know what to say." Once again Nick blinked against the tears but now for a completely different reason.

"I'd like to see you wearing this." Dean's lips brushed Nick's cheek. "Wearing only this."

"As long as you don't want to draw me." Nick joked and the tension left the table. He held out his right arm so that Sam could buckle the bracelet. "Thank you. It's beautiful."

"These symbols are for protection." Sam traced the pentagram with the pad of his thumb. He tried to not stress it but even without knowing that this symbol was important enough for them to tattoo it to their chests Nick would have noticed how much Sam wanted him to wear it. Always.

"I won't take it off ever again." Nick promised and meant it.

"Okay, how about we blow this Popsicle stand and move over to our room?" Dean suggested. "We have something to celebrate."

"And to make up to you." Sam added and squeezed Nick's hand before he let go.

Nora brought the check and her eyes went soft when she noticed the open box on the table and the bracelet around Nick's wrist he couldn't stop touching.

She wished them a good evening and Sam left her a generous tip.

They drove in silence to the motel that had become theirs, not the one they had stayed at the first time Dean had picked him up, this one was closer to Nick's place or better to the place where he usually waited for them to pick him up. Strange, it was their first anniversary and they still didn't know where he lived. There was so much they didn't know about each other and it should bother Nick more than it actually did, he knew that but if he was honest, he didn't really care.

"We can just hang out, if you're not up to …" Dean started when they entered the room but was interrupted by Nick slinging his arms around Dean's neck and kissing him. He slipped his tongue in Dean's mouth and explored it for a second before Dean took control and claimed Nick's mouth instead.

"Thought you wanted to see me in nothing but the bracelet." Nick reminded him and shamelessly rubbed his already half-hard cock against Dean's thigh. "Shouldn't you start undressing me then?"

"Hear that, Sammy?" Dean's gaze went over Nick's shoulder where Nick could sense the other man standing close behind him. Not touching or anything, just being there, close, looming over Nick.

"Still so bossy." Sam sneaked his arms around the two of them and caught Nick's wrists crossed behind Dean's neck with one hand and added just enough pressure for the rivets to press into the soft skin on the inner side of Nick's left wrist.

"Somebody needs to be put in his place." Sam growled in Nick's ear, his mouth open and wet on his neck. Nick shuddered.

"What happened to let's make it up to him?" He asked anyway and Sam just tightened his grip around his wrists and now the rivets really bit into his skin.

"He's talking too much." Sam observed and finally pressed his firm body against Nick's back.

"Where did you put the gag?" Dean placed a quick kiss on the corner of Nick's mouth and then brushed his thumb over the slightly parted lips. Nick closed his eyes and leaned into Sam behind him while Dean slipped the pad of his thumb in to trace the soft inside of the bottom lip.

Sam let go of his wrists and bit sharply into the meat of Nick's neck making him yelp before he disappeared completely from behind him. Dean made up for that loss with his strong hand between Nick's shoulder blades, holding him steady while his thumb slipped farther into Nick's mouth, resting on his tongue now. Nick sealed his lips around the digit and sucked it in even deeper. With wide eyes Dean stared at his mouth and Nick couldn't help but smile around the thumb because he knew how addicted Dean was to his mouth.

Then Sam was back and the tone changed. With one hand at his chin and the other one on his forehead Dean forced Nick's mouth open and from behind Sam slipped the ball gag between his teeth. Nick struggled in their grip but had no chance against their combined force. Not that he was trying that hard.

"There, much better." Sam closed the buckle and Dean brushed one last time over Nick's lips now stretched around the ball while saliva was already pooling in Nick's mouth.

Hands slipped under his shirt and found their way to his fly, however, they took their time to get him out of his clothes.

When he was naked except for the bracelet and the gag they stretched him out on the bed. Still fully clothed Sam and Dean stood over him, admiring the view.

Nick lay very still and just breathed around the gag but when they just kept staring he bucked his hips in a silent begging to do something about his erected cock leaking all over his stomach.

"Somebody is impatient." Sam shook his head and then caught Dean in a passionate kiss. They took their time as well, slowly peeling each other out of their clothes before they, finally, joined Nick on the bed. By then he had his hands in rigid fists at his sides to keep himself from touching his aching cock but Sam gently uncurled his fingers and guided his hands to the headboard.

"Don't let go." Sam ordered and peppered his chest with little bites while Dean slipped a lube-cold finger between Nick's ass-cheeks.

Nick never needed much preparation and a minute later they had him in one of their favorite positions, _Nick the Fuck Toy #1_ as Nick had dubbed it, with Sam riding him in reverse and Dean fucking him.

"Don't come first." Sam ordered while he slipped a condom over Nick's cock. Nick nodded and satisfied with that Sam turned around and slowly sank down on Nick. Hot and tight, Sam felt perfect around Nick. Then the blunt tip of Dean's cock nudged at his entrance and forced its way in, stretching him, filling him. Nick grabbed the headboard harder and focused on breathing.

They found their rhythm with ease, _in_ and _down_ in perfect synch leaving Nick in a white knuckled grip at the headboard and biting down on the gag in his mouth to keep himself from coming. From his position Nick could only see Sam's broad back and Dean's hands kneading his ass while Dean used Nick's body as a toy to fuck Sam. Lost in their own world they had completely forgotten about Nick, playing his biggest kink.

With Dean spreading him wide, hitting his prostate with every thrust and Sam's heat tight around his cock, Nick was close to the edge in no time. He breathed harshly around the gag and desperately tried to hold back.

They had ordered him to not come first and they would tan his hide if he disobeyed and today he wasn't in the mood for a good spanking. But if he managed to hold back it would get him the good boy treatment.

Nick lost track of time but finally their movements became more frantic. Dean pounded into him hard and deep and then Sam clenched tight around Nick and screamed out Dean's name. Dean followed him after a few more hard thrusts, cock pulsing deep inside of Nick. For a moment they just leaned against each other in the afterglow, Sam's head lolling in the crook of Dean's neck. Then Dean slipped out of Nick and Sam rolled to the side before they stretched out next to Nick.

"You didn't come." Sam noticed and traced a finger over Nick's heaving chest, circling his nipple, while Dean unbuckled the gag. "Good boy."

Nick licked his dry lips and Dean helped him to wet them with an open mouthed kiss.

"Please." He keened into Dean's mouth, hands still in a vice-like grip at the headboard. "Please let me come. Please."

His hips bucked uncontrolled and tears of relief fell from his eyes when Sam got rid of the condom and wrapped his hand around Nick's cock. Sam pressed his thumb right under the head and Nick jolted under him.

"Come." Dean ordered and mouthed his throat when Nick threw his head back and came in thick ropes over Sam's hand. Sam worked him through the jerks of his orgasm up to the point where Nick whimpered in growing discomfort.

"Beautiful." Dean breathed against the soft skin under Nick's chin.

Sam brought his hand up for Nick to see, messy with his come, and then smeared it over Nick's lips. Tasting himself Nick licked his lips clean and then cleaned Sam's fingers one by one.

"Good boy." Sam praised cupping Nick's face and leaned in for a kiss.

Stroking and kissing him Sam and Dean helped him to calm down and after a quick clean up Dean threw a blanket over all three of them.

After his second orgasm this evening Nick lay boneless but happy in the pillow and fell asleep seconds later with Sam and Dean at his sides and their hands resting on his chest.


	3. Chapter 3

_Just like their old man,_ Bobby thought and adjusted his cap. _Letting me down without as much as an explanation._

He knew it wasn't fair to compare Sam and Dean with their father because John had been a selfish son of a bitch and his sons were quite the opposite but still. They were less than three hours away and Bobby had finally narrowed the hunting ground of the succubus he was after down to two bars and Dean would be perfect bait and he was willing to play bait, no question about that, but not today. Because today the Winchesters had something more important to do. Something they didn't care to elaborate to Bobby. He loved them like his own sons but sometimes, sometimes he wanted to get that shotgun he'd kept handy for their dad.

  
One man and two bars to keep an eye on, it didn't take a genius to figure out that Bobby had a busy night ahead. At least the Winchesters had promised to join him tomorrow.

The first bar turned out to be a bust and Bobby could only hope he wasn't too late to save some random guy's ass when he reached the second one. He parked a little at the side in the shadows because if he was right and if he somehow managed to get the succubus outside without too much trouble, he didn't want anybody to notice him stuffing a woman in his trunk.

Yeah, easy as pie, as Dean would say and not for the first time Bobby really wished the Winchesters were with him on this one. The succubus would eagerly follow Dean outside. Or Dean would follow her like a lewd moron. Either way they would get her outside and out of sight for a clean kill.

Bobby breathed out a "Balls." and entered the building. On his way to the bar he had a quick look around. It was the middle of the week and there was only a small number of patrons inside and none of the women stood out as the possible succubus. Bobby didn't know what she looked like because that depended on the man she was after but the women he spotted around here were either more interested in other things than seducing men or in a larger group. The succubus would be alone or with a man and for sure she would draw attention.

Grumbling into his beard Bobby took a stool at the bar and ordered a beer. The barkeeper was a possible candidate, young and pretty, but after Bobby had observed her for a few minutes it became clear that she knew her way around this bar, even grabbed a bottle without looking. This wasn't her first week working here and Bobby had looked at fresh succubus leftovers three towns over just a few days ago.

When the door opened Bobby had a hopeful glance at the newcomer but it was a couple and the succubus wouldn't come _in_ with her prey.

"Waiting for someone?" The barkeeper ask. She seemed to have a moment and was willing to talk so Bobby took the chance.

"Hoped to find my daughter here." He started the story he'd used for a while now. So far it had worked pretty well. He sighed. "We had an argument and she stomped out."

He took a sip of his beer to let the story sink in.

"Now she wants to show me." He continued when he was sure he had her full attention. "Picking up men in bars. Young guys with a bad boy image and a lot of stamina, if you get my drift." He knew that he had just described Dean in the worst possible way but he was still a bit angry at the boy for letting him down.

"I take she's a grown woman, she can go home with whomever she wants." The barkeeper commented in a brisk tone and wiped the counter in harsh movements. Bobby bit his tongue and chose his next words carefully.

"It was a stupid argument." He continued. "You know how it goes, one stupid thing leads to the next and then you yell at each other and slam doors and then you don't talk to each other for years. I just want to see her. Tell her that I love her."

Her hand stilled mid-wipe.

"What does she look like?" She asked after a long second.

"Hell if I know. She is a brunette by nature but today? Who knows?" Bobby took another sip. "You would notice her. She would come in clearly looking for attention and she knows how to get that from a man. And she wouldn't leave alone."

She thought about that for a moment, clearly struggling if she should tell him or not. That she had something to tell was written all over her face.

"Have you seen her?" Bobby pushed, adding just that little bit of hope to his tone.

"There was this woman." She nodded. "Left with Ethan about half an hour ago. Ethan Coldwen."

"Do you know where I can find this Ethan?"

Half a minute later Bobby was back at his car. Succubi liked to draw out their meal, having sex with their victims for hours, slowly draining their energy. If a succubus hold back she could even live off one man for weeks but Bobby doubted this one was out for more than a one night stand. As far as he could tell from the victims he'd seen this one liked it fast and dirty.

It was just a ten minutes drive to the address the barkeeper had given him but it seemed longer. It took him another minute to find the right number in the apartment complex but when he pressed his ear against the thin door on the third floor he heard unmistakable noises from the inside.

Hoping that this was the right apartment and that he wasn't about to disturb an innocent couple, Bobby tried the knob and when he found it locked, he made short work of it with his lock picks. Clicking the safety of his gun off he sneaked in and followed the noises to the bedroom.

Poking his head in, Bobby found them in the middle of the act, tightly entwined with her sitting in his lap, clawing at his back. Literally clawing, the man was covered in blood but he didn't seem to notice. The smell of blood and sweat and sex was heavy in the air. Ethan had his head thrown back, eyes closed and a constant stream of primeval grunts coming from deep out of his throat. He seemed close to the climax.

There was a soft light where their bodies were connected and the succubus' eyes glowed bright green behind her half-closed eyelids. She was in the midst of draining him and his building orgasm would probably be the death of him.

The man's back shielded the succubus from Bobby, shooting her from this angle would be tricky without hitting the man first, and looking over his shoulder she would notice him as soon as he entered the room.

"Hey, bitch." Bobby did the only thing he could do and stormed in, hoping to circle the bed and shoot her before she even realized what was happening.

She was quick. Bobby wasn't even half-way around the bed when she screamed and threw the man at Bobby. Arms full with the naked and bloody man, who flailed and screamed in surprise, Boby's shots went wide. Stark naked, only covered in the blood of her victim, the succubus headed for the window and jumped. Glass shattered and she yelled in pain and then she was gone.

"Balls!" Bobby leaned out of the broken window and saw her three stories down. Only illuminated by the light from the surrounding apartments the courtyard lay mostly dark and she was only a pale figure in the shadows. Bobby sent three bullets after her but she was already on the run. One shot was followed by a wailing scream, though, but that didn't slow her down. Seconds later she was around a corner.

Bobby wanted to chase her, put her down once and for all, but by the time he would even reach the ground level she would be gone and a soft moan behind him reminded him that the man was still alive and needed help.

"Please, help me." The man shifted on the floor and tried to reach for Bobby.

"It's going to be alright, Ethan." Bobby knelt beside him and kept his eyes above the man's waist. He lay curled on his side because of the deep lashes in his back and the new claw-marks in his chest from when she had grabbed him. The marks were deep but not life-threatening, however, that wasn't the man's biggest problem.

Bobby dragged the blanket from the bed and covered the lower half of the man's body up and then he reached for the phone that lay on the nightstand.

"I'm calling 911." He informed Ethan. "They'll be here in a minute."

He dealt the number and told the operator the address and then placed the phone on the floor next to Ethan. Faintly he heard the operator telling him to stay on the line but Bobby couldn't stay.

Somebody must have heard the shots so the police probably was on the way too and Bobby had to be gone when they arrived.

"You're going to be alright." He reassured Ethan once again and hoped he was right with that. The succubus had drained quite some energy from him and he was injured, not the best condition to face a withdrawal from succubus venom.

Gathering the clothes and more important the purse the succubus had left behind, Bobby hurried back to his car.

Ambulance and police arrived at the same time. Hidden in the dark of his car Bobby stayed long enough to watch Ethan being wheeled out on a stretcher. The man was alive and that counted as a win but Bobby couldn't help but think that with the help of the Winchesters this could have been prevented. That bitch could be dead by now.

Muttering under his breath about damn Winchesters Bobby drove away from the apartment complex before one of the officers could decide to have a look at him. Out of sight he stopped the car and turned on the light to investigate the things the succubus had left behind. Nothing in the pockets of her clothes and when he emptied the purse Bobby found all the things women kept in there, lipsticks and other make-up stuff, tissues and candy wrappers, crumbled business cards with various names on them. One he even knew, he'd seen Richard Dawsen's corpse just the other day. But nothing personal. No address, no phone, nada.

The next few hours Bobby drove around the area in the faint hope to spot her or to find something, anything, but she was just gone.

So he returned to his motel room to get some shuteye, maybe he had more luck in the morning. Already ready for bed he had his phone in hand and pondered if he should call Dean or not. The succubus was wounded and now knew that there was a hunter after her, he doubted she would stay in town much longer.

"Hope you have fun whatever you're doing right now." Bobby tossed the phone aside and slipped under the covers. He would kick Dean's ass if he found out that he was entertaining himself with some random woman while Bobby needed his help. However, Sam was mixed up in this mysterious thing too, so probably not a random woman. But it still bugged him that they hadn't just told him what kept them busy.

Bobby turned to his side and let out a deep breath. First thing in the morning he had to find out if there had been any strange incidences involving a naked woman running around town covered in blood with a gun shot wound in her leg. Yeah, that sounded like fun.


	4. Chapter 4

Indifferent. Ishtar sat at the bar, stirred her cocktail with the straw and was indifferent. Letting pheromones flood the room, feeling the attention of some men sparking.

_Pheromones_ , Ishtar huffed into her drink. Another piece of magic modern science had taken away. Back in the day it had been her grace, her beauty that had made men fall to their knees begging for her attention. Today it was reduced to a chemical reaction.

  
Ishtar finished her drink and the barkeeper, a young woman barely old enough to drink herself, took the glass away without asking if she wanted another one. Ishtar commented it with a tight smile and rearranged her full hair with a big gesture, sending a new wave of pheromones through the room. The barkeeper couldn't know what was happening but for sure she sensed the predator in front of her.

"May I buy you a drink?" A warm voice asked and Ishtar shifted her attention from the barkeeper to the man now sitting on the stool next to her.

His appearance was way more promising than his pickup line and Ishtar took a deep breath. She only smelled him, young and strong, nothing sick or, more common these days, toxic from drug use or medication.

"Why not?" She gave him a warm smile and zoomed in on him. Subtle shifts of bone and structure and indifferent changed to specific, random pretty woman turned into woman of his dreams.

"I'm Ethan, by the way." He introduced himself as if she cared about his name.

"Ishtar." She returned the gesture and when he turned on his stool, facing her with his legs falling open, she openly sized him up, gaze lingering on his groin for a long second. "Nice to meet you, Ethan."

She licked her lips in anticipation.

The drinks came and he said _Cheers_ and they chatted for a while. Ishtar actually liked this part. Luring her prey into her trap, seducing him with all the little things, making him hers even without the venom which always felt like cheating. It was great to seal the deal, to prevent him from changing his mind and running away when he realized that he'd stumbled into her trap, that he was about to die. With the venom they didn't care if they died as long as they died in her arms.

Right now it was all about seducing him the old-fashioned way. An accidental brush of their hands here, an upward glance there. She didn't pay much attention to what he was saying just made sure to nod and say _yes_ or _hmm_ at the right places. They had another drink and one after that and he was close now, she felt the heat radiating from him and smelled his sweat and his raising arousal.

His hand landed on her knee and then he leaned in and kissed her. The venom in her saliva worked quick, marking him as hers.

Pupils blown wide he studied her face for a second before he stole another kiss, dosing himself farther with the poison. His tongue sneaked into her mouth and she welcomed it, played with it.

"I love you." He whispered before he dove back in, already addicted to her sweet poison.

"I know." Ishtar smiled. "Let's go somewhere more private."

They finished their drinks and he eagerly followed her outside, his arousal a heavy cloud around him. Tonight Ishtar would feast.

Ishtar never took her prey home with her but Ethan didn't live far away and he even managed to drive them to his place without crashing despite the fact that his eyes were more on her than the street.

Ethan nearly kicked in his own door when he couldn't get the key working with the first try but Ishtar took the time to lock behind them because the last thing she wanted was for somebody to disturb them.

His hands slipped under her shirt, cupping her breasts, and his mouth was on her throat and neck, leaving a wet trail of sloppy kisses.

"Too many clothes." He mumbled into her skin and struggled to get her out of the shirt. "Please, need you."

He started humping her hip in the desperate attempt to get some friction and even through both their jeans she felt the hard line of his cock. Oh yeah, this was going to be fun.

"Bed. Now." She told him and he literally dragged her to the bedroom. His hands never left her, roaming under her shirt, shoving her bra up to gain free access to her breasts and then he sucked at her nipple through the cotton of her shirt. She threw her head back, presenting her chest to his mouth and with a little jump she slung her legs around him, ankles crossed just above his sweet ass and let him carry her the rest of the way.

They landed on the bed in a tumble of limbs. Somehow he managed to get them both out of their shirts and then his hands and mouth were back on her chest. With his tongue he circled one nipple, hot and wet, while he kneaded her flesh with both hands.

"Eat me out." She ordered and shoved him farther down. He was good with this tongue, she had to give him that. Ishtar came with her back bowed and his face buried in the hot wetness between her legs.

"Please." He whimpered. Lapping at her entrance he begged for permission while he worked his cock in frantic movements. "Please, I need … I need …"

"Fuck me." She spread her legs wider.

"Thank you." He cried in relief when he thrust into her. "Thank you."

His mouth found hers and she felt her own wetness still on his face mixed with tears and tasted herself in the kiss.

Pounding into her like a horny Neanderthal, raw need without finesse, it didn't take long for him to come. He screamed out his orgasm with the cords on his neck standing out and his face an animalistic mask.

Ishtar felt his come spurting deep in her body and with that she sucked the first load of his life force right out of him. Feeling the energy of his orgasm ripping through her she followed him a second later, clenching around him to milk every last drop out of him.

He collapsed on top of her but was still buried deep between her legs. Breathless they lay like that for a moment.

"That was fun." She held his head up with both hand and kissed him rough and demanding. "I want more."

"More?" His voice was hoarse and he licked his lips and with that more of her venom found its way into his system. "I'm not sure if I can."

"Don't worry about that, darling." She brushed a sweaty strand of hair out of his face. "You can and if it's the last thing you do." She chuckled softly and urged him in a sitting position. "To be honest, it is going to be the last thing you do."

"Please." His cock was hard again, standing proud out of the curl of dark hair, and it almost looked painful already. "I need it, please."

"I'll give you what you need." She whispered in his ear and set down in his lap, impaling herself on his shaft. Now, after she'd taken the edge off, she wanted to draw this one out, drain him slowly drop by drop.

She rotated her hips and he cried out almost on the brink again just from being inside her.

"Shh, not too fast." Not holding back anymore she let her claws out. The pain would help him to last longer. "We have all night."

She was so lost in the feeling of him inside her, his hands on her and his energy sparkling along every nerve, every fiber of her being that she almost didn't notice the threat before it was too late.

"Hey, bitch!" A man screamed and stormed in, gun trained at her. He tried to circle the bed, probably afraid to harm the precious human, and that gave her the extra second to survive his attack.

Ramming her claws in Ethan's chest she threw him at the hunter and then she threw herself at the only other exit of the room. She shielded her face with her arms but pieces of glass cut her arms and legs and then she fell.

The impact on the concrete three stories down knocked the wind out of her and for a long second she just lay there unable to move. Above her a figure appeared in the window and gunfire echoed through the night.

Ishtar scrambled to her feet but a bullet bit in her leg and she fell hard to her knees. She screamed out the agonizing pain, _silver that bastard has silver bullets_ , but she came to her feet and she ran.

Run or die. With a hunter on her ass she knew running was her only option so she ran. Her leg buckled under her but she gritted her teeth and moved.

She made her way around so many corners and over so many courtyards that in the end she didn't even knew where she was anymore. But way too soon running became walking and walking became hobbling and then she just collapsed in a little niche between two buildings.

She listened into the night but beyond her own harsh breathing and her blood rushing in her ears she heard nothing.

Ishtar leaned back and rested her head against the wall behind her and laughed. The wall was rough on her skin and the concrete she was sitting on butt naked felt cold in places that never should feel cold and her leg spasmed in pain but she laughed.

She had dodged the bullet, quite literally, and she had survived a hunter. Again. And compared to the damage the other one had done, this was nothing. Once she got the bullet out of her leg, it would heal with only leaving a small scar and then she could forget this episode.

Exhausted like she was she had lost focus on her disguise along the way and when she buried her face in her hands she felt the welts of the scars. With trembling fingers she traced the ugly lines of her deformed face and thought of the hunter who did this to her. Who had butchered her face and had left her for dead. Back than she had wished he had finished it, had killed her like he intended to but now that memory was the cold fire that kept her going. She had survived that, she could survive this.

Wounded like she was at the moment she couldn't shift to disguise herself so that was the first step, gathering enough strength to look pretty again.

Ignoring the pain and the cold and the stone wall biting into her skin Ishtar closed her eyes and focused on breathing. In and out, one breath after the other.

After a minute she was calm enough to focus on her face. She had fed from Ethan and that helped her now. When she reached for her face again, she only felt smooth skin under her fingertips and a smile spread over her perfect lips.

Carefully, minding her injured leg, Ishtar stood up and tried to put weight on it. She bit back a cry of pain but she could stand and slowly she managed to make her way over the yard towards the street she could hear just around the corner.

She needed to get the bullet out, find something to wear and get out of town. Not necessarily in that order and a shower would be awesome, too. While she hobbled down a short ally she pondered if she could risk going back to her place. She had everything she needed there but did the hunter know about that place? Would he wait there for her?

_Too risky,_ she decided. There wasn't anything she couldn't replace easily anyway. No need to take that risk.

At the mouth of the ally Ishtar saw the light from the street lamps and cars rushing by.

_Almost_ , she reassured herself. _Almost there._ She just needed to find a man. Everything else she could work out from there.


	5. Chapter 5

"Hey, Nicky." Dean called him and gently shook his shoulder. Rolling away from him Nick tried to hold on to sleep and snuggled deeper into the pillow. It was way too early to wake up, he was sure of that.

"Nick." The mattress dipped next to him and then Dean leaned over him and started nibbling at his earlobe. "Nicky, wake up."

"Five minutes?" Nick mumbled and half-heartedly tried to swat Dean away like he was an annoying fly. Dean licked along the outline of his earlobe instead.

"Sorry, man." Sam's deep voice suddenly came from his other side and a heavy hand landed on Nick's ass. The covers softened the blow but now Nick jolted awake and his cock was already way more interested than the rest of him.

"What the hell?" He muttered and turning to his back Nick looked from one to the other. Sam and Dean were already fully dressed and Nick's hope they would continue where they had left off the other day died when he saw the expression on their faces.

"What's the hurry?" Rubbing sleep from his eyes he sat up. Usually they slept in on days like this. Sometimes they lay in bed for hours just enjoying the closeness or having lazy morning sex. Sam and Dean always made sure they actually had time for him when they were in town.

"Sorry, but we have to get on the road." Dean sighed and squeezed Nick's neck. "Hit the shower and then I'll drop you off in town."

"We'll have more time next time." Sam promised. "Like a whole weekend or something. Just us and maybe a roll of rope."

"Hmm, tempting." Nick gave him a kiss and worked his way out from under the covers.

Knowing they were in a hurry he made it a quick shower. Half-way through he heard a phone ringing and Sam's muffled voice but the water made it impossible to understand any words. However, when he turned the water off and started towelling off, he could hear Sam and Dean talking through the thin door loud and clear.

"He awaits us at eleven." Sam said. "And he sounded pissed."

"Told him we had something important to do yesterday." Dean countered and Nick's chest swelled because he was the important thing they had to do yesterday. And they did him quite well, thank you very much.

"Besides I'm not really looking forward to playing bait for that bitch." Dean continued and judging by the way his voice came and went he was pacing the room. "Last time hadn't been fun at all."

"Last time?" Not only Nick pricked his ears at Dean's last comment. Holding his breath Nick waited for Dean's answer.

"You were in college, okay?" Dean tried to deflect the question. "No big deal."

"But dad had your back." Now Sam sounded really worried and Nick could picture his eyes going all big and wide with compassion. However, Nick also got something else out of Sam's words. Dean and Sam's dad worked together?

"Right, Dean?" Sam nearly begged so probably Sam's dad wasn't that fond of Sam's choice in boyfriend, Nick guessed. He was missing a lot of background here, he knew that, but Nick had his experience with homophobic fathers.

Dean didn't answer and Nick heard some rummaging instead and then a zipper being closed with force.

"Dean?"

"It was a solo gig, alright?" He finally answered, probably louder than he'd intended. "What do you wanna hear, Sammy? Bitch jumped me but I got her. End of story."

"Did she …?" Sam started to ask but broke off maybe realizing that Nick could hear every word and not for the first time Nick wondered what they actually did for a living. He knew it was dangerous but this sounded … he wasn't sure what this sounded like. Not like something good, that was for sure. And he didn't want to think too closely about that.

"Dean, did she?" Sam insisted.

"Wasn't that bad." Dean finally answered in a tone that highly recommended to Sam to drop it.

"Oh, Dean." All of a sudden Sam sounded broken.

Okay, whatever it was that she had done to Dean, it was bad, that much Nick figured out on his own. He tried to make sense out of the rest while he hurried to get dressed. When he came out of the bathroom he was still at a loss and it didn't get better when he found Sam and Dean standing in the middle of the room with Sam crushing Dean in a bear hug.

When he noticed Nick, Dean tried to jump out of Sam's arms but Sam hold him tight and after a second in which Dean looked absolutely scared, he relaxed and let Sam hold him.

Nick couldn't say how proud it made him that Dean could show this side of his in front of him and without a word Nick stepped closer and they opened their embrace to let him in.

For a long second they just stood there, heads bowed with their foreheads touching and arms firmly around each other's shoulders. Sam was rock solid but under his hand on Dean's shoulder-blade Nick felt light tremors running through Dean's body.

Nick started to rub soothing circles on Dean's back and from the other side Sam did the same. Tremors became shakes and a helpless little sob escaped Dean's lips.

They guided Dean over to the bed where he just slumped down on the edge. Sam crawled in behind him so he could hold Dean and let him lean his head against his shoulder while Nick knelt between Dean's legs and slung his arms around both of them and rested his head on Dean's chest. Under his ear he heard Dean's heartbeat, fast and strong.

"Shh." Sam made. "It's okay. We got you."

"This is stupid." Dean tried to laugh it off but didn't try to get out of their combined hug. "Bobby's going to kill us if we're late."

"He can wait five more minutes." Sam said and tightened his grip around him. He rested his chin on Dean's shoulder and showed no intention to move any time soon.

Nick didn't know what had riled Dean up in the first place but he knew two things. One, that Dean wasn't the caring and sharing type and that he would try to act as if everything was fine but it would eat at him nevertheless and two, how to get his mind on other things.

Okay, it wasn't the best coping mechanism, Nick knew that, but in Dean's case it was the best way of action. So he sat back a little and started stroking Dean's sides, from the ribcage down to his hipbone, along the outside of his thighs and back again.

"Ehm, Nick?" Dean asked but Nick silenced him with a kiss. On his next stroke over Dean's body Nick chose the path along the inner side of his thighs and then cupped him through his jeans. With the heel of his hand he worked the bulge under the fabric.

When Nick looked up he found Sam and Dean both staring down at him, expressions unreadable but Dean spread his legs a little bit wider. Just enough to encourage Nick to keep going.

However, when he reached for the fly Dean caught his hand.

"I'd love to." Dean's voice was raspy, if from the memories or what he was doing to him Nick couldn't tell. "But we don't have the time."

Now Nick quirked an eyebrow at him. "My mouth on your cock? You're done in less than a minute."

That chased away the dark shadows and Dean grinned at him. "Bring it on."

Eagerly Nick went to work and freed Dean's already stiffening cock and then he dove in. Nick took him deep but the second he tasted Dean on his tongue, he realized what was different this time. The way Dean tried to draw back he'd noticed it, too.

For everything more than handjobs that involved Nick, they had used condoms. Always.

Nick switched to his hand, working Dean in long, even strokes while he looked up and meeting their eyes.

"I'm clean." Nick said, fully aware that that wasn't the point in this situation.

"We too." They said in unison.

"Good." And with that Nick sealed his lips around the head of Dean's cock and dipped his tongue in the slit. Above him Dean moaned and his hands found Nick's head, not guiding or forcing, not this time, just resting there, fingers massaging his scalp.

It took longer than a minute but all too soon Nick had Dean reduced to a bubbling mess with his head lolling on Sam's shoulder. One hand still entangled in Nick's hair Dean blindly reached for Sam who was mouthing his neck.

"I'm gonna …" Dean tried to warn Nick between harsh breaths but Nick just sealed his lips around him and hollowed his cheeks and then the first spurt of come hit the back of his throat. Bitter and musky and Nick had to fight against the gag reflex but he swallowed it. Bobbing up and down Dean's length Nick worked him through his orgasm.

With a last slurp Nick let go of the spent dick and rested his head on Dean's knee with a happy sigh. He felt the tightness in his own pants but this was about Dean.

"Did you just …?" Sam asked in wonder while he hold on to a boneless Dean in his arms.

"Didn't want him to make a mess out of himself." Nick shrugged and wiped the mixture of spit and come from his face. "I better wash up."

He scrambled to his feet and retreated to the bathroom where he stared in disbelief at his own reflection in the mirror. He had just swallowed Dean down, had tasted him for real for the first time.

When he returned to the main room Dean had come around and stood now in the middle of the room looking embarrassed.

"Nick, I …" He started but trailed of, throwing a helpless glance at Sam. Nick got it. Whatever had happened to Dean, it was related to his job and that was a topic they didn't touch. Nick hoped they would trust him enough to tell him some day, and yesterday had given him hope that that day wasn't far, but for sure he didn't want for Dean to feel like he had to tell Nick. Not before he was ready to share that part of his life. Same for Sam, who too looked torn.

So Nick closed the distance between them and brought their lips together before Dean could say anything else.

"It's okay." He cupped Dean's neck and rested his forehead against Dean's. "You don't need to tell me. Not now, not like this."

The way Dean just stared at him broke his heart. Like Dean hadn't expected him to be understanding, to give him time.

"We don't deserve you." Dean tried to let it sound like a joke but it was anything but.

"Too bad, you're stuck with me."

Now Sam stepped closer and in opposite to Dean his emotions were written all over his face.

"Thanks, man."

"Okay, enough with this." Dean threw his arms up and broke out of their little circle. "Let's stop this before Sam gets all sappy and wants to talk about his feelings. Nick, get your things, we're burning daylight." He grabbed his keys and headed for the door.

Nick kissed Sam goodby and Sam promised to call as soon as possible but they would probably be busy the next day or two. Nick promised to not worry, a promise he doubted he could keep. Every time they said they would be _busy_ and he shouldn't worry, he worried. He couldn't help it.


	6. Chapter 6

In the car Dean and Nick sat in silence for a minute because, honestly, Nick didn't know what to say without bombarding Dean with questions and judging by the tension in Dean's shoulders he was waiting for those questions. The big questions neither of them were ready to deal with. Hell, they had a lot of smaller things they should deal with first.

Nick wasn't sure if it was lack of trust on his part or if Sam and Dean wanted to respect his privacy and didn't ask because hey, he wasn't spilling his beans either. Or knowing Sam and Dean, they had gotten used to like things were and didn't know how to bring certain points up.

But then, especially with Dean it was always better to speak with actions than with words. Fingering the bracelet at his wrist Nick made a decision.

"Turn left." He said and directed Dean off their normal route. Maybe it was time for the next step. A small step but it was a start.

Dean raised an eyebrow but followed the instructions without a word.

"Stop at the second house on the right." Nick guided him to his place. Maybe if he gave up one of his secrets …

"This where you live?" Dean shut the engine off and ducked his head a little to have a look at the building. Trying to see it with fresh eyes Nick had a look as well. This wasn't the best neighborhood, in fact, this was one of the worst. Every building around here had seen better times, some abandoned, some not but all of them old and run down without people actually caring for them. The last part applied to the residents as well.

"Me and Aiden." Nick explained. "My roommate, we look out for each other." He added because he felt like he had to clarify that part.

Dean looked at the building and then at Nick.

"Thank you." He said and he sounded serious. Like this was important to him, like he knew what it meant for Nick. "I would return the favor but me and Sammy, we don't really have a place we can call home."

"You don't have a home?" Nick repeated a little dumbfounded. He had never really thought about it but somehow he'd always pictured them in a nice home, maybe not exactly the white picked fence crap but at least better than the hole he was living in.

"We have this car." Dean patted the wheel. "She's our home."

Dean fell silent for a moment and Nick thought about getting out of the car, Dean was in a hurry after all, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to open the door. The moment didn't feel quite over just yet.

"Dean Winchester." Dean turned towards him and hold his hand out as if they'd just met for the first time.

Overwhelmed by this gesture, Sam and Dean were men who knew how to keep their private life private, Nick took his hand and gave it a shake.

"Perkins." He answered. "Nick Perkins."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Perkins." Dean's lips twitched to a smile when he let the name roll over his tongue. "You for sure have your perks."

"Seriously?" Nick laughed and shook his head about Dean being Dean taking the seriousness out of the situation.

"What's Sam's last name?" Nick asked because when they were at it they could do it all the way, however, now Dean hesitated.

"You don't have to tell me." Nick hurried to say. "It's his decision."

"It's not that." Dean shifted uncomfortably but then he took a deep breath. "His name is also Winchester." He paused, clearly waiting for Nick's reaction.

"You two are married?" Nick burst out and for a second Dean stared at him as if he was insane. "Hey, it's cool. Totally okay with me. Congratulations."

To Nick's surprise Dean blushed, with burning cheeks and pink tips of his ears he blushed. He tried to cover it up with looking everywhere but Nick, though, and Nick pretended to not notice.

They were married, Nick hadn't expected that one. He wanted to asked who had popped the question, probably Sam, totally blindsiding Dean with it, and if they had a big ceremony and a lot more but he didn't ask. Dean was clearly uncomfortable with that topic maybe because it excluded Nick in such an absolute way.

"Who's that?" Dean changed the topic and Nick followed his line of sight and spotted the man watching them from behind the curtain.

"Mr. Mitchell, our landlord." Nick explained. "We call him Mr. Douchebag."

"Not a Mr. Nice Guy?"

"Let's say he doesn't like the way Aiden and I earn our money." Nick let out a sigh, this probably meant another hateful phone call from their landlord. "And he has something against not straight people."

"Hmm. I see." Dean nodded his head. "Let's give him something to watch."

With that he caught Nick's head in both hands and then he tried to eat Nick's face off. After a stunned second Nick started kissing back. It was the most sloppiest show off kiss ever and Nick couldn't help but laugh around Dean's tongue attacking his mouth. They ended with swollen lips and spit smeared all over the lower part of their faces and they grinned like two idiots.

"He's still watching." Nick observed and adjusted himself in his pants. "And I think I'm going to walk funny now." He pouted which made Dean laugh.

"Sucks to be you." Dean gave him a last kiss and reached over to open the door. "Sorry, but I have to kick you out, Sammy and I are on a tight schedule."

Nick felt Dean watching him and he made a show of walking like he had a baseball bat in his pants. When he reached the entrance, Nick waved at the window.

"Morning, Mr. Mitchell." But Mr. Mitchell shut the curtains and Nick turned towards Dean in a what-can-you-do manner.

Dean threw his head back in laughter and then he waved Nick goodby and the engine roared to life.

Following the car with his eyes, Nick spotted a woman staring at him on the other side of the street and his cheeks burned at the thought that she had seen their over the top kiss.

When she noticed that he had caught her, she turned away and hurried down the street as fast as she could, which wasn't that fast because of her heavy limping. Nick watched her for a moment, she didn't look familiar but that didn't mean much in this neighborhood.

Nick hurried to get inside. A moment later he collapsed on the couch, mind swirling with all the new information. His fingers danced over the rivets of his bracelet and he still couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that he just had his first anniversary with his boyfriends. His married boyfriends. Going by the name Winchester.

"You're home early." Aiden came out of his room and dropped next to him on the couch. "Trouble?"

Aiden never wasted time beating around the bush.

"They had to get an early start." Nick answered and wondered why he had to explain himself to Aiden.

_Because we watch out for each other,_ was the answer to that and Nick had to admit he liked that Aiden took interest in his love life. He was the only one he could talk to about things like this.

Nick knew a lot more about Sam and Dean now than ten minutes ago but he was still glad when Aiden didn't ask why they needed an early start.

"What's that?" Aiden nodded at his bracelet.

"This, my dear friend." Nick hold his arm out for him to see. "This is my gift I got from my boyfriends for our very first anniversary."

"You're kidding." With a look Aiden asked for permission before he unbuckled the bracelet to investigate it farther.

"Nope." Nick grinned at him.

Aiden had a closer look, his fingers tracing the outline of the pentagram in the middle.

"They are into occult stuff?"

"Maybe a little bit." Nick admitted, for some reason he felt offended. Teenage girls or old grandmas were _into occult stuff_ , Sam and Dean were grown men and they had never shown interest in the occult as far as he knew. Which wasn't that far if he was honest. And they both had that symbol tattooed on their chests, though.

"Sam, Nick, Dean." Aiden had found their names on the inner side. "They really mean it."

"Told you."

"I can't read the rest." He squinted at the words framing the names.

"I think it's Latin." Nick helped out. "I'm going to look it up later. Along with the symbols. Bet they have a deeper meaning."

"They didn't explain it to you?" Aiden gave the bracelet back and Nick fastened it around his wrist. Weird, he already felt naked without it.

"We had other things on our mind. I'll look it up later. That's what Google is for." He stretched and yawned, the night had been way too short. "For now I'm just tired. And hungry. Do we have any Lucky Charms left?"

Nick pushed himself up and sauntered over to their little kitchen area in search for breakfast.

"Whoa." Aiden made behind him. "They didn't feed you?"

"Like I said, they needed an early start." He sniffed at the milk and decided it smelled okay-ish enough, a little bit like the Chinese leftovers it had been sitting next to but not too badly. "No big deal."

"You sure everything is alright?" Aiden just couldn't drop it. "I mean you usually don't stumble in before noon and you always have breakfast with them."

"Everything is fine. Stop worrying." Nick came back to the couch and under Aiden's watchful eyes he had his breakfast. "You know they're busy. I think they squeezed their visit here in because they didn't want to miss this date. Sam promised me they'll have more time on their next visit. Maybe with a roll of rope." Nick added with a grin around half-chewed Lucky Charms.

"Dude, too much information." Aiden threw his hands up and finally dropped the topic. He meant well, Nick got that, but in this case it wasn't necessary. Everything was fine between him and the Winchesters, it would take a while to get used to that name, better than fine, if he was honest.

"If you don't mind, I'm going to take a nap." Nick slurped the last puddle of milk out of the bowl. "Beside everything else, we had some awesome sex last night and I'm exhausted."

"That's my boy." Aiden grinned at him and Nick flipped him off and then he shut the door of his room behind himself.

Nick shook his head in amusement and changed into t-shirt and sweatpants before he slipped under the covers. But he couldn't sleep just yet. He was tired but he couldn't get his fingers off the bracelet and his mind swirled around all the thing that had happened this morning. The biggest surprise had been seeing Dean so open and Nick felt honored for that.

He got the feeling that Sam and Dean would let him see more of their lives soon but he wouldn't push it. For a year now he had been fine without knowing that much about them and that hadn't changed. He knew everything he needed to know. With a sigh he curled on his side and instantly fell asleep.

Nick woke up to loud noises. Confused he looked around to figure out what woke him. Then Aiden screamed.


	7. Chapter 7

Bobby hadn't called Dean in the evening but he did call Sam in the morning. Just to make sure they got their asses on the road.

Then he went for his first coffee and called the hospital on the way to check on the succubus' latest victim. His wounds weren't life-threatening just like he'd predicted but the doctor Bobby spoke to was at a loss at what was happening with his patient besides the obvious.

"I've never seen anything like this, Agent Miller." The doctor said. "Even heavily sedated Mr. Coldwen is in pain and clearly in distress. We had to restrain him because he was attacking our nurses." He cleared his throat. "You know … in a sexual way. And he's suffering from priapism."

"What's that?" Bobby asked but he could guess what the doc meant.

"He has an erection for over four hours now. Way over four hours" The doc said it as if the four hours were important. With the succubus' venom in his system four hours were nothing.

The doc cleared his throat again. "My best guess is that this is a new kind of drug, maybe related to Viagra or similar drugs, but we couldn't find anything in his blood. Do you know anything about Mr. Coldwen using drugs?"

"As far as I know, he isn't using." Bobby said. He could have told the doc that he was looking for the wrong thing but he doubted the doctor would accept succubus venom as an explanation. And there wasn't much he could do to help Ethan through this anyway. Sex in any form could take the edge off but Bobby doubted the nurses were paid for that. So they could only wait until it wore off.

Bobby thanked the doc and ended the call. His next stop was the police station. He had already established himself as Agent Miller and for once the cops were actually willing to help. They gave him a desk in the corner and the printouts of every 911-call and all the reports of the night.

Barking dogs, a bar brawl, one case of possible domestic violence, one break-in in a store and a lot of calls leading to nothing. It was amazing how many people called 911 for things like their remote wasn't working and they couldn't switch to Oprah. Frustrated Bobby shoved the stack of useless papers way. He rubbed his beard and wondered what to do next. She was probably already two states away, dammit.

"Agent Miller?" One of the officers approached him, a young boy named Derren if Bobby remembered correctly.

"Yeah?" Bobby wasn't really interested in small talk but he put a smile on, maybe Officer Derren had something good.

"I heard you were looking for something weird and/or involving a naked woman?"

Now he had Bobby's attention.

"This call just came in, I though it would interest you." Officer Derren shifted from one foot to the other. "Well, it's not a woman but this is definitely weird. And he's naked."

Bobby drove with Officer Derren to the scene. When they arrived at the usually empty stretch of road it was already busy with cops and an ambulance and the coroner.

It took Bobby one look at the body laying in the ditch to know exactly what had happened. The man was around fifty, not usually her type but she had been desperate, and the wild claw-marks all over his naked body told Bobby that she had fed in a hurry. Next to the body lay his underwear and his phone and wallet but Bobby would bet his ball cap that the money was missing and that there was a succubs somewhere out there wearing this man's clothes.

Bobby didn't listen to the details like the name or where the man lived, that information was not important. He did make sure to get informed as soon as they found the car, though.

Officer Derren drove him back to town and frustrated Bobby returned to his motel. The succubus was gone. Maybe they would find the car but by then she would have found another man driving her wherever she wanted.

"Balls." He muttered and his mood didn't brighten when he turned around the corner to find the Impala sitting in the parking lot with two Winchesters playing hood ornament. Bobby parked next to them.

"You said eleven." Dean said and Bobby shut the door of his car with more force than necessary.

"Where have you been?" Sam slid down from the hood, both of them grinning and clearly enjoying themselves.

"Where I have been?" Bobby growled but had the sense to hold back his anger until they were inside his room.

"I needed you here yesterday." Bobby threw his jacket on the bed and loosened his tie and after putting his ball cap on he felt like himself again.

"Bobby, we're sorry." Sam tried to calm him down but he didn't want to calm down. One man dead, another one in the hospital and the succubus got away and all that because he had been alone on this one. The last thing he wanted to do was to calm down.

"Yeah, sorry we couldn't make it." Dean had the nerve to say.

"You're sorry." Bobby repeated. "If you had been on the other side of the country, I would understand. If you were working a case, I would understand. If one of you were injured, I would understand. But no, you were busy." He threw the last words in Dean's face.

"Look Bobby." Dean tried to be reasonable. "I get that you're angry at us but this was important."

"Than tell me." Bobby challenged him. "Tell me what's so important that it's worth a man's life."

"What?" Sam and Dean shared a look and for the first time guilt crept over their faces.

"I'm just coming from a crime scene. She has killed again before she skipped town." Bobby sat down on his bed and adjusted his cap again. "It's over, she's gone. You can go back to whatever important stuff you were doing." He waved them off and wondered where he'd stored his bottle of Jack.

"Bobby." Sam sat down next to him and he already felt his anger evaporate. "We are sorry."

"Tell that the guy in the hospital." Bobby hold on to his anger. He knew it was stupid and it wasn't their fault, not really, and he had the suspicion that he sounded more like John now but still. He looked from one to the other.

"Do you know what he's going through?" Bobby asked. "Can you even imagine what that venom does to him?" Dean's face turned to stone while Sam looked close to tears. "They had to sedate and restrain him and he's still in agony. Can you imagine that? Can you?" Fueled by the last fumes of his anger Bobby yelled the last words at them.

A muscle in Dean's jaw twitched, the only sign of live in his stone-cold face, even his eyes looked dead, and then he just turned and left the room without a word.

"Dean." Sam was half-way at the door but his brother shut it in his face and for a second Sam stood in the middle of the room with his hand outstretched before his arm dropped lifeless at his side.

"Dammit, Bobby. Was that really necessary?" Sam didn't look at him, eyes fixed on the door, and he sounded more exhausted than angry.

"What's with him?" Bobby was honestly confused.

"Dean can imagine." Sam said and it took Bobby a second to remember his own words. "In fact, he doesn't need to imagine."

"God." Bobby rubbed his face when he finally got what Sam was trying to tell him. "Where you with him?"

"No." Sam slumped down next to him again. So far Bobby hadn't heard the Impala so it was a save bet that Dean wasn't far.

"It happened while I was in Stanford." Sam let out a sigh and Bobby didn't dare to ask if at least John had been with Dean. That man wasn't known for his bedside manners but everything was better than to suffer through this alone. Somebody to be just there. To untie you when it was over.

"Dad sent him on that hunt alone. He didn't even know what it was." Sam shook his head in disbelief. "When Dean figured it out he was already poisoned. He finished the hunt and skipped town and then searched for a place to ride it out." Sam's voice broke and now tears fell from his eyes. "He went through it alone on the dirty floor of an abandoned house in the middle of nowhere where nobody could hear him scream."

Sam sniffed and wiped the tears away with the back of his hand and Bobby sat next to him with burning eyes and no idea what to say.

"Sam." He cleared his throat. "I didn't know. I'm sorry." Five minutes ago he'd thrown those words right back in their faces but there was nothing else to say.

"I know." Sam stood up. "I should go after him."

"Do that." Bobby rubbed his hands on his jeans. "Bring him back in and in the meantime I find my bottle of Jack. I think we all need a healthy shot." It wasn't even noon but getting drunk looked like a good idea right then.

"Sounds good." Sam even managed the ghost of a smile.

"Balls." Bobby muttered when Sam had shut the door behind himself. Glancing out of the window he spotted the brothers with their hands in their pockets leaning against the Impala and it didn't look like they were talking at all. They just stood there, close enough for their shoulders to touch, and stared into nothingness.

When they came back in a few minutes later Bobby had the bottle and three glasses ready. And he had used the time to pack, no point in staying.

Dean finished his drink and poured himself a second one before the others had even reached for their glasses but nobody said something about that.

"What are we going to do next?" Dean finally asked.

"The car she's stolen is our only lead." Bobby leaned back in his chair. "But, honestly, I think she's gone. I'll keep my ears out, though." Not much else he could do.

Dean nodded to himself and swirled his glass between his hands. "So we screwed up."

"It's not your fault, son." Bobby said.

"Earlier that sounded different." Dean countered and he was right. It had sounded different and Bobby already regretted that.

"I was angry." It was a weak excuse, he knew that. "Dean, I'm sorry." That seemed to be the word of the day. He wanted to say more but Dean's phones started ringing.

Glancing at the caller ID Dean's eyes went wide.

"It's Nick." He said to his brother but went outside to take the call. Sam was clearly itching to follow him but he stayed with Bobby while they both strained their ears but at least Bobby didn't hear more than some muffled talking.

"Who's Nick?" Bobby finally asked. This was the first time he heard that name. He didn't know a hunter by that name but maybe he was a friend? Yeah, Winchesters were famous for befriending random people.

"A friend." Was Sam's short answer and before Bobby could ask farther, Dean stormed back in, phone still at his ear and something close to panic written all over his face.

"Dean?" Sam raised from his chair. "Is he okay?"

"No, he's not." Dean shook his head and then his attention switched back to the phone. "We're coming. Hang on, man, we're on our way." And then he was talking to Sam again. "He got attacked."

"Is he hurt?"

"Don't know. He's pretty much out of it." He listened to the phone. "Nicky, keep talking, I'm here. We're coming."

They didn't waste time with talking. The next second they were sprinting to their car, leaving Bobby dumbfounded behind.

"I'm coming with you." He grabbed his bag and hurried after them.

"Ehm, Bobby." Sam turned towards him while Dean started the car. "We got this."

Bobby had no idea who Nick was but the Winchesters clearly cared about him and if he was in trouble they could probably use his help. It was the least he could do.

"Dean, drive." Bobby ordered. "I'm right at your tail."


	8. Chapter 8

The ally wasn't that long but when Ishtar finally reached the end and squinted into the sudden light of the street lamps, she was heavily leaning against the wall and her leg was a cramped mess of agony. She needed to get that bullet out.

Catching her breath she stood in the shadows for a moment and kept an eye out for cars. At this time of the night traffic had died down to almost nothing and she appreciated that. The last thing she wanted to do was to draw attention. The hunter was still out there, no doubt.

When a car came near, she pushed herself off the wall and made a step towards the sidewalk but her leg buckled and she landed hard on her knees and bit back a scream.

"Dammit." She cursed but when she caught a glimpse of the driver she shied back into the shadows. The hunter.

With a whimper she crawled backwards, waiting for the car to stop, waiting for him to yell and shoot at her. But the car passed by without slowing down.

She had to get out of this town. Now. Ishtar forced herself to count to thirty before she stumbled back to the sidewalk. She half expected to see his car sitting just around the corner but the street was empty.

When the next car came down the street, she took the risk.

"Help!" She yelled, waving one arm while she hobbled hunched over farther towards the street. She managed three steps before she collapsed again, damn leg, but next to her the car stopped and then a door opened and footsteps hurried around the car.

"Oh my god!" A man yelled and then shoes came into her line of sight. He knelt beside her and Ishtar smiled.

"Are you okay?" He asked and she nearly burst out in laughter. It was the middle of the night, she lay stark naked on the sidewalk covered in blood and grime and had a quite obvious hole in her leg and he asked if she was okay?

"I've been better." She muttered and reached for him before he could figure out that it probably was a good idea to call an ambulance. Smashing their mouths together she forced as much saliva into him as she could wring out of her dry mouth. He tasted of cigarettes and medication and even over the heavy smell of blood all around her Ishtar caught the scent of cancer. He was past his prime, his life force notable dimmed but he was all she had. She could work with that. She had to.

With wide blown pupils he stared down at her but grabbed her hand when she reached for him.

"Help me in the car." She ordered.

"I drive you to the hospital." Carefully he helped her to settle in the passenger seat and then hurried around the car.

"No hospital." She shook her head and rearranged her leg until she found a position she could bear. "Just drive. Out of town."

They drove for a while but with every passing minute his eyes were more on her than the road and the smell of his arousal clouded the car. They would come to that, eventually, Ishtar needed every drop of his life force she could get but with her leg busted up like it was she wasn't up for sex at the moment.

"Do you have a pocket knife?" She asked and wiped sweat from her brow. She felt sticky and itchy everywhere and she desperately wanted a shower but with every little bump the car made hot lances of agony shot through her leg so that was the first thing she had to deal with.

For a second he looked at her in confusion.

"I'm not sure." He admitted. "Maybe in the glove compartment. I think Jason has left his there."

There actually was a knife in the compartment but when she opened it, Ishtar cringed. Whoever this Jason was, he didn't care for his things. The blade was dull and jagged but it was all she had at hand.

"Pull over." She ordered and then switched the light in the car on.

"What are you doing?" He asked and in the poor light of the car he probably had his first real look at her wound. It was her first look, too, and she sucked in a breath at the sight of her limb. The hole was dark with dead crisp tissue surrounding it and the rest of her thigh was just red and hot and swollen. But it had stopped bleeding.

"I have to get the bullet out." She informed him, probing the flesh around the hole. This was going to be fun.

"Here? Now?" He reached for the keys again. "The hospital isn't far."

"I said no!" With her claw digging in the meat of his shoulder she dragged him closer and forced another dose of saliva into his mouth.

"I'm doing this and in the meantime you better get naked." She ordered and shoved him away. The taste of cigarettes made her sick but that was the last of her problems.

Obedient he started to unbutton his shirt.

Ishtar grabbed the knife tighter and took a deep breath.

"Here goes nothing." She gritted her teeth and carefully inserted the blade in the wound. Her scream echoed through the car and she trashed in her seat but hold on to the knife. After the first wave of pain she dug her own claw into her thigh to keep the limb steady while she searched for the bullet.

Finally bullet and knife clattered to the floor and breathless Ishtar just hold her leg with both hands while she waited for the pain to subside to something she could deal with.

The now naked man sat next to her penis fat and leaking between his legs and his hands twitching in the poorly suppressed need to touch her.

"Please." He whimpered probably not for the first time while he stroked himself. His other hand landed on her shoulder and she shrugged him off. He wailed in frustration.

"Outside." She ordered and opened her door. He was around the car in a heartbeat which was good because he was there to catch her when she just fell out of the open door. Together they moved a few feet away from the car and then she just lay there on her back on a damp patch of grass, looking up to a cloudy sky with no stars and spread her legs a little bit. Every movement sent fresh pain through her and she knew it would get worse with what was coming next but it was the only way to make it better.

"Fuck me." She braced herself for the pain. "And you better be gentle." She gritted out but she knew, high on her venom, he was a horny animal which couldn't go gentle on her. Normally she had the strength to manhandle him even in this state but now she couldn't do much more than to lay there and take it.

He plunged into her, grunting and sweating, and she screamed with every jolt going through her body. When he came deep in her she clenched around him, milking him, and with every spurt of come she took more of his energy. It was dim and dirty but it was enough to dull the pain and to start the healing.

But she needed more. Without letting him catch his breath she slung her legs around him, crossed her ankles on the low of his back and forced him even deeper into her.

"Hey, limp-dick." She smacked his face to stir him up again. "We're not done yet."

She drove her claws in his back, slicing through skin and muscle, while she canted her hips to meet his thrusts.

She came with his blood dripping down on her and he followed her a second later. Green light from her half-closed eyes illuminated his surprised face when she sucked him dry of his energy. His face slackened and she rolled him off her and then she just lay there for a minute.

She had fed, yes, and it helped her but it wasn't enough. The silver had been in her flesh way too long, causing farther damage but she felt the wound healing.

Still a bit clumsy Ishtar came to her feet. The man's clothes lay on the back seat and they were better than nothing so she put them on. They didn't fit but this was a temporary solution anyway.

Ishtar took the money but left phone and wallet behind and a minute later she was on the road again.

The body would be found and the hunter would make the connection, no doubt about that, so she didn't plan on keeping the car.

In the next town she found a quite helpful young man, who was happy to help her out. He took her home and let her use his shower and after an awesome round in the bed her gave her some of his girlfriend's clothes and all the money he had at hand and he insisted on her taking his car. How could she say no to that?

She would have loved to kill him, to take all of his life force, but she hold back and took just enough to keep her going. No need to leave a trail.

After their little fuck sleep was tempting but Ishtar wanted to put as much distance between herself and the hunter as possible.

So she kissed him goodby and whispered in his ear.

_You can keep a secret, right? No need to tell anybody about me. A friend borrowed your car, that's all they need to know. This is our little secret. Right?_

"Right." He leaned into her touch with a dreamy smile. "Our little secret."

Ishtar drove until early morning and she knew she should keep going but her leg still wasn't completely healed and she was tired and exhausted and so she stopped in a random town to find somebody who would take her in for a day or two. As long as she didn't kill anybody the hunter should have trouble finding her and maybe he would give up eventually.

Ishtar left the car with the door open and the keys in the ignition. In a neighborhood like this it would be gone in less than five minutes.

It was too early for the streets to be busy and she limped slowly down the sidewalk hoping to find somebody young and strong.

When she spotted the car she stopped dead. That car. His car.

She shook her head in bemusement. Just an Impala like thousand others just like it. But when she came closer she had a good view on the man in the driver's seat and that wasn't one like a thousand others.

Dean Winchester.

Ishtar's hand sneaked up to her face, touching smooth skin but she knew about the scars hidden underneath.

There was another man with him in the car and for a second she thought this was the famous little brother. Ishtar could still hear Dean's deep voice bragging about little Sammy who'd made it Ivy League or something. At least during sex he'd shut up about his brother and then …

Ishtar shoved that memory deep down in her mind and made a few steps closer to have a look at the second man.

They kissed. Not just a goodby kiss, no this was a massaging each other's tonsils porn star kiss.

Gasping at them Ishtar tried to make sense out of what she was seeing. Okay, not the brother, that much was clear but Dean Winchester and another man? He was playing for both teams?

While she tried to wrap her mind around the new fact the two men parted and Dean drove off. When the other man caught her staring Ishtar hurried to limp away.

Dean Winchester. Was he here because of her? It couldn't be. Three hours ago she'd no idea that she would end up in this town. Actually, she didn't even know which town this was.

Old fear rose again and she wanted to run. Run as far away as she could. And that was the point. She couldn't. She was at the end of her rope, she needed to rest and heal.

Her mark on him had faded long ago but maybe unconsciously, in her current need to feed, she was drawn to an old mark. Yeah, as if she would feed off a hunter.

Ishtar stopped and turned around, looking at the building the other man, the man Dean Winchester obviously cared about, had disappeared in. A grim smile crept on her lips.


	9. Chapter 9

Nick jolted awake. Something heavy crashed against a wall and glass shattered and then Aiden screamed. Nick had never heard anything like that before. High pitched and full of terror, a scream right out of nightmares. And then it was cut off. One second Aiden screamed at the top of his lungs and the next everything was deadly quiet.

Nick grabbed his phone and hurried to the door, caught between calling the police and checking on Aiden. He opened the door a crack.

The living room was a mess. The shattering had been the TV now lying in pieces on the floor and the couch stood in the kitchen, however it fit in there, and in the middle of the room stood a woman. She hadn't noticed him yet and when she limped over to the corner where a lifeless Aiden lay on the floor Nick recognized her. The woman who had stared at Dean and him earlier.

She grabbed Aiden by the neck and picked him up like he weighted nothing. He struggled against her hand on his throat so he wasn't dead. Yet.

The woman was of average high, slim figured and by no means should she be able to pick up a grown man like this.

_She's high on something,_ Nick thought. That was the only explanation. His thumb pressed the 9 on his phone but he must have made a sound because her head snapped in his direction and their eyes met.

"There you are." She purred and there was an awful cracking sound and Aiden's head lolled to the side. When she let go of him he fell down like a rag doll and didn't move anymore.

Nick just stared at the scene in front of him, thumb hovering over the 1 but he had forgotten what he had been about to do.

"Pretty boy." Even limping she managed to saunter over to him quite seductively and took the phone out of his numb hand. With her other hand she grabbed his chin and turned his head from one side to the other to survey his face.

"He has taste, I give him that." She let go of him. "But, of course, I knew that before."

"What do you want?" Nick backed off a little bit and was now trapped in the doorway to his room with her blocking the only way out.

"You know Dean Winchester."

It wasn't a question but he nodded nevertheless.

"Are you two doing it?" She crept closer and Nick backed off another step. "Fucking each other's brains out? Earlier it sure like hell looked like that." Her smile was cold and for a second Nick swore he saw her eyes gleaming green. But then he grabbed the door and smashed it in her face. At least he intended to.

"You're a fighter." She caught the door with ease and shoved back, hitting him instead. "I like that."

Nick stumbled backwards. She was on him in a heart-beat and he thought she would hit him or grab him like she'd done with Aiden but instead she almost gently hold his face in her hands and then their lips met in a kiss.

Nick pressed his lips together and tried to turn his head but her grip turned iron, holding his head in place. Her tongue traced his lips, wiggling its way in and he gritted his teeth against the forced kiss.

She backed off, a knowing smile on her lips, and her taste still lingered in Nick's mouth. Somewhat sweet and a little bitter but not unpleasant. Nervously he licked his lips and suddenly he wanted more.

"That's better, isn't it?" She gave him another kiss and this time he welcomed it.

"What are you doing?" Nick stepped back and rubbed his mouth with the back of his hand.

"I'm messing with Dean's little boyfriend." She clicked her tongue and then her hand was on his chest, fingers spread wide over his rapidly beating heart. Confused Nick just stood there.

He wasn't into women. She was pretty, he had to admit that, but he didn't find her attractive. This was all wrong, the rational part of his brain knew that, however, there was the urge to kiss her again. Heat spread through his body, his heart raced and his cock started to twitch in interest.

"Please, don't." He backed off another step and his legs bumped into his bed. She kissed him again, her tongue exploring his mouth while her hands sneaked under his t-shirt, thumbs brushing over his nipples.

His mind screamed _no_ but his body betrayed him. It reacted under her touch. His nipples pebbled and his cock rose and unintentionally he stole another kiss from her.

"Tell me about Dean." She caressed his ribcage and he shuddered under her hands. He needed more.

"What do you want to know?" He breathed into the soft skin of her neck, she smelled of soap and fruity shampoo.

"Is he still bragging about his little brother?" She urged him out of his t-shirt and he willingly lifted his arms to help her.

"Brother?"

"Sam?" She licked over his right nipple. "Sammy, the boy genius? Back then he couldn't shut up about him. Very annoying."

"Sam is his brother?" That sobered him. He grabbed her shoulders and managed to hold her at bay for a second.

"Of course he's his brother." She rolled her eyes and shrugged his hands off with ease. "What did you think?"

She must have read something on his face because she narrowed her eyes and looked at him closely.

"What _did_ you think?"

When he didn't answer she pressed her mouth on his again and suddenly he didn't know anymore why he'd hesitated.

"They're lovers." He answered and chased after her mouth for another kiss. "Married even."

"Married?" She burst out laughing. "That's a good one."

Nick couldn't think clearly. Sam and Dean were brothers? He thought about all the things they had done together, the kinky sex, but that didn't matter at the moment, right now he thought more about the things he could do with this beautiful woman.

"Wow." She made and he smiled at her, confused but happy. "Have you seen them fucking?"

"Sure." He pressed his body against hers, catching her leg between his which gave his cock some much needed friction. "They're doing it like rabbits."

He started humping her and there were definitively too many clothes in the way.

"How do you fit in?" She asked but her hands were on his ass now so he didn't mind her talking that much.

"I'm their little fuck toy." He cupped her breasts through her blouse and it felt different to what a chest normally felt, all soft and round, and he wasn't sure if he liked it.

"I like breaking other people's toys." She kissed him again and worked her way down his neck. "Undress me."

Without thinking he helped her out of her blouse and bra, fingertips brushing over smooth skin, pushed down her pants and underwear and then he knelt in front of her to help her out of her shoes and pants. She had a not quite healed wound in her thigh and Nick made sure to be extra careful around there.

With a hand on his shoulder she kept him down.

"While you're down there." She smirked at him and pushed her hip in his face. Getting the drift he darted his tongue out and started to eat her out but this was unfamiliar terrain and he wasn't even sure if he was doing it right. The part of him that knew how wrong this was screamed louder now in his mind. If he made a dash for the door …

"Oh no, you don't." She forced him up and kissed him again and every thought of escape vanished. Why would he want to run anyway when she was right here?

She muttered something about gay guys but Nick didn't pay attention because she was pushing down his sweatpants and his hard cock sprung free. A second later he was naked except for the bracelet around his wrist.

"And by the way?" She shoved him backwards until he fell down on the bed. "You suck at eating pussy."

"I'm sorry." He mumbled, he really was. He wanted to please her, wanted to make it good for her.

"You will be sorry." She grabbed his aching cock and the touch alone nearly made him come but then she squeezed and he grunted in pain and she squeezed more.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He yelled out and for a second it felt like she was about to rip his dick off. When she let go, he sobbed in relief and at the same time he was aching for more.

"Please." He begged and didn't know anymore what he was begging for. There was just need.

She straddled him and leaned forward until they were flushed together, her face only inches from his. With her fingers she combed through his hair and her breath brushed hot over his lips.

"We are going to have so much fun." She whispered and shifted above him, teasing him. Nick felt her hot wetness on his lower belly and his cock brushed against the globes of her ass.

"Please." He whimpered and he couldn't hold back the tears. "Please, I need ... need."

"I know what you need." She pushed herself up and slowly sank down on him. "And we have all day."

She surrounded him, wet and hot and tight, and it was exactly what he needed.

"C'mon, be a good fuck toy." Her fingertips raked down his chest. It felt like knives and it felt good and he arched into her touch. She rode him hard and fast, guiding one of his hands to rest at her waist and the other one between her legs where he rubbed that little nub he felt there and this time he must have done it right because she bowed her back and fisted her hair while sweat glistered on her breasts. When she came her eyes glowed green.

Nick followed her, screaming out his own orgasm, his cock spasm and spurting deep inside her and all of a sudden he felt drained, like he could sleep for a week.

She rolled off him and for a moment they just lay side by side with heaving chests in the afterglow. But the need was still there. His cock was still hard or again already, he couldn't tell, however, he needed more.

"Now I know why Dean keeps you." Her fingertip circled his nipple. "You are a good fuck toy. Do they both have their fun with you at the same time or do they take turns?" She arched an eyebrow at him. "I'm curious. C'mon, two incest brothers sharing one fuck toy, that's pretty hilarious. And sick by the way, but who am I to judge?"

Nick didn't want to answer, in fact he didn't want to be there with her at all.

"What did you do to me?" He asked instead and rolled away from her. "Drugged me?"

"Hmm, kind of." She kissed him. "You know, this gets really annoying. Why can't you be at least a little bit bi?"

"Uh?" He made but the question disappeared in a fog of lust.

"You wanted to tell me about Sam and Dean." She reminded him. Her hand was on his cock and as long as he kept talking her hand kept moving so he talked. And it was good for a while.

"I need more." He tried to roll on top of her but she stopped him. "Please."

"I know." She came up to her hands and knees and wiggled her bottom. "Come here. This time you're doing all the work."


	10. Chapter 10

They did it doggy style with Nick doing all the work, just like she'd said he would. Then they rolled to their sides and he spooned up behind her, holding her tight with his hand between her breasts, and fucked her this way. He hadn't even known it was possible for a man to come that often in such a short amount of time but he was pretty sure the last one he came dry. There was nothing left, he was spent and exhausted like he'd never been in his life.

And then she kissed him and her fingertips danced over his worn out cock and it started to fill again. Nick whimpered in pain and need but she just laughed and slapped his ass.

"Time for a break. I'm hungry." She announced and rolled out of the bed. "What kind of host are you anyway? Letting a lady starve. You could at least offer me a drink."

Naked as she was she walked out of the room, still limping but it was less prominent now, and Nick nearly fell out of the bed in the desperate attempt to hold her back.

"Please, don't go." He cried and tried to follow her. His legs refused to hold him and he collapsed on the floor with his arm trapped beneath him and the rivets of his bracelet digging into his skin. Nick hissed in pain and came up to hands and knees. He couldn't walk? Fine, he could crawl.

By the time he reached the living room she had already freed the couch out of the kitchen and had found the Chinese leftovers in the fridge.

"Who was that, anyway?" Chewing she leaned against the counter and pointed with the chopsticks at something in the corner. The couch blocked Nick's view and he was thankful for that.

"Aiden." He came up to his knees and wrapped his hand around his aching cock. Before he'd thought stories about guys chafing from too much sex were exaggerated. Now he had the proof in hand, quite literally, and he still needed more.

"My roommate." He added and despite the growing pain he pumped his fist along his shaft. "Please."

"Don't rush me." She picked up a piece of meat and examined it as if it was the most interesting thing ever. "You have one, maybe two rounds in you before you die from exhaustion. I want to enjoy this as long as I can. I owe Dean that much."

Nick still had no idea how she knew Dean or what had happened between them but he couldn't care less. Even dying didn't sound that bad if it meant that she would come back to him.

"Please." He crawled closer, having just enough sense left to not crawl straight through the shattered pieces of the TV. "Please. Need you. Fuck me. Please."

"If you ask so nicely." Finally she put the container down and licked the chopsticks clean. Thinking she tapped them at her lip and then a smile crept on her face. "You like getting fucked, don't you?"

"Yes." He nodded. "Anything. Just please."

He tried to reach for her but lost his balance and fell face first to the floor.

"You're getting the idea, great." She came closer. "Stay this way. Don't move."

Nick stayed that way, face pressed into the carpet and ass up in the air. An unfamiliar touch made him twitch but he quickly identified it as the chopsticks trailing along his spine all the way down to the crack of his ass. The two tips circled his entrance and in a clear moment he realized what was about to happen but the sudden pain still caught him by surprise.

The chopsticks weren't that thick, however, without any preparation and with only a little bit of spit to ease the way it felt like she'd just rammed a sledge-hammer into him.

Nick wailed in pain but she hold him in place, fingertips digging into his skin like claws, and she brutally fucked him with the sticks.

"What's the matter, pretty boy?" She asked and rotated the sticks deep inside him. "Thought you like this. Don't want you to miss out on something just because I lack certain parts."

He couldn't answer, there was just pain. He clawed at the carpet in the hopeless attempt to get away but she was too strong.

After an eternity she flipped him over and the glass-pieces of the TV bit in his back but he barely noticed it because the sticks were still inside him, buried deep, stabbing him from the inside with the sudden movement. He screamed but she clamped her hand over his mouth.

"Stop bitching around. You're enjoying this." As a proof she stroke his fully erected cock and he jolted in a mixture of pain and lust.

"See?" She sank down on his shaft. "You want it."

She reached behind herself and grabbed the chopsticks again. She fucked him and rode him in a matching rhythm, perverting Nick's favorite position he had with Sam and Dean.

If it was the pain or the fact that she hadn't kissed him in a while Nick didn't know but his mind became clearer. The fog of lust and need lifted and in a clear moment he grabbed her to throw her off.

He wasn't sure what happened next. The buckle of his bracelet got caught in the wound in her leg. Then all of a sudden she screamed and wailed and there was the smell of burning flesh.

He threw her off but she was over him again the next second. They struggled and weak as he was he had no chance of fighting her off for long. He kept her mouth away from his, if she managed to kiss him he was doomed, he knew that, and frantically searched for a weapon, anything. For some reason she shied away from him when his hand with the bracelet came close to her face and that gave him the second he needed to grab a piece of the shattered TV.

When she dove in to kiss him the next time, he rammed the glass in her throat. Her eyes went almost comically wide in surprise. She made a gargling sound and blood dripped down on Nick and then she collapsed on top of him.

For a second Nick just lay there with her lying motionless on him but then he started to move. He rolled her off and got the chopsticks out before he crawled away from her.

Back pressed against the wall and his knees drawn to his chest he just sat there and cried. His erection finally died down, the need gone, leaving him all empty and tired with a dull pain in his lower regions. He was so tired.

But he couldn't sleep, not yet. First he had to call the police or go to the hospital or … he didn't know what to do.

He wanted a shower, wanted to get her smell off his skin. He wanted to sleep and for the pain to go away. He wanted this to never have happened.

Nick looked around the trashed living room. Aiden lay there but when he crawled over to him to check for a sign of life, he found Aiden's eyes staring at nothing and his skin cold to the touch.

"Aiden." Fresh tears filled his eyes. Aiden was dead.

Nick looked over to the woman lying in her own blood. She was dead, too. He had killed her.

 _It was self-defense_ , he told himself. _I had no choice._

Would they believe him? Was it even true? She hadn't forced him.

How many times had he said _please_? How many times had he said that he needed it? And he'd never come that often in a row in his life.

He rushed to the bathroom and made it just in time before he spilled Lucky Charms and curdled milk in the bowl. When nothing was left, he hung dry heaving over the toilet.

He didn't know how long he sat on the cold floor with his cheek resting on the toilet seat but eventually he forced himself up to his feet. He needed to get moving.

Methodically he washed the tears and the snot off his face, got rid of most of the blood, _her blood, this is her blood_ , and then gently wiped his groin. There was blood on the washcloth when he wiped his hole and he could only hope that she hadn't done any serious damage to him. The pain was still there but bearable and with the wall to support himself he made it over to his room.

He had to sit down on the bed to dress himself and when he stood up he left a bloody spot on the sheet.

He found his phone on the floor where she'd dropped it and he nearly face-planted when he picked it up and he had to lean against the door frame until the world stopped spinning. Black spots danced in front of his eyes and he just wanted to collapse but then he caught some movement in the corner of his eye.

She was moving. Her fingers twitched and she blinked at him.

That got him into action. He clutched his phone and hurried past her but stopped when he saw her face. It looked different now, deformed with thick scars crisscrossing it like somebody had tried to cut her face to pieces. Her mouth moved like she was trying to say something but the piece of glass in her throat kept the words inside.

Nick turned away and left the apartment. He probably should call an ambulance for her but he didn't want to.

Making his way slowly down the stairs he thought about what had happened. Not about what _had_ happened, because he never wanted to think about that again, but about her. About her glowing eyes and he swore he'd seen some light between their bodies, too. About her changed face. About her strength. About her kiss.

Nobody would believe him.

"Hey fag, what's with the noise?" Mr. Douchebag poked his head out when Nick passed his door and Nick just wanted to yell at him: "Now you care?" but he saved his breath for the next step and the one after that.

Hunched over and painfully slow Nick left his apartment behind. He stepped into the bright sunlight and turned left and just kept going. He couldn't remember if he'd closed the door behind himself and he wondered how long it would take Mr. Douchebag to discover the mess he'd left behind.

Nick kept walking for as long as he could. He stumbled into a back ally with dirt and trash piled up the walls and he crawled between two dumpsters and just crashed there. Somehow he had his phone still in hand but he had no idea who to call.

He wiped fresh tears from his face and managed to scratch himself with the bracelet. The buckle was bent and there was blood all over it, already soaked into the leather. He'd ruined it. They had given it to him for their anniversary and he'd ruined it.

Curled up to a ball he cried again until there were no tears left.

Would Sam and Dean believe him? Or would they call him crazy? Would they want him around anymore after this? After he'd let this woman … He couldn't bring that thought to an end.

He had no one else he could turn to so he scrolled through his contact list until he found Dean's name but he didn't hit the call button. What should he say? They had a busy day, should he really bother them with this? Shouldn't he man up and deal with his problems on his own? He wasn't even sure if he could tell them what had happened.

More by accident than anything else Nick hit the call button and then he held his breath while he listened to the ringing. Finally Dean answered.

"Dean?" Nick cried in relief.


	11. Chapter 11

The next two hours Bobby just tried to stay at Dean's tail. The boy drove like he was racing the devil himself but thankfully they didn't run into any cops. Bobby wasn't sure if a cop trying to pull Dean over would live long enough to regret it.

During the drive Bobby had time to think. First of all: Who was Nick? He still had no clue and no matter how much he wracked his brain he couldn't remember one of the boys ever referring to somebody with that name.

And why didn't they want him on this one? If this Nick was in danger or hurt, Bobby could probably help. But the only reason Bobby was right behind the Impala was because Sam hadn't come up with something to send him off.

Not getting anywhere with those questions Bobby's mind persisted on returning to the little fact that Dean had encountered a succubus before. That the man he loved like his own son had gone through the withdrawal alone. Alone on the dirty floor of some abandoned house. Did John know and if so did he care? In moments like this Bobby wished that bastard was still alive so he could kill him.

Bobby gritted his teeth and nearly missed the turn Dean took in front of him. When they reached the town Dean finally slowed down but not by much and he drove like he knew his way around this place pretty well.

They finally stopped in a rundown neighborhood that had seen better times.

"Okay, we fan out. I take this direction." Dean waved ahead. "Sam, you go left and Bobby …" Now he hesitated like he'd just realized that Bobby was also there.

"I look over there." Bobby took over. "This allies are like a maze. What am I looking for, Dean?"

"His name is Nick, he's hurt." Dean explained while Sam already took off, yelling the man's name.

"He said he hid behind a dumpster." Dean yelled over his shoulder and seconds later Bobby was alone.

"Balls." He muttered under his breath and went searching in the alley the brothers had left for him. From the distance he heard the occasional bellowed "Nick!" followed by the hopeful silence waiting for an answer.

"Nick?" He started yelling himself. After fruitless minutes he rejoined with Sam.

"Anything?" Sam asked and spread his arms in a helpless gesture.

"You sure he's around here somewhere?" Bobby asked and together they started another round around the area.

"He has to be here." Sam muttered. "Nick!"

When his phone started ringing Sam answered it before the first ring was finished.

"You found him?" He barked into the phone and a second later he took off running. Bobby followed him, cursing those damn long legs.

When he caught up with them he found Dean kneeling between two dumpsters with Sam hovering over him, eager to do something but in the narrow space there was nothing he could do.

"Dean." There was a new voice and arms sneaked around Dean's neck, clinging tightly to him and then Bobby spotted a head with the face buried in the crook of Dean's neck. Impatiently Sam shoved one of the dumpsters aside to get access to the man hiding behind.

"Hey, Nick." Sam said in a soft voice and all of a sudden Bobby felt like an intruder.

"Okay, let's get you outa here." Dean shifted, getting a better hold of the man in his arms. "Can you walk? Okay, that's a no. Sammy, get his other side."

Only when his eyes fell on Bobby Dean seemed to remember once again that they weren't alone.

"Get the car." He threw him the keys and Bobby didn't waste time. One look at the man now hanging between the Winchesters told him that he needed at least a bed or maybe even a hospital. Either way, he needed it as soon as possible.

The young man, Nick, didn't want to let go of Dean so they ended up with Sam driving the Impala, Bobby in the passenger seat, he would come back for his car later, and Dean and Nick in the back seat.

"Motel or hospital?" Sam asked with a worried glance in the rear-view mirror. "Dean, hospital?"

But it was the mysterious Nick who finally answered: "No hospital. Please."

The brothers exchanged a look through the mirror and Dean gave Sam a little nod and with that it was settled.

"Okay, no hospital." Dean brushed the hair out of Nick's face who still clung to Dean as if his life depended on it. "Can you tell us what happened?"

Nick's gaze landed on Bobby and once again Bobby felt like he didn't belong there.

"I'm Bobby." He tried in his friendliest voice, the last thing he wanted to do was to spook the kid farther. Nick was around Sam's age but scared like he was he looked about five. "I'm a friend of Sam and Dean."

Nick's gaze shifted to Dean who confirmed that with a nod. It was clear that Nick still felt uncomfortable around Bobby, however, before they could push him to talk, Sam steered the car into a parking lot and shut the engine off.

"I'll get us a room." He shifted in his seat to meet Nick's eyes. "We can talk inside, sounds good?"

Nick nodded into Dean's chest and Sam hurried to get them a room.

By the time he came back Bobby had already decided to wait outside because Nick clearly wouldn't open up with him around and he couldn't blame him. He was a complete stranger to him.

What did surprise Bobby was the meaningful look Dean directed at him while he and Sam had one of their silent conversations.

They ended up with Dean guiding Nick inside and Sam and Bobby staying outside and Bobby couldn't shake off the feeling that Sam was somewhat guarding the room. Was he afraid Bobby would eavesdrop on them?

"Okay, Sam. Who is he?" Bobby asked after he'd watched Sam pacing in front of the door for a minute.

"A friend."

"Looks like a very close friend."

"Yeah, we are social enough to have a friend. Big surprise." He snapped at Bobby but stopped his pacing when the door opened. Dean looked pale.

"What did he say?" Sam prompted.

"Not much yet." Dean admitted. "But he got attacked in his apartment. He thinks his roommate is dead."

"What?"

"I think …" Dean swallowed visibly. "It sounds like the succubus."

"You sure, son?" Bobby stepped in. "Because that's one hell of a coincidence."

Now Dean glared at him. "I'm not sure. But he says something about a woman and glowing green eyes and he has claw marks on his back."

Bobby's stomach dropped and Sam covered his mouth when the realization of what probably had happened to their friend kicked in.

"Did she …?" Sam started but broke off.

"Don't know yet." Dean's face was the stone mask again. "You two check out the apartment, I'll take care of Nick."

It was obvious that Sam wanted to stay with Dean and Nick but after a long second he turned to the car and jerked his head for Bobby to follow.

They drove in silence. Bobby had questions, a lot of them, but Sam wasn't in the mood to talk.

Sam found the right building and after seeing their FBI badges the landlord, a Mr. Mitchell, let them in.

"Crap." Sam mumbled at the sight of the yellow police tape covering the door to the apartment. "They are quick around here." He said the last part loud enough for the landlord to hear.

"They took the body out, asked me a few questions and that's it." He chewed on the filter of his cigarette. "The police has more important cases than a domestic quarrel gotten out of hand. At least when it comes to these people."

Sam had opened the door and had already ducked under the tape to get in but now his head snapped around to glare at the man. But Sam didn't ask the obvious question.

"What do you mean with _these people_?" Bobby asked and Sam's expression became unreadable.

"Faggots." Mr. Mitchell shrugged and grinned around the destroyed remains of his cigarette. "Oh, I'm sorry. Homosexuals."

Bobby tried to keep this professional while he wanted to wipe that smug grin out of his face.

"Thanks, Mr. Mitchell." He ducked under the tape. "We'll have a quick look around. We may have a few questions later." And before the man could answer Bobby shut the door in his face.

"What an asshole."

Sam had already finished his walk around what seemed to be the living room. Couch and table stood out of place and pieces of the broken TV lay scattered around and there was a puddle of blood on the floor. To Bobby it looked like a struggle and so far he couldn't tell if this was something supernatural or not.

Bobby checked the other rooms. A small kitchen area, a bathroom and two bedrooms.

"Smells like sex in here." Bobby observed. The bed looked well used and there was blood, too. "A lot of sex."

"So it could be the succubus." Sam spoke his first words since the landlord had let them in.

"Your Nick and this Aiden Green." Bobby started. "Were they together?"

"No." Sam answered, short and sure. "They were roommates, friends, nothing more."

Bobby nodded to himself. Two bedrooms and neither bed was big enough to be comfortable for two people.

"Then lets talk to Mr. Mitchell again."

"Why?" Sam hold him back. "We know everything we need to know."

"He may have seen her?" Bobby suggested.

What was with Sam? He wanted to get back to Dean and their friend, Bobby got that, but that doesn't mean they could get sloppy on the job. A job that involved Sam's friend no less.

They didn't have to go looking for Mr. Mitchell, he was hovering right outside the door.

"And you only saw Mr. Perkins leaving." Bobby tried to get the information they needed while Sam kept quiet. "There was nobody else? A woman maybe?"

Now Mr. Mitchell snorted. "Believe me. No woman ever set a foot in that apartment."

"So what makes you think this was a domestic quarrel?" Bobby started walking down the stairs towards the exit. "Could be a breaking and entering as far as I can tell."

"They always denied it but they can't fool me." Mr. Mitchell looked rather proud of himself for figuring that one out. "They were together. Except for, you know, when they were _working_." He even made air quotes for the last word and then waited with a grin for them to ask. But Sam didn't ask.

So Bobby did: "What do you mean with working?"

"Selling their asses to everybody willing to pay." Came the smug answer and out of the corner of his eye Bobby noticed Sam's clenched fist.

However, Mr. Mitchell just continued like the old blabber he was who finally had found a willing audience

"Mr. Perkins." He said the name as if it was something dirty. "Even let his _work_ drive him home this morning. There should be a law against men kissing in public, it was disgusting. Thought they would do it right one the sidewalk." He shuddered theatrically. "I bet that's what they fought about later."

Once again Sam didn't rise to the bait instead he looked close to punching this asshole in the face. Bobby couldn't blame him, he was about to do the same.

"Could you describe the man?" Bobby asked and at the same time Sam said: "Thanks for your time." and tried to drag Bobby away but Mr. Mitchell answered Bobby's question anyway.

"Couldn't really see his face, some guy in a leather jacket. But he drove a nice car, you know, one of those old muscle cars."

They stepped outside and Sam headed for the car but Mr. Mitchell followed them. When he spotted the Impala, his face became slack and his eyes stared into space.

"I broke your toy, Dean Winchester. Now we're even." He said in a hollow voice. For long seconds he didn't move, only stared at the car. When he came to he looked around as if he wasn't sure where he was before he hurried inside, leaving a stunned Bobby behind. Sam had his eyes closed with a defeated expression on his face.

"Okay, safe bet." Bobby opened the passenger door, unwilling to think about the rest just yet. "This is a succubus."

They sat in the car for a moment.

"Bobby, I …" Sam broke off because apparently he didn't know what to say either.

"Let me get this straight." Bobby tried to make sense out of the new information. "This Nick works as a what? Prostitute? And Dean drove him home this morning."

Sam cringed. "It's not like that."

"Than tell me." Bobby demanded. "Because I'm getting some pretty strange ideas here."

Sam didn't answer.

"Look, Sam." Bobby rubbed his beard, trying to think. "Right now it looks to me, like you two let me down because Dean wanted to buy himself a nice piece of ass. And that's not like Dean. So please tell me I'm wrong."

"It's not like that." Sam repeated and let out a deep sigh. When he spoke he didn't look at Bobby. "Yesterday was their first anniversary."


	12. Chapter 12

Ishtar had screwed up. She choked on her own blood, pain ripping through her throat, and decided that she hated gay men.

Okay, she had gotten carried away, just a little bit, and had forgotten to dose him up on time but she had Dean Winchester's precious little fuck toy in hand, so getting a bit excited over that was totally understandable. She hadn't noticed the silver on his bracelet, that was her fault, she should have made sure, but that he'd managed to get that silver into her one weak spot? That wasn't fair, she called bullshit on that one.

The wound in her leg was ripped open again and she still felt the burn of the silver but that wasn't her biggest problem at the moment. There was a goddamn piece of glass stuck in her throat and she couldn't move to get it out.

She heard footsteps coming near and then he stood over her. Nick studied her face, her real face, the ugly one with the scars and the deformations, and for a second she thought he would kill her. But then he just swayed a little bit before he turned and then he left.

She wanted to yell after him but the only sound coming out of her mouth was a wet gargle and hot pain shot through her neck like her head was about to fall off. After the pain eased off a bit the footsteps had disappeared and she was alone.

_Move_ , she encouraged herself. _You gotta move._

Because Dean Winchester's little fuck toy just walked out of the door and the first thing he would do was to call his boyfriend. And than Ishtar had the next hunter on her ass. She needed to move. Now.

Her fingers closed around the glass, finding a good hold, and ripped it out. It came free with a wet sound and fresh blood filled the back of her throat.

_Just a minute_ , her hand fell lifeless to her side. _Just a minute._

She could already feel the wound closing. She had fed, not as much as she would have liked but it had to do, and it was glass and not silver so healing wouldn't be a problem.

Footsteps came near again and for a second she thought Nick was back to finish what he'd begun. Did he know how to kill her? Probably, he was fucking a hunter, no make that two, after all.

But the steps were too heavy for little fuck toy Nicky. They stopped in the door and deep voice said: "What the hell?"

Ishtar froze in shock. It was him. Dean Winchester. He was back to finish what he'd started years ago. Panic raised in her and she fought air in rapid gulps around the blood still pooling in her throat. Close to hyperventilating she screwed her eyes shut and then the footsteps came closer, glass crunching under the shoes.

Suddenly very aware of the fact that she lay helpless and naked in her own blood, Ishtar craned her neck to at least see the man who would kill her.

It wasn't Dean Winchester.

"Oh god." The man kneeling next to her was older and a cigarette hung out of the corner of his mouth and inwardly Ishtar cringed. Why did people do that to themselves? Dimming and tainting their life force like that? They tasted so bitter like that. Ishtar made a face but then forced her features into a smile.

He had reached for her, probably in search for a life sign but stumbled backwards when she moved. She grabbed his wrist and dragged him closer.

"Come here and kiss me _."_

A few minutes later Ishtar stood in the bathroom and washed the worst of the blood off. She added bloody towels to the pile already on the floor and then gathered her things.

"You saw them kissing this morning, didn't you?" She asked her new best friend who had tucked himself back in the meantime and stood now in the middle of the room waiting for her orders.

"That big, black car." He nodded with his cigarette hanging dangerously close to falling from his lips. "That little fucker Nick and another man, couldn't really see his face."

Ishtar stepped closer and whispered in his ear.

_You should call the police, I think this Nick guy has killed his boyfriend. You heard the fight. It got out of control, poor little thing. Don't mention me, I've never been here. I'm your little secret. You can keep as secret, can't you?_

"Yes." He listened intensely, taking in every word.

_Good, I know I can count on you. But if you see that other man or that car again, I have a message for him. Tell him: "I broke your toy, Dean Winchester. Now we're even." Can you do that?_

"Yes."

"Good boy." She patted his cheek and then she hurried to get out of the apartment. It was only a matter of time until Nick would be back with his boyfriends and she preferred to be long gone by then.

Ishtar hitched a ride and didn't care about the direction. Away was all she cared about.

Two days later she had a bag of clothes and some money in her pocket and she hadn't killed anyone for that. With two hunters on her ass, three if she counted Sam Winchester who now apparently never left his brother's side or his bed for that matter, Ishtar was careful.

She only dosed men up with enough of her venom to make them willing to help her but they wouldn't feel more than hung-over when it wore off. Those men tucked at her mind for a day at the most before their presence faded away but she could still feel that Ethan guy, apparently he had survived, and for sure she felt Dean's little fuck toy. She smiled in grim satisfaction knowing that those two still suffered because of her. She didn't really care about Ethan but Nick, yeah, that was fun. Her mark on Ethan was fading slowly, he would be just a distant memory in a day or two, but she had imprinted herself on Nick quite deeply, him she would sense for days.

"Need a ride, Missy?"

Ishtar was at a truck stop where her last ride had dropped her off, after buying her a sandwich and a coffee, and now she was looking for another trucker to take her with him. The man who approached her didn't look like a creep and his smile reached his eyes and he smelled good for a change.

"Sure." She returned his smile and he even carried her bag like a real gentleman.

"I'm Paul, by the way."

He eased the truck back on the highway. For the next hour Ishtar listened to him talking about his wife and two kids, his oldest was in college now, and how he struggled to make enough money for them to get by. He had a warm voice and an enjoyable way to tell his stories so Ishtar just relaxed into her seat and listened to him.

"You know." Paul's tone changed and she zoomed in on him, not quite preying on him but focused. "Hitchhiking is dangerous."

"Please." Ishtar rolled her eyes, was he really going to lecture her about the Stranger Danger crap? She could give him a lesson about that. "I'm a big girl."

"And some psychos out there are big men, just saying." He countered and nodded towards the bag between her feet. "Hope you have some pepper spray or something in there."

"I can take care of myself." And apparently he got the hint and dropped that topic.

"Where are you heading?" He asked instead.

As far away from any hunter as possible, would be the honest answer. Ishtar wasn't even sure where she was right now and she didn't actually care.

"Don't know. Away." She shifted in her seat and looked out of the window. "Just away."

"You're running away from something?" He guessed, leaving her an opening to start talking. She stared out of the window, feeling the growing distance between herself and her marked prey.

"Look, it's none of my business." Paul sounded reasonable. "But from my experience I can tell you that you can only run away for that long. Sooner or later whatever it is will catch up on you. And it tends to bite you in the ass."

Ishtar watched the trees passing by. Run and hide, that's what she did. That's what she had done when Dean Winchester had rammed his silver knife in her face, when he'd cut through skin and flesh and bone. He'd nearly killed her, in fact he'd left her for dead, but she had survived, barely. Instead of hunting him down and killing him while he had been vulnerable, while he'd been suffering from her venom slowly leaving his system, she ran.

"I'm not exactly a fighter." She said. Her strength was the seduction, the subtle way, not the confrontation. She had claws yes, however, they were a last defense at best. Face to face with a hunter? She would never stand a chance.

"But running isn't the solution either." Paul continued. "It's just delaying the unavoidable."

"You got that from a fortune cookie?" Ishtar snorted. For him it was easy. In the harsh light of the day it was clear. She was a monster and if a hunter picked up her trail it came down to run or die.

"I'm just saying." Paul said, ignoring her last comment. "Whatever it is you're running from, maybe you should stop running for a moment and start thinking about a solution."

"Yeah, I might." She looked out of the window again and after a few minutes she pretended to fall asleep.

They parted at another truck stop. Ishtar watched his truck until it disappeared in the distance and then headed for the restroom.

She splashed cold water in her face and just stood there for a moment, fingers clenched around the porcelain rim of the sink and with her head bowed. When she looked up to meet her own eyes in the mirror, it was her real face staring back at her. She hadn't looked at it for years. Not since it had happened. It was worse than she remembered. She had traced the lines of the scars many times but she'd never really looked at herself again after … just after.

The scars were one thing but the knife had damaged the bone as well. A normal wound and it would have healed without leaving a mark. A wound caused by a silver knife? The doctors had tried their best but even they had limits. And Ishtar had to leave the hospital before they could notice her strange healing abilities. They'd saved her right eye, though. It sat lower than her left one now.

"Quasimodo." She spat at herself. Dean Winchester had done this. And what had he lost in return? His little fuck toy was still walking and talking and breathing, though their connection she could feel him fucking breathing. Oh, Dean had gone through a rough time while recovering from her venom and so was is toy but that wasn't permanent. Nothing compared to her own suffering. They both were still out there, they were still pretty.

Ishtar glared at her reflection and the porcelain cracked under her claws. Time to stop running, time to start fighting.

"We are not even."


	13. Chapter 13

Nick hung on to the phone like it was a life-line. First he spoke with Dean and was then handed over to Sam while Dean was driving but he still heard Dean's encouraging words out of the distance from time to time.

Nick didn't say much. He was tired and his body ached and he just wanted to get somewhere warm and save and sleep for a week. He lost track of time but every time Sam asked, he confirmed that he was still there, still awake, still waiting for them. However, it got harder by the minute and in the end he must have fallen asleep because all of a sudden, Dean was there.

Forgetting everything else he flung himself at Dean.

"Dean, you came."

"Of course, we came." He rubbed his back and hushed comforting words into his ear. Sam was there, too, and new tears welled in Nick's eyes.

"Can you walk?" Dean asked. When Nick's legs buckled under him and he whimpered in pain they instantly were at his sides, holding him close.

That was when Nick saw the man who was with Sam and Dean. At first he saw him just long enough to notice that the worn ball cap didn't go well with the suit he was wearing. Then he sat in the passenger seat of Dean's car like he belonged there and Nick just clung tighter to Dean.

"Motel or hospital?" Sam glanced at them through the mirror. "Dean, hospital?"

But that was the last thing Nick wanted. They would ask questions in the hospital. Questions he didn't want to answer to strangers. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to tell Sam and Dean.

"No hospital. Please." He answered before Dean could. They respected his wish without questions and Nick breathed in relief. Then Dean asked what had happened and Nick glanced at the stranger who openly sized him up.

He introduced himself as Bobby, a friend of Sam and Dean, and he was probably the one they had wanted to meet earlier but that didn't make him less a stranger. Pondering over that stranger kept Nick's mind busy and before he knew it Sam had parked the car in front of their motel and went to get them a room.

"We can talk inside." Sam said before he left the car. It sounded like a threat. Nick didn't want to talk about anything. He just wanted to forget. He wanted to sleep it off and never think about it ever again.

Somehow he ended up with Dean in the room alone.

"Two beds?" Nick asked when Dean helped him to sit down on one. Moving around had stirred up the pain in his lower regions.

"Bobby doesn't know." Dean knelt between Nick's legs. "Nick, can you tell me what happened?"

He fell forward, clinging to Dean again, who had to fight for his balance with his hands full of Nick.

"You can tell me. I'm here." Dean soothed him. "Something happened with a customer?"

Nick shook his head, face buried at Dean's neck.

"There was this woman." He reluctantly started, hiccuping with tears again. "She killed Aiden."

Dean's hands rubbed circles on his back but then he hit a tender spot and Nick hissed in pain.

"Nick, are you hurt?" Dean was already lifting his shirt, all gentle movements but Nick stiffened under his touch. "It's okay, I'm here. Just a quick look, I'm not going to touch you."

Nick nodded again and Dean glanced at his lower back where she had held him down while she … he didn't want to go there.

"Nick, what happened?" Dean sat next to him and when he smoothed the shirt back down, Nick breathed easier.

"She …" He started but he couldn't say it. How could he put something like this in words?

"Shh." Dean made, holding him in his arms and rocking him like he was a child. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But can you tell me about her? What did she look like?"

"Her eyes glowed green." Nick answered because that was a safe answer, insane maybe but safe. The second he'd said it he realized how insane it really sounded and sure enough, Dean's face hardened.

"Nick, could you wait here for a second?" Dean retreated from him and Nick let him go. "I have to tell Sam something but I'll be back in a second. Okay? I'll be right outside the door."

"Okay." Nick whispered. Dean slipped outside and Nick waited for the sound of his car coming to life. He was dirty now, a broken little toy, and he was talking nonsense. Of course Dean would want to get way from him.

To his surprise Dean came back in a few seconds later.

"Sam and Bobby are going to check your place. See what happened there." Dean informed him and sat down next to him on the bed. Nick snuggled closer, breathing in his scent. When Dean slung his arm around his shoulder Nick tensed for a second but then relaxed into the touch. This was Dean. Not her.

"You said you saw her eyes glowing." Dean started.

"Must have been a trick of the light." Nick tried to downplay it but Dean shook his head.

"Or not. There are some weird things out there. You're not crazy." His grip around Nick's shoulder tightened. "If they did glow, I think I know what happened to you. Did she kiss you?"

Nick swallowed against the lump in his throat. He couldn't tell Dean. If he told him, then Dean would know. Dean would know, how broken and sick he was. That he hadn't said _no_ even if he'd wanted to. That he'd said _please_ and that he'd begged for it.

"Nick, did she kiss you?" Dean repeated his question, still in a low voice, still gentle.

Nick nodded into his shoulder.

"She kissed you and then you wanted her."

"I didn't …" But he couldn't finish the sentence. Because Dean was right, he had wanted her.

"I know you didn't." Dean reassured him and he sounded like he really knew. "You didn't want it but suddenly you needed it, right?"

Another nod.

"It happened to me once, too." Dean admitted. "I know what it's like, what it feels like."

"She said she knows you." He whispered.

"She what?"

Nick flinched under the sudden outburst. Immediately Dean lowered his voice again.

"Look, I met one of those bitches once." He growled and suddenly Nick thought about the morning an eternity ago. Had that really been this morning when he'd given Dean a blowjob to calm down? "And I killed her. Or I thought I did."

"She knew your name." Nick continued, glad that the topic had switched from him to Dean. "And she asked about your brother. Sam."

"That bitch." Dean shifted a little bit, his arm dropped from Nick's shoulder and suddenly there was too much space between them. "I'm sorry, we should have told you. It's okay if you …"

"Please." Nick couldn't help the word escaping his lips and he hated how needy he sounded, just like … then. He reached for Dean. "I don't care if you're brothers or whatever, just, please, don't leave me."

"I'm here." The arm was back around his shoulder. "Not leaving."

They sat in silence for a moment before Dean cleared his throat.

"She's left some marks on your back, we should do something about that. Are you hurt anywhere else?"

Nick didn't answer.

"Nick?" Dean sighed. "Look man, I don't know the details or how you managed to get way from her, which by itself is pretty awesome by the way, but I know what those bitches usually do. I just need to make sure you don't have any other injuries."

It was oddly comforting that Dean already knew, or thought he knew, because then Nick didn't have to talk about it. Dean was right with the injuries part, though.

"I think she didn't like my bracelet." He held it up for Dean to see.

"You got her with the silver." Dean's eyes went wide with what Nick hoped was pride. "That's my boy."

But there was still an unanswered question in the room.

"Chopsticks." Nick whispered, kneading his hands in his lap. Dean didn't say anything, just hold him tight and waited for an explanation. "She … ehm … used chopsticks." Nick continued when Dean didn't seem to get it. "But I think it stopped bleeding."

He added the last part as an afterthought because the last thing he wanted was for Dean to check him for injuries _there_. The thought of getting it checked out in a hospital was worse but not by much.

"Nick." His voice trembled and tears fell openly from Dean's eyes. "I'm sorry."

Dean didn't say anything for a moment and the tension melted out of Nick enough for him to relax into his side again. He was so tired.

"Think you can manage a shower?"

Oh god, a shower sounded awesome, her scent still lingered on his skin, in his clothes, and he wanted nothing more than to scrub every memory of her off his skin. But a shower meant moving and Nick wasn't sure if he was up for that.

"Okay, let's do this." Dean stood up and urged him up with him.

They had showered together, all three of them, many times before but the thought alone of Dean helping him now brought the panic back.

Nick fought against Dean's hold and tumbled backwards on the bed.

"No, please. No." His breath hitched and everything disappeared in a fog of panic. He fought blindly, tried to get away.

"Shh, it's okay." Dean hushed him but didn't touch him. "Okay. This is the plan. I help you over to the bathroom and you do the rest alone. When you're done, you holler and I help you back and take care of your injuries. By then Sam should be back and you can have some of my clean clothes. Is that okay?" He nearly pleaded. "Can you do that?"

Nick wasn't so sure about the injury part or if he could stand long enough to take a shower on his own but he gave Dean a nod.

The shower sucked the last bit of energy he'd left out of him but it felt awesome. Leaning heavily on Dean he made his way back to the bed, his hand an iron fist holding a towel around his waist. He'd never felt so naked, so vulnerable in his life.

"Lay down on your stomach." Dean directed him to the bed where he took care of the marks on Nick's back. Nick clawed into the sheets and bit his lip to hold back the whimpers. Dean's fingers were gentle on him and Nick knew he could trust Dean but still. He lay stiff as a board and just prayed for it to be over.

"Nothing too bad." Dean reassured him while he put the last band-aid on a small cut. His hand rested on the low of Nick's back, just above the towel. "Nick, I have to have a look, you know that, right?"

Nick knew that. At least they had to find out if this was hospital worthy or not. He still didn't like it.

"Okay." He closed his eyes and hold his breath until it was over.

Dean's touch had never before felt so clinical. He talked him through every step but Nick still flinched when Dean put ointment on his most private part.

"You are a bit torn." Dean threw the blanket over him and Nick let out a breath. "But it doesn't look too bad."

Dean left to wash his hands which was enough to raise Nick's panic again. Which was ridiculous, he knew that, however, as soon as Dean was out of his line of sight, cold fear stole his breath.

"Nick, breathe." Dean was at his side in a heartbeat. "It's okay, I'm here."

With Dean's hand warm and comforting between his shoulder blades Nick drifted off to sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

Nick came out of his dead-like sleep flailing. For a second he didn't know where he was or who the person touching his shoulder was, he only knew that he had to get away.

"Nick, it's me." Dean stepped back, giving him time and space to come around. Confused Nick looked around the motel room and found Dean right next to him and Sam standing at the door, a bundle of clothes in his hands and a sad expression on his face.

_Feeling sorry for poor little Nicky_ , Nick thought bitterly.

"I got you some clothes." Sam awkwardly put the bundle down on the spare bed and then had no idea what to do with his hands. "I'll wait outside, then."

Nick breathed in relief when the door fell shut behind him and at the same time he felt guilty but he was still too tired to figure out his emotions.

"I know you're tired like hell." Dean sat on the edge of Nick's bed and unconsciously Nick reached out to touch his knee. "But we have to talk and we're on a tight schedule."

Nick tried to draw his hand back but Dean caught it and hold it on his knee.

"You don't have to say anything if you don't want to." With that Dean took away Nick's biggest fear. "I'll do the talking. There are some things you need to know and I think we'll both feel more comfortable if you're dressed for this." Dean tried a smile and retreated to the bathroom to give Nick some privacy. It felt wrong, they used to run around each other naked all day, to feel that uncomfortable around the man he loved and he loved Dean even more for doing all this for him.

"Okay, this might sound crazy but hear me out, please." Dean started. They sat on the bed again, shoulder to shoulder.

"Crazier than glowing eyes?"

"Maybe." Dean took a deep breath. "The woman who attacked you isn't human. She's a succubus."

"You're right that sounds crazy." Nick said but was willing to listen.

"They have venom in their saliva." Dean continued. "Basically, they kiss a man and he becomes theirs, willing and all horny for them."

That sounded familiar.

"They feed off a man's life force. These succubitches make you come over and over again and suck your energy right through your dick." Dean swallowed thickly, caught in memories. Forgetting his own nightmares for a second Nick drew him close and brushed a kiss on his lips. Just a chaste little gesture of comfort.

"It's over now." He mumbled in Dean's ear, not sure if he meant Dean or himself.

"It's not." Dean blinked against tears and at his side Nick froze. "The venom they use, it's not only for making you horny. They can feed off a man for weeks and it's the venom that binds them to the succubus. If you don't get your fix on time, it get's nasty."

Nick wanted to tell him that he was crazy but this explained a few things. And he knew Dean, trusted him completely. Dean would never fuck with him like this, hurting him farther after what had happened to him. No way.

"Am I going to die?"

"No!" Dean drew him closer into his arms and Nick fell willingly into the hug. "But you'll wish you would."

Dean told him what to expect. Nick didn't want to believe him but he did.

"I'll be with you all the time." Dean promised. "Bobby offered his place, you can ride it out there more comfortably."

Which Nick translated to _You can scream our head off without anybody hearing_.

"But it's a few hours ride and we don't have much time until the venom kicks in." Dean stood up and hold his hand out. "You're strong, you can do this."

Nick wasn't so sure about that but he took Dean's hand.

"Is Sam coming with us?" It didn't feel right with only Dean around.

"No, he and Bobby will stay here and search for that succubus." Dean hesitated. "Nick, I know this is really bad timing but Bobby … he's like a father to Sam and me."

"You don't want him to find out about us." Nick guessed. He understood. He had never known them as anything but lovers, them also being brothers was just another piece of information, interesting but not important. They were consenting adults, so why not? But to somebody who had seen them growing up as brothers? That was a totally different thing.

Now Dean grinned sheepishly.

"He already found some things out and apparently my little brother just dragged me out of the closet. As far as it concerns Bobby it's a me and you only thing. Could you do that?" Dean looked at him like a condemned man waiting for the ax to fall. And still, Nick knew even if he dropped this bomb to that Bobby guy, Dean would be there for him. Dean wouldn't leave him. And Sam too.

"Okay." Nick tightened his grip around Dean's hand and together they stepped outside to face Sam and Bobby.

"I got my stuff out of the trunk, Dean." Sam informed him. "You two better get going before …" He trailed off. This wasn't something like getting home before rush hour.

Sam hesitated for a second but then he had Nick in a bear hug and whispered "I love you." only for Nick to hear.

"Me too." Nick mumbled into his chest.

Dean and Bobby exchanged a few words with Bobby trying really hard to not stare at Nick and then they were in the car and on the road. Nick watched Sam and Bobby through the mirror and only then it dawned to him that they both stayed back to find _her_. Which meant they knew about her, which meant they knew what she'd done to him.

Nick could deal with Sam knowing, barely, but a stranger? Oh god.

"Nick, you okay?" Panic pitched Dean's voice and Nick forced his breathing down to something almost normal.

"I'm good." It was a lie, they both knew that, but they went with it. Dean steered one-handed, his other hand never leaving Nick's knee and Nick placed his hand on top, needing the contact.

"I've never been the holding hands type." He laughed a humorless laugh, it sounded hollow in his ears.

"Me neither." Dean entwined their fingers. "You can sleep if you want."

Nick let his head fall against the window. He was tired and sore and every little bump in the road reminded him of his injuries, but his eyes stayed open, watching the landscape passing by without really seeing it.

Dean stopped for food. They ate in the car and parked only long enough for Dean to inhale his burger which he forced down with grim determination.

On the road again Nick chewed on some fries and hadn't touched his burger at all.

"You need to eat something." Dean reminded him. "You've lost a lot of energy."

Nick knew that. Beside what she'd done to him, he'd upchucked his breakfast which left their anniversary steak as his last meal. That had been nearly twenty-four hours ago. And if Dean was right, and Nick believed him, then he would need as much energy as he could master to go through what the venom would do to him. But knowing that didn't change the fact that the fries tasted like Styrofoam and the few he had forced down lay in his stomach like rocks. He threw his nearly untouched food in the back seat.

"Could you turn the heating down?" Nick wiped beats of sweat from his brow.

Dean threw him a look but turned it down.

"Is it starting?" Nick asked.

"We still have time." Dean reassured him but put his foot down on the accelerator.

Nick rested his head against the cool glass of the window. He counted trees and didn't think about her. Didn't think about how good she'd felt around him, how right it had felt to hold her in his arms, how perfectly they had fit together. And for sure he didn't wonder where she was right now.

He readjusted himself in his pants, hoping Dean wouldn't notice. Of course he noticed.

"You still good?"

"Yeah, I'm good." And he was. Kind of. Okay, he had a hard-on and his body felt too warm and he was sweating but mostly he was fine.

He wasn't fine anymore five minutes later. By then he was openly palming himself through his pants, beyond caring if Dean noticed or not.

Dean stopped the car.

"Take it out." Dean turned in his seat, facing Nick. "It takes the edge off if you come. At least for a little while."

Nick had never been shy around Dean but now he hesitated.

"Nick, please." Dean squeezed his hand.

With burning cheeks Nick opened his fly and his dick sprung free. He felt Dean's eyes on him when he wrapped his hand around himself and started stroking. It felt good.

A moan escaped his lips and he picked up the pace, fisting his cock as if his life depended on it. A few strokes and he was close. Chasing after his orgasm Nick twisted his wrist in the upstroke just so but this time it didn't do the trick. It was good but it was not enough.

"Let me help you." Dean said which startled Nick. He had completely forgotten that he wasn't alone.

Nick let go of his arching cock and whined at the loss because not enough was better than nothing but then Dean's hand closed around him and made it all better.

Seconds later he came all over Dean's hand and a distant part of his brain wondered how his body had produced that much sperm in the short time since … her.

They didn't say anything, there was nothing to say.

Dean wiped his hand with a tissue and then they were moving again. Nick sat sagged down in his seat, seeing more sky than anything else through the windshield, and pondered if he should bother with tucking himself back in or not. He already could go for a second round.

"How do your feel?" Dean asked.

"Horny." He did tuck himself back in, hard and aching but bearable for now, because he had enough sense left to realize that they were still on an open road. The way Dean drove it wasn't unlikely to get pulled over and things were complicated enough already.

Nick took a deep breath. He smelled sweat and sex but more prominent he smelled Dean.

"How long?"

"Half an hour."

"We might have to do this again before we're there." Nick said in a low voice, hating how his cock pressed against the zipper, how his mind wandered back to her.

New tears welled in his eyes. "This is not fair."

"No, it isn't." Dean took his hand again. "You're scared, I know that, but that's okay. It's going to be okay."

"You don't understand." Nick sniffed not sure if he understood. "What she did … and now this … I can't …"

Dean didn't say anything for a long moment before he let out a shaky breath.

"When she had me." Dean finally said and the words didn't come easy. "She took control. She was in charge and I was happy with that, I _wanted_ her to tell me what to do, how to please her." He swallowed and blinked rapidly. "It was more luck than anything that I got her with my knife but all of a sudden I was in control again. I not her. And then the venom took it away again." Dean's voice broke.

That sounded way too familiar, it was like Dean was telling Nick's story and not his own and oddly enough Nick drew comfort out of that. Dean had been in the same situation. Dean knew, Dean understood. And Dean had lived through it.

"You'll be there with me, right?" Nick asked while his hand that wasn't holding Dean sneaked back to his groin.

"All the way."


	15. Chapter 15

_Why didn't he tell me?_ That was the question circling in Bobby's mind on the short drive back to the motel. Back to Dean and his boyfriend.

Sam wouldn't give him an answer to that one, he didn't even try, and the answers Bobby came up with on his own … were unsettling.

_Because he doesn't trust you_ , was the most obvious one. Was Dean afraid of how Bobby might react?

All Bobby ever wanted was for them to be happy. Sam had found his Jess and as horrible as it had ended Bobby was glad that Sam had found her, that Sam had been happy with her even if it had been only for a short time.

For Dean Bobby had always hoped that he would get past that skirt chasing one night stand phase and would find someone special. Living a hunter's life that wasn't likely, Bobby knew that, but he could still hope, right? Apparently Dean had found his someone special a year ago, though.

Okay, Bobby had to admit that it was a surprise that this someone was a man. As far as he knew Dean had never shown any interest in somebody without lady parts but if he was honest, he only got glimpses of the boys' lives. Sad but true.

Glancing at Sam he wondered for how long he'd know about his brother's interest in men.

"You know he could have told me."

"It's not that easy." Sam kept his eyes on the traffic, avoiding to meet Bobby's.

"Just in case you haven't figured it out yourself by now." Bobby sighed. "It's okay. I'm happy he has somebody and I don't care if it's a man or a woman as long as Dean is happy."

"Thanks, Bobby." Sam gave him a smile which Bobby couldn't quite make sense of.

"At least Nick has Dean to help him through this." Bobby continued. "You know he's most likely poisoned by the succubus' venom."

"I know." Sam's face was unreadable. They reached the motel and Sam hadn't even shut the engine down when Dean came out of the door.

"How is he?" Was Sam's first question.

"Sleeping." Dean leaned against the car as if he needed something to hold him upright.

"Sammy, I screwed up."

Sam reached for his brother but let his hand drop back to his side when Bobby came around the car.

Dean straightened like a soldier ready to rapport and not for the first Bobby wished John was still alive so he could kick his ass.

"I thought I killed her but apparently she's still around." Dean rubbed his mouth. "And she took it out on Nick."

"I know." Sam sneaked a little closer, comforting his brother by just being there. "She left you a message. That now you're even."

"Dammit." He slammed his fist on the roof of his car with a lout bang. "I should have made sure."

"Cut it, boy." Bobby stepped in. "She had you in her claws for a while before you got the drop on her. You were high on her poison and you still got her good enough to think she was gone for good. This is not your fault, Dean." It had to be said but Bobby was pretty sure that Dean would beat himself up over this anyway. "The clock's ticking, I'd say you get your boyfriend over to my place before it gets bad."

"My what?" Dean flinched back as if Bobby had slapped him in the face. "Sam?"

"Dude, I had to tell him something." Sam hold his hands up in defense. "The landlord saw you and Nick this morning."

"Nick was right, he is a douchebag." Dean scratched the back of his head and looked everywhere but Bobby.

"Congrats to your anniversary, by the way." Bobby said and he could only hope that Dean got the message behind his rough tone. "And for sure you owe me an explanation for why you didn't feel like you could tell me."

"Bobby, I …" Dean started but Bobby cut him off.

"But for now let's focus on Nick." He continued. "You know what he's been through and what's coming. Get him over to my place, it's safe and comfortable there."

Both Winchesters stared at him in awe.

"What?" Bobby adjusted his cap. "You thought I'd kick you out or something? You should know me better than that."

"Thanks, Bobby." Dean's voice was thick with emotions.

The brothers exchanged one of their looks and this one seemed to be a let's-roll-with-it-one. A minute later they had a plan. Dean would take Nick to Bobby's while Sam and Bobby stayed back to find the succubus. It was more to give Dean and Nick some privacy than anything else, they all knew that, but nobody pointed it out.

"Idjits." Bobby muttered under his breath when he watched Sam with a bundle of clothes for Nick following Dean inside. Sam was back outside almost immediately and went straight for the trunk to get his own stuff.

When Dean and Nick came out not long after that, Bobby tried to not stare at him. Sure, he was curious to find out more about the man Dean had been with for a year now but this was also the man who had been raped by a supernatural monster only hours ago. Nick moved like he was in pain and he stayed close to Dean, avoiding Bobby completely, but seemed to be comfortable with the crushing bear hug Sam gave him.

"Drive fast, Dean." Bobby patted his shoulder. "You can stay at my place as long as you want. My door is always open for you, you know that. And for Nick, too."

Dean didn't say anything but he didn't have to, it was all there in his eyes. He nodded and then hurried to get on the road.

Bobby and Sam waited until they were out of sight before they turned and headed inside.

"Which bed do you want?" Bobby asked because he didn't know what else to say. Sam dropped his bag on the one in the back, the one Nick had obviously napped in, and so that was settled.

"We should talk to the police, find out what the official version of this is." Sam said and started rummaging in his bag. "See if they have any leads."

"Sam, stop it." Bobby had to raise his voice to get through to Sam. "It's getting late. We should find something to eat, get some sleep and talk to the police first thing in the morning."

Sam stared at him, jaw twitching and a haunted look in his eyes but then he gave in.

"You're right." He threw his suit pants back in his bag and collapsed next to it on the bed. "It's just …"

Bobby sat down on his own bed. "I know."

The look Sam gave him clearly said that Sam didn't think Bobby knew shit but Bobby chose to ignore it.

"Pizza or Chinese?" Bobby asked instead. "Your choice, I'm buying."

Sam hit the shower while they waited for the pizza, more to avoid him than anything else, Bobby guessed. However, that gave Bobby some time to clear his head as well.

There were so many questions he wanted to ask, most of them he should probably direct at Dean and not Sam, but Sam was here and they had an evening to kill and everything that helped to take their minds off what Nick was enduring was welcomed.

Usually how they had met the first time was a good opener but given Nick's profession, Bobby doubted he should start with that.

Dean had never been as guarded about his sex life as he was about other things, so Bobby knew a few things. For example that Dean wasn't a stranger to prostitutes but that most of the time he didn't have or want to rely on that option if he was in the mood for sex. He liked the hunt.

And at the same time Dean had managed to leave out such a huge part about himself. Hell, yesterday Bobby would have laughed at anybody suggesting Dean was anything but straight as a stick.

"This Nick." Bobby started when they sat down with their pizza. "What's he like?"

Sam took his time to chew thoroughly before he answered.

"He's great." He chose his words carefully. "He has humor, he's loyal and caring. He's good for Dean. For us."

"You like him?" Of course he did. Bobby hadn't seen much interaction between those two but what he'd seen was enough. The way Sam had tried to shield the truth from Bobby spoke for itself.

"Yeah, I do." Sam answered with a wistful smile and that told Bobby more than words could ever bring across. The brothers rarely split up so Sam had most likely been with Dean every time he came here to visit his boyfriend. Bobby could easily picture all three of them having dinner or hanging out at a bar, Dean wouldn't cut his brother out just because he was with someone. Dean liked his family around which brought Bobby back to the question why Dean hadn't told him. Bobby considered himself family but maybe Dean didn't?

They ate in silence for a while and then they sat back with a healthy shot of Bobby's Jack Daniels. They needed it.

"You're really okay with this?" Sam had a question of his own. He tried to sound casual but failed miserably.

"Why shouldn't I?" Bobby wracked his brain if he'd ever said or did something that could have led them to the conclusion that he was against this kind of relationship.

Hunters lived a short and lonely life, they should consider love as a rare gift no matter if it came from a man or a woman.

Bobby chased the thought of Karen that was suddenly in his mind away with the rest of his drink.

"Don't know." Sam put his glass on the table and leaned back with a sigh. "Dean tries hard to keep his womanizer image intact, this must be quite a surprise for you."

"Believe me, it is." Bobby poured them a second shot.

"And you know what Nick does for a living." Sam added.

Yeah, that was another point. Bobby hmmed and nipped at his drink.

"Is Dean okay with that?" Because that was the important point here. He thought about all the women Dean had bragged about over the last year, trying to remember if Dean had actually mentioned more than flirting. He didn't think so. Bobby could imagine a lot of things but if Dean was going steady with someone, he couldn't picture him keeping up his one night stand routine at the side. Not Dean.

Nick on the other hand had apparently kept _working._ But he had to live from something, Bobby got that.

"It's not that he didn't know from the beginning." Sam confirmed Bobby's suspicion. So it had started with Dean paying. "Dean knows the difference between love and sex."

"Did Nick know about what Dean does?"

"Not until today."

They finished their drinks and turned on the TV because neither of them was ready for bed just yet. Judging by the way Sam kept glancing at his phone Bobby wasn't the only one wondering how Nick was doing.

Not good, was the most likely answer to that one but there was nothing they could do.

All they could do was to get some sleep and to find that succubus bitch in the morning.

They stayed up late that night, watching TV without really watching it. When they finally settled in for the night Bobby stared into the darkness for a long time, thoughts running through his head, keeping him awake. He tried to keep the images of what Dean and Nick were probably doing right now out of his mind and at the same time he felt sorry for what the young man had to suffer through. At least he had Dean to help him.

Sam's breathing didn't sound like he was sleeping either.


	16. Chapter 16

They didn't stop for a second handjob but by the time they reached their destination Nick was sprawled all over Dean, sucking and biting his neck while he humped his leg.

"Dean, please." He murmured into his skin. "I need it, please."

"We're here." Dean pried Nick's hands off with quite some difficulty. "Let's get inside. There's a bed, sounds good? Better than in the car, right?"

Nick tried to hold him back but Dean slipped out of the car and Nick howled out his frustration. He needed him. Now.

When Dean opened the passenger side door, Nick was on him again in a heartbeat, smashing their lips together, his tongue forcing its way into Dean's mouth, exploring, claiming. His hands were all over Dean, he wanted to touch him everywhere. Slipping them under his shirt, Nick explored the well-defined chest, brushed with his thumbs over the nipples and stroke along the sides down till he reached the waistband of Dean's jeans.

He caught Dean's leg between his and rubbed off against it. Friction was good, Nick hummed with pleasure at the feeling of rough fabric on the tender flesh of his cock.

"Nick." Dean dragged him towards the house. "C'mon, inside."

"Want you." Nick sneaked his hand down into Dean's pants tucked at his flaccid cock. "Need you. Wanna fuck you." His other hand found Dean's ass and gave it a squeeze.

Dean fumbled with the key but then they were inside and Dean switched on the lights.

"Upstairs." He tried to guide him up the stairs but Nick couldn't wait that long. He needed Dean under him now. They passed a room that looked like a study with a nice desk.

Nick changed direction while he worked on opening Dean's fly.

"Okay, that'll work, too." Dean mumbled when he realized where the journey was going. "Just give me a second."

Nick didn't have a second. He yanked Dean's pants down and bent him over the desk, holding him down with one hand on his neck while he fumbled with the other one to get his aching cock out.

"Just …" Dean squirmed under him to get something out of his pocket. He came up with a tube of lube.

Lube was good, Nick hadn't thought about that. Lube was better than spit.

"Hurry." Nick pushed, this took way too long. "Wanna fuck you. Gonna fuck you so good."

"Whatever you say." Dean shook his legs to get his pants farther down so he could spread his legs a little bit wider and then he reached back to smear lube between his ass cheeks. He squeezed another glob on his fingers and grabbed Nick's cock.

Nick hissed at the sudden cold but there was Dean's hand too, stroking him, and that felt good but it was not enough.

Done with the foreplay Nick lined up and then smashed their hips together, sinking into Dean's heat in one hard thrust.

"Fuck!" Dean tensed under him and struggled and that even felt better. This was what he needed, Dean hot and tight around him. Nick bottomed out and pushed back in, immediately setting a brutal pace. Books and papers were wiped from the plate, the desk rocking with every thrust.

It didn't take long for Nick to come. He came balls-deep in Dean, his cock jerking and twitching with every wave of his orgasm rippling through him and for a second it was amazing, exactly what he needed.

But his cock was still painfully hard, still aching for more. This was good but not quite right, it could be better, it could be perfect. Maybe if he thrust harder, deeper.

Nick twisted Dean's arms behind his back, holding them there in an iron grip, and used that as leverage for a new angle. Dean had to bow his back, strained muscles stood out under his sweat soaked shirt, while Nick snapped his hips, pistoning in and out.

Dean's grunts of pain overlapped with his own of frustration. This was still not right. Nick worked himself to his next orgasm because that was the only way to go.

He screamed out his climax mixed with frustration and raw need.

"Please." He cried and collapsed on the floor. "I need it, please."

"Shh." Dean whispered in his ear. "It's alright."

Gentle hands urged him out of his clothes but every little brush of skin on skin sent shivers of need through him. Then Dean's hand was on his cock again, working him in long, even strokes, and even if it was far from what he really needed it was enough to ground Nick for a moment.

"Let's take a cold shower." Dean helped him to stand up. "It helps."

Nick didn't want to shower but Dean had his hand on his cock and Nick followed him like a dog on a leash. At some point Dean had lost his clothes, too, and now Nick had a great view on his ass. Muscles flexed with every step and come dripped out of his hole, making its way slowly down his inner thigh.

Nick licked his lips and wanted nothing more than to fuck Dean against the next wall. So he did. He slammed Dean against the nearest spot of unfurnished wall, not minding the little desk with the vase on top he tipped over in the process.

"Dammit, Nick." Dean hissed but didn't fight him when Nick kicked his legs farther apart. Chest and cheek pressed at the wall Dean looked gorgeous, Nick couldn't get his hands off him.

"You're pretty." Nick mouthed along his neck, tasting him. "And you taste good, too."

Then he bit down hard while he slammed back home into that already well used hole.

Dean bit back a scream.

It took Nick longer to climax now. He grabbed Dean's hips bruisingly hard and rammed into him. This time he must have hit his prostate just right because Dean now moaned more because of pleasure than pain. When Dean came, he took Nick with him over the edge. It felt even less right than before.

"C'mon, shower." Dean turned and Nick's still hard cock slipped out of him.

For the moment exhausted Nick followed Dean to the bathroom. The shower was small, not really big enough for two grown men, but Nick didn't want Dean to be more than an inch away from him anyway.

The cold water did help. For a while they stood in a tight embrace, Nick's stubbornly hard cock trapped between their bodies and Nick cried into the crook of Dean's neck with whispered words of reassurance in his ear.

They ended with Dean's back plastered against the tiles, his right leg bent over Nick's arm and Nick fucking him merciless while ice-cold water splashed over both of them, muffling their cries.

When Nick was done for the moment, Dean dried both of them off and they even reached the bedroom without incidents.

Nick immediately tried to push Dean on the bed but Dean manhandled him to sit on the edge while he knelt between Nick's legs.

"Can we give my ass a pause?" Dean asked with a forced smile. Before Nick could protest Dean had his fingers curled around the base of Nick's erection and the tip of his tongue circled the dark head. The stupid thing was constantly leaking precome but Dean didn't seem to mind.

Nick whimpered in need but leaned back a little and fisted the sheets in a white knuckled grip to anchor himself.

Dean's talented tongue and mouth on him turned him into a bubbling mess and it didn't take long for him to come in Dean's mouth. Bobbing up and down his length Dean worked him through the jerks.

"There you go." Dean kept jacking him while he sat back on his heels and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

Nick needed more. Driven by raw need he stood up and grabbed Dean's head with both hands, fingers digging into his scalp, holding him in place, and then he forced his way back into the wet silky heat of his mouth.

Dean took a surprised breath with his nostrils wide but after a second he relaxed his jaw and gave no more resistance.

Nick fucked his face. Dean choked and gagged around Nick abusing his mouth which made the muscles of his throat flutter, giving Nick that special little extra. It still didn't feel quite right but this was closer than before. It didn't take long for Nick to come deep in Dean's throat.

Coughing and spitting Dean landed on the floor and for a second Nick managed to surface from the fog of need.

"Dean, you okay?"

"It's okay, Nick." He sounded hoarse and a mixture of spit and come was smeared around his mouth. With his thumb Nick wiped the mess from Dean's lips and then he helped him to get on the bed.

Lying next to each other they even found a minute to relax.

"I'm sorry, Dean." He could feel the need rushing back like a huge wave ready to take him under.

"Not your fault." Dean kissed him, sweet and tender. Then the need was back and everything melted into one growing spiral of need and more and not right.

Nick bent Dean in half and fucked him on the bed. He thought, they stayed in bed for a while but later he wasn't sure anymore. He remembered another cold shower or two and fucking Dean bent over the bathtub. They did it on a couch, on the floor and on every vertical surface in the house and against most of the horizontal ones as well. At some point it wasn't about getting off or doing it right anymore, at some point it was just fucking against the growing pain.

When he came to for real the next time, Nick sat on the bathroom floor between Dean's outstretched legs. Leaning against the bathtub Dean held Nick's head with one hand so it rested at his shoulder while he jacked Nick with the other one. His movement was sluggish and weak but he kept going.

"Please, stop." Nick whimpered in pain. His cock felt like it had been skinned alive and what he saw of it under Dean's hand looked red and raw.

"Please, Dean. It's too much. Stop, please. Red, Dean, red. Please, red. Red." He mumbled his safe-word which he'd never used before. Never had to use before. But now it was too much. He couldn't stand it anymore, he couldn't.

He squirmed weakly and Dean let go of his cock, his hand falling lifelessly to his side. Instantly the pain turned to hot agony. Every nerve was on fire, acid eating through his groin and his skin felt so tight and hot, it had to blister and crack.

Nick screamed.

Then Dean's hand was back and the pain became almost bearable again. Nick sobbed in relief. But it was short-lived. The pain was still more than he could stand and he already fought his way out of Dean's hold again.

"Make it stop. Please make it stop." He rolled his head to look up at Dean. Their eyes met for a second, Dean's dark and hollow and his face was coated with traces spit and come and tears. Dean stroke Nick's cheek and rested his chin on his head while his other hand mechanically worked Nick's still erected cock.

"Make it stop." Nick begged. "Please, just make it stop."

"Shh." Dean made, his voice almost gone. "It's okay, I got you." The words a meaningless slur, a litany repeated over and over again.

Nick reached for Dean's hand on his face and slowly dragged it farther down. They both were trembling from exhaustion and Nick had no strength left but he still managed to place Dean's hand on his throat and to bent the fingers to close them with the palm resting on his bobbing Adam's apple. Nick felt the slight resistance when he swallowed.

"Make it stop. Please."


	17. Chapter 17

Dean didn't choke Nick to death. Instead he slung his arm around Nick until his hand was on Nick's shoulder and Nick's chin rested on Dean's elbow.

_More leverage,_ Nick thought. _Good. Break my neck? Please?_

He wasn't sure if those words left his lips or not, if he had words left besides _please_ and _stop_ but then the pain overrode every other thought.

His screams echoed from the walls of the bathroom but after a while it became a distant sound, no longer connected to him.

When Nick woke up the next time, he lay in a bed. It was warm and clean and Nick only smelled fresh sheets with a hint of lavender. His body felt like it was made out of lead and he was too tired to even try moving, however, the dull ache in his muscles told him that moving would be a bad idea anyway.

Ever so slowly, letting gravity do most of the work, he rolled his head to the side to have a look at his surroundings. Bright sunlight flooded the two bed bedroom but the other bed was empty.

Where was Dean? And where was here anyway? Nick didn't recognize the room.

Nick tried to call out for Dean but all he could manage was an almost soundless croak. He didn't even have enough saliva to unstuck his swollen tongue from the roof of his mouth. His throat felt like it had been sliced open and there was the metallic tang of blood in the back of his mouth.

Nick closed his eyes and gave in to exhaustion but now he'd realized how dry his mouth was, the thirst was there. His body begged for a drop of water but he couldn't even master the energy to lift his head.

Footsteps on creaking wood, maybe stairs, came closer and the breath hitched in Nick's throat. It was her. She was coming for him and he couldn't do more than blink sluggishly at the door. He tried to struggle free from under the covers, abused muscles screaming and spasming at that attempt, and then the footsteps stopped right outside the door.

Lips forming a silent _no_ he watched in horror as the door swung open.

It wasn't her. Relief washed over him. Not her.

"Morning, sunshine." Dean said and his voice cracked but he smiled at Nick. Slowly he made his way through the room, stiffly, like every step cost almost more energy than he could master. But Nick didn't have eyes for him, his eyes were fixed on the tray Dean set carefully on the bedside table.

A glass of water, a pitcher with what looked like apple juice and a steaming mug that smelled delicious.

With a sigh Dean sat down at the edge of the bed, shifted slightly until he'd found a good position, and then, finally he reached for the glass of water.

"Bet you're thirsty."

Nick managed a nod but didn't see how he should be able to even lift his head high enough to drink. It seemed like way too much of an effort.

Seeing the problem Dean gently cupped the back of Nick's head and helped him to lift it while he reached for the glass of water with the other hand.

"Small sips."

The cold liquid hit his lips and it tasted like heaven and way too soon Dean took the glass away.

"Slow or it will come right back." He placed the glass back on the tray.

"How long?" Nick actually managed something close to words.

"Over two days." Dean reached out to stroke the hair out of Nick's face but dropped his hand half-way.

_He doesn't want to touch me_ , Nick realized and if he had enough liquid left in him he would be blinking against tears right now. And Nick couldn't even blame Dean. Not after what he'd done to him. It still hurt, though.

"I was close to hooking you up on an IV to get some fluids in you." Dean continued as if nothing had happened. "Okay, looks like it stays done. More?"

Nick finished the rest of the water and then he lay back with a content sigh.

"How do you feel?" Dean asked and there was real concern in his voice.

Nick thought about that for a moment. "Beaten. Exhausted."

"How about …?" He made a gesture over Nick's lower regions.

"Better." The need was still there but faint enough to be ignored. His raging hard-on was subdued to a half-hard state and the last thing he wanted to do was to touch himself there. Just breathing sent enough movement down to his groin, letting his cock brush against the fabric of the sweatpants he was wearing, to make it uncomfortable.

"Good." Dean gave him a smile which only deepened the shadows under his eyes. "Wanna try the chicken broth now?"

Nick's stomach grumbled its answer to that.

"I take that as a yes." Dean propped him up with pillows stuffed behind his back and then he placed the steaming mug in Nick's hands. Warmth seeped though the porcelain, warming his fingers he hadn't noticed were cold.

He did need Dean's help to bring the mug up to his lips without spilling the broth all over himself but he counted it as progress that he could lift his arms high enough to reach his mouth.

The broth had the perfect temperature to drink, not burning hot but warming him from the inside. By the time the mug was empty Nick's eyes dropped and he blinked drowsily at Dean.

"Where are we, anyway?" He had another look around, the room seemed vaguely familiar now and Nick thought it could be one of the room he'd been in with Dean earlier.

"We're at Bobby's." Dean answered. "That friend of mine?"

"Hmm." Nick remembered the stranger with Sam and Dean. The one who thought they were nothing more than brothers.

"This is the guest room Sam and I usually stay at." Dean explained but Nick had trouble keeping his eyes open.

"Okay, back to sleeping." Dean took the mug away before he eased Nick down to lying position. "You need anything else?"

"I'm good."

"Alright." Dean straightened and stood up. Instantly Nick tensed and he wanted to reach out for him, to hold him back, keep him at his side but his hand was trapped under the covers and he couldn't work it free.

"I think I'll take a nap then, too." Dean glanced at the second bed, chewing his lip. "I can take the couch downstairs, if you feel more comfortable that way." Avoiding Nick's eyes he waited for an answer.

Caught by surprise Nick didn't answer right away.

"Yeah, I get it." Dean rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. "It's okay, really. I'll leave the door open so I can hear you if you need something. Just holler."

Helplessly Nick watched him leaving, watched his painful posture and how he bowed his legs even farther due to the pain he was feeling, no doubt about that.

_I did this to him._

Nick didn't hold him back, just listened to how he made his way slowly down the stairs.

Nick didn't want Dean to sleep on the couch, didn't want him out of the room, in fact even the second bed was too far away for his liking. Nick wanted Dean with him in this bed, wanted Dean close by, wanted Dean to hold him. But that would never happen again.

Dean couldn't even stand touching him.

_I'm weak,_ he told himself. _I should have been strong enough to make her stop. But no, I let her do it, I_ begged _her to do it. What kind of man am I? Pathetic little shit. Weak and tainted. I should be glad Dean stayed with me for this long. And how did I repay him for that? I raped him. Over and over again. He's my boyfriend and I did_ that _to him. I raped him. How could I do that? How could I?_

His fingers found his bracelet around his wrist with the bent and twisted buckle.

_Nice metaphor,_ he thought bitterly. However, it was the closest he would come to being near Dean ever again. That was clear now.

Tracing along the lines of the pentagram in the middle Nick made a decision. As soon as he could get out of this bed on his own, he would leave. Sparing Dean the trouble of kicking him out. He only hoped Sam wasn't back by then. Nick doubted he could stand that pitying expression he knew Sam would show.

His sight swam with tears and quietly he cried himself to sleep.

Sleep wasn't peaceful. Nick dreamed. Later he couldn't recall more than a few images, she was there, and the disturbing feeling the dream left behind. He woke with a scream.

He was tangled in the sheets, soaked in cold sweat and his heart was racing. For a moment he didn't know where he was. Panting he fought against the rising panic.

Then Dean was there.

"Hey, Nick." He said in a soft voice and the mattress dipped when he sat down next to him. Nick threw himself at him, slung his arms around his neck and drew him close.

"Dean." He whimpered in the other man's chest.

"I'm here. It's okay." Dean cupped his head and hold him tight.

Nick had heard that words a million times over the last few days but they still did the trick. He sunk deeper into the embrace and Dean just hold him.

Slowly Nick calmed down, his breathing evened out and suddenly he became aware of what he was doing. Still forcing himself on Dean, still using him for his own purpose.

"Thanks, I'm good now." He pried himself out of Dean's arms, ashamed that he'd given in to that weakness in the first place, even if that was the last thing he wanted to do. "I'm sorry. Didn't want to wake you."

"It's okay." Dean poured some of the apple juice into the glass on the bedside table. "Here, you should drink some more."

Nick took the glass in both hands but he was able to drink on his own now. Dean smiled at him as if he was proud of him.

When he'd finished the glass, Dean took it away and urged Nick to lay down again.

"Think you can sleep now?" He asked and when Nick nodded, he tried to stand up again but this time Nick was quicker. He grabbed Dean's wrist and placed his hand over his heart.

"Could you …" He licked his lips not sure how to proceed from here but Dean hadn't drawn his hand back so Nick gathered all the courage he could master. "Could you sit with me? Just for a minute?"

_Selfish little bastard._

"Sure." Dean smiled at him and the smile reached his eyes. "If you want me to."

Nick nodded and grabbed Dean's wrist with both hands now, holding his hand in place over his heart.

"Please."

With Dean close by sleep came easy. Nick sank deeper into the mattress, body relaxed and exhausted but in a good way this time. Nick let out a content sigh and without really thinking about it he rolled to his side. Still holding Dean's hand in a tight grip Nick dragged him with him, leaving him no other choice than to lay down with him.

There was a moment of hesitation from Dean, enough to stir Nick but then Dean's warm body spooned up with him from behind, a solid wall between Nick and the rest of the world. Feeling safe Nick let go of the last bit of consciousness and drifted off to sleep.


	18. Chapter 18

Like Bobby had promised, first thing in the morning, they drove over to the police department. Actually that was the second thing, the first one was Sam trying to call his brother but he only got his voice-mail and that didn't really lightened Sam's mood.

"You know it isn't likely that he has time to answer his phone." Bobby tried to reassure him and at the same time fought against the images in his mind. He loved Dean like his own son and he was happy for him that he had found this Nick but there were things Bobby didn't want to think about. And with Nick high on succubus venom there was not doubt about what they were doing right now.

"Yeah, I know." Sam put his phone away and grabbed his suit jacket. "It's just …" He shook his head and he looked wounded as if it was his boyfriend suffering.

_Boy has always been too compassionate for his own good_ , Bobby thought and followed him outside. Maybe it was because Sam actually knew his brother's boyfriend, which was still a strange thought. Bobby had only seen Nick for a minute or so and had never really spoken with him. It was easier as long as the victim was a stranger.

At the department they flashed their badges and after a few minutes of waiting the officer handling the case had time for them. That delay alone raised Bobby's hackles. Usually the locals jumped as soon as the FBI was in the building. If in a helpful or hindering way depended but they jumped. This officer only seemed bored.

"Agents." The officer, his name tag read Wilson, offered them a seat in front of his desk. "Why does the FBI bother with a small case like this?" He asked, looking from Sam to Bobby and back. "A solved case, by the way."

"Solved?" Sam echoed, looking up from the thin file he was flipping through. "How can this be solved?"

"We may not have him in custody yet." Officer Wilson admitted. "But we know that Nick Perkins murdered his boyfriend Aiden Green. The warrant is out, it's just a matter of time until we catch him. He most likely shows up at his usual spot tonight, these little …" Remembering his audience he cleared his throat. "These male prostitutes are usually very predictable. Not the brightest bulbs out there, if you know what I mean."

"Actually." Sam said in his I'm-really-pissed-now voice. "No, I don't know what you mean."

That wiped the smug grin from the officer's face.

"There is this puddle of blood on the floor." Sam continued. "But I don't see any analysis."

"Look." Officer Wilson said, barely holding back his anger. "I don't know about the FBI but we don't have the time or the money do go all CSI over every case. The victim died from a broken neck which most likely happened when he was thrown in the TV. A lot of broken glass around so I'd say the blood belongs to Mr. Perkins." The officer spread his hands in a helpless manner. "I don't know what you want from me. I have a witness who confirms that there was no third person in the apartment, who saw Mr. Perkins kissing another man right in front of the building earlier that day and who saw Mr. Perkins leaving the apartment in a hurry after what sounded like a very heated argument. I don't know about you but this sounds pretty solved to me."

"So you're basing this on the statement of one witness." Sam summed up and closed the file.

"Son, I don't know if you've noticed it but we're talking about the hooker district here." Officer Wilson tried to sound reasonable. "Things like this happen there all the time. Not exactly a safe place."

Sam's jaw twitched and he jerked his head ready to tell the officer exactly what he thought about that but Bobby was quicker.

"As far as you're concerned, this is it?" Bobby asked and threw Sam a glance to can it.

"Like I said, the patrols have an eye on the apartment and the street. That's all we can do." He leaned back in his seat. "If the FBI wants to take this case, be my guest, but I have more than enough other cases on my table."

Bobby got Sam out of the building before he could go ballistic on the officer.

"It's his goddamn job to analyze the blood." Sam fumed and loosened his tie on the way back to Bobby's car.

"You know, it's probably a good thing he didn't." They got in the car and Bobby started the engine. "Don't know how human succubus blood is, if it's too weird …"

"Yeah, I know." Sam sighed and slumped in his seat. "It's just not fair. After all Nick's been through, what he's going through right now, it's just not fair that on top of that he's now wanted for his best friend's murder."

It wasn't fair but there was nothing they could do about it.

They stayed for two days in town but couldn't find a lead on the succubus. Sam spent most of the time on the internet searching for suspicious deaths or anything that could give them a hint but the succubus was careful.

She knew that Bobby was after her and with Nick alive and the message she'd left for Dean she would be stupid to stay in the area.

Dean called after the second day to tell them that it was over and they could come home. So Bobby and Sam packed up and headed for Sioux Falls.

They didn't speak much during the drive but with every mile Sam became more anxious. To get both their minds off the dark thoughts Bobby went for the more trivial problems ahead.

"I think we should give Dean and Nick the guest room." Bobby broke the silence. "You okay with the couch for a while?"

Sam stared at him for a moment as but then he shrugged. "Sure."

Another thought occurred to Bobby. "If Nick is still comfortable with somebody else in the room, that is. He can have my bed and I take the couch if he feels better that way."

He nodded to himself, satisfied with the problem solved. Now Sam stared at him in clear disbelieve.

"Bobby, I don't know what to say." His voice broke with emotion.

"You two care about Nick, a lot, I can see that." Bobby kept his eyes on the road. "And after what happened to him, the succubus and the venom, let's just say, he'll need every support he can get. And if he needs some space, hell, I can give him that."

"You know you're awesome, right?"

"Took you a while to notice." Bobby muttered loud enough for Sam to hear. "So tell me, does Nick like chili? Because I know you boys do and I'm planning on a big pot for this evening."

When they arrived at the salvage yard they found the Impala parked askew in front of the house.

"They seemed to have been in a hurry." Sam commented with pain in his voice.

"Let's get inside."

The house was quiet but evidence of what had happened was everywhere. In the hallway lay a vase shattered to pieces with a strain on the wall right next to it but Bobby really didn't want to think about that. Books and papers lay on the floor around his desk and the couch didn't stand quite where he'd left it either.

"They're probably asleep." Sam guessed and headed up the stairs to check on them. Bobby followed him a little slower.

When he reached the top of the stairs he found Sam standing in the open door of the guest room. Curious Bobby risked a glance.

"Ain't they cute?" Bobby couldn't help but smile at the sight in front of him. Curled together like cats, Dean on top of the covers sprawled over the lump under the covers. The only thing visible of Nick was a small patch of hair and they both snored softly. Quietly Sam shut the door and as stealthy as possible they made their way back downstairs.

"Dean must be pretty exhausted if he doesn't even stir." Sam got them beers out of the fridge and for the first time in days he looked almost happy again.

"Bet the last two days weren't fun for him either." Bobby took the beer. "Get a knife and start chopping some veggies. Let's get this chili started so our sleeping beauties have something filling when they wake up."

Keeping his hands busy stopped Bobby from thinking too much, he had Dean's boyfriend under his roof, for example, and it didn't take long for a delicious aroma to fill the air.

Together they finished the preparing part in record time and then the chili just had to stew for quite a while. So they put the couch back to its place and sat down with another beer. Before he sat down Bobby looked for suspicious strains, though, but didn't find any.

Sure enough, the rich aroma of the chili got the eldest Winchester's attention and Dean made his way slowly down the stairs.

Bobby had seen some battered Winchesters in his time but Dean really looked bad. Hollow eyes with dark shadows under them and he seemed to have lost a pound or two since Bobby had seen him last. And he moved like he was about ninety, slow and like every joint ached. Why his bow legs were more prominent than usual was one of the things Bobby didn't want to think about.

"You're back early." Dean observed with a yawn. "Any luck with that succubitch?"

He dropped next to Sam on the couch and snagged his brother's beer.

"Lost her." Sam admitted and didn't even pretend to fight for his beer. "How's Nick?"

"Sleeping."

"They think Nick killed Aiden." Sam filled Dean in.

"That blows." Resting the bottle on his knee Dean leaned back and rubbed his face. He hadn't bothered shaving and was sporting some stubble which gave him an even more ragged look.

"Like I said, he can stay here as long as he wants." Bobby reminded him of his offer. "He'll need some time to recover."

Bobby left the brothers alone for a moment to check on the chili and to set the table. He didn't know if Nick was up for eating with them but he laid his place out as well.

Right on time the brothers strolled in.

"What about Nick?" Bobby asked when the Winchesters had taken their seats. "Should we wake him?"

He put the pot in the middle and started filling the bowls.

"He could barely hold a glass earlier." Dean shook his head and tried to get out of his seat. "I'll bring him a bowl."

Sam only rested his hand on his brother's shoulder but that alone put Dean back in his seat. He huffed in annoyance but didn't try to get up again.

"Sit down and eat, you need it." Sam ordered. "I check on him."

He took a bowl and a slice of bread and made his way upstairs. Bobby didn't say anything while he was in earshot but when he heard the door of the guest room shut behind him, he had to ask.

"Is Nick going to be okay with Sam?" Bobby wasn't a psychologist but too many people around could be stressful for Nick right now.

"Why shouldn't he be?" Dean was honestly surprised by that question. He was already half-way through his first bowl.

"Sam and Nick get along?" Bobby asked instead of an answer. Which was a stupid question because if they didn't get along, there would be no Nick in Dean's life.

"Are you kidding me?" Dean asked around half-chewed chili. "Sam has adopted him, going all BFF on him."

They ate in silence for a moment, Dean helping himself with a third bowl.

"How are you?" Bobby finally asked.

"Tired, exhausted." Came the surprisingly honest answer. "Sore." Dean added with a smirk.

Bobby choked on a piece of bread.


	19. Chapter 19

_We are not even._ That thought hammered in Ishtar's mind. _We are not even._

Decision made Ishtar had to hurry. She'd left her mark on Nick two days ago and it was fading. Fast.

With it gone she wouldn't be able to find him again. And it wasn't helpful that apparently he'd moved as well. She got herself a car, men were so easy, and drove towards that faint beacon. She only stopped for gas once otherwise she drove through but when she reached a town called Sioux Falls, her mark was almost gone. It led her out of town to the outskirts and that was it.

Cursing Ishtar stopped the car and had a look around. Only a few scattered houses around here, open fields and a salvage yard. She was close, she knew it, he was around here somewhere.

It had become night by now and Ishtar used the dark to sneak up to the nearest house. The lights were on and that made it easy to spy on the people inside. A family having dinner. They chatted and looked happy and not like they were hiding someone coming down from a succubus venom trip.

Ishtar made her way through the neighborhood. One house was dark and she couldn't rule it out but she was pretty sure she could cross the others from the list. A woman alone in front of the TV, a boy doing homework at the kitchen table with his father preparing dinner behind him, an old couple on the couch with their dog at their feet. Ordinary suburban boredom.

Which left the salvage yard. Ishtar made her way on foot through the gate telling her that it belonged to somebody named _Singer_.

Old car wrecks lined the way up to the house that was hidden behind all that junk. Ishtar came around a slight corner and knew this was the place. In front of an old house stood a familiar car.

"Gotcha." Ishtar whispered and ducked behind a dead junker. Right next to Dean Winchester's car was another familiar one, one she hadn't expected to see ever again. She'd only seen it for a second but she would recognize this old thing everywhere.

"Crap." She ducked deeper into the shadows. It wasn't likely that she would be spotted here but this was a bad place to be. As far as she knew there were at least two hunters inside, three if Dean had his brother slash lover with him. Which still was hilarious.

"Okay, okay." She muttered to herself while she tried to figure out how to proceed. First she had to find out what the situation actually was. Were they here for just a visit or would they stay for longer? If she'd found some kind of hunter headquarters, and for sure it looked like it, she had to be very careful. They wouldn't expect her coming for them, that was her advantage over them, but as soon as they suspected she was around the hunt would be on.

_Just a little sneak peek_ , she thought and crept closer. But stumbled backwards when the door suddenly opened and the hunter with the trucker cap stepped outside.

"Let's get your and Sam's stuff inside." The man said over his shoulder to Dean who followed him. "And try unpacking for a change, you're staying for a while. At least until Nick got his footing back."

"Yes, sir." Dean responded and went for the trunk of his car while the other man got several bags out of his.

Dean came up with a single bag and took over another one from the older hunter and weighted both with a tug at the handles.

"Nick has nothing left." He said in a matter of fact way but with sadness behind the words.

"He seemed fine wearing some of your clothes for now." They headed back for the door. "But you probably should take him shopping."

Dean made a face. "I think I'll leave that to Sam, he loves shopping."

The door shut behind them and Ishtar slumped to the ground with her back against the rusty car.

_That was close._ She let out a shaky breath and fought against the urge to run. What was she doing her? She wasn't a fighter.

But then she let her face shift back to what it really looked like and traced the lines of the scars and the bumps of the deformed bones with her fingertips. Putting her mask back in place she came up to a crouched position. The house was quiet but a few rooms were lit. One upstairs which was useless to her but for sure she could have quick look inside on the ground level. Avoiding the front porch she made her way closer to the house.

The kitchen was empty with used dishes in the sink and she found Dean and that other man in what looked like combined study and living room. Books and papers were piled on every horizontal surface but some piles lay clattered to the ground and the two men were busy tidying up. The older hunter moved way more agile than Dean and at some point he just waved him off and Dean plopped down on the couch. Ishtar couldn't hear what they were saying but Dean didn't look happy that he was sent to his place like a kid.

Not a minute later his chin rested on his chest and he was fast asleep and the other man just stood there for a moment, watching him with a fond smile on his lips. Dean slept, now with a blanket draped over him, and the other hunter quietly continued tidying up.

Ishtar should leave, she knew that. She had no idea where Nick was. Or Sam for that matter. One of them could come up right behind her any second. But she stayed and watched.

The older hunter had sat down with a book at his desk and Dean was still sleeping when another man entered the room.

Dean was tall. This man was taller. And he seemed to be younger than Dean so this had to be Sam. When the newcomer spotted Dean half-sitting, half-lying wrapped in a blanket on the couch his face became soft with love and there was no doubt, this was Sam the little brother slash lover.

He and the older hunter exchanged a few words before Sam stepped closer to his brother and gently shook his shoulder.

He looked like a kid begging for another five minutes but then Sam said something and Dean was wide awake and a second later out of the room.

Dean didn't come back but Ishtar stayed until Sam made himself comfortable on the couch and the older hunter left the room. The lights went out and then the house lay dark and quiet.

Deep in thoughts Ishtar walked back to her car.

They would stay _until Nick got his footing_ back. She'd fucked him up pretty good so that could take a while. Ishtar smiled to herself.

In her mind she made a list of the things she'd need. First of all, a base of operations, she was planning on staying for a while. Then she needed eyes on them. It was too risky to do that herself but she was pretty sure she could find a man or two willing to help her out.

If she could get one of them alone, things could become interesting. She licked her lips in anticipation and started the car. Dean already knew what she looked like as the woman of his dreams and she doubted they would let Nick out of their sight. And Sam was an unreliability on his own. If he was bi like his brother she could get him, however, if he was gay she would have the same trouble she had with Nick with the difference that Sam was a hunter. The older hunter was probably her best shot. Or Nick again if she could get her hands on him.

"Nick would be fun." She bit her bottom lip. "Definitely worth the trouble."

Ishtar stayed the night at a hotel and didn't even scam her way into a free room. Low profile, was the word of the day. With so many hunters around she didn't want to draw attraction.

She used the next day to get a feeling for this town.

Just cruising around in her car she mapped out the area and tried to get a sense of direction. Around noon she knew where Wall Mart was and most of the bars and restaurants, places she guessed her prey would visit, and she had spotted at least a million Starbucks. She parked the car near the center and sat down in a nice park with a hotdog. The hotdog guy had been quite chatty, pointing her at some things she just had to see around here, and now she just sat there and watched the people around her. A nice town with nice people.

After she'd finished her hotdog she had a little walk around in the center of the town. She walked down the street, passing shops and restaurants, grocery stores and a pawn shop. Nothing of interest and she was on her way back to the car when she felt something strange, an uneasy feeling in her stomach, and for some reason she crossed the street to walk on the other side.

Ishtar stopped and pretending to look at some shoes in the next window she had a careful glance around. She didn't see anything out of the ordinary and was about to shrug the feeling off when she spotted a little bookstore sandwiched between another Starbucks and a copy shop. The building was old and the name was carved in the wood above the door. _Inquiring Minds_ with pentagrams right and left to it.

The one small window displaying several old books had a slogan written on it: _Hunting for a good read? We have everything you need._

Okay, that was a place she should have an eye on. It smelled of hunters.

The store seemed to be warded because when she tried again to come near the door, the urge to just leave grew stronger with every step. Very interesting.

Ishtar let the store be for the moment, she didn't want somebody inside to take notice of her, and went back to her car. It was late enough in the day so that most people would be home from work by now and she hoped to find her base of operations in the neighborhood of the salvage yard.

She needed a place preferably without a woman around which left the previously dark house or the one with the father and his son as possible options.

Clutching a battered notebook she'd found in the glove compartment of her borrowed car she approached the first house.

"Evening." She greeted the woman who opened the door and mentally crossed this house from her already short list. "Do you have a few minutes for a small survey? It won't take long, just a few questions."

She even had to come up with some questions because the woman had time for a random survey but that got them into a conversation and Ishtar could sneak in a question or two about the nearby salvage yard. Apparently the owner, a Bobby Singer, was a nice guy who stayed to himself most of the time.

"He sometimes has visitors at the unlikeliest hours." The woman knew to tell.

"I saw this black car, an Impala I think." Ishtar prompted.

"Oh yes." Her eyes lit up. "That belongs to his nephews. Nice young men. They visit him from time to time."

Ishtar thanked her for her time and drove over to the other house.

The boy opened the door.

"Hey, sweetie." She smiled at him. He hadn't hit puberty yet so he was immune to her. "Is your mother home?"

"She doesn't live with us." He answered and Ishtar suppressed a predatory smile.

"Is your daddy home, then?"


	20. Chapter 20

Nick woke up to a lack of Dean.

He remembered how he'd asked him to stay and how he'd held Dean's hand and there was the distant memory of Dean spooning warm behind him but he wasn't sure if that hadn't just been part of a dream.

However, when Nick woke up he was alone in the bed and nobody had slept in the second one and all in all the room lacked in Dean.

_Of course_ , Nick thought and curled up to tight ball. _He left as soon as I was asleep._

Nick wasn't sure why Dean had bothered to comfort him in the first place, false sense of responsibility was his best guess, but he wasn't surprised that Dean couldn't stand being with him in the same room for a longer amount of time. Not after what he'd done to him.

Nick was about to roll out of bed – in a minute, why was he still so tired? – and to get out of Dean's life when there was a soft knock at the door.

"Nick, you awake?" Sam poked his head in and Nick just wanted to disappear. Sam was here which meant he'd spoken to Dean so he knew. Or he'd just _seen_ Dean and he knew what Nick had done to him. And when it came down to it, Sam had been Dean's boyfriend way longer than Nick, hell, they were brothers, there was no question where Sam stood in this.

"Hey." Sam said and set a steaming bowl on the tray Dean had left on the nightstand. It smelled delicious and Nick's stomach growled in anticipation.

"How do you feel?" Sam asked and stood for a moment like he had no idea what to do next before he sat down awkwardly on the edge of Nick's bed.

Nick propped himself up on one shaky elbow.

"Sam." His voice was still hoarse and he had to clear his throat to get the next words out. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Sam poured the rest of the apple juice in the glass but stopped in the middle of it to throw a confused glance at Nick.

"I didn't know what I was doing." It was a lame excuse. His arm gave under him and he collapsed back into the pillow. "I never wanted to hurt Dean." Nick sobbed the words into the fabric of the pillow.

"Hey." Sam's hand landed on his shoulder, reluctantly at first as if he wasn't sure if he wanted to touch Nick. "It's okay. You didn't hurt Dean. He'll walk funny for a while and he needs some sleep but that's all. He's fine."

Sam didn't get it. How could he not get it?

"I raped him!" Nick threw the words at him and sure enough Sam flinched back. Now he got it. Sam's confused expression changed but not to disgust like Nick had expected.

"No. No, Nick." Sam was close again. "You didn't. You hear me? You didn't do that to Dean."

Nick remembered the raw need. Remembered how he'd barely left Dean time to get the lube out, how he'd skipped the prep, how Dean had writhed under him in pain. And that had only been the beginning. It had become worse after that.

"She did that to you." Sam drew him out of his memories. "You are the victim here. She raped you."

Those words were a slap right in his face. But Sam wasn't done yet.

"And after that? That was the venom. You were poisoned. You had no control over it."

Nick wasn't so sure if he believed it but he nodded because that was what Sam expected from him and wiped away the fresh tears. He was crying a lot lately. But what else could you expect from a pathetic little shit like him?

"What's in the bowl?" Nick asked in desperate need to change the topic. A minute ago it had smelled delicious but now his appetite was gone.

"Bobby's special chili. You'll love it." Sam helped him to sit up and stuffed the pillow in his back to keep him upright and then placed the bowl in his lap.

Under Sam's watchful eye Nick had a few spoonful of chili and nibbled at the bread. He guessed it was good but for some reason he couldn't really taste anything. When he was done Sam took the bowl away and then they sat in uncomfortable silence.

"Ehm, Sam?" Nick slid back to a half-lying position, every muscle ached and his groin sent sparks of pain up his spine every time his cock brushed the fabric of his sweatpants. Which weren't really his and Nick didn't want to think about how he'd ended up in bed, freshly showered and dressed. In a stranger's house, no less, and he'd already overstayed his welcome.

"Yes?" Sam ask softly.

"Is it okay, you know …" Avoiding Sam's eye he picked lints from the blanket. "If I stay for the night? I'll be gone in the morning. Promise."

Sam just stared at him.

"Oh, okay." Nick's heart broke. "I can leave now." He had no idea where to go, nobody to turn to but he would leave. He reached out to throw the blanket off but Sam caught his wrist.

"May I?" Sam asked already working the bent buckle of the bracelet open. Nick swallowed but didn't protest. Of course Sam wanted it back, Nick didn't deserve it. Not anymore.

"See this?" Sam turned the bracelet around so Nick could see the inner side.

"Sam, Nick, Dean." Sam said and traced the names burned in the leather with his finger.

"This is still true, this is still us." Sam placed the bracelet in Nick's hand and closed it around the leather band. Then he covered Nick's fist with both of his large hands. "We love you. I love you. Dean may never say it but he loves you." Sam paused to let the words sink in. "You can stay as long as you want. We want you to stay. Please, stay with us."

"Sam." Nick flung himself at Sam and buried his face in his broad chest, clinging tightly to him. Sam closed his arms around him and rocked him softly.

They sat like that for a long time until Nick's sobs died down and he hung heavily in Sam's arms.

"Wanna lay down?" Sam asked in a low voice and eased him down. He didn't say anything about his shirt wet with snot and tears and that was real love, right? Nick smiled at that thought and Sam smiled right back.

"It's late." Sam observed and brushed the hair out of Nick's face. "And you look tired. You should sleep."

Sam leaned in and for a second Nick thought he would kiss him on the forehead like he was child but in the last second Sam changed direction and kissed him on the lips instead.

After that Sam just stared at him like a deer in the headlights, maybe waiting for Nick to freak out. So Nick gave him a little kiss in return.

"Good night, Nick." Sam stood up and turned to leave and now Nick started to freak out.

"Sam?" He called out but then had no idea what to say.

"Yeah?" Sam turned in the door, hand already on the light switch. Nick would be alone and in the dark and he couldn't do that. He couldn't.

Sam was back at his side in a heartbeat.

"Nick, what is it?"

"I …" This was ridiculous. "I don't think I like to be alone." There, he'd said it.

Sam didn't laugh at him. Instead he seemed torn.

"Is it okay if I get Dean?" He finally asked. "I bet he's ready for bed anyway."

Nick felt a little stab in his heart. Sam didn't want to stay with him. But then he remembered this Bobby guy who though that only Dean and Nick were together. It would look weird if Sam stayed with him instead of Dean, Nick got that. At least that was the explanation he chose to believe in, deep down he knew better.

"If he wants to." _If he can stand being in the same room as me_ , was the unspoken part.

"He wants." Sam seemed to be certain about that and without another word he went to get Dean.

It took a minute or two, long enough for Nick to worry, but then Dean came in.

"Sam said you missed me?" Dean smiled a tired but honest smile and sat down on the second bed. "I don't know about you but the last few days were exhausting. Ready to hit the hay?"

"Could you show me the bathroom first?" Nick asked because by now his bladder was close to bursting.

Dean showed him the bathroom and even gave him some ointment for the sore parts.

Nick's penis didn't like peeing at the moment but the ointment soothed the irritation and in the end Nick could get the sweatpants up without discomfort. He quickly brushed his teeth with his finger before he returned to the guest room.

"We'll buy you some things tomorrow." Dean promised and stretched out in the second bed. Nick didn't like that but he didn't say anything either. He slipped under his own covers and Dean switched off the lights.

"Dean?" He asked after a minute.

"Hmm?"

"I didn't mean to hurt you." He said in a quiet voice. He'd talked about this with Sam but it was Dean who needed to hear it.

"You didn't hurt me." Came his answer out of the darkness. There was some shifting but Nick could only make out his silhouette. "I had to go through this on my own, remember? I knew what was coming and I offered to help you through. You didn't … rape me or anything. It was my choice."

"Sam told you." Of course he'd told Dean.

"That you're beating yourself up over something that wasn't your fault? Yeah, he told me." Dean let out a sigh. "If this is anybody's fault, it's mine. I had the chance to kill her and I screwed up. Then Bobby asked me to play bait but I wanted to celebrate our anniversary and she got away. It's my fault."

Nick thought about that for a moment. The thought of Sam and Dean out there killing monsters was still fairly new to him and he would have called them crazy if he hadn't been face to face with a monster himself.

"But if she already knew you, wouldn't she know it's a trap?"

Dean had nothing to say to that and they fell back into silence. After a while Dean started to snore softly but Nick couldn't sleep. He stared into the darkness and fought against he rising panic.

Alone with nothing but his thoughts there was nothing holding back the memories. She was there, taunting him. He felt her hands on him and remembered how kissing her had felt like. Then his mind skipped to Dean. What he'd done to Dean. His memory was fuzzy about most of it but what he remembered was bad enough.

Nick's breath hitched and he was close to hyperventilating and it was either having a full blown panic attack or doing something about it.

Praying that Sam had been right about Dean's feelings he got out of bed and padded over to the other one. Unsure what to do next he stood there with clenched fists and not enough air in his lungs.

"C'mere." Dean mumbled and lifted the covers.


	21. Chapter 21

It was still early when Nick woke up the next time but this time Dean was with him, arm and leg thrown over Nick, holding him tight. Nick would have loved to just stay like that until Dean woke up, however, he'd been in the same position for way too long and his muscles and joints competed over what ached more. And on top of that he felt icky after staying in bed all day. 

A shower would be awesome, he decided. Carefully to not wake Dean Nick pried himself out of Dean's grip and padded barefoot over to the bathroom. The house was quiet, the others were probably still sleeping, and Nick felt a little bit like an intruder when he went through the cupboards in search for towels and a washcloth.

When the hot water finally hit his back in strong jets all worries were forgotten for the moment. The water worked the kinks out of his abused body and for a while he just stood there and let the water do the work. He nudged the temperature up a little higher and started washing himself. He worked the soap in his skin, scrubbing himself clean.

When the water started to get colder he finally stopped and stepped out of the stall. Nick hissed when the rough texture of the towel met his nearly scaled skin but he ignored it and dried off as quickly as possible. He had locked the door but he felt like somebody would burst in any minute. He wouldn't mind Sam or Dean, much, but that Bobby guy? Just no.

He had nothing else to wear, he didn't even know where Dean had put the jeans and shirt he'd borrowed him earlier, so Nick put the sweatpants and t-shirt back on. They were a bit smelly by now but they had to do. It was all he had left.

He didn't even own the clothes he was wearing. Taking a deep breath Nick fought against the tears once again welling in his eyes.

By the time he left the bathroom he had himself under control again. Standing in the short hallway he had no idea what to do next, though. Safest option was to go back to Dean, crawl back in bed with him until Dean woke up on his own. But Nick was thirsty and his stomach reminded him with an angry gnarling that he hadn't eaten much for days now. So kitchen it was.

On the stairs the smell of fresh coffee hit him. Somebody was awake. That Bobby or Sam, it was a fifty-fifty chance and Nick wasn't sure if he wanted to risk that. What if it really was Bobby down there in the kitchen? Nick couldn't just stroll in and ask for a coffee.

Nick turned on the stairs and made a step back to the safety of the guest room, back to Dean.

"You want to stand there all day?" A voice that was definitely not Sam's suddenly asked and Nick froze to the spot. Panic kicked back in and he wanted to run. As soon as he had his legs back under control.

"Come down here, boy." The rough voice ordered and Nick turned just far enough to have a look at the man standing in the doorway to the kitchen. The man had changed into worn jeans and flannel shirts with a trucker's cap and it was the similarity to Sam and Dean's style that made Nick fully turn and walk down the stairs.

"Coffee?" The man, Bobby, asked and retreated to the kitchen. "How do you like your eggs?"

Barely a minute later Nick sat at the kitchen table with a steaming mug of coffee in hand and watched Bobby at the stove.

"Was about to make some scrambled eggs and bacon." Bobby said over his shoulder while he searched for a pan. "You like some?"

"Yes, sir." Nick hurried to say. He would have said the same if the man had offered him fried saw dust, he was a guest in his house and he knew his manners, and his stomach grumbled in anticipation anyway. He stirred some sugar in his coffee before he tasted it. Strong and hot, just like he needed it.

"Just Bobby, please." Bobby cracked the first egg.

"Thanks for letting me stay, uhm ... Bobby." Nick said quietly.

Now Bobby turned around, spatula in hand. "I've told Dean and now I'm telling you. You can stay as long as you want."

"You don't even know me." Nick said into his mug, avoiding the other man's eye.

"That's right." Bobby sighed. "But I know Dean. He doesn't trust easy and I don't think he's ever been with someone longer than a few weeks. If he's been with you for a year now, you must mean a lot to him." He turned back to the eggs. "But he still owes me an explanation why he didn't tell me." He grumbled into his beard.

Nick could have told him about that but he kept his mouth shut. It was fairly new to him that Sam and Dean were also brothers, however, to this man they would be also lovers and that would be the worse revelation.

Bobby filled two plates with eggs, bacon and toast and set the bigger one in front of Nick.

"Eat up." He encouraged him. "I bet you need it."

Before he knew it, Nick had wolfed down half of his food.

"This is good." He said around a piece of buttered toast.

"There's more where that's coming from." Bobby smiled warmly at him. "Until Dean gets his ass down here, that is." He sighed dramatically. "That boy is going to eat me out of house and home one day."

Now Nick smiled and he decided that he liked Bobby. However, he was still waiting for the questions. Bobby must have a lot of them. How they had first met, for example, and Nick had no idea how to answer that one.

But Bobby didn't ask. Instead he openly sized Nick up which in a way was better than to be sized up more or less discretely but it made him still uncomfortable.

"We should have brought you some of your clothes from your apartment." Bobby finally said and turned his attention back to the plate in front of him. "Dean's clothes are too big for you."

Nick picked at the hem of the t-shirt. "It'll do for now, until I can get my things out of the apartment at least." He thought about that for a moment. "I don't think I want to live there any longer."

But he should probably call his landlord to tell him that he would be back to get his things. The rent was paid for the month but knowing Mr. Douchebag he should make sure that the apartment wasn't cleaned out when he came back. And Aiden. He should find out when the funeral was, attending his funeral was the least he could do.

"Dean didn't tell you?" Bobby asked suddenly tense.

"Tell me what?"

Bobby fiddled with his fork for a moment.

"The police thinks you murdered your friend." Bobby finally answered with a sigh. "I'm sorry, but you can't go back."

"Why would they think that?" His chest tightened.

Bobby was clearly pondering what to tell him which could only mean that this was bad. Nick squeezed another gulp of air in his lungs while his vision grayed out around the edges.

"The officer working the case wasn't really keen on solving this to begin with and the succubus turned your landlord into a witness against you. Sorry." Bobby answered and through his tunneled vision Nick saw him frown. "Nick, you alright?"

Nick tried to nod but that only made him more dizzy. He couldn't breathe.

Then Bobby was suddenly right next to him, touching his shoulder.

"Nick, hey." He said too close to him. "Calm down, it's okay, just breathe."

Trapped. Nick was trapped, the older man was looming over him, touching him and he couldn't get away. And he couldn't breathe. Nick flinched backwards, fighting against the touch. Black spots danced before his eyes. Then he fell and crashed to the ground which knocked the last bit of air out of his lungs.

"Dammit, boy." He heard a voice over his own blood rushing in his ears. "Dean!"

But it wasn't Dean who hauled him up to a more or less sitting position. Nick fought blindly against the new presence so close to him.

"Nick, it's me. It's Sam." The words pierced through the panic but they didn't make sense at first. Sam's strong hands held him upright with one hand on his forehead to keep his head up and that brought back the memories. The venom, the agony. Dean had held him like this when it had been at its worst.

"Nick, breathe." Sam ordered and then there was something over his mouth. And it smelled like pastry? "It's okay. Just breathe, in and out. That's good. You're doing good, in and out."

Slowly the memories abated. Sam's solid chest against his back, soft words in his ear and Nick focused on breathing. In and out, just like Sam told him to.

"What happened?" Suddenly Dean was there too. His hand landed on Nick's chest right over his racing heart, grounding him more.

"Panic attack." Was Sam's short answer and Nick relaxed a bit farther into him. They were here. Both of them. He was safe.

He didn't know how long they sat there on the kitchen floor but slowly his breathing went back to normal. The panic attack left him exhausted, though, and he blinked sluggishly by the time Dean complained about not feeling his legs anymore. And did he come up with a witty comeback? Nick wasn't sure, he was dizzy and tired and to be honest quite comfy with Sam as a pillow.

"Think we can get you over to the couch, dude?" Dean asked.

Before Nick could decide if he was ready to get up or not, Sam shifted under him and then Nick was just carried over to the other room. With Sam holding his upper body in a firm grip and Dean taking his legs they carried him around like he weighted nothing.

"Put me down." He protested but it came out with a laugh and he didn't really mean it. Carefully they lay him down on the couch and Dean covered him with a still warm blanket which smelled like Sam. Nick snuggled deeper into it.

"You okay now?" Dean sat next to him with Sam hovering over the back of the couch.

"Sorry that I freaked out."

"Don't feel sorry." Dean smirked at him. "Bobby's scrambled eggs tend to do that to a man."

"You're unbelievable." Nick huffed but the words did their job and the tension melted out of Nick's body. He reached out to place a hand on Dean's knee.

"I'm awesome." Dean grinned at him and Sam smacked Dean's arm in a very brotherly way before he mumbled something about coffee and left the two of them alone.

"Bobby said that I can't go home." Nick finally said. "That the police thinks I did that to Aiden."

"We'll figure it out." Dean promised and Nick believed him. "Together we'll figure it out."

His hand landed on top of Nick's, a silent promise to stay right at his side and Nick gave in to sleep. How he could be still so tired he had no idea but his body demanded sleep so he let himself drift off.


	22. Chapter 22

Bobby had heard the shower running for a long time, he'd heard Nick hesitating on the stairs. He'd seen the young man struggling before he'd joined him in the kitchen. Bobby knew that Nick wasn't the most stable person on the planet right now and still he'd managed to drive that boy into a full-blown panic attack.

_Good job, idjit_. His clumsy attempt to calm him down ended with Nick hyperventilating on the floor and Bobby did the only thing he could think off. He bellowed for Dean.

But Dean was upstairs and Sam was right around the corner so it was Sam who came running. Of course Nick fought him, he probably didn't even know who manhandled him into a sitting position.

"It's me." Sam slipped behind Nick and dragged him up to rest against his chest. "It's Sam."

For a moment it looked like Sam just had made it worse and Bobby was about to intervene but then Nick seemed to recognize Sam and stopped fighting.

Then Sam put a paper bag over Nick's nose and mouth and coached him through every breath. In and out while he had Nick's head in a strong but caring hold and the bag puffed up and was sucked in again.

"What happened?" Dean stormed in and got the situation after one glance at his brother and his boyfriend on the floor. And all of a sudden Bobby found himself at the receiving end of the patent Dean Winchester _You hurt my Sammy_ glare of death. Taken aback Bobby didn't say anything. That glare was reserved for everybody dumb enough to mess with Sam but it looked like Nick was under the big brother protection as well. It hit Bobby like a sledge-hammer. Dean really loved this man. This was not an affair, not somebody he'd a little no strings attached fun with. Dean was in love with this man.

Dean's attention switched to Nick and he placed a hand on the other man's heaving chest. Between the two brothers Nick slowly calmed down.

"Better?" Sam took the bag away and craned his neck to look Nick in the eye who nodded but still had to fight to squeeze the air deep enough into his lungs.

"You better be." Dean muttered. "Because I can't feel my legs anymore so I've no idea if Sam is touching me in an inappropriate way right now or not."

_Only Dean_ , Bobby just shook his head and nearly missed Nick's whispered "That's me." delivered with a mischievous smirk.

That seemed to switch the mood completely because all three of them suddenly acted like overgrown five-year-olds. Sam and Dean swiftly picked Nick up and carried him over to the couch. To Bobby's surprise Nick let them carry him without hesitation or any sign of distress, quite the opposite, he seemed relaxed and even let out a little laugh.

Bobby stayed in the kitchen, he wanted to give them a moment alone, and to be honest he hadn't been of much help so far anyway. After a minute Sam reentered the room and went straight for the coffee maker.

"He alright?" Bobby asked and wasn't that a stupid question? Nick wasn't alright.

Sam sat down with his coffee and stretched his legs.

"He's okay." Whatever that meant.

"You hungry?" Bobby asked instead and filled another plate and fixed one for Dean too.

When Dean didn't come back Bobby had a look around the corner to find him sitting on the edge of the couch, holding an asleep Nick's hand and showing no intention to move in the near future.

_Dean holding hands with someone,_ Bobby smiled to himself, _now I've seen everything._

He brought Dean's breakfast over and put it on the table next to him where he could reach it one-handed.

"Thanks, Bobby." Dean said in a low tone to not disturb the sleeping man and reached greedily for the coffee. "What got him riled up like this?"

There was no heat or anger behind the words just honest concern. Bobby understood that this wasn't meant as an accusation, Dean only wanted to know so he could avoid that topic in the future.

"I thought you already told him." He scrubbed his beard. "That he can't go back to his old life."

"I was waiting for the right moment." Dean said with a rueful smile at the sleeping man. Bobby gave Dean a little pat on the shoulder before he left the two alone.

"He's asleep." Bobby said when Sam opened his mouth to ask. Sam was nearly as concerned about Nick as Dean was. Which was a good sign. It told Bobby that Sam was not only okay with his brother's preferences but had excepted Nick as part of the family.

Bobby could only hope that once he had a chance to get to know Dean's boyfriend better he would be equally fond of him. They boys were family after all.

Bobby returned to his own plate and his by now cold coffee.

"Okay." He finally decided to ask. "When did Dean turn Richard Gere?"

Sam stared at him for a second and nearly spit his coffee when he got the reference.

"It somehow just happened." Sam finally answered. "We stayed in town after a job for a few days and Dean picked him up one night for a little fun. And two days later again." He shrugged, a dreamy smile on his face. "It just grew from there. Now we're making up excuses to be in the neighborhood."

Bobby could picture that. California and the surrounding states had never been as supernatural free as during the time Sam had been at Stanford.

"What did Dean tell him what he does for a living?" They had been together for a year now and apparently Nick never knew about Dean's hunter life.

"Actually." Sam chewed on a piece of toast. "That never really came up. Nick likes to keep his privacy, too. They didn't even know each other's last names until a few days ago." He stopped mid-chew, realizing something, while Bobby tried to understand how somebody could be with another person for so long without ever telling each other basic things like their last names. With only sporadic visits they probably had been busy with other thing, Bobby guessed and focused really hard on Sam's next words to keep his mind from picturing _busy_.

"In fact, when Nick's landlord saw them, that has been the first time Nick has taken Dean home. Usually Dean picks him up at a random street corner." Sam paused. "You think that's how she became aware of him?"

"Possible." Bobby shrugged. "But it's been one hell of a coincidence that she's found Nick at all."

Sam hmmed to that and while they finished their breakfast Bobby's mind went to more trivial places. He had planned on being out of town for a few days and now he was back early with three extra mouths to feed.

"With you boys around I need to buy some groceries." Bobby announced. "And Adela should have my order ready by now. You could come along and get some basic stuff for Nick, that boy doesn't even have a toothbrush with his name on it."

_Two strong arms to carry all the stuff won't hurt either,_ Bobby thought because his back didn't like heavy lifting as much as it used to a few years ago but Sam didn't have to know that.

"Good idea." Sam finished his coffee and stood up. "I'm telling Dean and then we can go."

Dean called Sam back two times to add something to the growing list of items Nick would need and in the end Bobby grabbed Sam at the collar and dragged him outside while Dean hissed his last request after them.

As if Sam didn't know what basic stuff a person needed, Bobby thought. Not that Sam had lived most of his life out of one tattered duffel bag or something.

They hit Wal-Mart and while Bobby went for the groceries Sam got the things for Nick. When they rejoined Sam had two jeans, several plain t-shirts, socks and underwear along with a toothbrush, a razor and some toiletries in his cart. And for some reason donuts.

"He likes those?" Bobby guessed.

"They're more of a reminder." The way Sam actually blushed at that Bobby decided he didn't want to know the story behind those.

"You got everything?" Bobby asked instead and mentally went through his own shopping list. Today they were covered with leftover chili and he'd planned steaks for tomorrow. He had everything he'd need for some of the boys' favorite dishes in his cart and he could only hope that Nick liked most of it as well. The way to a man's heart was through his stomach, as the saying went, and Bobby really wanted to win Nick's heart. He seemed like a nice guy.

They stopped at _Inquiring Minds_ next. Bobby couldn't help but smile when Sam's face lit up as soon as they entered the old bookstore. When Sam had been a kid Bobby had parked his ass here for hours while he went with Dean to run errands.

"Sam Winchester!" Adela hollered when she spotted him and had him in a tight hug a second later, her curly locks not even tickling his chin.

"Boy, you should stop growing some time now." She laughed and he bowed his head so she could kiss his cheek. "Bobby, stop feeding him so well."

"Tell that his brother." Bobby countered. "They only remember their old uncle Bobby when they need a place to lick their wounds."

At that she hold Sam at arm's length and looked him over.

"I'm fine." Sam reassured her. "And so is Dean."

"You better don't lie to me, Sam Winchester." She wagged her finger at him.

"Wouldn't think of it, ma'am." Sam tried his best to keep a straight face and she punched his shoulder for that, or at least as far up his arm as she could reach.

"And you." Her finger pointed at Bobby now. "I said Monday."

"We were in town and I thought I should try my luck." Bobby smiled at her. "And Sam wanted to see you."

She raised an eyebrow and didn't believe one word. "Lucky you, I have everything you wanted, just need to bag it."

"Have I told you how awesome you are?" Bobby followed her to the back where a door separated the bookstore from her other business.

"Not enough lately." She opened the door and a pleasant wave of herbal heavy air hit Bobby.

"Sam, why don't you see if you can find anything Nick would like while I check if Adela got my order right this time?" He asked over his shoulder but Sam was already engrossed by the book-loaded shelves and only nodded absently.

"Hey." Adela protested but then stopped and Bobby realized his mistake. "Who's Nick?"

Now Sam's head snapped up and he met Bobby's eyes with something close to panic.

"Nick is a friend of the boys." Bobby phrased it as harmlessly as possible without lying. Dean hadn't come out to him so he doubted Dean would want him to tell around that Nick was his boyfriend.

"A friend." Adela pondered that with her head cocked to the side. "Judging by the deer in the headlights expression you're wearing Sam, I'd say this Nick is more than a friend."

_That woman is too smart for her own good,_ Bobby thought and wanted to kick his own ass for that slip of his tongue.

"You know, Sam." Her voice softened. "I haven't forgotten how you were looking at that Calmer's boy. You were pining for him all summer."

All color left Sam's face and he made a strangled noise.

"Wait, what?" Confused Bobby looked from one to the other but they both seemed to have forgotten that he was there. "Nick is Dean's boyfriend."

There was a moment of absolute silence.

"Dean's?" Adela blinked at him. "Uh, never thought he would go steady with anyone." Her cheeks became darker as she blushed. "Sorry, Sam."

Sam still stood there, a book in hand and a dumbfounded expression on his face, and Bobby hurried to follow Adela to the back where she packed his order without looking him in the eye.

"Tell your brother to bring this Nick over." She said to Sam when they were ready to leave. "I am curious about the man who got Dean Winchester's attention." She hugged him once again and mumbled another apology in his ear.

Back in the car Bobby just had to ask.

"So." He cleared his throat. "You like men, too?"

"Maybe? A little bit?" Sam showed his best sheepish smile with dimples and everything.

"But you don't have a boyfriend in hiding somewhere, don't you?" Bobby pleaded.

"Don't worry." Sam reassured him. "Dean and Nick are the only men I need in my life."


	23. Chapter 23

Lying in bed with her new best friend, Timothy "Tim" Hayden, Ishtar took stock of her situation. Timothy was in his early thirties and healthy, so she could probably feed off him for a few weeks if she was careful. His son Jeremy, Jerry to his father but Jeremy to the new woman in the house and that alone told her he'd be trouble, was nine and a nosy little thing that asked too many questions. And he'd flat out told her that he didn't like her.

However, the Haydens lived next door to Bobby Singer and everybody visiting or leaving the salvage yard had to pass them and Ishtar just had to sit in the kitchen and look out of the window to keep track.

The first morning they had an awkward breakfast with Tim trying to steal a kiss every other second and Jerry, at least in her mind she called him that, asking her how long she intended to stay.

"Tim, why don't you take my car today?" She asked innocently and of course he agreed without missing a beat.

"Why should Daddy take your car?" Jerry asked around half-chewed Fruit Loops and milk running down his chin. "Why can't he take his own car?"

_Because I want a familiar car around if I have to follow that Singer guy or one of the Winchesters,_ Ishtar thought and forced a smile on her lips.

"Eat up, you'll miss your bus." She said instead of an answer.

When she was alone in the house, finally, with Jerry off to school and Tim with her car on his way to his boring office job, Ishtar breathed in relief.

This would be way easier without the kid around but she had to keep a low profile while she lived next door to a hunter, she reminded herself. A body, especially a kid's body, would draw too much attention.

"But I'll keep that in mind." She muttered to herself and flipped through the paper Tim had left on the kitchen table. She had missed the guy who delivered the paper, she would get him tomorrow, but according to Tim the mailman was due any minute now and she wanted to get at least him.

_And there he is._ Ishtar put on her best smile and went outside to have a little chat. He was a lanky young guy, barely out of his teens and still with more pimples than stubble on his face.

"Morning." She greeted him and shuddered inwardly. The things she did for a little revenge …

"Good morning, ma'am." He even tipped his hat.

"I'm new in the neighborhood." She stepped closer and rearranged her hair to give him a good view on her neck and to send a wave of pheromones in his direction. The way his eyes never came up to eye-level told her it probably was a little bit over the top to play all her cards but better safe than sorry, right?

"I guessed that much." He said with a happy grin. "I would remember if I'd seen you before."

Ishtar fought against the urge to roll her eyes and then gave in because he wouldn't notice with his eyes on her cleavage anyway.

"I take that the salvage yard is on your route as well?" As if there would be a second mailman for the other two houses on this street.

The boy nodded and his hat bounced dangerously on his head.

"Do you want to kiss me?"

His eyes became huge at that question and even bigger when she slipped her tongue in his mouth.

"And now you're going to tell me everything you know about Mr. Singer and his guests."

He couldn't tell her much she didn't already know but promised to keep his eyes open.

"Good boy." She kissed him again and then wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

_Oh, by the way. No need to tell anyone about me, alright?_ , she whispered to him.

"Alright." He replied easily and she watched him leaving.

"That was too easy." She turned to get back in the house when a car came near. Bobby Singer and Sam Winchester, she realized and all of a sudden she trembled in fear. Here she stood right in the open, without a chance to hide and without any weapons. They could shoot her on the spot, they wouldn't even have to get out of the car to kill her.

They drove past her without a second glance in her direction, didn't slow down, just like in that ally. But today Ishtar wasn't wounded, today she wasn't the prey.

She only hesitated for a second before she decided to take the risk. Tim's car belonged here so she hoped it would be invisible to the hunters.

There weren't many directions to go other than farther down this one street so Ishtar caught up with Singer's car quite easily. Following a hunter was a huge risk but she needed to know where they went, who they met. She wasn't exactly sure how she wanted this to end, with all of them dead was her happy ending, but first of all she needed more information. So she followed them. To Walmart.

She parked not too close to them but with a good view on the car and then she waited. It took them a while until they came back and loaded lots and lots of bags in the trunk. She couldn't make out what they'd bought but she guessed four grown men needed some supplies. And she'd overheard Dean saying that Nick had nothing left so he'd need a few things, too.

Then they drove back the direction they'd come from and Ishtar already cursed that she'd taken the risk for nothing but then they turned left and headed for the center of the town.

To her surprise they parked in front of the bookstore she'd noticed the other day, _Inquiring Minds_.

Okay, she'd guessed that this was some kind of hunter related store so it wasn't that big of a surprise.

Unlike her the hunters had no problem entering the store, though.

Ishtar got out of her car and hurried over to the copy shop next door to the bookstore. Pretending to read the advertisements in the window of the shop she tried to glance through the window of the bookstore. The angle was anything but good and she only caught a glimpse of Sam's back for a second. But even without the warding, which was clearly noticeable at this distance, she wouldn't have dared to go over to look directly at the books on display in the other window. Sam had never seen her and Singer had only seen her as that man's, had his name been Ethan?, she wasn't sure, woman of his dreams so she doubted one of them would recognize her but it was still a risk she wasn't willing to take.

The hunters came back out a few minutes later but now they both looked shell-shocked. A black woman stepped out of the door behind them and waved them goodby when they drove off. Next to Sam she had looked tiny but now she seemed to be about average height with a bit of gray in her black curls and the fine lines in her face only accentuated the strong curve of her chin and her alert eyes.

Before she returned inside the woman swept the street with a quick glance and Ishtar felt her gaze linger on her for a second. Holding her breath she waited to be called out, expected that woman to recognize her as not human but then the door closed behind her and she was gone.

Ishtar had to steady herself for a moment by leaning against the window. This woman may not be an active hunter but she knew and she was dangerous, that much was clear.

_Too bad she isn't a guy,_ Ishtar though. It would have been hilarious to sic a fellow hunter on the Winchester. Or at least she could have given Ishtar quite some information. As far as she could tell, bookstore lady was friends with Sam and Singer. Interesting.

Singer was gone and here in the center of the town Ishtar would never catch up with him so she could take her time. Maybe ask some questions.

Shrugging off the uneasy feeling of the warding in general and the bookstore lady specifically Ishtar put her smile back on and entered the copy shop.

It was empty except for the two employees, a man and a woman, chatting behind the counter. The man was more of her liking, around thirty, tall, well build with an easy smile, yeah, she liked what she saw.

Ignoring the woman she went straight for him and by the time she reached the counter he was eye-sexing her already.

With the woman near by with nothing to do than to eavesdrop on them Ishtar couldn't just kiss the guy and ask him about the store next door. But she didn't mind some old school seducing.

"Hi there." He greeted her with a warm smile. "How may I help you?"

"I'm planning this big event." She leaned on the counter to give him a good view into her cleavage. "And I have to make quite some copies for that so I'm checking out some prices now."

She made up random numbers and he gave her the prices along with his number and his lunch break was in about half an hour and why shouldn't they have a coffee over at Starbucks?

So half an hour later she had an overpriced coffee in pleasant company and even without her dosing him up he was willing to answer every question she had. She kissed him anyway, just to make sure, and maybe she just wanted to kiss those sinful lips.

Apparently the bookstore had been there forever, ran by the Blake family and currently owned by Adela Blake. Copy shop guy, she didn't bother to remember his name, had seen some strange people entering the store sometimes at strange hours.

"I'm telling you, some of them look like inbreed redneck serial killers. I'm surprised they can read but I doubt Ms. Blake has books with pictures." He laughed at his own joke but Ishtar didn't feel like laughing. That sounded like hunters. She guessed hunters read a lot about the beings they murdered but this sounded like something different.

"When they come out, these redneck people." She dug deeper. "Does it look like they carry books out or something else?"

That made him thinking. "I don't know. Never really paid attention."

_From now on you will pay attention,_ she whispered. _You keep an eye on that bookstore, you memorize every face going in and you have an eye on what they carry out. You understand?_

"Yes." He smiled at her. They finished their coffee and then Ishtar drove home to Tim and that little brat he had for a son.

Jerry was already home, watching TV and ignoring her when she entered the living room. She could live with that, she had no idea what to do with a child anyway.

"When is your dad going to be home?" She asked but he didn't answer and kept his eyes firmly on the TV.

She sat down at the kitchen table and skimmed through the rest of the paper she'd left there in the morning but the noises from the TV, turned on extra loud just to annoy her, she had no doubt, got on her nerves.

"Don't you have homework to do or something?" She snapped.

"Already done." He answered and nudged the volume up a little more. Unconsciously she shredded the paper to pieces and was about to move on to annoying little boy when the door opened.

"Daddy." The boy flung himself in his father's arms and got an absent hair-tousle and a "Hey, Sports." but Tim's attention wasn't on his son.

"Darling, I'm home." Like a starving man he lunched for her lips and Ishtar smiled.


	24. Chapter 24

When Nick woke up the next time he decided that he slept too much lately. Dean sat on the floor with his back leaning at the couch and he had Nick's hand drawn over his shoulder so he could still entwine their fingers. With his other hand he balanced a coffee mug on his flexed knee.

"Dean?" Nick mumbled drowsily. "Why are you on the floor?"

Dean tilted his head backwards to give him an upside down look.

"Because the couch is too small for both of us." He said it in a matter of fact way as if it was completely normal that Nick needed him around like a child needed his security blanket.

What stunned Nick the most was that Dean just played his security blanket. No snarky comments, no telling him to suck it up. Dean was just there.

"Bobby and Sam are in town, doing the groceries." Dean told him and Nick breathed easier. He wouldn't mind Sam around, quite the opposite, but Bobby was still a stranger.

"Told Sam to bring you some stuff." Dean added. "To get you covered for a few days. We can go shopping as soon as you feel like it."

Nick tried to picture Dean going shopping with him. He had no doubt that Dean would do it, after he'd tried to pass that task on to Sam, but the idea of them together in a clothing store was strange at least. Sam and Dean had never been ashamed of Nick. They'd been to bars and restaurants, to the movies and stuff and the Winchesters had never tried to hide that they were together but this was different. They'd never done something as ordinary as going shopping and the thought of him and Dean doing that as a couple was strange.

Nick rolled to his back and his eyes caught something on the ceiling.

"What's that?" He squinted at the complex drawing, trying to make sense out of the symbols.

Dean followed his line of sight and let out a sigh.

"It's called the Key of Solomon." He answered. "It's a trap for demons."

"Demons?" Nick had somehow accepted the succubus because, hey, hard to deny after what he'd been through, but demons?

Dean came to his feet, sat down on the edge of the couch and took Nick's hand in his. With his thumb he brushed over the pentagram on the bracelet.

"There are a lot of evil sons of bitches out there. Demons for example can possess you. But you can trap and exorcise them." He jerked his head in direction of the ceiling. "Or you protect yourself with this. It's a protection charm against demons."

"So that's what you do?" Nick asked caught between amusement and seriousness. A few days ago he would have called Dean crazy. "You and Sam? You're demon hunters?"

"Demons are rare." Dean shifted, avoiding Nick's eyes but out of the corner of his eye he waited for Nick's reaction. "But yeah, Sam and me? We're hunters. Ghosts, werewolves, vampires, you name it, we hunt it down and kill it."

Nick thought about that, thought about the various injuries he'd seen on both of them over the last year, remembered the phone calls in the middle of the night when one of them had been keeping watch over the barely alive other one.

Dean quirked an eyebrow at him. "What? You're not calling me crazy?"

"Sorry, I'm still too exhausted from the succubus to tell you that ghosts ain't real." Nick answered and for a second he could breathe easily.

"Good point."

"What about Bobby?"

"He doesn't hunt actively that often anymore. I think he's getting old but there isn't much about the supernatural he doesn't know." Dean made a wide gesture around the room. "Everything else is in one of these books."

Nick looked around the room with new interest. "Is there something about … succubuses … succubuss...s? What's the plural of succubus?"

"Succubitches." Dean gave him a smirk. "And sure, Bobby has a book about them somewhere." Dean seemed certain of that but his own look around the room was less confident. "But hell if I know where. Research is Sam's part, he loves it. Sometimes I get the feeling he's cheating on me with an ancient grimoire. If you ever get jealous of a book, don't worry, that's normal."

Nick got up, the movement not as swiftly as it used to be, and after an encouraging nod from Dean he had a look at the nearest shelf of books.

"Bobby keeps saying that there is some kind of order behind his chaos so don't mess around too much." Dean warned him when he took one book out. It was written in what Nick presumed was Latin with woodcut pictures of mystical creatures. Carefully Nick put the book back to its place.

Dean came up behind him and slung his arms around Nick's body. For a second Nick stiffened but then he relaxed into the embrace.

_This is Dean not her,_ he reminded himself.

"If you're interested in this stuff, you should ask Bobby later." Dean said in a low voice, his body warm against Nick's back. "But sometimes it's better not to ask. You can still go back to a normal life."

"What life?" Nick's voice was heavy with sarcasm. "Apparently the police thinks I've murdered my best friend. I can't go back." His breath hitched in his throat when he said it out loud but Dean tightened his hold on him and the moment passed.

"By the way, my two boyfriends are brothers, how normal is that?" Nick stumbled a bit over _boyfriends_ because he wasn't sure if that was the right term anymore but Dean didn't protest. Instead he chuckled and placed a little kiss behind Nick's ear.

They were interrupted by the front door opening. Sam and Bobby were back.

Loaded with shopping bags Sam came into the study and his face lit up when he noticed Nick up and not close to a panic attack for a change. Nick made a face at that thought. When had he become that wimpy?

Sam placed the bags on the desk and caught Dean's lips in a quick kiss.

"Dude, are you nuts?" Dean hissed and brought some distance between himself and Sam.

"Bobby is still struggling with his groceries." Sam assured him and stole another kiss. Then he greeted Nick the same way. This one a bit more hesitantly, a bit more chaste and if he was honest Nick wasn't ready for more at the moment. But he appreciated that neither Sam nor Dean had stopped showing affection. They had dimmed it to a level he could handle but somehow he needed the touches and the little kisses.

"Bought you some things." Sam started unpacking. "I wasn't sure about your size but I hope this will more or less fit."

Nick could only stare at all the things Sam got out of the bags, overwhelmed he dropped in the chair behind the desk.

"I don't know what to say. I'll pay you back as soon as …" As soon as what? He'd found the nearest truck stop to suck some dick? He wasn't sure if he could do that ever again. But it was the only way he knew to earn a few bucks.

"You're not going to pay us anything." Dean interrupted his thoughts. "We stopped paying you and hell if you start paying us now."

To hide his emotions Nick skimmed through the things on the desk. Basic clothes, sneakers, razor, toothbrush and some other things.

"And I found this." Out of another bag Sam produced a large box. "Remember these?"

Nick did remember. The donuts, it was even the same brand, they had eaten the morning after their second night. The morning they had decided to try this out. Okay, Sam and Dean had done the talking while Nick had been gagged with pastry.

"Awesome." Dean ripped the box open and scanned the donuts inside. "Still too many with pinks frosting and sparkles." He took one out and sniffed at it.

_Back then I haven't been damaged goods_ , Nick thought.

"Can it right there." Dean growled at him. "You're not damaged goods."

Ops, did he say that aloud?

Sam picked a donut with chocolate frosting. "Dunno, maybe he is damaged goods."

Nick opened his mouth to say something but Dean used that opportunity to stuff the pink donut between his teeth.

"Be a good boy and hold that for a moment." Dean ordered and snagged himself another one. "That bitch got the drop on me first. You saying I am damaged goods, Sammy?"

Saliva and half-dissolved sugar already pooled in Nick's mouth and he tried to swallow but it was difficult with the donut holding his mouth open. Just like then. The only difference now was that Sam and Dean didn't try to get him off and were holding his hands instead.

"I remember one certain woman in white." Dean nibbled the frosting off his donut. "You were about to get damaged then, too."

Sam chewed thoughtfully. "You got snagged by that shapeshifter in St. Luis."

"He got the drop on you too. Twice." He pointed with his half-eaten pastry at Sam. "And that was a supernatural monster. You got jumped by inbreed humans who put you in a cage."

"Inbreed?" Sam raised an eyebrow and licked frosting off his thumb. "Really, Dean?"

"It's not that we can breed." He shrugged it off. Nick fought against the chuckle building up in his chest which turned into the urge to cough when the sugar mixture swapped deeper into his throat.

"And I got out of the cage by myself." Sam reminded his brother. "Just in time to save you from a thirteen year old girl."

"She was put in charge after her daddy and her two retarded brothers tied me up." Dean defended himself with his mouth full. They ate in silence for a moment while Nick sucked the donut deeper in his mouth to get a not sodden part between his teeth.

"He does get panic attacks." Dean reached into the box.

"Demon. On. A. Plane." Sam emphasized every word and Dean's hand froze in mid-air.

"I can always play dress up with Nick and call him Bozo." Dean took the last chocolate donut. "I have a red wig and I'm not afraid to use it." He threatened and Sam visibly paled.

"Okay, we're all damaged." Sam gave in.

In that moment the donut in Nick's mouth finally broke and Nick was left with a mouth full of soaked through pastry. But Sam was ready and caught the rest before it dropped to the floor.

Letting go of Nick's hand he broke the piece in half and gave one part to Dean. They saluted Nick with the pieces and then ate them in unison.

Nick thumbed some leftover frosting from his lips. He didn't understand most of what they had just said but he thought he got the point of this little charade.

"Are you trying to tell me that we are the damaged parts of a pink frosted donut with sparkles?"

"More or less." Sam shrugged.

"Without the pink frosting and the sparkles." Dean swallowed the last bit. "We're not that gay."

By the time Bobby joined them in the study they were innocently eating their donuts. Nick had more questions now than ever, Sam and Dean had referred to so many events he knew nothing about, but apparently they had been through some rough spots themselves. That gave him hope that he could deal with what had happened. Eventually.

"I don't believe it." Bobby interrupted the comfortable silence. "Leaving me with the groceries while you stuff yourselves with donuts. What am I? Your housekeeper?"

"Uhm, sorry?" Sam ducked his head with a sheepish grin and seemed to have no idea what to do with his half-eaten donut. Dean solved the problem with snatching it from his brother and stuffing it in his own mouth.

"Nick needed me here." Dean said while he chewed. "You don't want me to leave Nick alone, don't you?"

Bobby adjusted his cap with a sigh. His eyes locked on to Nick.

"You sure you know what you got yourself into with these two?"


	25. Chapter 25

Bobby shook his head and tried to hide his amusement when Sam picked up all the things he'd bought for Nick and stuffed them back in the bags in a haste.

"I bring them upstairs." He announced, already on his way out of the room. "You can try them on later."

"Thanks, Sam." Nick said.

Bobby had only heard a few words out of this young man's mouth and it was strange to hear an unfamiliar voice in his house. But Nick was part of Dean's life and as such part of Sam's life as well and that made him part of Bobby's life. The boys were family and Bobby had no intention to change that any time soon. Maybe it was because Dean hadn't told him about Nick but Bobby was determined to show that he was okay with the situation.

"So, what were you two up to while Sam and I were out?" Bobby sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk and gestured for Nick to stay where he was. Nick had already jumped half out of his chair and only plopped down after an encouraging nod from Dean.

"Gave Nick a little 101 on monsters." Dean put the box with the few remaining donuts aside and wiped powdered sugar from an old manuscript Bobby had been working on. Wincing inwardly Bobby kept his mouth shut, he didn't want to risk another meltdown by snarling at Dean in front of Nick.

"Nick asked about succubitches."

Okay, that he could work with. "What do you want to know?"

"Everything." Nick answered with a shy smile and a hard look in his eyes. For a second he reminded Bobby of a young John Winchester all those years ago. Every hunter had his story, maybe this was Nick's. He hoped not but this was not his decision to make.

"Alright." Bobby said but threw a glance in Dean's direction to figure out what he thought about this. Dean made a _go ahead_ gesture and then knocked himself out with a car magazine.

Mentally Bobby went through his books, searching for a _Succubi for Dummies_ as a start. They could build up from there. He doubted Nick could read Latin but he had a few translations of the medieval bestiaries which mentioned succubi.

At first Nick just listened to Bobby's explanations and read quietly the texts Bobby gave him. During all that Dean never left Nick's side. Their legs touched in a way that could be accidentally but wasn't and from time to time Nick looked up from his book as if he wanted to make sure that Dean was still there. And to Bobby's surprise Dean just sat there with his magazine and didn't bolt like he usually did when Bobby got the books out.

After a while Nick seemed to warm up to Bobby, though. He started to ask questions on his own.

"What does this mean?" Nick pointed at the line he didn't understand and read it aloud. "The succubus is known to whisper to a man's mind?"

"That refers to their ability to place suggestions in your head." Bobby explained. "You could say it's a kind of hypnosis. She influenced your landlord that way. Now he swears up and down that he never saw her. Only you leaving the crime scene." Bobby chose his words carefully, aware that they were on the same thin ice once again. "That's how she left that message for Dean, too." He added to get Nick's mind off his dead friend. Which was a mistake.

"What message?" Nick tried to play it cool but Bobby saw the panic flicker in his eyes.

"She said." Dean put the magazine down he hadn't been as engrossed in as it had seemed. "That now she has broken you, we're even."

Bobby wasn't sure if it was the right move to tell Nick the complete message and for a moment Nick clearly fought with his emotions but then he set his jaw and his eyes went cold.

"She didn't break me."

"That's my boy." Dean said with pride and Nick kicked his shin.

Watching them Bobby sat back with a smile. Nick showed some very familiar characteristics, no wonder he got along with the Winchester brothers so well.

After that the ice seemed to be broken. Nick came alive and before he knew it books piled on the desk and Bobby was in a deep discussion with this bright young man. Nick lacked knowledge of the supernatural but he drew the right conclusions on his own and Bobby had to admit that Nick's fresh view on some things lead him to some questions Bobby hadn't thought of before.

During all this Dean sat quietly with them and pretended to read his magazine but kept a watchful eye on Nick. He stayed until Sam took his place. Nick didn't even seem to notice that his leg wasn't pressed against Dean's anymore, he leaned equally comfortable on Sam.

"Dinner is ready." Dean yelled from the kitchen. Surprised Bobby looked up from the article they had been discussing to find that it had become dark by now. At some point Dean must have switched the lights on without him noticing.

They followed the aroma of warmed up chili, that's how it tastes the best anyway, to the kitchen where Dean had set the table and was busy slicing bread. Neither of them had eaten since breakfast, if he didn't count the donuts, so Bobby's stomach wasn't the only one grumbling in anticipation.

Nick sat between Sam and Dean, where he seemed to be most comfortable, and for the first time he actually ate with appetite. They had the last four donuts for dessert and by then Nick was blinking sluggishly against his dropping eyelids.

"Okay, buddy. Time for bed." Dean helped Nick to his feet who didn't protest and leaned heavily on Dean instead.

Bobby watched them as they made their way out of the kitchen, both moving a little stiff and slower than they should at their age.

"Looks like they left us the dishes." Bobby observed but had no intention to do something about the dirty dishes on the table and in the sink at the moment.

Sam hmmed and didn't move either.

"Nick is a brilliant young man." Bobby said into the silence. During the afternoon Nick had let slip that he hadn't finished school and Bobby couldn't help but wonder what had led to that. How did a boy like Nick end up as a prostitute?

_The same way somebody ends up as a hunter,_ he guessed with a sigh. _Life happened._

"He is." Sam answered with a delay, caught up in his own thoughts.

"Don't get me wrong, Nick can stay as long as he wants. I'm happy to have you all here." Bobby emphasized the last part. "But that's not a long-term solution."

"I know." Sam stood up and let water in the sink.

"You've seen him earlier. How he soaked it all up. He's already on his way to become a hunter." Bobby carried the plates over and dropped them in the soapy water. He didn't mention how much Nick reminded him of John.

"I know." Sam repeated. "But it's his decision."

"I'm just saying that he should know he has options." Bobby took the first plate and dried it off. "Right now it may look to him like it's either going back to what he did before." He didn't want to think too closely about how this nice young man offered himself to strangers. "Or taking his place in the back seat of the Impala as a hunter in training."

If he was honest Bobby couldn't think of any other options at the moment but he didn't know Nick as well as Sam did. He couldn't quite picture Nick as a waiter or something like that, though.

"How about we let him come around first before we think about that?" Sam suggested. "Have you heard anything about that succubus? I'd really like to get my hands on that bitch."

Usually Sam wasn't the Winchester who was prone to going ballistic but now there was murder in his eyes. But the succubus had had her hands on Dean and Nick so far and Bobby wouldn't mind getting his hands on her either.

"I have my ears out." He answered and wiped his hands. "So far nothing."

They settled down in the study, each of them with a beer and a book, because it was far too early to turn in. However, there was only silence from upstairs so Bobby guessed Dean and Nick were both asleep by now.

"You and Nick get along quite well." Bobby broke the silence after a while.

"Guess so." Sam looked up from his book, his expression carefully guarded. "Why?"

"I don't want to pry about thinks I have no business with." Bobby said, not sure how to phrase his question. "But wasn't it weird at first? I mean when Dean brought Nick home the first times."

The times Dean had paid. Which led to the question if Dean brought hookers back home often. Male hookers. How long had Sam known that Dean liked men? Did Dean know that Sam wasn't averse to men either? Did they even share a hooker at times?

At that point Bobby forced himself to jump off that train of thoughts. It went to places he absolutely didn't want to go.

"Dunno." Sam shrugged at Bobby's question. "We all kinda grew into it." He closed his book but marked the page with his finger. "What about you? Isn't it weird for you? Dean and Nick and what Adela blurted out about me?"

"To be honest, I would have never pictured Dean The Lady's Man Winchester going steady with another man." Bobby admitted. "But where is this coming from that you and Dean both think that I won't be okay with it? I don't get it. Have I ever said something? Did something?" This question had been gnawing at him since he'd found out about Nick.

"Is it because of what Nick does for a living?" Because that was the closest thing to an explanation he had come up so far. But hunters lived at the outskirts of society anyway so was it really a surprise that Dean had found Nick there?

"It's not that." Now Sam seemed really uncomfortable.

"What is it then?" Slowly Bobby was losing his patience. "Because I can't repeat myself more often. I don't care who you love, man, woman, it doesn't matter as long as you're happy."

There was a flicker in Sam's eyes as if he wanted to disagree but then he let out a sigh.

"I guess it just never really came up." Sam finally answered. "And we never thought that you wouldn't be okay with this. You wouldn't kick us out for this."

There was a deeper meaning behind these words, that much was clear and not for the first time this day Bobby thought about John Winchester. Dean and Nick hadn't been together when he'd still been alive but Bobby doubted this was Dean's first time with a man. And Sam most likely had experiences with men as well. How would John have reacted to one or even two of his sons coming out to him? Not good, Bobby guessed.

That explained a lot and Bobby wanted to kick himself for not making this connection sooner. He still wished that Dean would have told him but he got it now.


	26. Chapter 26

After dinner Dean and Nick made their way slowly up the stairs.

"I feel like I'm ninety." Nick admitted when they finally reached the top. His body was stiff from sitting all afternoon and the last helping of hot chili had left him warm and sleepy. He just wasn't sure if he could sleep alone in his bed and wondered if he should simply ask Dean if they could share a bed again.

"You certainly aged well." Dean joked but his movements weren't that smooth either.

When Dean opened the door to the guest room Nick was suddenly wide awake again.

"What …?" He stammered at the sight of the rearrange room. "When …? Why …?"

The two beds now stood as one in the middle of the room with the nightstands on its sides. Next to him Dean let out a chuckle but became earnest the next second.

"I hope this is okay for you." He said and suddenly he sounded uncertain. "I thought that if we end up in the same bed anyway we could at least make sure that the bed is big enough for both of us."

Nick didn't know what to say.

"I can get them apart in less than a minute if you like that better." Dean hurried to say when Nick just stared.

"Thank you." Was all Nick could think off and placed a little kiss on Dean's cheek.

"Awesome." Dean smiled like he'd landed the biggest coup ever. "Let's get ready for bed, then. I'm beat."

Nick brushed his teeth with his new toothbrush. He would have never guessed that he would be happy to have his own toothbrush but somehow it helped him to feel like a real person again.

When he came back to their room he found a bare-chested Dean bent over his bag in search for a t-shirt for the night. Normally Nick would appreciate that kind of view but now he felt sick.

Dean had bruises. A lot of them. Some so dark they seemed black, some hand-shaped. And scratches from fingernails. Bite marks. All over his upper body and more were hidden under the sweatpants he was wearing, Nick had no doubt.

_I did this to him._ A new wave of guilt washed over him.

"I'd like to check the marks she left on your back." Dean put the t-shirt on and gave Nick a concerned look. "I know you're not exactly comfortable with showing skin right now but we need to make sure nothing gets infected."

Numbly Nick sat down on the bed and lifted his shirt far enough for Dean to check his wounds. He was exposed and Dean was behind him and Nick closed his eyes and focused on breathing until Dean carefully smoothed the shirt back down.

"Looks good." Dean scrambled around to sit next to Nick. For some reason Nick breathed easier when Dean wasn't behind him anymore.

"How about the other thing?" Dean asked, gesturing at Nick's lower part. "Everything okay?"

"It's fine." For a second Nick feared that Dean wanted to have a look at that as well but Dean only looked at him for moment and then seemed to be satisfied.

"Let's turn in then."

They lay down next to each other, close but without touching. Nick had his back to Dean and he wanted nothing more than for Dean to spoon behind him but he didn't dare to ask. After he'd seen what he'd done to Dean how could he ever ask for anything ever again? Those bruises told the story of violent sex, of rape.

Nick on the other hand had nothing worse than strained muscles and a tender dick which meant that Dean hadn't even fought back.

"Why haven't you said anything?" Nick finally asked.

"About the beds?" Dean asked back, not sleeping either. "You were busy geeking out with Sam and Bobby, you looked happy. I didn't want to interrupt you."

"That's not what I mean." He rolled to his other side, facing Dean. "About the fact that you're one gigantic walking bruise."

"Don't worry about that. It's nothing, I'd worse." Dean sounded almost amused.

"But …"

"Shh, nothing but." He stroke Nick's cheek gently and for a second Nick wondered how Dean could even find his face in the dark. "I'm okay, we're okay."

Nick wanted to believe that but how could they be okay if Nick himself wasn't okay? Deep down Nick knew that he wasn't okay, maybe would never be okay ever again. What she'd done to him went deeper than the physical act. It was an open wound on his soul, raw and bleeding.

"Could you just hold me?" The tears were back but he let them run freely.

Dean didn't answer, he simply drew him closer. Cupping Nick's head with one hand and placing his other one in the middle of Nick's back, Dean just hold him.

Face buried in Dean's chest Nick cried himself to sleep.

When Nick woke up the next morning, the room was flooded in bright sunlight, Dean was spooning warm behind him with one arm thrown over Nick, still holding him close, and his morning wood pressed against Nick's ass.

It took a while for the last bit of information to sink in but when Nick finally realized that it was the outline of Dean's erection he felt though the fabric between them, he went from drowsy to wide awake in a heartbeat. His first reaction was to jump out of the bed, away from Dean, but that would wake Dean and then he would notice his current state and then everything would become awkward. Dean may would refuse to sleep in the same bed with him to prevent future incidents like this. Or maybe not but it would still be awkward as hell.

Nick shifted a little bit to make sure that he really was feeling what he thought he was feeling but yes, this wasn't Dean's hand or anything like this. Dean's penis, erected, there was no doubt about that and due to Nick's shifting it now rested between his ass cheeks.

Dean mumbled something in his sleep, rolled his hips a little bit and then he let out a happy sigh.

Nick's chest tightened. He couldn't do this. Panic rose again but he fought against it. All he had to do was to get out of the bed without waking Dean. Easy as pie. He just needed to breathe nice and slow and everything would be fine.

Carefully he lifted Dean's arm far enough to get out from under it and then Nick rolled out of the bed. Dean smacked his lips and blindly searched for Nick but then settled down again without waking. Nick tiptoed out of the room and only breathed easier when he'd locked the bathroom door behind himself. Shaking he sat on the rim of the bathtub before he felt steady enough for a shower.

The hot water, he nudged the temperature up until he could barely stand the heat, washed away the strains she had left on him and when he came out of the shower his skin burned and felt raw but clean. At least for the moment.

He hadn't thought of clean clothes when he'd left the guest room and he didn't want to go back and risk waking Dean. So Nick put his sleeping clothes back on and went downstairs in search for a coffee. Like the day before Nick followed the aroma of fresh coffee but there was nobody in the kitchen.

There were voices coming from the front door, tough. One he identified as Bobby's but the other one wasn't Sam's and Nick wasn't in the mood to deal with new people so he helped himself with some coffee first. Bobby and the other person kept talking the next few minutes and Nick had to admit he was a little bit curious. It was still early in the morning, Sam and Dean were both still asleep, so who was this early visitor? Somehow Nick doubted this was a customer for the salvage yard.

Making sure that he couldn't be seen from the front door Nick glanced around the corner. Bobby blocked his view on the visitor, he only caught a glimpse of a khaki-clad leg and a shoulder dressed in the same color. That combined with the fact that Bobby was holding a newspaper, Nick didn't need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure this one out.

Relieved, the newspaper guy wouldn't come in or even stay for longer, Nick returned to the kitchen where he nursed his coffee until Bobby came back.

"Well, somebody is chatty today." Bobby threw the paper on the table and went for a coffee. "Three years and he barely gets out a good morning and today he's rattling like a machine gun."

"Something to worry about?" Nick asked and hold his cup out for a refill.

"Na." Bobby made a dismissive gesture. "He just saw Dean's car and couldn't stop cooing over it. Good thing Dean wasn't there or they would be talking shop till noon."

"Probably." Nick smiled. Dean loved talking about cars in general and his car in specific but sadly Nick was with Sam on this one. A car was one of those things with four wheels, right?

"Dean's still sleeping?" Bobby cracked the first egg into the pan. Looked like breakfast would be the same as yesterday, scrambled eggs, bacon and toast but Nick didn't mind. He hadn't eaten much of his breakfast the other day anyway.

"Like a baby." Nick rolled the cup between his hands. A baby with morning wood and there was so much wrong with that thought that Nick forced himself to think of something else. Which brought the sight of Dean's battered body back to his mind.

"Something wrong?" Spatula in hand Bobby eyed him from under his cap.

"I hurt Dean." It was out of his mouth before he knew it. "Pretty bad. He's bruised all over." He didn't mention the scratches and bite marks, that would have been too embarrassing.

Bobby cleared his throat and a part of Nick expected him to yell at him, to throw him out of his house. But Bobby sat down next to Nick without saying anything for a moment.

"Okay, listen son." Bobby finally spoke. "First, you were under the influence of the venom, you had no control over what you did. Second, Dean is a big boy who knows how to defend himself. I'm pretty sure he kept you from hurting him too much. And last, you've been with him for a year now. I really don't wanna know details but when you two were together you must have seen injuries on him before. That boy can't go the length of a week without getting banged up."

Nick couldn't help but smile at the last part. And Bobby was right Nick had seen Dean, and Sam too, in worse conditions. Nick remembered cuts and bruises, phone calls late in the night from the one sitting vigil at the other one's bed. Dean was right, he had worse. However, this time it had been Nick who'd done this to him.

One of the phones started ringing.

"Balls." Bobby glance at the clock on the wall. "Do they know what time it is?"

He stood up and handed Nick the spatula.

"I have to get this. Keep an eye on the eggs, would ya?"

Dumbfounded Nick took the kitchen utensil and stepped over to the stove. Scrambled eggs couldn't be that hard, right? Uncertainly he poked at the mess in the pan while behind him Bobby answered the call.

"Agent Willis." He said with authority in his voice and not for the first time Nick wondered what he'd gotten himself into.


	27. Chapter 27

_I should probably start a list of all my little puppies,_ Ishtar thought and pressed Tim's head firmer between her thighs, claws scratching over Tim's scalp. _And find a place to meet my little eyes and ears, too bad you can't deliver a kiss over the phone._

Except for Tim, who still struggled with the finer points of eating pussy, she noticed with a growl, she had the men bound to her with just a kiss. Which meant they wouldn't feel any side effects of her venom but it would wear off if she didn't refresh her mark on them regularly.

"What the hell are you doing down there?"

He knelt on the floor at the end of the bed with his face buried between her legs but that was about all he did right.

"I'm eating you out." He came up long enough to answer her question before he dug back in. He didn't lack enthusiasm, she had to give him that.

"You better get me off soon or you won't come all day." She threatened which he commented with a needy whine that drove the right vibrations through her clit. But then he was back to his useless lapping at all the wrong places.

_Too bad for him,_ she thought with a shrug.

It was Saturday and they could have stayed in bed all day but she couldn't feed off him too much anyway and that little brat was somewhere in the house, too. So no lazy sex Saturday today. She let out a frustrated sigh. Was it asking too much to have one orgasm before breakfast?

"Stop it." She kicked him hard enough for him to topple over and for a moment he lay on his back like some kind of bug with flailing arms and legs. And a bouncing excuse for a penis.

"Why do I get all the pussies lately who don't know squat about eating pussy?" Little fuck toy Nicky had an excuse for not being familiar with the female layout but Timmy here? How had he managed knock his ex-wife up? One lucky guess?

"Bet I know why she wanted the divorce. You are a loser in bed, Timmy."

"Please, I can make it right. Please." He crawled back to her like they always did. Licking and kissing his way back up her leg he begged for her forgiveness.

"Get me one of your ties." She ordered and smiled at how eagerly he went to fetch her what she wanted. Like a stupid little dog.

"On the bed. On your back."

He stretched out for her, his little tail wagging in anticipation. She grabbed it and squeezed the base of his shaft.

"Please." He keened and bucked into her fist. "Please, I need it. Please."

"I know what you need." She looped the tie around his junk. "But you have to work for it. Don't move."

First a loop around everything, then two around the base of his cock, another two around his balls and finally one around everything again before she tied it down. Tightly.

Ishtar sat back on her heels to admire her work. With the blood trapped in it, his erection grew and within seconds it leaned more to the purple side of red.

A fine layer of sweat covered Tim's entire body and his hands twitched, unconsciously reaching for his tortured cock but so far he followed her order to not move.

"Do I have to tie you up completely?" Ishtar asked and Tim shook his head violently, fisting the sheets until his knuckles went white.

"Good." Ishtar straddled him, slowly lowering herself down on him. By the time she was fully seated he made little pained noises. She rolled her hips experimentally and felt the knot of the tie exactly where she wanted it. Ishtar leaned forward and kissed him deeply.

"Looks like the tie is doing a better job than you." She whispered in his ear. "I'm going to ride you now. And I'm going to come on you like this."

At least he was a passable fuck toy. In the end she had to clamp his mouth shut to keep him from screaming too loudly, she didn't want Jerry to hear, when her inner muscles worked his cock.

"That was fun." She collapsed on top of him and let him slip out.

"Please, take it off." He begged hoarsely. "Please, please take it off."

"I don't know." She rolled off him and let her fingertips ghost over his wet shaft from the tied base to the purple tip. His whole body went rigid under her touch and he bit back another scream. "You look good like this."

"Please, please." He was reduced to that one word, writhing under her hand.

"This is going to hurt." She clamped his mouth shut once again and loosened the tie. The blood started to circulate freely again and he screamed under her hand. When she grabbed his cock and started to jack him, he trashed in agony but she held him in an iron grip.

"You wanted to come." She reminded him sweetly. "You are going to come."

When she was done with him she left him on the bed, where he lay wrung out and barely conscious, and went for a shower. She needed to wash the come and the snot and the tears off.

"Where's Daddy?" Jerry asked when she came downstairs a little while later. By then Tim hadn't actually moved.

"He wants to sleep a little bit longer today." She told the kid. "What are you eating? Fruit Loops again? Mind if I take a bowl too? I'm hungry."

She fixed herself a bowl and sat down with him but Jerry hurried to finish his breakfast and then retreated to his room.

Ishtar shrugged at that, she had no idea what to do with the kid anyway.

Eating her breakfast she thought about the less than ideal situation. The kid was in the way and she couldn't risk killing him. There was Tim's ex-wife, though. Yeah, that sounded good. Jerry could live with his mother for a while. That way he could get used to it, his father wouldn't be around for long anyway.

With the kid out of the house she could play with her little pet as much as she wanted. Satisfied she drank the last bit of milk out of the bowl.

Finally Tim made his way downstairs, a stupid smile on his face.

_Does he always take this long to recover?_ , Ishtar wondered and hoped not. Maybe she should have picked someone with more stamina. But this was not about stamina, this was about location, location, location, she reminded herself.

"What have I done to deserve you?" He asked and stole a kiss.

No stamina but cheesy lines, Ishtar rolled her eyes and didn't answer. At least he made coffee, strong and hot.

"I was thinking." She stirred sugar in the cup he'd placed in front of her.

"Yeah, honey?"

"Maybe we should send Jerry to live with your ex-wife." She sat flat out and expected him to agree. Instead he frowned at her.

"We can't do that." He said with visible effort, the conflict between her order and whatever obstacle was in the way clearly written all over his face.

"Why not?" It would have been too easy. She sighed. Whatever the reason was, Tim didn't think it was possible for Jerry to live with his mother.

"She's in the Navy, she's overseas a lot." Tim said and avoided her eye. "She is right now actually."

Okay, that ruled the mother out.

"What about your parents?" She asked. "Could they take Jerry for a while?"

Now they reached uncomfortable terrain. Tim fiddled with his cup.

"My mother." He cleared his throat. "She died a few years ago. Cancer. And my dad is in a nursing home. Alzheimer."

"I'm sorry." Ishtar said mechanically. "Any other relatives?"

"I'm a single child." He answered and now he looked her in the eye. At some level he was aware of what she was trying to do. "Please, it's just us, me and Jerry. We don't have anybody else. Please don't take him away. Please."

"Shh, I won't." She cupped his face and kissed him, slipped her tongue in his mouth, exploring, caressing, and he relaxed into her touch.

"Thank you." He whispered with tears in his eyes.

_Nobody who would take that little brat in,_ she thought and let out another sigh. Great, she was stuck with the kid.

She wasn't planning on staying here forever, she was hoping to find an opening for her revenge any day now, so she just had to work around the kid. He avoided her as much as possible already so that shouldn't be that big of a problem, right?

The next time she passed Jerry's room, she noticed that he watched her through the ajar door.

"What are you looking at?" She forced the door farther open and looked down on him.

"I heard you." He didn't budge. "You want to send me away, you want my daddy all for yourself. But guess what, lady? My dad won't do that."

"I noticed."

"What do you want?" He asked bluntly. "What do you want from my dad?"

He set his jaw and had his arms crossed in front of his chest and Ishtar caught a glimpse of the man he would become one day. Not a wuss like his father, maybe he took after his mother. In a few years Ishtar could have quite some fun with him, she bet.

"You don't like me, I get that." With him in the house she should at least come to some kind of truce with him. With a hunter headquarter next door she couldn't let herself get distracted by an angry nine-year-old. "I don't like you either but we're stuck here together. So yeah, this sucks."

He stared at her, that wasn't quite what he'd expected but she wasn't here to make friends with him. She wasn't his mother and she didn't want that place in his life.

"But I'm telling you a secret." She crouched to get on eye-level with him. "I won't stay for long. A couple of days, a few weeks at the most. You think we can go that long without ripping each other's throats out?"

She wasn't sure if she could hold her end of that deal but it would certainly help if he wasn't constantly trying to annoy her.

"And you will leave?" He pressed, not really convinced.

"I have something to do in town." She answered honestly. "And I need a place to stay for the time being. I'm not really interested in your father."

He cocked his head at that. "That sounded differently earlier."

"You heard us?" Okay, that was a little bit embarrassing. Did he even know what he'd heard?

"Duh!" He made. "I think the neighbors heard you."

Little smart mouth.

"Yeah … ehm … me and your daddy …" She was not going to tell him about the birds and the bees. Absolutely not. "We have some adult fun from time to time."

"You're having sex." He stated.

Okay, no need for the Talk.

"Aren't you a little young to know about that?" She'd never really bothered with children, men became interesting to her when they were … well … men.

"The internet?" He looked at her as if she was stupid. Again. And she fought against the urge to wipe that look off his face with her claws. Again.

"Honey?" Tim asked for her from downstairs and he already had this whiny tone in his voice.

"I'm here." She yelled back without turning her eyes from Jerry. "You think we can just ignore each other for a little while? I'll be gone before you know it."

He didn't really had a choice and he knew it. As a kid he was doomed to just live with whatever decision his father made.

"Keep it down next time." He closed the door in her face.


	28. Chapter 28

After a few days Nick felt better. The evidence on his body faded as it did on Dean's. When there was no trace left, then it was like it had never happened, right?

During the day he kept himself busy, Bobby's books were good for that. There was so much evil out there, so many things to learn, and he absorbed everything. Succubi were still on the top of his list and he wanted to know everything there was to know about them but he wasn't picky about the rest. He spent hours with Sam or Bobby or both of them reading, discussing, learning.

Okay, he got a little bit anxious when neither Dean nor Sam were in the same room with him and yeah, he had a panic attack or maybe two but he got better. He didn't need constant physical contact anymore, most of the time, and over the day he could go for hours without thinking about _her_.

The nights were a different thing. With nothing left to do than to stare into the darkness surrounding him, he couldn't hold the thoughts and memories at bay. It took him hours to fall asleep and more often than not his dreams woke him up in the middle of the night. But Dean was always there, holding him.

And there wasn't another boner incident which certainly was a plus.

Nick woke up early with Dean still asleep pressed at his back and even in his sleep Dean had his arm protectively thrown over Nick. Over the last few days Nick had perfected the art of slipping out of the bed without waking Dean and he went for a shower.

That had become his morning routine. He tip-toed out of the room, had a shower as hot as he could stand and maybe even a little hotter than that and then he went downstairs where he would find Bobby and some much needed coffee.

He could get used to this, had gotten used to this already, but there was this little voice in his head that grew louder with every day telling him that this wasn't the solution. He couldn't go on like this forever. Sam and Dean had a busy life, had people to save and monsters to kill, and he was holding them back. And Bobby was a nice guy but he wouldn't want Nick to stay in his house forever.

But every time Nick thought about his future he only saw a big, black hole of nothingness. He couldn't go back to his old life, his best friend was dead and he wasn't sure if he could ever work the streets again. Not at the moment, anyway. He could barely take his shirt off in front of Dean and he could tolerate a touch from Sam or Dean, in fact he needed those touches, but as soon as the one touching him was out of his line of sight things became difficult.

"Everything okay, boy?" Bobby looked up from his newspaper when Nick entered the kitchen. There was a steaming mug of coffee waiting for him so Bobby had gotten used to their little morning routine as well which ghosted a little smile on Nicks face. With a sigh he slipped in his seat and breathed in the aroma of the coffee. Everything looked better with coffee.

"You didn't sleep well?" Bobby guessed and Nick wondered if he was referring to the shadows under his eyes or if Nick had woken up with a scream in the middle of the night. He had woken up a couple of times but he couldn't tell if he had screamed or not.

Nick hmpfed into his coffee and was glad when Bobby didn't push it. He nursed his coffee and nibbled at a piece of toast but Nick didn't feel like eating today. If he was honest he didn't feel like anything today. So he was glad when Sam strolled in not much later, still in his sleepwear and with bed-hair.

Bobby showed Sam an article he'd found in the newspaper and a minute later they were discussing if this was worth checking out and if it was what it could be. Nick didn't listen in to the conversation, his mind was floating somewhere in gray fog and for the moment he was content with not thinking at all.

At some point Dean came into the kitchen and he stroke Nick's hair when he said "Morning". He sat down next to Nick with their knees touching and that drew him back out of this floaty state of mind.

"You wanna check this out?" Dean asked Bobby without bothering to swallow the half-chewed bacon in his mouth first.

"It's probably nothing but I think I'm going to have a look. You never know." Bobby finished his coffee and above his head Sam and Dean exchanged a look. Nick knew exactly what they were thinking. With Bobby in the house they had to be careful with showing affection and even Nick had to remind himself that Sam was a good friend and not his boyfriend as long as Bobby was around.

It would be good to just be himself without constantly thinking about how his interaction with Sam would look to Bobby for a while. And there was the sex, of course. It was the last thing Nick wanted to do right now but Sam and Dean didn't have any action in a while, too. Nick didn't want to participate at the moment, even watching them was probably too much, but he wouldn't mind if Sam and Dean were going at it as soon as Bobby was out of the house.

"Sam." Bobby interrupted Nick's thoughts. "I'd like you to come with me on this."

"Ehm … I …" Sam threw his brother a helpless glance. "This doesn't sound like much. Probably a bust anyway."

"Maybe." Bobby pondered that for a moment. "But if not I would like to have some backup around."

Sam opened his mouth to protest but closed it without saying a word. And that was it.

They finished breakfast and less than an hour later Sam and Bobby left the house. If this turned out to be what they called a hunt they could be gone for a few days.

On the porch they said their goodbyes and to Nick's knowing eye it was obvious how much Sam and Dean had to restrain themselves to not hug and kiss. Instead Dean slipped in his big brother role, reminding Sam to be careful and to not take candies from strangers.

"Yeah, yeah." Bobby finally interrupted them. "And I'm going to make sure that he puts on warm socks, too. Can we go now?"

"The old man gets grumpy." Dean observed but waved his brother to leave already.

Sam hugged Nick and whispered an "I love you." in his ear and then Nick watched them drive away until they disappeared behind the old car wrecks.

"Looks like it's just the two of us now." Dean said and slung an arm around Nick's shoulder. Caught by surprise Nick stiffened for a second but then he huddled against Dean.

They went inside and Nick buried himself in the study. Dean sat nearby doing gun maintenance, the smell of the gun oil and the soft clicking of metal against metal reminding Nick that Dean was there.

Nick stared blindly at the pages and by the time Dean brought him a sandwich for dinner he had no idea what he'd done the last few hours. Judging but the worried expression on Dean's face he'd most likely stared at the same page for hours.

"We could watch some TV." Dean suggested while they ate their sandwiches. "Whatever you want just tell me."

All of a sudden it was too much. Dean stood too close to him, the room seemed to close in on him and the lingering smell of gun oil mixed with dust and leather threatened to suffocate him.

"I need fresh air." Nick dropped his half-eaten sandwich on the plate and bolted for the door. "Alone."

Nick breathed easier when he had some piles of old cars between himself and the house, when Dean couldn't see him anymore. He wandered aimlessly through the labyrinth of junk cars, hands buried deep in his pockets. The wind was chilly and he had forgotten to take his jacket with him but he didn't really feel the cold settling in his body.

Nick had no idea what was wrong with him today. The feeling of floating was back, his mind drifted in comfortable silence, disconnected from his body.

"Nick, hey man." Suddenly Dean was there. Why couldn't he leave him alone for five fucking minutes? But then Nick noticed how dark it already was. Had he been out here for hours?

"C'mon, let's get back inside." Dean coaxed him back towards the house. "You're all cold. How about a hot shower while I make us something to eat?"

Dean was babbling and that freaked Nick out because it meant that Dean was freaking out.

"Hey, it's okay." Dean rubbed Nick's chest and the warmth of his hand seeped through the thin t-shirt Nick was wearing. "Just breathe, you're good. Everything is fine."

Nick wasn't sure about the logistics behind this but not soon after that he stood naked under the hot spray of the shower. It didn't help against the cold inside of him. He still felt floaty and disconnected and wrong.

Nick wiped the mirror clean to look himself in the eye. He had no idea who the person was looking back at him and with a strangled cry Nick dropped to his knees. Arms slung tightly around himself, hugging himself, he rocked back and forth. His left knee had landed on something hard but it was a distant feeling not really connected to himself. But the pain grew with his rocking and it slowly pierced through the fog clogging his mind.

Nick froze. He felt his body, it was his again, he was there. Everything was so clear all of a sudden. The pain was like an anchor, grounding him, something he could hold on to.

But the pain rose farther, beyond the point where it helped him focus, and Nick shifted to get his knee off whatever he was kneeling on. His jeans, he realized, more precisely the buckle of the belt. With the pain gone he felt himself losing his focus again.

Nick licked his lips. Finally he knew what he needed and he felt a little bit stupid that he hadn't made the connection sooner. It wasn't that this was new to him.

Carefully he freed the belt out of the loops. Now he only needed to convince Dean.

Right on cue Dean knocked at the door.

"Nick, you alright?" He asked through the door. "You're scaring me here, man."

"Come in." Nick said with a dry mouth and even to his ears his voice sounded strange. Dean opened the door and stopped dead as soon as he spotted Nick.

Kneeling naked on the floor Nick bowed his head and stretched out his arms, presenting the belt to Dean.

"You have to be kidding me." Dean sounded somewhat muffled and Nick didn't need to look up at him to know that he was rubbing his face in disbelief.

"Please, sir." Suddenly Nick's voice was steady again. "I need it."

Dean stepped closer but didn't say anything for a long moment.

"You sure about this?"

"Yes, sir."

Dean took the belt from his hands.

"Please, I need it, sir." Nick didn't move, arms still stretched out he waited for Dean's orders.

"What is your safe-word?"

"Red, sir."


	29. Chapter 29

Upstairs a door went and shortly after that the shower started. Like every morning Nick was up early and Bobby would bet money the boy hadn't slept much. He hadn't heard him having any nightmares this night, however, he'd heard it before. But it had only been a few days and Bobby had to admit, Nick recovered better than he'd expected. He didn't know if it was healthy that Nick buried himself in the books but so far he hadn't searched for answers at the bottom of a bottle, which would have been the patent Winchester recipe for any kind of problem, so it was fine, Bobby guessed.

What wasn't fine was that this method excluded Dean. Dean didn't seem to mind but Nick spent more time with Bobby and Sam than with his actual boyfriend.

Bobby got that over the last year there had only been sporadic visits and then all three of them went out together, which was great, Bobby was happy to see that Sam and Nick went along so well. It was none of his business, however, he couldn't help but notice how Nick was seeking Sam's touch whenever Dean wasn't near, how Nick was relying on Sam. Bobby was far from presuming that their connection was anything more than friendship but it wouldn't hurt if Dean and Nick got some time for themselves.

The article was exactly what Bobby had been looking for. It could be something, a haunting was his first guess, or nothing because the only witness had been completely drunk at the time he claimed he'd seen his dead mother.

So Bobby more or less forced Sam into this little trip.

"Okay, how far is this?" Sam asked when they left the salvage yard.

"Just a little over two hours, I'd say." Bobby answered and drove slowly past the Haydens' house. The boy was playing with a ball in the front yard and Bobby didn't want to risk driving him over. He didn't have much contact with his neighbors and as far as Bobby could tell the Hayden boy was mature for his age but he still was a kid and a rolling ball was a rolling ball.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw somebody in the kitchen window and for a second he wondered if there was a new woman in his neighbor's life but then they were past the house and Bobby focused on the problem at hand.

Apparently everybody was on the road today and it took them nearly three hours to get to the hospital where Mr. Boon was recovering from his drunken nosedive down the stairs in his basement.

"Mr. Boon." Sam the insurance inspector of the day interviewed the man in the hospital bed. "Can you tell us what happened?"

Mr. Boon was a young man around Sam's age so Bobby figured he would respond better to Sam. He had a broken leg, a broken nose, a dislocated shoulder and he looked like he'd gone and lost three rounds against Mike Tyson.

"Must have tripped." He mumbled around his broken nose. "Was pretty plastered."

"You said in your statement that there was someone with you." Sam prompted.

Now he looked embarrassed. "Like I said, I was drunk. Really drunk. Didn't even feel that my leg was broken at first just wondered why my arm wasn't doing what it should."

"Mr. Boon." Sam said with _that_ expression, the one that Dean had dubbed the puppy dog eyes. "What did you see?"

"I thought … I thought I saw my mother standing in the basement." He shook his head. "You know, she died two months ago and I … I took it pretty hard."

"Did she …" Sam cleared his throat. "Did she say something? Down in the basement?"

Ten minutes later Bobby and Sam left the hospital.

"I don't know, Bobby." Sam loosened his tie. "Maybe it was just the alcohol."

Bobby nodded. "Let's have a look at that basement."

They drove over to the house where Mr. Boon was now living alone.

Armed with shotguns, flashlight and EMF meter they entered the house. Everything was neat and well-loved but with a layer of dust, now missing the caring hand of the late Mother Boon.

"Basement's over there." Sam took the lead and with their shotguns drawn they made their way down the steep stairs. The meter kept quiet and there was no sign of a ghost but Bobby stayed alert nevertheless. He hasn't survived this long in this job by being careless.

They made a sweep around the basement with no result. But then something caught Bobby's eye.

"What do you see?" He shone his light at an old cardigan hanging from a nail on one of the pillars.

"You think he was that drunk?" Sam didn't sound convinced.

"Don't know." Bobby slowly retreated backwards up the stairs. He stopped in the middle. "Look at this."

Sam nearly toppled down the stairs laughing when he realized what had happened here. From the right angle the cardigan came together with a dried bouquet of flowers hanging from the rafters and a pair of rubber boots on the floor.

"He mistakes old flowers for his mother's face." Sam had to hold on to the banister and he had serious trouble breathing. Bobby grabbed him at he shoulder, Dean would kill him if Sam took the nosedive here, but Bobby himself wasn't that steady anymore. Wiping tears from his eyes he dragged Sam up the stairs and out of the house. Back in the car they finally caught their breath.

"Okay, case closed." Bobby started the car and fought against a new wave of laughter. "What about we find ourselves a motel and then have a beer?"

"Flowers." Sam still couldn't get over it. But then he sobered and nodded to the motel and beer idea and took his phone out. "Just need to call Dean real quick. Tell him that he can stop worrying."

It was close to a miracle that Dean hadn't called a few times already so letting him know that there was no case was probably a good idea. Bobby focused on driving while Sam called his brother.

By the time Sam finished the call Bobby had found a motel and parked the car. He reached for the door but one look at Sam's face hold him back.

"Something wrong?"

Sam fiddled with the phone. "He said everything is fine."

"Balls." He started the engine again.

"Ehm … what are you doing?" Sam asked when they rolled out of the parking lot.

"It's just over two hours." He reminded him.

"No, you don't have to." Sam interfered but half-hearted at best. "We can drive back in the morning."

"Sam, you think something is up with Dean. Or Nick. So there is something up back home." Bobby had learned a long time ago to listen when one of the brothers had the feeling that something was up with the other one.

On the way back they had more luck with the traffic and reached the salvage yard in little over two hours. Everything looked quiet.

Sam was out of the car before it really came to a halt and Bobby followed him a little slower and that was the reason Bobby was closer to the stairs when they heard the screaming.

"No, please." Nick, pleading and clearly in pain. Followed by a loud smack and another wailing scream. Bobby took off running.

"Bobby, no!" Sam yelled behind him and came after him but Bobby reached the guest room before Sam reached him.

Bobby wasn't sure what he'd expected, Nick having a panic attack, some kind of monster in the house, anything but what he was seeing right now.

He had a good view of Nick's naked ass, red and welted, with Nick kneeling on the floor, bent over the bed with a fully clothed Dean standing over him, holding him down with one hand and a belt raised for another blow in the other one.

"Dean, stop, please no." Nick struggled to get free but Dean held him down in an iron grip. Dean had his back to the door so he hadn't noticed Bobby yet and he didn't hesitate for a second before the belt smacked down on Nick's ass once again. Nick screamed.

"What's wrong with you?" Bobby tackled Dean to get between him and the helpless Nick on the bed while his mind was racing to find an explanation for this surreal scene. Dean was possessed, a shapeshifter, a doppelganger, something.

"Bobby?" Dean blinked at him in shock.

"Shit." Sam came up behind Bobby but instead of helping him getting the upper hand on Dean, Sam dragged Bobby away from what looked like his brother.

"Bobby, it's okay." Sam tried to get Bobby out of the room, Dean tried to get back to Nick and Nick had retreated into a corner making himself as small as possible.

As soon as Dean saw an opening he slipped past Bobby, dragged the blanket from the bed and threw it over the still butt naked Nick.

"Shh, it's okay. I'm here." Dean hushed and bodily shielded Nick from the others. "Sam, get him outa here."

Sam was already manhandling Bobby out of the room and shut the door behind them.

"Let's get downstairs." Sam said with a tired sigh but blocked the door to prevent Bobby from going back into the room.

"Sam, we have to …" Bobby started and at the same time he wondered if this was even the real Sam.

"Bobby, look. I can explain." Now it was Sam who was pleading and he sounded like Sam, worried and concerned. "Downstairs, okay? I need a drink for this."

He followed Bobby, making sure that he had no chance to make a bolt back upstairs. Bobby strained his ears but there was no screaming or the sound of the belt and that was a good sign, right?

"Boy, I hope you have a really good explanation for this." Bobby warned and reluctantly accepted the glass Sam was offering him. What was he doing here? Having a drink while upstairs … he had no idea what was happening in the guest room right now.

"This is going to be awkward." Sam mumbled before he downed his drink. "Okay, first of all. Nick is fine. And Dean isn't crazy or anything. At least not more than usual. And to be honest after you found him like this, he should be the one explaining this to you." He dropped in a chair.

"Explain what to me?" Bobby gave Dean the benefit of a doubt but he needed a good explanation. Soon.

"Dean and Nick, they have this thing going on." Sam started. "Dabbling a bit with dominant and submissive. A little spanking, a little tying up, you know, things like that."

"No, I _don't_ know, Sam." Bobby raised his voice. "All I know is that that boy was pleading for Dean to stop. You heard him screaming, you heard him pleading. And Dean didn't stop. Why Sam? Why didn't he stop when the man he claims to love is begging him to stop? That's not Dean." And whatever this was, they had left Nick alone with him. They had left him in the hands of his abuser. Bobby should get his ass back up there and get Nick out of there but he was too stunned to move.

"They have a safe-word." Sam continued and poured them a second round. "If Nick really wanted Dean to stop he would have said that word and Dean would have stopped."

"He said _stop_ , he said _no_." Bobby reminded him. "And Dean didn't stop."

Sam shook his head. "With a safe-word in place that and only that means _no_. Nick says that word and everything stops. Immediately. Without questions, without hesitation. One word and stop."

Bobby tried to wrap his mind around that. "And they like that?"

"Some people enjoy that kind of thing in bed." Sam avoided his eye and downed his second drink. "But I doubt this was about sex."

Bobby didn't live under a rock so he knew that different people had different preferences. But seeing it in his own house?

"You seem pretty okay with all this." Bobby narrowed his eyes on Sam. "And you know quite a lot about it, too."

Sam shifted uncomfortable under his gaze. "Don't ask questions you don't want to hear the answers to."


	30. Chapter 30

Nick let Dean lead him out of the bathroom back to their room where Nick got in position bent over the bed. His heart raced in anticipation and that already helped him to focus. He needed more, a lot more, but it was a start, a sign that this was what he needed.

"Shh." Dean made and stroke Nick's back gently with his fingertips. "How do you need it?"

"Hard." Nick choked the word out. "I need to feel it. Please, make it hurt, sir."

The fingertips disappeared and were replaced with the stiff bent leather of the belt. Nick trembled and let out a shaky breath. The leather traced along his spine from the base of his skull to the globes of his buttocks.

"I'm going to take care of you." Dean said in a low voice while he caressed first one then the other cheek of Nick's ass with the leather. "Sam called earlier, they are staying the night. We're all alone."

He tapped gently on the meaty part of Nick's ass.

"You can scream. Let it all out." Dean shook the belt out, keeping the buckled end in his fist.

The first blow didn't really hurt, Nick flinched more out of surprise than anything else. Dean warmed him up with even strikes, skillfully placed close together without overlapping, and Nick relaxed into the mattress under him.

Then the hits started to overlap, each blow a spark of pain, and Nick felt his body. Felt the heat and the lingering ache after each hit with the belt and warmth pooled deep in his belly.

"Take a deep breath." Dean ordered and that was all the warning Nick got before Dean spanked him in earnest. It didn't take long until Nick writhed under each blow and Dean had to hold him down to keep him in place.

Dean didn't hold back and neither did Nick. He didn't care about the tears running freely down his face or his pleading, those were distant side effects.

Nick screamed out his pain, his hurt, his fear. He let the emotions break loose inside him, like a levee broken in his soul everything washed over him.

While his mouth begged Dean to stop his body welcomed the pain. Instead of shying away, he presented himself to the belt, pushed into the blows instead of backing down.

And then everything went wrong.

"What's wrong with you?" Somebody yelled and all of a sudden the room was full with people. There was screaming and yelling and why were Sam and Bobby in the room? They shouldn't be here at all.

Nick crawled out of the way and retreated to the nearest corner and a part of him wondered where he'd left his clothes. He drew his knees to his chest and slung his arms tightly around them and just stared at the scene in front of him. He was pretty sure he'd seen that scene in a re-run of the Three Stooges before.

Bobby tried to get his hands on Dean but Sam tried to hold him back and Dean just tried to get away from Bobby. For a moment they struggled like that but then Dean slipped out from under Bobby's arm and he was back at Nick's side in an instant, throwing a blanket over him.

"Shh, it's okay. I'm here." Dean was a solid wall between Nick and the rest of the room. "Sam, get him outa here."

Sam manhandled Bobby out of the room and then there were muffled voices and then, finally, retreating footsteps down the stairs. Dean let out a deep breath and rested his forehead against Nick's.

"I'm sorry." Dean said before he leaned back a little to have a look at Nick. "Are you okay?"

The rough carpet was biting the tender skin of his ass and he shook like a leaf and he hadn't quite realized what had just happened but Nick was okay. At least he thought so.

"My ass hurts." He answered after a thoughtful moment.

Dean chuckled warmly. "I have some ointment somewhere. C'mon, let me take care of you."

Dean helped him up and led him over to the bed where Nick laid down on his belly. Dean worked the ointment gently into Nick's tender skin and soon Nick lay warm and comfy under the blanket with Dean right next to him. Only then realization of what had happened kicked in.

"Oh god." He groaned. "Bobby totally saw us, didn't he?"

"Yep." Dean answered.

"What are we going to tell him?" How could Nick look him in the eye after this? What did Bobby think of them now? Of him? Because it had been him who had been lying naked on the bed with his ass up in the air, begging for a good spanking. At least Dean had been clothed.

"Nothing, I hope." Dean gave him a forced smile. "With any luck Sam is explaining this to him at the moment."

"Why are they here, anyway?" They shouldn't be here. Dean had said they wouldn't be here before tomorrow.

"Hell if I know." Dean rolled to his back and threw an arm over his face. "When I spoke to Sam earlier he said they were on their way to find a motel for the night."

This was so embarrassing. Nick curled up on his side, back pressed against Dean.

"What is he going to do now?" Nick asked. Getting kicked out of the house suddenly looked like a really tempting idea. Maybe they should save Bobby the trouble and just sneak out. Where they would go, he had no idea, but everything was better than to face Bobby ever again. At least they were together in this.

"He's going to go red and splutter every time he sees one of us." Dean guessed but he couldn't hide his own embarrassment.

"I'd like to be a fly on the wall right now, though." Dean snickered behind him, snuggling up to Nick. "Can you imagine how Sam tries to explain this?"

Now Nick laughed freely as well. This was just so ridiculous.

"How do you feel now?" Dean asked after they'd calmed down a bit and Nick sensed that he wasn't referring to Bobby interrupting them, not only.

"Good." And that was true. The spanking, even an interrupted one, had done the trick and for the moment Nick felt content in his body, anchored, and his mind was clear. He yawned.

"It's okay, you can sleep." Dean rubbed his back and Nick relaxed farther, eyes dropping and his mind drifted slowly towards sleep. He was somewhere nice and warm between awake and asleep when he heard a soft knock at the door.

"Dean? Nick?" Sam ask in a low voice. "It's me."

"Come in." Dean answered equally quiet, probably assuming that Nick was asleep which wasn't that far off.

"You two okay?" Sam came in and Nick couldn't see him, facing the wall and having his eyes closed, but there was some movement and he guessed Sam had sat down on the edge of the bed.

"We're fine." Dean reassured him. "Nick's a little rattled and we're both waiting for the floor to open and swallow us before we have to face Bobby but we're fine."

"I bet." Sam snickered.

"How did the old man take it?" Dean shifted a bit and rolled away from Nick which he commented with a little whiny noise but went back to his almost sleep when Dean placed a hand on his shoulder. "No heart attack or anything?"

"I am the one who nearly died of a heart attack." Sam blew out a breath. "Never thought Bobby can move so quickly. He heard Nick and then he was up here before I could catch him."

"He outran you? Wow." Dean seemed impressed.

"Shut up." The hand on Nick's shoulder slipped when Sam nudged his brother but it was back in place a second later and Nick hummed happily.

"What are you doing here, anyway?" Dean asked. "You said you'd stay till tomorrow."

Sam didn't answer for a long moment.

"Sam?" Now there was concern in his tone.

"You sounded off." He finally answered in a low whisper. "Like something was wrong."

"Nick felt a little off today but we were in the middle of fixing that when we were so rudely interrupted." More shifting. "C'mere."

Nick gave in to sleep to the comforting noises of his boyfriends kissing.

When he opened his eyes again Sam was gone and Dean as sound asleep behind him. Nick tried to worm his way back to sleep but it didn't work. He was wide awake and now the thoughts started running circles in his head. Like little rodents they run around and gnawed at his conscience.

Bobby was like a father to Dean, that much had Nick figured out on his own., but would it be the same after this? After Bobby had seen this side of Dean? The side of Dean that was content with beating the living shit out of a loved one? Okay, he knew it wasn't like that but did Bobby know?

And what about his own relationship with Bobby? The man had welcomed him in his house, in his family. Nick had dragged Dean out of the closet and Bobby had not only excepted that as a part of Dean, no he'd taken Nick in, too.

_No damn faggots under my roof!_ Nick could still hear his father's words echoing through his mind. The final words of a long heated argument. He remembered the kick-out in the middle of the night with nothing but a hastily packed bag. Remembered his mother who avoided his eye and didn't speak up for him.

Would there be something like that in the morning? After Bobby had slept over it and had realized just how sick this was, would he kick Nick out? Maybe Dean as well?

What-ifs and maybes swirled though Nick's mind, keeping him awake for hours. In the morning, when he couldn't stand it anymore, he gave up and slipped out of the bed.

Deep in thoughts and with an icy fist in his stomach he padded over to the bathroom for his morning shower. On the counter he found his neatly folded clothes he'd left lying on the floor the night before. He hoped this was Sam's handiwork and not Bobby's.

He took an even longer shower than usual, toweled off and got dressed. Feeling a little bit better he left the bathroom. In the hallway he caught the scent of fresh coffee and stopped dead.

He was stuck. Bobby was down in the kitchen, probably with Nick's coffee ready, waiting for him like the other mornings. Or not. Maybe he just waited for Nick to come down to tell him to fuck off.

Nick didn't want to go downstairs, didn't want to face Bobby. But he couldn't return to the guest room either. Bobby must have heard the shower so he knew that Nick was up. Going back to Dean would mean avoiding Bobby which wasn't the worst thing Nick could think of at the moment but Bobby would know that Nick was avoiding him.

"Dammit." Torn between the two options Nick stood frozen in the hallway. In the end the safety of Dean won. Decision made Nick reached for the door knob but before he could turn it Bobby appeared at the bottom of the stairs.

"C'mon, son." He said and there was no heat, no disgust in his voice. "Your coffee ain't getting warmer."


	31. Chapter 31

Reluctantly Nick made his way down the stairs. As soon as he started moving Bobby seemed to be satisfied with the progress and retreated to the kitchen.

Everything was like it always was. Newspaper on the table with Bobby's coffee next to it, opposite to that Nick's steaming cup and Bobby stood at the stove, preparing breakfast.

Nick slipped into his seat and stared at the older man's back, not sure were to go from here.

"Here." Bobby placed two plates on the table and took his seat. "Eat up before Dean strolls in."

At that Nick breathed a little bit easier. Pretending it'd never happened worked fine with him.

"About yesterday." Bobby started and Nick was suddenly very busy with his coffee. Why couldn't he just drop it? Nick opened his mouth to tell him just that but Bobby didn't gave him a chance.

"What you and Dean do, that's none of my business." Bobby adjusted his cap and couldn't look in Nick's direction but that was fine because Nick was busy staring into his own coffee.

"And we'll never talk about this ever again." Bobby continued. "But I need to know one thing." He paused again, searching for the right words.

_Can you die from embarrassment?_ , Nick wondered and wished for Sam or Dean to appear in the door to rescue him.

"Nick, are you okay with what Dean did … does … to you … you know, with you …?" Bobby mumble a "Balls." under his breath and glanced at the door as if he wanted for something, anything, to happen to rescue him from this situation as well. Nick would have laughed at that if he hadn't been in the same position.

"Do you want it or is Dean pushing you into something?" Bobby finally managed a whole sentence.

"Didn't Sam explain it to you?" Oh god, he didn't have to tell Bobby about the kinky birds and the fetish bees, did he? It hadn't even been about sex yesterday but how do you explain that?

"He gave me the basics." Bobby let him off the hook. "To be honest, I don't really get why somebody would enjoy … something like that. But as long as it's between consenting adults it's okay, I guess." He cleared his throat. "I know what you do for a living, how you and Dean started … so, is this consensual?"

Stunned Nick just stared at him, too many thoughts running through his head.

"Why?" Was the only question he could think of. Why would Bobby even care? Why would he stand up for him if Dean was abusing him? Nobody ever had stood up for Nick.

"Why do you care?" Nick clarified at Bobby's puzzled look.

"Because you matter, ya idjit."

Now Nick had to fight against his emotions again.

"Thanks, Bobby." He said softly around the lump in his throat. "But I am fine. In fact, it was me who wanted it yesterday. I had to convince Dean to do it."

Bobby looked him in the eye for a long moment before he nodded.

"Alright, but if you ever need help …" He ended the sentence with an inviting gesture. Overwhelmed Nick couldn't speak.

After the most awkward conversation in his life Nick excused himself and retreated to his room with a book. By then Dean was out of bed and in the bathroom and Nick had the room for himself and they left him alone till after noon. And for once Nick wanted to be alone.

When somebody was at his door he expected Dean but it was Sam who came in with a plate of sandwiches. Sam sat down at the edge of the bed and Nick stole a kiss. Lately he got plenty of Dean but way too little of Sam. So he absolutely didn't mind when Sam kissed him back and even hesitantly used his tongue a bit. Sam was all man, firm body and a little bit of stubble because he hadn't bothered to shave this morning and he smelled manly, so it wasn't that hard to shove the memories of _her_ away.

They kissed, desperately, hungrily, with Nick's fingers entangled in Sam's hair and Sam's hand roaming his back and it felt good. It felt really good and on some level Nick breathed in relief that it still felt good, that he was still able to enjoy a passionate kiss. His pants felt a little bit too tight now too but he wasn't ready for that and so they parted after a minute with swollen lips and blushed cheeks and barley hidden lust in their eyes. Sam didn't push it and offered him a sandwich instead.

"How's it going with Dean and Bobby?" Nick took a bite of his sandwich.

"Awkward." Sam grinned. "Dean's hiding in the shop for hours now."

"You're enjoying this way too much."

Sam didn't deny that.

"How do you feel about getting out of the house for a few hours?" Sam asked.

Nick swallowed but his chest tightened and he had to fight the bite down.

"Nothing fancy." Sam hurried to say. "Just a trip to the bookstore. You'll love it, Adela has some interesting books on the occult. And Dean hasn't seen her in a while. What do you think? Just the three of us?"

Nick wasn't keen on meeting new people but one person in one shop? He guessed he could handle that and a bookstore was tempting. And it would be a good thing to get out of Bobby's way for a while.

As soon as he spotted the old bookstore with its old wooden sign telling him that this was the _Inquiring Minds_ Nick decided that he loved this store.

"Hunting for a good read? We have everything you need?" He read the slogan in the window with a frown. Something was off with that.

"Adela acquires rare books for hunters." Sam explained. "And she has a back room business running with ingredients."

"The real stuff." Dean explained and opened the door to the store. A bell above announced the customers. "Not the crap they sell you at those new age shops."

The store was dim, stuffed with shelves and smelled of leather, old paper and dust. And it appeared to be empty.

"Just a minute." Came a female voice from the back.

"Take your time, old lady." Dean yelled back with a childish grin and got slapped at the shoulder by his brother for that.

"Dean Winchester?" Now a head poked around one of the shelves in the back. There was a swirl of curly hair and then Dean had his arms full of woman hugging him tightly. She kissed his cheek and then stepped back to take in the sight. "My, my. Getting more handsome with every day."

She cupped his cheek and then turned to Sam to give him a hug as well. Nick observed the scene with a little distance, not quite hiding behind the tall brothers but not in plain sight either.

"Hope I didn't give you too much trouble with my chatty mouth the other day." She apologized for something but Sam waved it off.

"Bobby has other things on his mind right now than me looking at men, too."

"Wait … what?" Dean looked from his brother to the woman and back.

"When I heard that one of you's going steady with another man I guessed it was Sam." She explained with only a hint of abashment. "Never pegged you for being the relationship type, Dean Winchester."

She poked his chest but then her gaze shifted from him to Nick standing in the second row.

"You must be the mysterious Nick." She stepped closer and for a second he feared that she would hug him as well. But she stopped at arm's length and just looked him up and down.

"Never thought Dean has actual taste. Adela Blake." She held her hand out without paying attention to Dean's protest.

"Nick Perkins." Her hand lay warm and delicate in his but she had a firm grip.

"Nice to meet you." She said with a smile that reached her eyes. "The boys don't give you too much trouble, don't they?"

"No, ma'am."

"Adela, please." She insisted but turned her attention from him to Sam for which Nick was thankful. He liked her but she was a stranger and he didn't do strangers well a the moment.

"So, are you just here for a little chit-chat or is there something I can help you with?" She asked.

"Actually, Nick here is quite interested in succubi." Sam answered and Nick threw him a glare. He didn't have to tell her that. Now she would ask and then … oh, god.

"Succubi, hm?" She tapped her lips with her finger, thinking. "Something about succubi which that sly dog Singer doesn't already have, let me see." She disappeared between the shelves.

"Why did you have to ask about that?" Nick whispered with a hint of anger in his voice and at the same time Dean hissed: "How did she know about you?"

However, before Sam had the chance to answer any of the questions Adela was back, an old leather-bound book in hand.

"This could be interesting." She gave the book to Nick who read the title.

_Mystical Creatures Associated With Fertility And Sexuality_. It sounded like a dry disquisition on the topic but Nick hadn't seen this book in Bobby's library and a quick skim through the pages told him that it didn't look worse than some of the books he'd read over the last few days. But it looked expensive.

"We take it." Sam said before Nick could say otherwise.

Adela went to help another customer and Sam and Dean started to stroll around the store.

"If you find something you like, just take it." Dean encouraged Nick and in the end they had the Mystical Creatures and a novel for Nick, three books for Sam and even Dean had found a book about guns in the Wild West.

Adela had finished helping the other customer who was now browsing the section she'd shown him and was ringing up their items now.

"Strange guy." She muttered when the customer, a young man in some kind of clerk's uniform, was out of earshot but then her attention was on the three men in front of her again and for a few minutes they chatted easily. Nick mostly listened in, they talked about people and events he didn't know about, but it was quite interesting to hear about his boyfriends' lives. But of course Adela wasn't only interested in old stories about the Winchesters.

"So, Dean." She said but her eyes were on Nick and he knew what she was about to ask. "Where did you find this fine young man?"

"Kinda picked him up on the street." Dean answered without missing a beat. "He was looking for a ride and he stuck around."

That wasn't a complete lie and Adela didn't ask about details.

"You're staying at Singer's for a while or so I've heard." She changed the topic and packed their books in a bag.

The Winchesters nodded in unison.

"A little time to recover." Sam explained but didn't elaborate that.

"I would be badly disappointed if you wouldn't come by once or twice before you leave again."

"Yes, ma'am." The brothers spoke as one with wide grins on their faces.

"And you." Adela pointed with her finger at Nick who shied back at her sudden attention but she pretended to not notice. "Same for you, young man. Don't be a stranger."

They said their goodbyes and Sam and Dean got hearty hugs and little kisses but when it came to Nick, Adela hold back and only squeezed his shoulder for a second before she gave him some distance. Nick didn't know how much she knew or what she guessed about him but he wasn't stupid enough to think for one minute that she didn't know that the recovering time was for him. She didn't pry, though, and he gave her credit for that.

Back in the car Sam turned in his seat.

"What do you think of her?" He asked.

"I think I like her."


	32. Chapter 32

Little Jerry became a nuisance. He didn't confront Ishtar or anything but he kept an eye on her. As long as he was in the house Ishtar was watched. He tried to be sneaky about it but he was a nine-year-old kid and she had been around when mankind had huddled around a fire in some damp cave, afraid of the things in the darkness outside their little spot of light. So yeah, she was aware of him watching her out of the corner of his eye, of him standing around the corner when she got a phone call and she was pretty sure she'd heard him right outside the bedroom door while she had some fun with his dad. The last one had been followed by rapid footsteps and a slammed door and it'd never happened again.

Ishtar noticed all that but she couldn't care less. As long as he stayed out of her way and didn't cause any trouble he could stare and glare at her as much as he wanted. He'd probably grow tired of it pretty soon anyway.

Tim was still at work and Jerry should be doing his homework but was sitting at the top of the stairs and tried to catch a glimpse of what she was doing down here.

She had seen the Winchesters and little Nicky passing by a few minutes earlier and it had been tempting to follow them but they were hunters and even a familiar car became suspicious if they saw it too often so she stayed home and was now waiting for one of her little pets to call and tell her what they were up to.

When her phone finally rang the caller ID said CSG, the Copy Shop Guy.

"What do you got?" She asked without a greeting.

"They are here." CSG reported eagerly. "They're next door in the bookstore. All three of them."

Ishtar chewed on her bottom lip for a second, pondering her options but this was a chance too good to let pass.

"Get over there." She instructed. "By a book or something but I want to know everything you can find out about the Winchesters and their little fuck toy. And about this Adela Blake. You hear me?"

"Yes."

Singer was home alone and she thought about just going over and making a move on him, she was the woman of Tim's dreams now and Singer wouldn't recognize her face, but it was too risky. The venom took a moment to take effect and that was more than enough time to ram a silver knife into her heart. She doubted Singer would take any chances with women kissing him randomly.

So she paced the living room and waited for CSG to call her back what he finally did.

Apparently the Winchesters knew Ms. Blake since childhood but they hadn't told her about their not so brotherly feelings for each other. Ms. Blake was under the impression that Nicky-boy was Dean's boyfriend and only his. Thinking about that it shouldn't be such a big surprise but it was still hilarious. Were they playing that charade with Singer, too?

What bothered Ishtar was the bookstore and this Ms. Blake. She really wished she could get some insights on that but sadly Ms. Blake wasn't a Mr. Blake. Somebody close to them, somebody they trusted, that would open her some nice options.

"I got myself a gay man." She thought aloud, ignoring the fact that she hadn't been able to fully control said gay man. "Why not a straight woman?"

Checking the time she made a plan. It was worth a try and if it didn't work it wouldn't make much of a difference. Just a woman hitting on another woman so even with the heads-up about succubi that wouldn't be the first thing coming to mind.

She sent out a text message to all her little pets to reschedule their meeting so she could be there when Ms. Blake left the bookstore at ten like every evening.

"Honey, I'm home." Tim announced his arrival loudly and Ishtar just rolled her eyes at that cheesy greeting. She was so looking forward to killing him. And his little brat too.

Then she had her arms full of Tim and he was seeking her mouth like he was a starving man and she gave him what he needed. He was way past caring if his son was around or not, there was just need and Ishtar generously dosed him up with her venom.

"Why don't you make us something to eat?" She pried him off her with some effort. "Something quick, I have to go out later on."

He pouted but did as he was told.

"Hey." Behind her back Jerry had his dirty little paws on her phone she'd left on the table. "What do you think you're doing? Tim, do something."

But Tim didn't do more than to give Jerry a glare and to tell him to leave her phone alone.

_He hasn't even his own son under control,_ Ishtar thought with a snort.

After dinner Jerry immediately retreated to his room and Ishtar took the chance to ride Tim on the couch before it was time to leave. She couldn't feed too often off him if she wanted him to be able to function over the day but a girl had to eat.

It didn't take much to make him come and she sucked in his come along with a bit of his energy and he had at least the decency to get her off as well before he collapsed.

She left him spent on the couch with his pants undone and his wet cock hanging out. She smiled at the thought that Jerry could come downstairs any time and find his father like this.

Meeting point with her pets was a back ally behind a bar where nobody would think twice about a couple kissing behind a dumpster, even if it was a little bit early for that. And the men could come in at one end of the ally and exit through the other so there wasn't that much of a coming and going for somebody to notice. They came to her one by one, greeting her with wide smiles and murmured declarations of their eternal love, and she kissed and fondled each and every one of them and whispered soft words in their ears.

She never had so many men under her control at once before but basically their number was only limited by the amount of venom she could produce and if she could refresh her mark in time before the venom wore off.

By the time the last of them was gone Ishtar felt exhausted and she leaned at the brick wall for a moment to catch her breath. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed some movement at the mouth of the ally but before she even made it over there whoever had been there had taken off. She only caught a glimpse of some kid on a bike and her first thought was Jerry, but in the dark she couldn't tell. Could be Jerry, could be just a random kid on a bike. Ishtar shrugged and headed the other way. Even if it had been Jerry, what could he do? Tell his father? Good luck with that.

Ishtar checked the time, nearly ten, and hurried to get to the diner. According to CSG Ms. Blake left her bookstore at ten and then had a late dinner at the diner at the corner. Ishtar couldn't get near the store but for sure she could get close to the owner.

Ms. Blake wasn't there to zoom in on her but Ishtar doubted that she had a woman of her dreams anyway. So she just let her current face age until she looked about the same age as Ms. Blake and darkened her skin a little bit. Without knowing her preferences Ishtar guessed going for average was the best bet. Not too pretty or too ugly, skin not too light or too dark, hair not too long or too short, Ishtar was average. Indifferent.

Being indifferent she entered the diner and took a place where she had the door in her line of view without obviously staring at it.

She ordered something to have a legitimate reason to stay and waited for Ms. Blake. When it was ten past ten she honestly wondered if CSG knew what he was talking about. But then the door opened and she came in. The staff greeted her like an old friend and Ms. Blake headed straight for the table Ishtar guessed was hers. The waitress didn't even bring the menu and just ask "Same as usual?" and they chatted lightly for a moment before the waitress returned to the kitchen.

Ishtar waited until Ms. Blake had almost finished her meal before she made her move. With visible hesitation she stepped closer.

"Excuse me?" She tucked her hair back behind her ear, playing nervous. "I normally don't do this but you look so familiar. Do I know you?"

Ms. Blake looked up at her with alert in her eyes and studied her face.

"Sorry, I don't remember you." She finally said with a polite smile. "But I own the bookstore just down the street, maybe you've seen me there?"

"No, I'm new in town and I haven't been in any bookstores lately." She shook her head and sent a wave of pheromones in her direction. "I'm so sorry, I bothered you with this. Can I buy you at least a coffee for the inconvenience?"

The alert in her eyes wasn't completely gone but it was dimmed and Ms. Blake now had a little dreamy smile on her lips. At least the pheromones did their job and Ishtar zoomed in on her. Indifferent became specific but there wasn't much to work with. Ms. Blake had no sexual interest in women.

"Hell if I say no to a free coffee." She made an inviting gesture and Ishtar took the seat across from her.

"So, you own a bookstore." Ishtar started some small talk and by the time the coffees arrived they were on first name basis, Ishtar's happened to be Anna for the evening, and an hour later Adela ranted about rude customers. She never let on that some of her customers were more than ordinary customers but she had a funny way to tell her stories and Ishtar had to admit that she enjoyed her company.

"If I want to get any sleep tonight I should get going." Adela said and stood up. "Thanks for the coffee."

This was her chance. Ishtar stood up as well and quickly brought their lips together. Then they both just stood there and stared at each other for a long moment.

"Was that too fast?" Ishtar went back to her being a little shy role while she waited for the venom to take effect.

"A little bit." Adela straightened but didn't look at her in disgust. "I'm sorry if you got the wrong signals here but I'm not interested."

"Oh, I'm so sorry." By now she should be under her control but Adela showed no sign that the venom did its job. "I didn't mean to … I should go now."

She hurried past Adela but she reached for her arm and hold her back. A triumphant smile crept on Ishtar's lips.

_Gotcha._

"A piece of advice." Adela said and she didn't sound like the eager little puppy she should be by now. "Don't just kiss random people."

"I'm sorry." Ishtar repeated and hurried out of the diner. Dammit, it hadn't worked. She had never actually tried to seduce a woman before and she guessed it had something to do with chemistry that her venom didn't work on Adela. It was designed for men after all. Frustrated Ishtar made her way back to the car.

"Don't just kiss people." She mocked. "What do you know, you wizened old spinster."


	33. Chapter 33

After their visit at the bookstore Nick expected them to drive straight back to Bobby's and if he was honest Nick wasn't up to meeting more people right now so that was fine with him.

But Dean took a right turn at some point and then they were in the middle of nowhere. Just fields and a few low bushes shielding them from the empty road.

"Where are we?" Nick asked because even at second sight he had no idea what they were doing here. There was nothing, no people, no buildings, no signs of civilization. Just them.

"Nowhere." Was Dean's not helpful answer but then the brothers were out of the car and Nick hurried to follow them. A minute later he had a beer in hand and sat between Sam and Dean on the warm hood of the car. It was getting late and the sky slowly turned into different shades of orange and red and purple. Nick could tell because he had a great view on the sunset, the hood he was sitting on was aligned west, purely by accident he bet.

Sam and Dean sat close, touching him from knee to shoulder, and Nick melted into the touch. They were here with him, they did this for him.

"Thank you." He whispered, eyes fixed on the horizon.

Sam and Dean pretended to not hear that but they reached around his back and grabbed his shoulders, drawing him even closer. They finished their beers and then just sat there and watched the sky turning black.

Nick turned his head, the rest of him was more or less stuck between them, to face Dean.

"Kiss me."

Dean studied his face for a moment and then leaned in and their lips met. Like with Sam earlier this day it started almost chaste but then Nick parted his lips and invited Dean in and Dean explored his mouth like this was the first time, like he needed to map out the area.

They parted and rested their foreheads together before Nick turned to Sam who didn't hesitate this time. He claimed Nick's mouth, tongue brushing against tongue, and Nick moaned into the kiss. The hands left his shoulders and were now stroking and rubbing his back while Sam invaded his mouth.

Then a second mouth was on his neck, unsure, probing, but Nick just angled his head a little bit without losing contact with Sam to give Dean better access and that was all Dean needed. Kissing and licking he caressed every inch of Nick's skin he could reach. Heat spread through Nick, pooling deep in his belly, and he shifted to give his growing erection some room. He wasn't sure how far this would go, how far he wanted this to go, but for now he was content with the kissing and the roaming hands.

A hand landed on Nick's knee, Dean's his foggy mind supplied, and Nick blindly grabbed the wrist and placed the hand farther up where he needed it.

"You sure?" Dean murmured in his ear and didn't move his hand but didn't drew it back either.

Nick broke contact with Sam, who just switched to tracing the outline of Nick's jaw with his lips, and looked Dean in the eye.

"You can touch me. I don't know if …" He didn't want to kill the mood but there were things he definitively wasn't ready for. "But you can touch me." He emphasized that part and saw understanding in Dean's eyes.

"Nothing you don't want." Dean promised and gently cupped him through the jeans. Nick pushed into his hand and then Sam found his mouth again and slipped his hand under Nick's shirt.

"It's okay." Nick moaned in the kiss and Sam spread his fingers, caressing his stomach and ribs, brushing over a nipple. Nick arched into the touch, into their hands and mouths on him.

There was the moment when Dean opened Nick's pants to take out his cock when Nick froze. Immediately Dean let go of him and everything stopped. Sam and Dean gave him some space and patiently waited for him to tell them what to do, continue or stop or continue but not with that, and Nick knew they would do whatever he would tell them. And that made the difference. He was in control. It was his decision.

"Go ahead." He caught Dean's bottom lip between his teeth and gave it a little tug "Don't leave a guy hanging like this." He kissed him again, tracing Dean's full lips with the tip of his tongue.

They worshiped his body. While Nick's attention was on Dean, Sam nibbled at his neck and kissed the soft spot behind Nick's ear. Sam shifted a bit so he could get both hands under Nick's shirt and every brush with his fingers over Nick's skin was a silent "I love you".

Dean just covered Nick's member with his palm for a moment, a heavy weight on his now fully erected cock. Then, ever so slowly, Dean let the shaft slip through his cupped hand, a firm but gentle grip, until he had the head covered with his palm where he hold it for another moment.

Nick moaned deep in his throat and Dean drank the sound right out of his mouth. The hand slid down his cock the same way, slow and firm, down to the base where the fingers formed a ring, just long enough for Nick to feel the tightness before Dean went farther down and took Nick's balls in his hand, gently rolling them, with a light tug or squeeze now and then but far from being uncomfortable. This wasn't about pain-play, not today. It wasn't about coming either. This was about reconnecting, this was about love and care.

Nick willingly surrendered to their touches, their hands and mouths on him, and let himself fall into their arms. Sam and Dean held him, cherished him. The world zoomed in on them until there was nothing but the three men on the hood of the car on an empty field in the falling night.

Nick let go, let the pleasure consume him and he knew that Sam and Dean were there to hold him.

His orgasm washed over him. Incoherent words fell from his lips and his body went rigid but strong arms caught him, gentle hands worked him through the shocks of pleasure.

When he came to Nick lay stretched out on the hood of the Impala, the clear sky with millions of stars above him, and his lovers at his sides, stroking his chest and murmuring soft words to calm him down.

"You good?" Dean asked when Nick blinked him into focus.

"Yeah." He barely had a voice. "That was … wow." His body felt pleasantly heavy and worn out and he could lay like this forever.

"What about you?" Nick asked, remembering that he hadn't touched them at all.

"We're good." Sam answered but the hard line of his cock pressed against Nick's thigh. He felt it clearly even through two layers of jeans.

"Get up." Nick urged Sam to get off the hood and reluctantly Sam obeyed. "C'mere."

Nick sat up and spread his legs, Sam fit perfectly between his thighs.

"Nick, you don't have to." Sam hurried to say when Nick reached for his fly but Nick had nothing of that. He freed Sam's cock and shoved his underwear and jeans down to his knees. For a second he just admired the view but then he closed his hand around Sam and gave him an experimental stroke.

"I want to." Nick brought their lips together and with his other hand on Sam's neck he dragged him down until the lay on the hood again with Sam on top of Nick.

Nick worked Sam's cock in long, even strokes and slapped his bare ass with the his left.

"Getting the idea, Dean?" Nick turned his head to Dean who was still stretched out next to him and watched the scene with amusement.

"Hmm, let me see." Dean pushed himself up to a sitting position but didn't get off the hood. "Sam bent over with his naked ass up in the air. I've no clue."

He gave Sam's ass a little slap himself and Sam yelped and bucked into Nick's fist.

"You better get you dick in there." Sam gritted his teeth when Nick twisted his wrist just right on the upstroke. "Don't gonna last."

"Is that so?" Finally Dean got up.

Between the two of them, they got Sam riled up quickly. Panting and cursing in Nick's ear Sam humped his fist and at the same time tried to push into Dean's fingers working him open. Nick only grinned and painted little circles with the pad of his thumb just under the head of Sam's cock.

"Don't let him come." Dean warned and reached for his own zipper.

"Won't do." Nick silenced the frustrated growl from Sam with a deep kiss and squeezed the base of his erection to keep him from coming too soon.

"Fuck, Dean." Sam rested his forehead on Nick's chest when Dean entered him.

"Looks more like fuck Sammy to me." Dean answered with a smirk but gave Sam a moment to adjust to the sudden stretch.

Dean and Nick found a rhythm, reducing Sam to an incoherent mess between them, and it didn't take long until Sam came all over Nick's hand. Nick jacked him through his orgasm, ropes of come spurting between their stomachs and for an absurd second Nick wondered if Bobby would notice their messed up shirts.

Spent Sam collapsed on top of Nick, head resting in the hollow of Nick's neck, while Dean increased his pace and pounded into Sam. A few more frantic thrusts and Dean threw his head back, his brother's name on his lips, and came buried to the hilt in Sam.

Dean had the sense to not collapse on top of them, Sam alone was more than heavy enough for Nick, thank you very much, and plopped butt naked on the hood instead.

"Dude, you're heavy." Nick tapped Sam's shoulder until the other man rolled off of him.

Catching their breath nobody spoke and Nick had no intention to ever move again but with the sun gone the night had become chilly and his sensitive parts were still hanging out of his pants.

"We should go back." Dean broke the silence but showed no intention to get up.

"Yeah." Sam made and didn't move either.

Nick looked up at the stars. He'd never seen them so bright but he'd never been in the middle of nowhere at night before. The city kid he was knew nothing but street lamps. Sam and Dean were on the road almost constantly so this was nothing unusual for them, he guessed, but for Nick it was something special. There were so many. And here he was, small and unimportant. That feeling was overwhelming, filling his eyes with tears, but then Dean's hand was on his knee again and Sam drew him closer to his chest in a tight embrace.

"We are here." Sam whispered in his ear. "We got you."

Nick breathed in the comforting scent of Sam and blindly reached for Dean who didn't hesitate to hold his hand.

The crisp night air finally forced them to at least tuck themselves back in and Sam and Nick cleaned their shirts as best as they could with a bottle of water and an old rag but in the end they could only hope that Bobby wouldn't notice the stains or at least wouldn't realize what they were. That would be awkward to explain.


	34. Chapter 34

They had been at Bobby's for two weeks now and Sam and Dean, Dean more than Sam, though, started to become restless. They would never push it and they would stay here with Nick as long as he wanted it, as he needed it, and Bobby was more than happy to have them around, Nick never doubted that but this was no permanent solution. So Nick started thinking about his future.

He saw three options. He could go back to what he'd done before, he could find a real job or he could become a hunter and go with Sam and Dean.

Sioux Falls for sure had a corner with men working the streets and he'd never been ashamed of what he did to earn his money so that wasn't the problem but so far he had only been comfortable with that one night out in the field with Sam and Dean. Since then there had been only small touches and little kisses. With Bobby around Sam was mostly out of his reach but even with Dean he hadn't done anything more than kissing and touching above the waist, no even jerking each other off in the middle of the night or anything like that. Nick highly doubted he could do that and more with a complete stranger. Not now, maybe never again. So that option was out.

Getting a real job was tempting but without any qualification or experience aside from his outstanding cock sucking skills it would be difficult at least to find a job. And there was still the issue that he was a wanted man. Sam had checked on the case of Aiden's murder regularly and the warrant was still out. Using his real name could be risky, nowadays people googled everything and one search for his name could get him in real trouble. Nick kept the real job option in mind but had no idea how or if he could realize it.

Which left the hunter option. Nick loved the research, he hadn't done much else over the last week. He absorbed every bit of information and when a hunter called Bobby with a question it was like a puzzle to solve and Nick dove in, forgetting everything else until he had solved that puzzle.

Becoming a hunter would also mean that he could be with Sam and Dean permanently and that was a big pro for this option. What he didn't know was if he could handle the actual hunt. He had survived his encounter with the succubus, he had stabbed her with a piece of glass until he thought she was dead.

But that had been in self-defense. Going after a creature with the clear intent to kill it? That was something completely different. And even if he just stayed with the research and let the brothers handle the killing, he would be stuck in a motel room while they were out there and he could only hope that they would come back to him in one piece, or at least not dead.

Nick made the decision to at least try the hunter option.

"Dean?" Nick approached his boyfriend who had been working on a car all morning. Fed up with Dean lingering around Bobby had sent him out to make himself useful and the way Dean hummed while he was working, he was happy with this task. Even if it was just a junker he had to strip for salvageable parts.

Bent over the engine and with his t-shirt all greasy and sweaty Dean looked gorgeous and Nick openly admired the view for a moment.

"Yeah?" Dean came up and wiped sweat from his forehead which worked against the sweat but left more grease on his face. He'd need a shower later. A thorough one. Nick banned the thought of a naked, soapy Dean under the shower from his mind, this was important.

"I was thinking." Nick started, unsure how to ask. They had never spoken about this before and he wasn't sure how Dean would react to the idea.

"About what?" Dean prompted when Nick didn't continue. He leaned against the car and waited patiently for Nick to speak.

"Could you teach me how to shoot?"

"Sure." Dean eyed him, trying to read him. "May I ask why?"

Nick took the spot next to him so they were shoulder to shoulder and not staring at each other. For some reason he could talk more openly this way.

"Bobby is nice and all." He dragged the tip of his sneaker over the ground. "But it can't stay like this forever."

"It can stay like this as long as you want." Dean reminded him. "Bobby loves you."

"I know and I'm not talking about leaving tomorrow." Nick let out a sigh. "I'd like to come with you. With you and Sam. Hunting."

Dean didn't say anything for a long moment. "Are you sure?"

"No." Nick answered honestly. He wasn't sure. Hell, the closest he'd ever come to a gun had been when that mugger had pointed one at him. And he hadn't taken that well at all. "That's why I want you to teach me how to shoot."

"Guess it can't hurt if you know your way around a gun." Dean pushed himself off the car and cleaned his hands with a rag. "But it's a dangerous job and I would rather know you somewhere safe."

"You and Sam are hunters." Nick countered. Was Dean worried about his safety or didn't he want Nick around all the time? The old fear that he was only the additional fuck toy they could use whenever they felt like it sparked up again even if he knew it wasn't true. They loved him, he knew that.

"No one in their right mind chooses this life " Dean threw the rag aside and nodded for Nick to follow him to the Impala. "Sam and me? We were raised into this. You have options, you can do whatever you want with your life."

"What options?" Nick fell in step next to him. "You think I work as a hooker because it's the most appealing option?" It came out more bitter than he'd intended. He had been content with his life. It hadn't been his dream life but without that he would have never met Sam and Dean, for example.

Dean threw him a glance but didn't say anything and opened the hidden compartment in the Impala's trunk.

Nick had seen the arsenal before, Dean had used the last days for maintenance and had gone through the whole arsenal, had cleaned the guns, sharpened the knifes and restocked what needed restocking, but now Nick saw it with new eyes. Now it wasn't just academic interest, now he was about to actually use one of the weapons.

Dean took out a pistol with ivory grips and a clip with bullets. Nick's mouth went dry and he was close to calling this off. Seeing the gun alone gave him the creeps.

"Let's go to the back." Dean took the lead. They went around the house and then through the labyrinth of car wrecks to the far end of Bobby's property.

"Is this okay?" Nick looked around, the nearest house was pretty far away but still. "Won't somebody hear?"

"Don't worry." Dean reassured him. "Sam and I have emptied a few clips back here, I can tell you, nobody cares."

"Okay." Nick tried to hide his nervousness. "What are we going to shoot at?"

Dean pointed with his finger at a nearby car wrack. "Driver's door over there."

He looked at the gun in his hand and for a moment Nick was sure that Dean would call this off and Nick wouldn't mind at all. He didn't feel comfortable with this but he wanted to go through with it. Nick needed to know if he could do this. He wouldn't be of much use as a hunter if he couldn't handle a gun.

"Okay, safety rules first." Dean said and his whole manner changed. From one second to the other he changed from the man unsure if he should do this to a teacher who knew what he was talking about and who knew exactly how to teach the subject. As if he'd done this before.

"Unless you want to shoot something, you point at something safe." Dean established the first rule. "So even if the gun gets off you won't hurt anybody. And try to not shoot your own foot."

"Point at something safe." Nick repeated but that rule was pretty clear. Common sense told him that it wasn't a good idea to wave a gun around.

"Second, keep your fingers off the trigger." He pointed at that part of the gun. "You don't touch it until you really want to shoot."

Even without Dean pointing it out Nick would have kept his fingers as far away as possible from the trigger.

"This is the safety." Dean showed him how to flick it on and off. "Make sure the safety is on and the gun is unloaded. You inside the clip only when you are ready to shoot something. And you always handle a gun as if it is loaded. Always."

Dean looked him in the eye and Nick nodded his understanding.

"Okay, let's try this." Dean gave him the gun and under his watchful eye Nick loaded it but kept the safety on. "Good, come here."

Dean stood behind him, his chest pressed at Nick's back and his steady hands covering Nick's slightly trembling ones around the gun.

"This is going to be loud." Dean said and adjusted his stand. "And be ready for the recoil. Okay, nice and slow now."

The shot was loud and the recoil slammed up his arms to his shoulders and Nick tumbled backwards into the solid wall of Dean. With a scream he dropped the gun.

"Shit." Dean dragged him backwards and twisted them around so that he was between Nick and the gun on the ground. When nothing happened Dean let out a breath right next to Nick's ear.

"I forgot to mention that you never just drop a gun." Dean finally said and picked up the pistol. He unloaded it and flicked the safety on with practiced movements and without really looking at what his hands were doing, his worried eyes were on Nick. In the end he did look down to check the chamber, though.

"Sorry." Nick said meekly.

"Just don't do that again." Dean shook his head in amusement. "You wanna try again?"

"I don't think I like guns very much." Nick admitted. This had been a stupid idea. He had never liked guns and he liked them even less now. The last thing he wanted to do was to hold that thing in his hands again.

"Nick." Dean stepped closer and slung his gun free arm around his shoulder. "Don't try to force yourself into something you are not. You don't have to become a hunter, you don't have to learn how to shoot."

Nick hung his head. He wanted to be more than just a burden. He needed to be more. But this little lesson in shooting had just confirmed what he'd already known but had refused to accept. He wasn't a hunter. He didn't need to become one, he got that, but that didn't help him with his general problem. He could still be a researcher, he guessed. However, Sam and Bobby had years on him and knew things off the top of their heads which he still had to learn the hard way.

"Don't push yourself too hard." Dean squeezed his shoulder and when they returned to the car he stored the gun in the arsenal without a comment.

"As for the coming with us part." He closed the trunk and patted the roof of the car. "She has always a seat with your name on it waiting for you."


	35. Chapter 35

Through the kitchen window Bobby watched Nick and Dean at the Impala. Even after two weeks it was a strange sight to see. Bobby didn't care if Dean was with a man or a woman and if Bobby was honest, Nick had grown on him, so it wasn't that what baffled him.

What still baffled him was the fact that Dean was with somebody. He knew this went for over a year now but actually seeing them together? With Dean clearly in love with this young man? That was something Bobby had never thought he would see. Sam, yes, Sam craved normality, the apple pie life how Dean had once phrased it. But Dean? So far Dean had been content with occasional one-night stands, just a little fun, not strings attached. That was exactly how this whole thing had started, Bobby remembered. Just a little fun for one night. And now they were together for a year.

Bobby shook his head and followed them with his eyes until they disappeared around the corner. Dean had taken his Colt so Bobby was pretty sure where they were going but he was surprised by Dean's choice of weapon. It was his favorite gun, sure, but Sam's Taurus would be easier to handle for a beginner.

Bobby continued with the dishes, for some reason everybody else in the house thought they got cleaned by magic, and it didn't take long and he heard a distant shot. One shot and only silence after that. Which was strange. Dishes forgotten Bobby strained his ears. Dean knew how to handle a gun and for sure he wouldn't hand one over to Nick without making sure that Nick knew enough to not shoot himself or anybody else.

When they came back in view Bobby breathed easier. Dean put the gun back in the trunk and said something to Nick who looked anything but happy.

_That lesson didn't go well,_ Bobby figured but he hadn't pegged Nick for somebody who felt comfortable with a gun in the first place.

Bobby finished the dishes and then went over to the study where he found Sam reading. By now he'd expected to find Nick here as well but the boy was nowhere in sight. Thinking about it Bobby couldn't even recall if he'd heard the front door or not.

Sensing him Sam looked up from his book with a questioning look.

"I have to run some errands." He announced. "You need something?"

"I'm good." Sam turned back to his book. "Thanks, Bobby."

"Keep an eye on the phones while I'm gone, would ya?" Bobby grabbed his jacket and the keys.

"Sure." Sam mumbled absently and Bobby could only hope that he would actually hear the phones engrossed as he was.

Outside he found Dean back to stripping down the junker and Nick sitting not too far away on the hood of another junker, scratching doodles in the ground with a broken off antenna.

"Hey, Nick." Bobby stepped closer but kept a distance he'd leaned Nick could handle. Nick was fine with Dean and for some reason Sam being close, even touching him without a warning, but everybody else coming too close Nick went stiff like a board.

Nick looked up and smiled at him.

"I have some things to do in town." Bobby said and leaned next to him at the car. From here he had an excellent view on Dean's ass and a stripe of skin where his t-shirt had ridden up a little bit. Dean's sweaty t-shirt clung tightly to the rest of his body, Bobby couldn't help but notice and hurried to look away. He had seen Dean like this a million times but this was the first time he realized what it must look like to Nick.

"Dean seems busy right now." Bobby observed. "You feel like coming with me? I could use an extra pair of hands. Or do you want to admire the view a little more?"

Caught Nick actually blushed and Dean's head poked up from under the hood with a "Hey!" and a grin that could only be described as lecherous in Nick's direction. It didn't help that he wiggled his backside, too.

With a frustrated growl Bobby pushed himself off the old car and headed towards his one. He didn't let his amused smile show until he was facing the other way.

"Wait." Nick hurried to catch up with him. "I'm coming with you."

Bobby nodded and tried to hide his surprise. So far Nick hadn't left Dean's side for long and if he did, he mostly traded Dean in for Sam. This was a huge step for Nick. Bobby made eye-contact with Dean who looked similar surprised but gave him a shrug.

Their first stop was at _Inquiring Minds_ mainly because Bobby thought they should start with a place and a person Nick already knew.

Adela was busy with a customer and only acknowledged them with a nod when they entered the bookstore, but her eyes lit up when she noticed Nick.

Bobby and Nick browsed the shelves and by the time Adela had time for them, Nick was flipping through one book with three others piled next to him and Bobby honestly considered leaving him in the store while he ran his errands. Just like a little Sammy so many years ago Nick seemed content here.

"Bobby Singer." Adela greeted him with a hug. "And Nick Perkins what a pleasant counterpart to that old mug over there." She pointed with the thumb over her shoulder at Bobby and reached out with her other hand for Nick.

Bobby bit back the comment on his tongue and marveled at Adela's tactfulness towards Nick. Usually this woman was quick with hugging people she knew for five minutes, she loved hugging, but now she just shook hands with Nick and then stepped back to give him some room. And Bobby doubted that Nick or the Winchesters had told her what had happened to Nick.

"I have your books in the back, Bobby." Adela said but her attention stayed on Nick. "You wouldn't mind helping an old lady with a heavy box of books, would you?" She smiled at Nick.

"You're not old."

"Old enough to shame you into doing the work for me." Adela replied easily and Nick couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Woman, you are something." Bobby adjusted his cap and didn't let on how glad he was that it wasn't him stuck with that box. Books were heavy.

"Took you that long to notice?" She led the way to the back where in a corner Bobby's books waited for them. The cardboard box didn't look like much but with books that was deceptive.

However, that wasn't the only box in the room and it was far from being the largest. Usually the three of them would fit in the back room easily, leaving enough space for Adela to gather the thing she kept in the shelves at the back without any kind of trouble. Now Bobby wasn't even sure where to put his feet.

"What is all this?" Bobby had a look around. Most of the boxes were closed but some were open, showing books and things wrapped up in newspaper pages.

"This idiot had no idea what his father's collection is worth." She answered with a smug grin. "I really hope his old man was cremated because if he ever finds out his son sold the work of his lifetime for a fraction of its worth." She let out a soft whistle. "He's going to haunt his son's ass."

Nick made a surprised noise at her choice of words but Bobby just shook his head in amusement.

"The only thing is that my back is protesting already at the very thought of unpacking and cataloging all this." She made a wide gesture around the room. "Guess I ain't getting younger."

"I'm telling you for years to get some help." Bobby replied not unkindly because he knew exactly what she was talking about. He wasn't getting younger, too.

"And I'm telling you that I can't just grab someone off the street. Won't be much of a help if they freak out as soon as somebody asks about books on virgin sacrifices or if we have dried lamb liver in stock." She tapped the box in front of her with the tip of her shoe. "At least get this out of here so I can actually turn around."

Bobby stepped back to give Nick some room to pick up the box but the boy didn't move. Instead he had a thoughtful look around the crammed room.

"I could help you with this." He offered shyly, avoiding eye contact with both of them.

"Thank you, Nick." She patted his arm. "But you don't have to. I wanted to shame you into carrying this one box and not going through this mess here. Don't worry, I'll be fine."

"No, please." Nick's voice suddenly had a desperate edge. "I'd love to help. If you want me to."

Adela, clearly at a loss, threw a glance at Bobby who was holding his breath at the scene in front of him. He wasn't sure if this was a good idea, leaving Nick with an almost stranger, but on the other hand he was proud of the boy for offering this. Reluctantly he gave Adela a little nod.

"If you insist." She agreed. "But I'm paying you. This is going to be honest work so you'll get honest money for it."

"Yes, ma'am." Nick grinned at her.

"Okay, take this out to the car and then we can start." Once again she tapped the box and this time Nick didn't hesitate to carry it out.

"Something I should know?" Adela asked when Nick was out of earshot and Bobby wasn't surprised that she knew that Nick was a little off his game at the moment. But which hunter wasn't?

"Keep your distance." Bobby answered after he'd thought about the question. "He doesn't like people too close. This is the first time he isn't with Dean or Sam, I am actually surprised I could pry him off Dean, so I have no idea how he will react." He adjusted his cap. "But I think he's going to be fine."

Adela nodded at that. "I call if something happens but I think we'll get along."

Bobby hoped so. Then Nick was back and Bobby had no excuses left to stay. But he promised to pick Nick up in a few hours and reminded him to call if he wanted to get picked up earlier.

Bobby left the store and sat in his car for a long minute with an uneasy feeling in his guts.

_This is good,_ he reminded himself. Nick went out of his shell on his own accord and that was really good. _Dean's going to kill me._

With a sigh he started the engine. The sooner he got going the sooner he could go back and bring that boy home.

"Hey, Earl." Bobby entered the liquor store and greeted the man behind the counter.

"Bobby." Earl answered but he didn't sound that friendly today.

_Maybe trouble with a customer,_ Bobby thought and went to get his things. He'd bought his liquor here for years so he could find his way around blindly and a minute later he placed the bottles on the counter. More than usual but he had three young men in his house who all weren't strangers to hard liquor.

"Heard your nephews are in town." Earls said while he ringed the bottles up.

"Yeah." Bobby searched for the right bills. "You know how they are, only coming by for a visit when they need a place to rest up for a while."

"Heard they're not alone this time." Now Earl gave him a hard look. "Never thought they would besmirch you and your house like that. I'm telling you, I would have thrown them out right on the spot."

Agape Bobby stared at him.

"You're a nice guy, Bobby." Earl leaned forward and his tone was too friendly all of a sudden. "Always a good customer. But you should think about how to deal with such obscenity under your roof. It would be a shame to lose a good customer like you."

Bobby fisted his money before Earl could snag it out of his hand.

"You know what?" He stuffed the bills back in his pocket. "You already lost your _good customer_."

Muttering under his breath Bobby left the store.


	36. Chapter 36

Nick wasn't sure why he went with Bobby in the first place. After the shooting disaster it seemed like a good idea to get away for a while and get his head free. And he figured with Bobby around everything would be fine. It wasn't that he would have to interact with people that much on this little trip and he wouldn't have to touch more than maybe a hand of another person if at all.

So yeah, Nick was a nervous and he missed Dean the second Bobby steered the car out to the road but he was okay.

Their first stop was at _Inquiring Minds_ and Nick relaxed. He loved the bookstore and he really liked Adela.

Browsing the shelves everything else was forgotten. There was so much interesting stuff. By the time Adela had time for them Nick was up to four books he would love to buy but sadly he didn't have any money and for sure he didn't want to ask Bobby to buy them for him. So he put them back with a sigh but kept the titles in mind. Maybe another time.

Adela greeted him with his full name, he was surprised that she even bothered to remember his name, and they shook hands but before it became too uncomfortable she stepped back and Nick breathed easier.

Then he was tricked into doing the heavy lifting for her. He didn't mind, though, and would have offered to do it anyway as soon as he saw the box full of books.

But that was not the only box in the room and he wondered what was inside the other ones. He saw a few books and wrapped up things but there was so much more.

So when Adela complained about her back and how hard it was to find a helping hand, how could he not offer his help?

The words were out of his mouth before he had time to think this through, which was probably good because if he'd thought about it, he would have never offered to stay with Adela while Bobby left to get his stuff done. Adela was nice and all but he hardly knew her.

Nick carried the box to Bobby's car with a constant stream of _what am I doing, what am I doing, what the fuck am I doing?_ running through his head. At the car he had to stop and catch his breath and that had nothing to do with the heavy box.

When he came back in he was close to withdraw his offer. He was sure that at least Bobby would understand and Adela wouldn't be too disappointed but then he saw the boxes with their mysterious content and he would get paid for this and it was only for a few hours, right? He could do this. He could give Bobby a call if he wanted to leave early. No problem, right?

Nick rubbed his sweaty palms at his jeans and watched Bobby leave.

"So, ehm … where do I start?" Nick looked helplessly around the stuffed room and hoped Adela wouldn't notice the tremble in his voice. This was about to turn out to be the second bad idea of the today, he was sure of it.

"First of all." She let out a sigh but her gaze on him wasn't unkind. And not pitying either. "Nick, relax. Breathe."

"That obvious?" He tried to laugh it off but he didn't have enough air in his lungs.

"Look, I don't know what happened to you." She said. "But I do know that something happened to you. Something bad."

Nick nodded, not sure where she was heading with this. And if he liked the direction.

"I just wanted to say, don't torture yourself because you have the feeling you have to do this." She locked eyes with him. "If I'm too close, tell me to back off. If you need a breather, just step outside for a moment. If you want to call Bobby, call him. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Good, then let's get started." She rubbed her hands and dragged the first box out of the corner.

First they had to know what they were dealing with because the collection came without an inventory list. Nick's main job was to sort the books to different piles and to make a list so they could actually find the books. The other stuff had to be unwrapped and sighted but most of the time Nick had no clue what the object in his hand even was. That was Adela's part.

It was the middle of the day so the store was open and Adela had to attend customers which left Nick in the back room by himself most of the time.

Books were heavy, Nick found out pretty soon, especially the old leather-bound tomes which he had to handle with special care. The constant up and down to pick them up didn't make it easier.

It was slow and hard work but to his surprise Nick had fun. He didn't hurry too much, he wanted to do this right, and even took the time to have a glance at the inside of a book if a title caught his interest.

"How is it going?" Adela asked and placed a tray with a glass of orange juice and a plate of cookies in the corner where it was less likely to spill something and ruin a book.

"Slow." Nick admitted. "I doubt I can finish this today."

"This ain't one day's work." She reassured him with a smile and passed him the juice which he drank greedily. This was dusty work, too. "Imagine how long I would sit on this alone."

She left the door open so she would notice if somebody came into the store and had a look at the last thing Nick had unwrapped. A bowl of some kind with ugly ornaments.

"What is this?" Nick asked. When he had touched it, it had felt slimy even if it was completely dry.

"This was used to collect the blood of human sacrifices." She sat it aside and wiped her hands on her pants. "Black magic."

"Is it dangerous?" Nick asked, suddenly feeling uneasy. He'd read enough about the occult to know that some things were better left untouched.

"Don't worry, nothing in here is dangerous." She sounded sure.

"But you said you don't know what's in there." He gestured at the unopened boxes. "What makes you so sure there's nothing dangerous here?"

"Two reasons." She grinned at him which made her twenty years younger. "First, the idiot I bought it from packed all this by himself and he's still in one piece. And second, this place is safer than Bobby's. Believe me, nothing dangerous can get in here without at least triggering something."

Nick had seen the symbols on the sign above the door and thinking about it, Adela sat at the source of knowledge if she didn't know how to protect herself, who did?

"I couldn't help but notice your bracelet." She pointed at his wrist. He was wearing it for a while now, most of the time he forgot it was even there but now he raised his arm to have a look.

"What about it?"

"May I?" She asked and waited for his permission to take his wrist in her hands. "Those are some strong wards of protection. Dean gave this to you?"

_And Sam_ , he wanted to add but couldn't. "For our first anniversary."

"One reason more to always wear it." She let go of his arm. "Wear it. Always."

"I do." So far he had worn it because it had been a gift from Sam and Dean for a very special occasion and yes, it had helped him against the succubus but now he saw it with new eyes. This wasn't just a nice gift, this was something that actually protected him. From things he should never have to know about. Okay, back then he would have called Sam and Dean crazy if they had told him that this bracelet would protect him from evil.

Adela went through a few other objects and took the time to explain them to Nick. One or two even she wasn't sure about and they went into a special box.

"This is going to be a lot of research before we're done with all this." She let out a sigh but grinned like a kid in a candy store and Nick's heart jumped at the _we_. He would like to come back the next day to finish this. And probably the whole next week if he looked at the piles of unopened boxes.

But before he could say anything the phone rang.

"Rufus Turner?" Adela asked when she heard who was on the other end. "Haven't heard from you in a while. What do you need?"

She listened for a moment.

"You wanna do small talk or tell me what I can get for you?"

In the following moment of silence Nick heard the bell announcing a customer.

"Nick." Adela covered the mouth piece with her palm. "Could you go up front? Just keep an eye on him for a minute, would you?"

Nick's mouth went dry at that but he nodded. It wasn't that he had to attend the customer or something. He just had to make sure he didn't get handsy on the cash register or took of with a book.

"Good day, sir." Nick greeted the customer because he figured he couldn't do something wrong with being polite. The clerk's uniform the young man was wearing looked familiar and Nick remembered seeing him the other day. Probably a regular who wouldn't ask where the historical section was or something.

The man looked up from the book he was studying and glared at him.

Unsure how to proceed Nick took a step back.

"Feel free to have a look around, sir." He said. "Ms. Blake will be here to assist you shortly."

"Good." The man huffed in barely concealed anger. "Wouldn't want a homo to touch my books anyway."

Shocked Nick stared at him. He had been called names before, no big deal, but this was the last place he'd expected it.

"Tell me." The man said in a low voice as if they were sharing a secret. "Heard you take it up the ass for both of them? Brothers, that gives you the special kick, doesn't it? Big guys too, bet they're hung like donkeys but you like that, don't you? Little fairy?"

_He knows,_ Nick couldn't breathe. _How can he know?_

The man shoved past him and made a show of brushing off his shoulder where he'd bumped into Nick. Dumbfounded Nick stumbled backwards and could only stare at him.

_How could he know?_

"What you looking at, fag?" The man spat with an evil grin.

"He's looking at the homophobic asshole that's now leaving my store." The wrath of Adela was upon the man and now it was him taking a step back. "And don't bother to come back, you're banned from my store."

"Don't want the shit of a queer-lover anyway." He threw the book he had still in hand in her general direction and stomped out of the store. The door slammed shut behind him.

"Nick, you okay?" Adela reached out to grab his shoulder but stopped in mid-air and let the hand drop back to her side.

"I'm fine." Nick forced himself to take a deep breath and she threw him a doubtful look.

"I am fine." He repeated and this time it sounded a little more convincing. "It's not the first time somebody calls me names. He knew quite a few, I have to give him that, very creative." He babbled but there was one question running circles in his head.

"How did he know?" Adela ask.

"Uh?" Nick fought against the rising panic. Had he asked that aloud? What had she heard? Did she know about the three of them?

"How did he know?" Adela repeated her question. "I mean, people notice at first sight that I'm black and I've dealt with harassment more often than I care to count but unless you made dewy eyes on him, how did he know?"

"Oh, yeah." Relieved Nick breathed a little bit easier. "He was here the other day, too. Maybe he saw me and Dean …"

Adela nodded in understanding, satisfied with the explanation. Nick on the other hand wasn't satisfied with that, not at all. That guy could have seen him and Dean, sure, but that didn't explain how he knew about Sam.


	37. Chapter 37

By the time Bobby was back to pick him up Nick was engrossed again in the books and that one question _How did he know?_ was reduced to a small whisper in the back of his mind.

"Thanks for your help, Nick." Adela shook his hand and then placed some money in his palm. "We are far from done here, so if you like …? I could use your help. What do you say, tomorrow at nine?"

"Sure thing." Nick hurried to say. The last hours had been fun and he had earned some money, so yeah, he was in for more. But then he hesitated. "I don't have a car …"

He threw a side-glance at Bobby. He couldn't expect the man to play his chauffeur but if he asked Dean or maybe Sam?

"Let that be the last of your worries." Bobby jumped in. "Tomorrow nine o'clock you'll be here and if I have to kick Dean's ass out of bed myself."

"I wanna see that." Nick grinned openly and pictured the scene in his head. But he made a mental note to ask Sam first, out of the two of brothers he was the early riser.

"Then it's settled." Adela said with an amused eye on Bobby.

"Oh, one other thing." Nick hold up his hand with the money. "Before we leave, I want to buy a book."

He spent half of his money on one of the books he'd been eying earlier that day. His money, he couldn't even describe how good it felt to actually spent his own money for once.

On their drive back he hold the book in his lap and grinned like an idiot.

"How was it?" Bobby asked after a minute of silence. "Are you really okay with going back tomorrow?"

Nick thought about that for a moment and that guy with his accusations was back on his mind. He had to talk to Sam and Dean about that, but otherwise?

"It was great." Nick answered honestly. "And yes, I want to go back tomorrow."

Back at the salvage yard Nick helped Bobby to get his things inside and then Bobby left to see what Dean had gotten done in the meantime.

"Hey." Sam greeted him when Nick plopped on the couch in the study. Sam hadn't bothered to make his _bed_ and his pillow and the blanket still lay out in the open.

"How was your trip with Bobby?" Sam abandoned his book and came over to sit next to Nick.

"Actually, I spent the afternoon with Adela." He fished out the rest of his money and showed it to Sam with a proud smile. "And I earned some cash."

Nick told Sam about the collection and about the mess it was in.

"It will take forever to sort out." Nick sighed theatrically. "Could you give me a ride over there tomorrow? Bobby has already threatened to kick Dean out of bed to drive me but …" He shrugged.

"Sure, no problem." Sam replied easily. "I would like to have a look at this collection anyway. Sounds awesome."

"It is." Nick smiled fondly but then sobered up. There was this other thing, though. After a glance around to make sure that Bobby wasn't standing behind him Nick cleared his throat.

"There was this guy." He started and immediately had Sam's full attention.

"What guy?" Sam turned with one leg bent, foot tucked under his other knee, and rested his arm on the back of the couch so that he was fully facing Nick.

"He was there the other day, too." Nick blew out a breath. "And maybe he's seen us then but that wouldn't explain …"

"Would what explain?"

"He knew, Sam." Nick said. "He knew about us. He came in and called me a homo and a fag and things like that." He shook his head at that memory.

"Oh, Nick." Sam gave him the puppy dog eyes.

"C'mon." He waved him off. "I've been called worse things than that. But he knew. How could he know?"

"You said it yourself." Sam reminded him and Nick knew exactly what his next words would be. "He saw us the other day. You and Dean weren't exactly hiding."

"He knew about you." Nick dropped the bomb.

"What?"

"He knew, Sam." Nick repeated now with a hint of frustration in his voice. "He knew it's not a me and Dean only thing. He knew about the three of us."

Now it was Sam who didn't know what to say.

"How …?" Was all he managed at the moment.

"My question exactly." Nick rested his elbows on his knees and let his head hang. He had thought about this for a while now and all he could think of was that either at the bookstore the guy could have come to the right conclusion or later in the field. If he'd seen them on the hood of the Impala it must have been quite obvious that they were in this together.

"Either way, it's another thing I've ruined for you."

"What do you mean?" Sam asked and he was close now, leaning forward, not quite touching Nick but being there, offering comfort.

"I was the one who dragged Dean out of the closet." Nick counted. "I kicked you out of his bed."

"You didn't …" Sam started but Nick interrupted him, tugging at the blanket.

"You are sleeping on the couch, Sam." He reminded him. "Dean is your boyfriend and you sleep on the damn couch while I've taken over your place in his bed. And now this." It was too much. His whole body shook with sobs and he blinked against the tears. "Maybe I should just leave."

"Hey." Sam's strong arms were around him and a second later Nick's head rested on Sam's chest. "Nothing of this is your fault."

Nick let Sam rock him like he was a baby and the sobs already abated.

"Bobby's cool with Dean being bi, so no harm done there." Sam started to rip Nick's self-accusations to shreds. "And in case you forgot, Adela was the one who outed me."

Sam gave Nick a moment to let the words sink in.

"As for the couch, we have to be brothers here anyway and it's not like Dean's cheating on me or something like that." Sam reminded him. "You're his boyfriend, too."

"You were with him first." Nick mumbled into Sam's t-shirt. "He's your boyfriend."

"And you are our boyfriend." With a gentle finger under Nick's chin Sam lifted his head and studied him for a moment. "Hey, we're in this together. You and me and Dean. We are the damaged parts of a pink frosted donut, remember?"

"With sparkles." Nick added. "Yeah, I remember."

And then Sam kissed him. Their lips met and Nick closed his eyes and kissed back.

They were in Bobby's study, right in the open for anybody to see who might come in, and Nick couldn't care less.

With a desperate whimper Nick fisted Sam's hair with both hands, holding him close, while his tongue found its way into the hot wetness of Sam's mouth. Under Nick's sudden attack Sam fell backwards right into the pillow as if he'd left it there for this very purpose.

Never breaking the kiss Nick landed on top of him and Sam spread his legs to fit Nick between his thighs. Rutting like a horny teenager Nick moved against Sam, bringing their stiffening cocks together with the delicious roughness of their jeans between them.

Sam slung his legs around Nick and crossed his ankles at the small of Nick's back, drawing him even closer.

Sam broke the kiss and mouthed his way along Nick's jawline until he placed wet little kisses behind his ears and nibbled at his earlobe.

"That's it." Sam's voice was a hot whisper in his ear that sent shivers down his spine and right into his now fully erected cock trapped behind the zipper. Nick wanted to reach down to change that but Sam caught his hands and twisted his arms around until they were on Nick's back where Sam hold his forearms together with one hand, pressing Nick down on him at the same time.

"Nothing of that." Sam whispered again. "No hands. You're going to dry hump me until you come in your pants."

"Fuck." Nick rubbed against him in earnest know, bringing their cocks together. One of Sam's legs had slipped off his back so he actually had room to move.

"Yeah, just like that, like the horny little bitch you are." Sam bit Nick's neck hard, sending a jolt of pain through him, before he soothed the spot with little licks. And repeated the procedure half an inch to the left. The sharp pain of the bite and then kissing it all better. In one clear moment Nick wondered what his neck would look like after Sam was done with him but then the moment was over and there was only pleasure.

His movement lost its rhythm, becoming more frantic, more desperate, and he was close, so close.

"C'mon, Nick." Sam's voice was back. "You can do it. Come like this. Cream your pants. Come."

Nick threw his head back and his body followed as far as his bound arms allowed it to while he jerked his hips uncontrolled against Sam's groin.

He rode out his orgasm with Sam's name on his lips and only when Nick lay exhausted on top of him Sam let go of Nick's arms.

As soon as he had the chance Nick slipped his hand between their bodies and down the front of Sam's pants.

"You don't have to." Sam said but looked at Nick with dark eyes and didn't stop him.

"I want to." Nick kissed him again and gave Sam's cock a light tug. It lay full and heavy in Nick's hand and it only took a few strokes for Sam to buck into Nick's fist, coating the inside of his pants.

"Great." Sam muttered and collapsed back into the pillow. "Now we'll both run around like we've shit our pants."

Nick burst out laughing and nearly rolled off the couch if it hadn't been for Sam holding him.

Nick would have loved to stay like this for a while longer but now he became aware of where they actual were. If Bobby found them like this …

They came up to a sitting position, far enough apart to look innocent. Okay, their flushed faces, ruffled hair and disarranged clothes wouldn't fool anybody but it was the best they could do. At least until Nick felt steady enough again to manage the stairs and change into a clean pair of underwear. The cooling mess in his pants was anything but pleasant and the way Sam tugged at the front part of his jeans he had a similar problem.

"Okay, let's get cleaned up before Bobby catches us." Sam stood up and dragged Nick up with him. Sam took the bathroom downstairs and Nick the one upstairs and yes, all the way they walked like the had shit their pants and Nick couldn't stop snickering at that. Sam flipped him off before he closed the bathroom door behind himself and still laughing Nick made his way upstairs.

Neither of them noticed the shadow hastily retreating to the kitchen behind them.


	38. Chapter 38

Nick and Bobby carried the box of books and Bobby's other stuff inside and after that Bobby went to check on Dean.

He had gotten quite some work done and was in the midst of cleaning up when Bobby arrived.

"Hey." Dean threw a wrench in the toolbox. "You've been out for hours, is Nick okay?"

There was honest concern in his voice but Bobby could reassure him.

"He's fine. Better than fine, actually." He looked over his shoulder to make sure that Nick hadn't followed him for some reason.

"Yeah?" Dean raised an eyebrow at him.

"We were at Adela's first and she made a comment that she could use help with a collection she just got in. And believe it or not, Nick offered to help her." Bobby leaned at the work bench and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "I did my errands and he stayed with her, sorting books, for hours. And he wants to go back tomorrow."

"Wow." Dean leaned next to him, absently cleaning his hands with a rag. "That's good, right? I mean he has to start doing things on his own again." He thought about that for a moment. "And he's fine? No panic attacks, nothing?"

"Adela paid him and he bought a book." Bobby informed him. "And he was grinning like an idiot on the drive back. So I guess he's fine."

Bobby gathered a few tools he usually kept in the basement.

"I'll bring these in and then I'm going to start dinner." He announced. "Don't leave a mess behind."

"When have I ever …?" Dean started but ducked his head when he saw Bobby's face. "I'll be in in a few minutes."

On his way to the basement Bobby didn't really pay attention to Sam and Nick sitting on the couch in the study but when he came up again, he heard Nick talking.

"I kicked you out of his bed." Nick said angrily, frustrated, but Bobby couldn't make sense out of that. He was in the middle of he hallway when he heard Nick's clarification.

"You are sleeping on the couch, Sam." Nick stated and so far the deeper meaning was still lost to Bobby but then Nick dropped the bomb. "Dean is your boyfriend and you sleep on the damn couch while I've taken over your place in his bed. And now this."

Bobby must have misheard that part. No way Nick had just said what he thought he had, had he? There was some sobbing and Bobby dared to peek around the corner. The back of the couch was facing him but he saw Sam's head and shoulders standing out over the back and a bit of Nick's mob of hair. It looked like Nick was crying in Sam's arms while Sam rocked him like he was a kid. Bobby retreated to the kitchen before Sam could spot him but then he was stuck there. There was nowhere else to go without risking to get seen and if he was honest to himself Bobby didn't want to leave now. Sam and Dean? Boyfriends? That couldn't be. He would have noticed.

_Like you have noticed that Dean has a boyfriend for a year now? That both of them look at men, too? You haven't noticed much lately, haven't you?_ A mean little voice in the back of his head mocked him but there wasn't much he could say against it. So he stayed where he was and hoped for Sam and Nick to clear this up. Somehow. There had to be another explanation.

Then they talked about damaged donuts and at that point Bobby was sure they'd lost their minds. Both of them. That was the explanation, plain and simple.

The next noises he heard Bobby couldn't place at first but when it dawned on him, he had to sneak another peek just to confirm that they weren't doing what it sounded like they were doing.

There wasn't much to see, though. Both their heads were below the level of the back of the couch now but at one end Nick's feet stuck out and then Sam's feet and shins appeared and closed around what looked like Nick's back. It didn't take much imagination to figure out their position but if it was still unclear Sam saying things like: "No hands. You are going to dry hump me until you come in your pants." left little room for interpretation.

Face bright red and a little unsteady on his legs Bobby somehow found his way back to the kitchen. His first thought was to down a bottle of Jack, hoping for a blackout, so he could pretend the last few minutes had never happened. The noises coming from the study assured him that, yes, it was happening right around the corner and it wasn't even Dean and his boyfriend, something he wouldn't have want to run into but something Bobby could have dealt with.

This was Sam with Nick, humping each other like teenagers on the couch, and if Bobby had understood their earlier conversation right, this wasn't even Nick cheating on Dean. Or Sam cheating on Dean, because apparently Sam and Dean was a thing as well. No, this were only two parts of a three-way thing.

Bobby needed a drink. But he feared the slightest noise would give him away. Busy or not, Sam was a hunter and at some level he probably had his ears out to not get caught by Bobby. Too bad that Sam didn't seem to be on top of his game today otherwise he would have noticed Bobby on his way down to the basement.

Bobby tried to block out the moans and the keening and the sharp little yelps coming from Nick which sounded suspiciously painful. Then Sam started with the dirty talk.

Bobby just wanted this to be over. So it was some kind of relief for him too when Nick, wordily encouraged by Sam, finally came, chanting Sam's name. Then there was a moment of nearly silence, just heavy breathing, and Bobby really hoped that this was it. But Sam murmured something and then it was unmistakably him moaning before he came with a bitten back scream.

First there was more heavy breathing, then some shifting and mumbled words and then Nick burst out laughing.

When Sam said that they should get cleaned up before Bobby caught them, it was Bobby who had to hold back the hysterical laughter bubbling in his chest.

Then, finally, they were gone and Bobby poured himself a generous drink. And a second one which emptied the bottle and he didn't have a spare one. Damn Earl. But he needed it so he drank what he had at hand. Bracing himself at the counter Bobby shook his head as if he could shake off the unpleasant thoughts running circles in his mind.

Sam and Dean, together like this? Should he consider himself lucky that it had been only Sam and Nick he'd walked into? That it was sheer luck he hadn't found Sam and Dean like this? They were brothers for Christ's sake.

_Or you could have found all three of them_ , the mean little voice provided.

A part of him wanted to call them in, all three of them, and demand an explanation. That part of him sounded suspiciously like John Winchester which was one reason he didn't do it.

The other reason was Nick. Bobby liked the boy, he really did, and Nick had been through some traumatic stuff lately and getting yelled at and maybe kicked out of the house could have fatal consequences for him.

Sam and Dean? That was a whole different can of worms, one Bobby wasn't sure he wanted to open just yet. They were brothers.

Bobby took a deep breath and made a decision. For now he would act like nothing had changed, like he was still the oblivious idjit they could fool. He would sleep over it. In the heat of the moment this could only go wrong, he'd had to pick up the pieces after one of John's outbursts a few times too often to make that mistake. After all, Sam and Dean were like sons to him and Bobby was well aware of the fact that their relationship with him, or his with them, could get damaged beyond repair if he wasn't careful. And he wasn't ready to risk that based only on the few words he'd heard.

It shone a new light one the question of why Dean hadn't told him, though.

Bobby stuffed the raging John Winchester part of his mind somewhere deep and started dinner.

When Dean strolled in a minute later everything looked like always and Bobby had his features under control again.

"Set the table, would ya?" Bobby put Dean to work but observed him out of the corner of his eye, searching for something off. And found nothing.

During dinner Bobby stayed mostly quiet but nobody noticed because Nick was babbling nonstop about his day at Adela's. Bobby couldn't help but notice the affection and love in both Winchesters' eyes while they listened to Nick. However, he also noticed the way they looked each other in the eye from time to time. Bobby had seen that look between them a million times before and he couldn't even remember if there had been a time they hadn't looked at each other this way but now there was a whole new layer of meaning in those short glances.

Another thing he noticed was that Nick now wore one of Dean's button-down flannel shirts over his own shirt. The high collar covered most of his neck but not enough. Bobby didn't want to stare but that was a hickey if he'd ever seen one. Still blooming with the imprints of teeth. Sam's teeth.

Dean had noticed it too and he threw his brother a questioning look but with Bobby around they said nothing and the glare Sam shot back could only be interpreted as _Dude, not now!_

It was such a brotherly thing to see it warmed Bobby's heart.

With the excuse that he wanted to read in peace for once Bobby turned in early but he didn't read and he didn't sleep either.

The sadistic part of his mind wondered what the three men in the house would do now with him out of the way.

Bobby lay fully clothed on his bed and stared at the ceiling until it was swallowed by the increasing darkness and tried to wrap his mind around the new information.

So, Dean was with Nick. That was nothing new and Bobby was fine with that.

Obviously Sam was with Nick, too. That was new and it had taken him by surprise but as long as Dean knew about this and was fine with it, Bobby guessed it was none of his business. And Dean had seen the hickey he hadn't placed on Nick's neck and his first reaction had been to look at his brother, so yeah, Bobby was pretty sure Dean knew about the Sam and Nick thing.

Then there was the whole Dean and Sam thing. For that Bobby had only a few words out of context he'd overheard. And c'mon, they had been talking about damaged donuts at the same time, so that wasn't exactly what Bobby called a reliable source.

Even if Nick was with both of them that didn't mean that Sam and Dean had a thing running, right?

Okay, Nick had clearly stated that Sam had been Dean's boyfriend first and Bobby couldn't think of any other way to interpret that.

Bobby considered himself open-minded and if three men wanted to be together, why not? As long as they were all okay with that kind of relationship and played with open cards he couldn't see anything wrong with that. But Sam and Dean were brothers.

No matter how he twisted and turned the situation, in the end it came down to that.

Bobby had chased a butt naked three-year-old Sam who didn't want to take his bath through the house.

Bobby had trained Dean at the shotgun.

Bobby had taught Sam to read Latin.

Bobby had had an open ear for a devastated Dean when Sam had left for Stanford.

Bobby had been more of a father to them than their actual father and he loved them like his own.

"You're brothers, dammit." He whispered into the darkness surrounding him.


	39. Chapter 39

Ishtar ended the call with a smile. Singer had his first encounter with one of her little flock. She couldn't get at them directly but for sure she could turn this town into queer hell. And with any luck the Winchesters and their little toy would be too busy dealing with the sudden hate to keep their guard up.

There was a noise behind her but she didn't bother to turn around. Jerry was playing with his fathers old camcorder lately, claiming it was for a school project. Did he really think she was that stupid?

But it kept him out of her way and she had everybody under her control Jerry could turn to anyway. There were a few women, teachers and police officers and such, she didn't have under her influence but for one, what could the kid prove with this videos anyway? There was no law against kissing and she wasn't abetting anybody to do something illegal, at least not over the phone where Jerry could hear.

And second, above every potential women Jerry could turn to for help was a man eagerly waiting to do whatever she asked him to do.

_Long live the gender inequality,_ Ishtar thought bitterly but as long as the system was running this way she had no calms taking advantage of it. It made her life easier, though.

Her phone rang again, CSG the little display informed her. He had called earlier to tell her that Singer and Fuck Toy were at the bookstore before he went over to have a look and maybe hear something of interest.

"What you got?" Ishtar asked without bothering with a greeting. The bookstore was still a blind spot, something she couldn't control, so every little piece of information Copy Shop Guy got out of there was worthwhile.

But then CSG told her what had happened at the bookstore and her excitement turned to anger. That idiot sounded even proud of himself.

"You got kicked out of the store." She recapped the crucial part of his statement.

"I may have gotten carried away a little bit." He admitted and she could hear him fucking grinning over the phone.

"Carried away?" Her voice rose and she didn't care if Jerry was filming her right now or not. "You are my eyes and ears in there and you got carried away? You're fucking banned from the store!"

"I'm sorry." Finally he seemed to realize that hadn't been his brightest moment. "I just thought …"

"You didn't think, you idiot!" Ishtar yelled at him. "It's not your job to think. You do what I tell you."

"But you …"

"Did I tell you to get banned from the store?" Ishtar interrupted his weak excuses. "Did I tell you that?"

"No, but …"

"Nothing but." Ishtar was pacing the living room now, drawing her fingers through her hair in frustration. "You fucked up."

"I'm sorry." He repeated meekly.

"You will be." She promised darkly, a plan forming in her mind. She needed to spare Tim for a while to keep him functional but she was hungry, always so hungry. "When your shift ends you go home and wait there for me."

"Yes." Fear, excitement and regret, so much emotion in one little word, it made her smile. Ishtar ended the call and in her mind she was already planning the night with CSG.

Oh, he would feel really sorry when she was done with him, that much was for sure. At least he was one of her better looking pets, with him she could have quite some fun.

"Too bad I still need him." She mumbled to herself. Even if he couldn't enter the bookstore anymore he still could have an eye on the coming and going next door.

CSG lived in a small apartment with neighbors all around so that was one thing Ishtar should keep in mind. She didn't want for anybody do call the police.

He opened the door and made an inviting gesture without lifting his head to meet her eyes.

"You tidied up for me?" She asked with amusement when she caught the scent of citrus. He blushed at that, and wasn't that cute, but didn't say anything while she made a round through his home. A living room and one bedroom, nothing fancy. "And you made the bed."

She returned to him and sized him up head to toe.

"You screwed up today." She said. "Lucky for you, you are in a spot where you can still be useful so you are going to survive this night."

At that his head snapped up. Apparently it had never occurred to him that she might kill him for his mistake. His eyes went wide with fresh fear.

"So here's the deal." She said as if he had a say in this and gave him a quick kiss. "You please me tonight, you please me very well, and I will forget your incompetence."

"Thank you." He licked his lips, unknowingly dosing himself with more of her venom.

"Get naked." She ordered and watched him with her arms crossed in front of her chest. He was a sight to see, she had to admit. A well-defined body and a pretty face with sinful lips. She hoped he knew how to put those to use but third time's a charm, right?

"Hands behind your head and keep your mouth shut."

He stood in the middle of the room, with his hands behind his head and his cock standing proud. Ishtar circled him, admiring him from every side.

"Nice ass." She smacked his ass cheek hard enough to leave a red mark for a moment. He flinched but kept silent. "Nice cock."

He jumped at that slap, bringing his hands down to cover his sensitive parts. At least he bit his lip to prevent himself from crying out.

"Hands up." She reminded him. "Don't make me say that again."

He nodded, eyes now a little bit too bright and she wondered how much it would take to make him cry. Not much, she guessed.

"Look." She raised her hand so he could see and turned it into the claw with talons sharp like razor blades. His eyes bulged and he made a strangled noise but stayed in pose.

With a smug grin she picked up his jeans, grabbing both legs where the knees would be with her still human hand. In morbid fascination he followed her claw with his eyes when she placed it in the crotch of the jeans. One sharp tug and the jeans fell apart in shreds.

He went white and for a moment she thought he would faint. His whole body trembled and tears were now running down his face and when she stepped closer he took a step back.

"Don't move." She whispered in his ear and fondled his by now flaccid cock with her clawed hand. It shrunk even farther under her touch.

"Please." He whimpered. "Don't. Please, don't. Don't do this, please."

She placed her fingertips behind his balls with a bit of pressure but without breaking the skin and rolled his junk in her palm. Adding more pressure to her fingertips she had him on his toes in a second. His body went rigid and he barely dared to breathe and he couldn't even shy away when she brought out her other claw and placed it on his chest where she felt his rapid heart under her palm.

"You know, I am disappointed in you." She scratched a fingernail over his nipple, leaving a red mark. He sucked in a sharp breath without moving his chest too much and screwed his eyes shut.

"Please." He whimpered. "I'll do anything. Please."

"I know you will." She scratched over his other nipple before she let go of him. Relieved he sagged down to his feet again. He was close to dropping his arms as well but remembered her order in the last second and kept his hands behind his head.

"Good boy." She praised and stroke his sweaty chest with now human hands before she leaned in and kissed him. She didn't want him completely mindless but at a level where he was aware of what she was doing to him but couldn't stop his body from obeying to her very command.

The fresh dose of venom made his cock twitch and blew his pupils wide.

"Correct me if I'm wrong." She circled his nipple with her finger. "But if I recall correctly, you asked Nick if he liked it up the ass and if the Winchesters were hung like donkeys, right?"

He gave her a short nod.

"I'm not hung like a donkey but I have this." She made a fist and his eyes went wide again. "And yes, you are going to take it up the ass." She made her point by slapping his ass cheek. He yelped and flinched but otherwise he didn't move.

"You know." She continued in a comradely tone. "I didn't have much luck with guys eating me out lately so how about this. You eat me out and if you do it good and I mean really, really good, I'll even prepare you properly before I put my fist in your ass. And if you suck at it like the other guys …" She raised her fist again and snapped it open with her claws out.

He was surprisingly good at eating pussy.

_The right motivation_ , she thought when she came down from a mind-blowing orgasm.

"Did I do good?" He asked still on his knees on the floor at the end of the bed with his head bowed.

"Good enough." She sat up and caressed his face, urging him to lift his head. "Come up here. Hands and knees, show me that sweet little ass of yours."

He got in positions and spread his legs.

"You better have something we can use as lube." She brushed the pad of her thumb over his twitching hole. He had hand lotion which Ishtar found rather appropriate for what she had in mind.

"I'll open you up, nice and slow." She squeezed some lotion into her hand. "You earned it."

"Thank you. Thank you." He cried in relieve and spread his legs a little wider.

True to her word she took her time, adding finger after finger and paying lots of attention to his prostate, before the widest part of her hand finally slipped past the rings of muscles. He keened caught between pleasure and pain. By then he had collapsed down to his elbows, was covered in sweat and was begging her to let him come.

She closed her hand inside him, knuckles brushing over his prostate, making him moan deep in his throat.

"You look good like this." She kissed the curve of his ass. "Move, fuck yourself on my fist."

He came like this, rocking back and forth on her fist, muscles clenching around her wrist. His body went limp and he lay panting and glistering with sweat in the wet spot. Ishtar bit her lip in anticipation at that sight.

"Well, that was a fun start, wasn't it?" She got her hand out, ignoring the noises of pain he made when her knuckles became stuck at the rim for a moment, and wiped it at the sheets.

"S...start?"

"Oh, honey." She brushed sweaty hair out of his face and kissed him. "We have all night."

In the morning he promised to never disappoint her ever again. And that was before he went through withdrawal.


	40. Chapter 40

"Are you two insane?" Dean yelled at them in a low hiss which would have been rather amusing if it hadn't been directed at Nick as well.

During the whole dinner Nick had fought against the urge to pull his collar farther up or to cover the hickey with his hand. But he hadn't done that. That would have only drawn Bobby's attention to it. Now, with Bobby gone and only them sitting at the kitchen table, Nick gave in to the urge and placed his palm on his neck. It was slightly swollen and a bit warm but not in an unpleasant way.

"Dean, look." Sam tried to calm his brother down. "Bobby didn't notice, everything is fine, right?"

"Next time you want to eat him alive." Dean pointed with his finger at Nick while he glared darkly at Sam. "Stay to spots he can cover up."

Dean looked from one to the other and all of a sudden Nick felt like he had smashed the neighbors window and got bawled out for that now.

"It kinda just happened." Nick said meekly. "Sorry."

Dean mumbled an "unbelievable" under his breath and only now Nick fully realized how easily Bobby could have caught them.

Dean shook his head but when he looked at them again, he had a lecherous smile on his lips.

"Don't leave me out here." He demanded with a glance at the door. "Where did it kinda just happen and what did kinda just happen?"

Nick and Sam exchanged a quick look.

"Dry humping on the couch." Sam answered both questions. "You should try it, he's like a needy dog humping your leg."

Nick leaned back in his seat and waited for things to happen. This was a classic opening for their little game called "We're ignoring Nick and driving him crazy with it." But instead of rising for the bait Dean stared at Sam.

"Are you insane?" Dean repeated his question. "On the couch? In the study? Right in the open? Are you fucking nuts?"

By now Nick only rolled his eyes while Sam spluttered half-baked excuses. It was dumb and risky and they would never do it again but it had happened. They couldn't change that.

"Shut up." Nick growled at Dean. "Would you already? No harm done. It's fine."

Before Dean could say anything to that Nick sealed his mouth with a kiss.

"I like the way you fight." Dean studied his face and then they kissed again. Needing to get closer Nick swung his leg over Dean and sat down in his lap.

"Wow." Dean protested, breaking the kiss. "What are you doing?"

Nick slung his arms around Dean's neck and gave him another quick kiss.

"I don't know." Nick gave it a thought while he ground his crotch against Dean's. "Dry humping my boyfriend?"

Behind him Sam snickered but didn't interfere.

"Bobby could come in any second." Dean reminded him.

"So?" Nick rolled his hips which coaxed a moan out of Dean. So he did it again. "It's not that he doesn't know about us."

"Isn't this a bit too much for one day?" Dean was still not convinced. "I mean … are you okay with this? If this is too soon, it's okay." He swallowed visibly and Nick just had to kiss that bobbing Adam's apple. But then Nick stopped for a moment, really thinking about the question.

"I am okay with this." He finally stated. "And with what we did the other day in the fields. But …" Now he had to pause, unsure how the put his uncertainty in words.

Sam left his chair and leaned on the table behind Nick and reluctantly placed his hands on his shoulders. Nowadays Nick always tensed up if somebody was close behind him but he melted into those hands gently kneading his neck.

"But?" Dean prompted when Nick didn't continue. "It's okay, anything you need."

"But … could I stay clothed?" Nick asked with a shy upward glance. "Mostly clothed at least?"

This was so stupid. They had been around each other naked for days at a time before and Nick had never felt uncomfortable. But now everything had changed.

It was Sam who answered, his mouth so close to Nick's ear that his lips brushed his earlobe.

"Of course." Was his simple answer. "Just talk to us. Tell us what you need, what you want. And what you don't want. It's okay."

Nick rested his head on Dean's shoulder with Sam still massaging his neck. Now and then Sam hit a tender spot but it was more pleasant than painful.

Nothing had really changed. They had always talked openly about the stuff they wanted to try out and if one of them wasn't into it they found a way around or did other stuff. And even if this wasn't a scene, Nick had his safe-word.

"What do you want?" Dean murmured and stroke his hair.

"I want you to take your cock out." Nick raised his head and leaned back into Sam to give Dean some room who studied him for another moment before he reached between them without breaking eye-contact.

Dean was barely half-hard but Nick changed that with canting his hips and grinding his jeans clad crotch against Dean's bare cock.

"Jesus." Dean's head fell back, mouth slightly open and Nick rolled his hips again, rough denim on sensitive skin, with his own cock now a bulge behind the zipper.

Sam's mouth found Nick's neck again but soothing this time, licking and kissing the marks he'd left there before while his hands slipped farther down. Sam reached around him and his fingers found the zipper and freed Nick's cock.

"Okay?" Sam mumbled in his ear and stroke the heated flesh to fullness when Nick gave him a nod.

Then Sam took both their cocks in his hand, bringing them together, and Nick fell back against him, mouth hanging open in a silent "ohh".

"Fuck, Sam." Dean had more of his voice left but the words were slurred into a moan and Nick felt Dean's cock pressed against his and Sam's hand stroking both of them in a firm grip.

Dean was leaning back, head rolling on the back of the chair, and Nick was slumped against Sam's chest, but they came together in Sam's hand. Joined in one point, all three needed to do this, to keep the balance. If one of them left everything would collapse.

_A well balanced act,_ Nick thought. _We're holding each other upright._

That simple fact combined with jolts of pleasure running through his groin drove Nick over the edge. He jerked into Sam's fist, rubbing against Dean in that sweet tightness, and screamed out his orgasm.

"Shh." Sam covered Nick's mouth with his other hand but didn't stop working their cocks with his right one. "Bobby will hear."

Nick bit his lip to keep himself silent while his body spasmed and Sam milked the last bit of come out of him. With the sperm now easing the way it was a new sensation and the cocks slipped without resistance through Sam's fist. Spent Nick relaxed into Sam, trusting him to hold him, while Sam increased the pace to bring Dean over the edge as well.

Nick squirmed in Dean's lap, the sensation now close to overstimulation, close to too much, and he whimpered behind the hand still covering his mouth.

But then Dean went rigid, a constant _fuckSamfuckfuckNickSamSamfuckNick_ on his lips and added thick ropes of come to the mess in their laps.

"That was awesome." Dean slumped back with a happy smile on his face and they both sighed in relief when Sam finally released their cocks.

"Open up." Sam ordered and brought his come-coated hand up to Nick's mouth.

Nick's tongue darted out and he had the first taste of their combined come. Watching Dean from behind half-closed lids who's gaze was fixed on Nick's mouth, Nick licked and sucked Sam's hand clean. One after the other he sucked the fingers in his mouth, tongue swirling around every digit until he'd slurped up every drop of come.

"Good boy." Sam praised him and placed a kiss behind his ear. And then Sam was gone but he dragged the table closer so that Nick had something to lean on. Confused Nick watched Sam going down to his knees next to them and he was about to ask what he was up to when Sam leaned forward and took Nick's spent cock in his mouth.

Hot and wet and too much. Nick trashed and only the table behind him and Dean's strong hands on his hips prevented him from falling off Dean's lap. He keened and panted and it was so good and way too much.

"Please. Please." He begged but had no idea what for. For Sam to stop or continue forever, it was all the same in his foggy mind.

"Sam." Dean breathed in clear disbelief when he watched his brother cleaning Nick up. Thoroughly Sam took his time to lick off the last bit of come before he let go of Nick's cock with a wet plop. Then he did the same to Dean. Lapping and slurping until the flaccid cock rested spit-wet but clean in the nest of short hair.

Work done Sam stood up but Dean drew him back down for a passionate kiss. He palmed the clearly visible line of Sam's so far neglected cock through the jeans.

Sam shuddered and bit his lip.

"Somebody has earned himself a reward." Dean promised and Sam's eyes fell shut. "Want me to go on my knees for you? Would you like that?" He ground the heel of his hand in Sam's groin making him grunt in pleasure.

"Or do you want my mouth?" Nick offered. "Me going down on you? Blowing you senseless? You want that?"

Both Winchesters looked at him as if that had been the last thing they'd expected to hear from him and Nick tried to ignore the little spark of disappointment. He wasn't fragile, dammit, he wasn't about to shatter any second now. But now Sam would choose him only because he wanted to support him.

Sam looked from one to the other as if he was pondering his options and Nick already regretted his offer. Not because he didn't want to give Sam head but because of the reason Sam would pick him.

"Both." Sam finally said. "I want both of you."

"You kinky little bastard." Dean chuckled and tapped Nick's leg to get him moving.

Above them Sam shrugged. "You offered."

Dean and Nick tucked themselves back in while Sam leaned on the edge of the table and opened his zipper.

They knelt at Sam's sides, facing each other, and then simultaneously gave Sam's cock a long stork with the flat of their tongues from base to tip.

"Fuck." Sam had the edge of the table in a white-knuckled grip. And he started to pant when they swirled their tongues around the head, dipping in the slit, tongues brushing against each other. Nick took the head in his mouth, sealing his lips just underneath it, and hollowed his cheeks, while Dean nibbled his way back to the base and down to Sam's balls, sucking one testicle in his mouth.

After a minute, by then Sam was bucking his hips and cursing under his breath, Nick and Dean locked eyes and silently agreed to switch places. They worked their way along Sam's cock with little licks and kisses and Nick added some teeth which never failed driving Sam wild, and then he was rolling a testicle in his mouth while Dean was nursing the head.

"I'm gonna … I'm gonna …" Sam gritted his teeth.

Dean bobbed up and down the shaft as far as he could without bumping heads with Nick while Nick scrapped his teeth over the sensitive skin of Sam's ball sack.

"Fuck."Sam bit his bottom lip and came down Dean's throat who didn't waste one drop and swallowed it all.

"I think we are all insane." Dean sat back on his heels and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "Or we just want to get caught."


	41. Chapter 41

At nine in the morning the next day Nick entered _Inquiring Minds_ , followed by Sam how had given him a ride. The store had just opened and there was no customer in sight.

"Nick Perkins." Adela was on him in a heartbeat, shaking his hand and with her other one on his shoulder she dragged him closer into a half-embrace.

"And Sam Winchester." Sam got the full on bear-hug which he returned with a wild grin.

"You couldn't get Dean out of bed, could you?" She asked with a wink and let go of Sam who made a show of catching his breath.

"As long as we're at Bobby's he likes to be the late riser among us." Sam replied easily. "He won't get that much sleep as soon as we're back on the road again, though."

Whatever you wanna interpret into that, Nick thought and shifted uncomfortable under Adela's gaze.

Nick wondered when they would be on the road again but he didn't ask. Sam and Dean had stayed longer than they usually would because of him already and he didn't want to think about the future just now.

Sam stayed for a few minutes to have a look at the collection but before he could engross himself in it Adela kicked him out.

"We have work to do here." Adela reminded him. "So either you help …" She made an inviting gesture and something like jealousy sparked in Nick. This was his. He loved Sam but this was his.

"Nah, I better leave you two to this." Sam clapped Nick's shoulder breathed in relief. "Give me a call when you're ready to get picked up."

A minute later Nick watched the Impala driving away.

"Just you and me now." Adela rubbed her hands. "C'mon, I have bloodwort tea and bagels in the back and a lot of boxes to unpack."

"Bloodwart?" He must misheard that one.

"Bloodwort. With 'o'." Adela corrected him with another wink. "You can call it Yarrow if you really want to but who wants to if you can call it bloodwort?"

Nick couldn't help but smile. "Okay, give me a cup of bloodwarts."

They ate their bagels and Nick tasted the tea. He hadn't expect it to taste even remotely drinkable if he was honest. The taste hit him by surprise.

"This is good." He licked his lips and held his cup out for a refill.

"I'll pack you a bag." She promised and filled his cup.

Like the other day Adela had to attend customers and so Nick was alone in the back room most of the time. However, that was exactly how he liked it. He worked in a steady pace without hurrying and he even took a moment to have a look at something interesting if it caught his eye now and then.

At times when Adela was with him they set the books mostly aside and focused on the objects. Adela had a way explaining things that made it fun listening to her and after a while Nick felt comfortable enough to ask questions on his own.

"Too bad you'll be gone soon." Adela put a vase aside. "I could use somebody like you around here."

"Is that a job offer?" Nick joked.

"Why not?" She cocked her head and looked at him considering. "But I know the Winchesters and they will be on the road again soon, taking you with them."

Nick wasn't sure about that but said nothing.

"Or not?" Of course she noticed. "Nick?"

She stepped closer but kept her distance, waiting for him to speak.

"I had my apartment." He crouched down with his back to her and took the next book out without really seeing it. "With my roommate. Aiden." The memories washed over him like a bucket of ice water. "Aiden is dead now."

Out of the corner of his eye he saw her crouching next to him.

"I'm sorry." She said in a low voice. "Was that how you met Dean?"

He turned to her in confusion but then it dawned to him what she meant.

"No, I knew him for a year before … that. But that was when I found out about …" He made a vague gesture, unsure how to phrase it, but she nodded in understanding.

"So you had your place and he visited you?" She guessed.

"We normally met in a motel room, you know, because of Aiden." That wasn't even close to the truth but he didn't want to explain the whole hooker thing as which his relationship with the Winchesters had started.

With a sigh Adela plopped down to sitting.

"My knees." She said with an apologizing smile and stretched her legs. "They ain't what they used to be."

"I know that feeling." And he wasn't talking about his knees.

"What about now?" She asked. "You could stay here in Sioux Falls if you want to."

"We haven't really talked about that yet." He admitted. So far it had seemed as if going with the brothers on the road was his only real option. Now Adela offered another one.

"Think about it." She said. "The offer stands."

"Thanks."

"And now." She stretched out her hands. "Help this old lady up, would you?"

He helped her to her feet and they went back to work.

They had been engrossed in the ornaments on a bronze spearhead for over an hour and only realized how late it had become when the bell announced a customer.

"I'm sorry." Nick felt the heat creeping in his cheeks. "I'm wasting time." She wasn't paying him for idling around.

"That was a profound discussion." Adela was already half-way through the door but she turned to wag her finger at him. "Don't you dare and feel ashamed for seeking knowledge."

The next hour or so Nick was on his own again and when he finally reached the bottom of the box he'd been working on all morning he took the last book out with a satisfied smile.

"One down and a zillion to go." He stretched his aching back, his muscles weren't used to this kind of work, and wiped his dusty hands on his jeans.

When Adela poked her head in the next time it was after two in the afternoon and Nick felt a little weak in the stomach. The bagels were long gone and this was hard work and he wouldn't mind a break and something substantial to fill his belly.

_You've gone with less for days longer,_ he reminded himself. This was far from the gnawing of real hunger he knew too well so he didn't say anything and just noted the title of the book he had in hand and put it on the correct pile.

He didn't want to look ungrateful or even lazy, however, Adela saw right through his act.

"My, look how late it is." She clapped her hands. "Time for a lunch break. You must be starving."

He kinda was but he hadn't thought of bringing any lunch so he opened his mouth to tell he that he was good but she had already some money in her hand.

"I can't leave the store." She said and put the bills in his hand. "Would you mind getting us some sandwiches? It's just a little bit down the street, you can't miss it. Try the one with egg salad if you want something really good."

Despite her chatting she looked him in the eye and the question there wasn't hard to read.

_Can you do this or is it too much?_

On the one hand Nick was grateful that she knew he had been through something and was considerate of that fact without prying for information but on the other hand he just wanted to be treated like everybody else.

"Sure." He took the money. "Actually, I am hungry and an egg salad sandwich sounds awesome. Thank you."

Following her instructions he found the place with ease, a little hole in the wall but judging by how crowed it was even after the lunch rush, it had to be good. Or the only place around.

Nick took his place in the line and kept himself busy with watching the people around him. The customers seemed mixed, some in business dress, some in clerk uniforms from the places around, Nick guessed, and others just casually dressed. All the voices melted together to a hum with only half a sentence sticking out now and then.

"What's the fag doing here?" A male voice asked somewhere behind him and when Nick turned he expected to see the man from the other day. But right behind him stood a woman followed by two men who Nick didn't know but neither of them showed any interest in him and Nick would have shrugged it off if it hadn't been for the woman who had turned around as well, glaring at one of the men behind her.

The line moved and everything seemed fine. Nick wasn't even sure if the insult had been directed at him, so yeah, he shrugged it off.

"… two doing it is icky enough but three?" Nick caught the last part of the sentence but couldn't make out where it came from. Just a fragment in the humming of voices around him.

"… brothers …" That came from behind him and he turned his head to the man who had insulted him earlier, or at least Nick thought it had been him but the man was looking in the other direction. The woman behind him gave him a questioning look and he hurried to look away.

"Is he walking funny? Bet they did it all night." That stood out clear but Nick had still no idea who'd said it. There were so many people around him but nobody seemed to show interest in him.

"Hey you, I don't have all day." That was the man behind him. "Move your ass or are you too exhausted?" He gave Nick a dark grin, insulting him without actually saying anything.

In front of Nick the line had moved and he closed the gap which wouldn't get them through this any faster but he didn't want to draw attention to himself.

"Stupid, little f…" The last bit was too mumbled to be understood but Nick could guess.

He fixed his eyes on the menu hanging over the counter as if he was studying it and focused on breathing. His chest felt too tight and he gulped in the air in short little gasps and he just wanted to get out of here.

"… a true Christian wouldn't allow … roof …"

"… they were so sweet little boys … who knew …?"

"… nowadays they let everybody in here …"

Panic started to pool in his belly and his vision grayed around the edges. He was about to bolt. But then it was his turn and he just needed to order the sandwiches and then he would be out of here.

"We don't serve your kind here." The man behind the counter looked at him as if he was some disgusting insect. "Get outta here. Now."

Nick just stared at him and couldn't believe what was happening.

But then the woman behind Nick stepped up.

"What the hell?" She raised her voice and pinned the clerk down with a fierce glare. "He hasn't done anything wrong. Why are you kicking him out? He's a paying customer."

The man looked like he wanted to disagree but another woman came up behind him.

"In my office, now." She scold the man now ducking his head and when he'd left, not without muttering under his breath and a death glare at Nick, she turned to Nick with a smile.

"I'm so sorry." She apologized. "What can I do for you? It's on the house."

Somehow Nick managed to order his sandwiches and to stand the insults, more or less hidden in the murmur all around, thrown at him. His food arrived and he even had enough sense to thank the two women sticking up for him before he turned to leave the place for good.

Nobody was directly looking at him but he felt watched and the voices didn't stop.

Then he saw her. Just for a second before her face vanished in the crowd. Her. The succubus. She winked at him.

Nick ran.


	42. Chapter 42

Bobby's house wasn't that new or that big so the insulation sucked and it was small enough to just throw your head back and yell and you would be heard everywhere in the house.

So when Bobby lay on his bed and tried to make sense out of the whole mess, he heard noises from downstairs. Thankfully too muffled to be clearly interpreted and Bobby didn't strain his ears and so he could tell himself that it was the TV that chanted _fuckSamfuckfuckNickSamSamfuckNick_ in Dean's voice.

Pulling his pillow over his head Bobby tried to silence the sadistic little voice in his mind that wondered about the logistics of three men having sex.

Dean and Nick, Sam and Nick, Dean and Sam, Dean and Sam and Nick.

His head started to hurt.

Later there were the noises of the three men getting ready for bed and quiet voices but nothing suspicious anymore and then silence fell over the house.

Bobby breathed easier now but he couldn't sleep until way after midnight. And when he did fall asleep, it was a restless sleep full of weird dreams he couldn't remember in the morning but which left him with an uneasy feeling.

This morning Bobby was up earlier than usual but he was sick of staring into the darkness and listening to the "But they are brothers." that was running in his head like a broken record.

He didn't go straight for the kitchen, though. Almost silent on sock clad feet he entered the study where Sam was sleeping on the too short couch.

Sam didn't stir and Bobby studied him for long minutes. His little boy had gotten big.

Nick's words echoed in his mind. That Sam had been kicked out of Dean's bed because of Nick.

Nick's little guilt-trip was nonsense, nothing of this was his fault, but Bobby couldn't help but wonder if it was his. Sam was sleeping on the couch because of him. Because they couldn't trust Bobby with the truth. And it hurt to admit, they were right.

"He's your brother." Bobby whispered too quietly to disturb Sam. "How could you?"

Or had it been Dean who had started this? He was the older one, after all. Which led to the unpleasant question of when it had started. Before Stanford? Bobby remembered how devastated Dean had been back then and that too looked different now.

Bobby forced himself to stop that train of thoughts. His decision from last night still stood. He needed to know more before he did something drastic.

By the time Nick came into the kitchen, hair still damp from the scalding hot shower he had every morning, Bobby had read the paper front to back and was nursing his third coffee.

"Morning." Nick greeted him and Bobby poured him a coffee.

"Dean's still sleeping?" Bobby asked.

"Yeah." Nick tried his coffee and let out a satisfied sigh. "But Sam offered a ride so as much as I'd like to see it, no need for kicking Dean's ass out of bed. Sorry." He gave Bobby a sweet smile and Bobby's heart just melted for this boy.

It was easy to forget what this boy had been through just a few weeks ago. And here he sat like nothing had happened and Bobby was certain that Sam and Dean had played a huge part in that. Nick was strong on his own but his relationship with the brothers had certainly helped.

True to his word Sam was up not long after that and to Bobby's surprise they all sat in comfortable silence at the kitchen table, enjoying their coffees. It was way less awkward than Bobby had feared.

Bobby observed their interaction with new eyes and now it made sense why Nick had so easily accepted Sam's support alongside Dean's while he wouldn't let anybody else even near. They were more than friends, knowing that now it was hard to believe that Bobby had missed that fact before. It was so plain obvious from how they looked at each other, how they touched. They were clearly in love.

By the time Sam came back from dropping Nick off, Dean had found his way down to the kitchen as well. Still in his sleepwear and with his hair sticking out in every direction he looked way too young for the coffee he was drinking.

"Look who's up." Sam grinned at his brother and the way they looked at each other Bobby wondered if they would kiss if he wouldn't be around. He didn't want to see them kissing, didn't even want to think about them kissing, but a part of him felt sorry they had to restrain themselves in his presence.

They left him with the dishes, again, Dean muttering about getting dressed and something he wanted to check on his car and Sam just tagged along when Dean went outside. So Bobby stood at the sink once again from where he had a good view on the Impala parked outside without being spotted easily himself.

Dean popped up the hood and bent over a little bit to have a look at the engine. The brothers talked for a moment while Dean tinkered with the car and when Dean stretched to reach something farther away Sam raised his hand and for a moment it looked like he wanted to grab his brother's ass but then he dropped the hand with a horrified expression on his face and a side glance towards the house. Sensing that something was wrong Dean straightened up and turned to his brother and just the way he stood there, closer than he should as a brother but completely comfortable with that closeness, made this sight more intimate than it could be with them kissing. Bobby felt like an intruder but didn't dare to move to not draw attention to himself.

Sam's gaze flickered once again to the house and Dean followed his line of sight and then stepped back from his brother. Stepping back, turning from lover to brother.

That one step changed everything.

They were hurting themselves, Bobby realized. They were hurting. For what? To keep this secret from Bobby. Because Bobby wouldn't understand. Because Bobby might yell at them and kick them out of his life. Bobby knew because last night he had thought exactly that, had considered kicking them out.

Bobby tried to mentally step back from what he knew about them, tried to blend out they were brothers, that he'd known them all his life as that. Brothers.

Nick didn't seem to have a problem with them being brothers and Bobby tried to see them like Nick would. He doubted the first thing they had told Nick was that they were brothers. Considering how their relationship had started they probably didn't even exchange names at first. So just two men being together.

Seeing it from that angle Bobby could understand why Nick didn't have a problem with this fact. To him it was just a fact. A random little thing to know about them that didn't really matter. Like the color of their eyes or the names of their parents.

On a rational level Bobby understood that angle but it wasn't his. He couldn't deny the fact that he knew them since they were little and first of all they were brothers to him.

But maybe he didn't have to deny anything. Maybe he could accept that they were more than brothers. Which wasn't that much of an extension of their brotherly relationship which, if Bobby was honest, was closer than it should be for brothers anyway.

How exactly Nick fit into this Bobby wasn't sure but he was willing to accept their relationship as whatever it was. First of all Sam and Dean were like sons to him and he couldn't see them hurt and with his eyes open now he saw them hurt all the time. As long as he was near, they had to play their role as brothers and deny themselves what they wanted to keep the facade up. And because of that they were hurting and Bobby couldn't stand that.

However, he had no clue how to solve this. He couldn't just tell them that he knew because yeah, that would be an awkward conversation. And even if he was willing to turn a blind eye on the whole brother thing this was fairly new to him and he still needed time.

So when Sam came in not long after that Bobby was in his study pretending that everything was normal. Sam turned on his laptop and they both worked in silence and everything was normal.

"You looking for a job?" Bobby asked. From his place he couldn't read what was on Sam's screen but he recognized newspaper articles.

"Dean's getting restless." Sam replied without looking up from the screen.

"And Nick?" Bobby wondered. "Are you going to take him with you?"

Now Sam looked up and turned to face Bobby.

"We haven't talked about that yet." He admitted. "And I don't know if Nick is ready to leave or not but him working with Adela is a good sign so we hoped …" He didn't elaborate what he hoped, maybe he didn't actually know what he was hoping for.

"No need to rush." Bobby folded his hands on top of the book he was reading. "You can stay here as long as you want."

The deeper meaning of that was lost to Sam, of course, but even in the new light Bobby's house was theirs.

"Thanks." Sam smiled at him in honest gratefulness. "We appreciate that, we do. But the succubus is who knows where and Nick has to live with what she did to him and I have the feeling he's ready to move on soon."

"This ain't something you just move on from."

"I know." Sam's face turned sad and only then Bobby remembered that it wasn't only Nick who that bitch had had her hands on. Granted, Dean's encounter had been years ago but seeing Nick and helping him through withdrawal for sure had brought some memories back. And the fact that this had been personal, of course. The succubus had left a message for Dean, had raped Nick for no other reason than to hurt Dean.

Dean was so good at hiding his feelings it was easy to forget that he was hurting as well. For Dean it had always worked best to just go on as if nothing bad had happened so being on the road again and killing a monster or two would be working best for Dean. What would be working best for Nick Bobby didn't know but it wouldn't be for the worse if Nick could be with his lovers without having to restrain himself.

"We're going to talk about this later today." Sam interrupted Bobby's thoughts. "See what Nick wants to do."

Bobby nodded at that. In the end it was Nick's decision what to do with his life.

"I don't know about you." Bobby said. "But I'm not sure if I can picture him as a hunter. Don't get me wrong, he loves the research, that is obvious, and he's good at it, but I can't see him out there working a case."

Sam made a face, trying to picture it. "We'll work something out."

They returned to their respective work and for a while the only noises in the room came from Sam typing on his laptop.

In that silence the roar of an engine coming to life seemed even louder than usual.

"What the …?" Sam was at the window in a heartbeat and when Bobby joined him a second later they could only watch the tail of the Impala skittering around the corner.


	43. Chapter 43

_She's here, she's here she'shereshe'shere._

Nick couldn't recall how he'd made his way back the bookstore but then the bell jingled above his head and he stumbled into the slightly dimmish store. The bag with the sandwiches slipped out of his hand and he staggered a few steps farther into the room.

_She'shereshe'sheresshe'shereshe'shere._

"Nick?" Adela came around the counter. "You okay?"

"She's here, she's here." He muttered under his breath.

"Nick?" Adela reached for him but Nick swatted her hand away.

"Don't fucking touch me!" He stumbled backwards and tripped over the bag on the floor, landing hard on his ass.

"Don't touch me." It was a pathetic whimper and he crawled away from her until his back hit a shelf where he made himself as small as possible. Adela stood over him, a looming shadow. He knew this wasn't _her_ but all he could see was _her_ face, _her_ smile, holding a dark promise.

"I'm not touching you." Adela's voice was soft when she crouched next to him but kept her distance. Nick only shied farther away. On some level he knew this wasn't _her_ but she was a woman, hell she was another person, and she was too fucking close.

_She_ was out there. _She_ had found him, _she_ was coming for him.

"I'm calling Dean." Adela announced but her words didn't make sense. Just pointless babbling that was lost in the fog of panic Nick was in. However, she moved away from him and that was better.

Back pressed against the shelf behind him, knees drawn up to his chest with his arms slung tightly around them Nick rocked back and forth, not caring that he bumped his head hard into the wooden frame behind him every time.

"Dean's on his way."

The words slowly sank in his mind and Nick reached for them like they were the only thing keeping him from drowning.

Dean was on his way. Dean was on his way. But _she_ was already here. _She_ could come in here any second now. _She_ would find him and then _she_ would kiss him and then … and then …

He couldn't go through that again, he couldn't. He'd rather kill himself.

_She_ wasn't here yet so if he kept quiet, maybe _she_ wouldn't find him. Maybe Dean would find him first. Because Dean was coming, Adela had said so. Dean was coming. She wouldn't lie to him, would she? What if she was lying? What if she hadn't called Dean but _her_?

He didn't really know Adela. How could he know if he could trust her?

Nick tried to keep an eye on Adela who sat not far away on the floor without losing sight of the front door. _She_ could come in any second now.

"Dean is on his way." Adela repeated in a soft voice, barely audible over the blood rushing in Nick's ears. And his harsh gulps of air. And his rapidly beating heart.

"Nick." Adela tried to get his attention and for a second it worked. "You're save here. Nothing bad can come in this store. Nothing."

Nick felt dizzy and black spots were dancing in front of his eyes so he buried his face in the gap between his knees and just wished for this to be over. Rocking back and forth he lost himself in that motion. His sluggish mind altered between _Dean is coming_ and _She's here_ , slurring the two thoughts together into one loop that lost meaning with every turn.

"Nick, hey." A voice pierced through his panic and then there were hands on him. Nick screamed and tried to crawl away but there was nowhere to go.

"Shh, it's okay, it's me. It's okay. I'm here."

The words were familiar. He'd heard them before. They had been his beacon during … during ...

Dean? He wanted to call his name but he couldn't get enough air in his lungs to make a sound. But Dean seemed to hear him nevertheless.

"Yeah, it's me. I'm here."

When his arms closed around him Nick didn't shy away. Instead he leaned farther into them, into Dean, and his tight muscles relaxed a little bit.

Now Dean was rocking him like he was a child, one hand pressing Nick's head into his chest while his other one stroke Nick's back in soothing circles.

They stayed like that for what felt like forever.

"Better?" Dean shifted so that Nick's head now rested in the crook of his elbow and stroke the hair out of Nick's face.

Nick managed a nod but had no intention to move otherwise. He was so tired.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Dean ask.

"She's here." Nick croaked out. His nose was clogged and his voice was hoarse and the words didn't sound like words at all.

"She's here?" Dean repeated without understanding. "Who's here?"

Dean looked around and his eyes fell on Adela hovering in the background.

"Adela, could you?" Dean jerked his head.

"Sure thing. Just holler if you need me." With that she retreated to the back room before Nick had even figured out what this was all about.

"Just you and me now." Dean stroke Nick's cheek. "Better?"

Nick shook his head. "Not her."

"Who than?"

"She." Nick licked his dry lips and the panic spiked again. "The succubus."

In an instant Dean switched from caring lover to alert hunter. Nick felt him tense up and his eyes darted around, searching for the threat.

"Where?"

Not asking if he was sure or if he was seeing things, Dean believed him without a doubt, without a second of hesitation.

"The sandwich place down the street." Nick pried himself out of Dean's arms and leaned against the shelf instead. "I went to buy lunch and there were so many people in there and they said those things …"

"What things?" Dean sat next to him, their bodies touching from hip to shoulder with their legs stretched out.

"Things gay bashers say." Nick let out a deep sigh. "But that's not all. Like this other guy they … they knew, Dean. They new about the three of us. About Sam." He dropped his voice because he had no idea if Adela was in earshot or not.

"Son of a bitch." Dean cussed and his eyes went in the direction of where Adela had went, too.

"And then I saw her, just for a second in the crowd. She winked at me." Nick's breath hitched again. "She's here. How can she be here?"

"Dunno." Dean rubbed his face. "But we'll figure this out. I promise."

A promise like this would be just a hollow phrase coming from anybody but Dean. But this was Dean promising to him that everything would be alright and Nick believed him.

"I want to go home." Nick let his head fall back and closed his eyes. He wanted to go home to his apartment, where Aiden was still alive and his biggest problem was if he should tell his boyfriends for a year his last name or not. Nick wanted to go home to his old life but now Bobby's place had to do.

"I know." Dean sighed, stood up and reached out for Nick to help him up. "After we've figured this out we'll find a solution for that, too."

Sensing that the worst was over, Adela came out of the back room, a small package in her hand.

"Everything okay?" She asked with a warm smile but Nick couldn't look her in the eye. He'd freaked out right in front of her. How pathetic was that? What was she thinking of him now?

"We're good." Dean answered for the both of them. "But keep an eye out, would you? Looks like there's a succubus on the loose in this town."

"A succubus?" She repeated with a hint of disbelieve in her tone, however, Nick could see the wheels turning in her head. She knew he had been through something bad, that he was interested in succubi, had a problem with touching and people close in general and he'd freaked out, muttering "She's here." just minutes ago. Adela didn't need to be a genius to connect the dots here.

"Oh." Was the only thing she said but her eyes were on Nick in warm sympathy. But then she shook that off and placed the small package in Nick's hands.

"Then this is probably even more helpful than I thought." She closed Nick's hands around the paper it was wrapped in, her hands on his. "Bloodwort tea. Helps to keep a clear head and it's good against anxiety. One tea-spoon per cup, let it steep for five minutes." She pointed with her finger at him. "And don't say men don't drink tea, you liked it earlier today."

"Yes, ma'am. Thank you." Nick breathed a little easier.

"And this is your pay for the day." She laid a wad of bills on top.

Now Nick shifted uncomfortably. "That's it with the offer, I guess."

"Bullshit." Adela had nothing of that. "We're not done with the collection. I await your ass here tomorrow morning nine o'clock. If you still want to help me out, that is." She softened her tone at the end, a questioning eye on Nick.

"Can I?" He didn't care that he sounded like a five-yea-old.

"What offer?" Dean interrupted.

"A job offer." Adela shrugged as if that was obvious. "I need somebody around the store and Nick here would be perfect. If he doesn't take off with you, he seemed a bit unsure about that part."

Now Dean squirmed under her raised eyebrow. "We haven't talked about that yet but it depends on what Nick wants."

Nick sneaked his hand in Dean's and squeezed it. Dean squeezed back.

"Then for once you should open your damn mouth, Dean Winchester, and talk." She rolled her eyes before she turned to Nick. "The offer stands. If you stay in Sioux Falls, you have a job."

Dean looked at her in awe and his mumbled "Thank you." sounded rough around the edges. Nick wasn't able to form words at all.

"Enough of that. Get him home, fix him a tea and cuddle him to death." Adela ordered. "And I want that on camera because I need evidence to believe in Dean Winchester cuddling. However, I would have said that about holding hands in public as well." She added with a nod at their joined hands. Nick expected Dean to draw back as if he'd burned himself but Dean only hold tighter on to him.

"Wouldn't count this public." Dean answered smoothly.

On the drive back to the salvage yard they stayed silent with Nick looking out of the window without really seeing the buildings passing by.

"You know." Dean broke the silence when they were almost at Bobby's. "We'd love to have you on the road with us, we do, you know that, but you have to figure out what you want. Life on the road isn't the right thing for everybody." He paused, not pushing in a direction, leaving it open for Nick to decide. "Looks like you've already found a job here. We could continue like before."

Nick turned to him. "What would you prefer?"

Dean thought about that for a moment and his smirk got more lascivious with every second.

"Hmm, having you and Sam in my bed every night for kinky sex sessions for hours on end or awesome phone sex instead. Nobody gives head over the phone as mind-blowing as you do. That's a tough call." He nodded his head, considering and with some dirty thoughts running through his mind, no doubt.

"You're unbelievable." Nick slapped his shoulder. Out of the corner of his eye he saw something moving. "Watch out!"

"Son of a bitch!" Dean floored the brake pedal while Nick braced himself for the impact.


	44. Chapter 44

This was too good. Ishtar giggled like a little girl when she saw little fuck toy Nicky enter the sandwich place.

She'd only dropped in to catch a quick lunch and to check if her pets were doing what they were supposed to do. She couldn't flood the bookstore with people but she could make sure that her pets spent their lunch breaks at places around the store and went shopping in that area. And if one of them happened to come across the Winchester brothers or their little toy, well they knew what to do.

She had one pet behind the counter and two in the crowd filling the place and she had a first row seat for the show. Fuck toy tried to play it cool. He nearly lost it when her pet behind the counter tried to kick him out but he got help from two women who stuck up for him.

_Oh, somebody is about to cry,_ she clapped her hand over her mouth to prevent herself from bursting out in laughter. Nicky boy stood there, waiting for his food while the two pets hidden in the crowd kept insulting him. Oh, and they were good. Nothing too obvious, most of it even innocent out of context as it was, but for sure Nicky got the meaning.

When he took the bag with a trembling hand and a stoic face, she couldn't resist. It was childish and probably stupid but she had to do it. His gaze flickered over the crowd, searching for the source of the insults but finding only people minding their own business.

Ishtar shifted. His gaze swept over her and Nick almost fainted when he saw a familiar face. She winked at him and he ran.

It had been a stupid move, she knew that, letting the hunters know that she was in town but it had been worth it. Still snickering she made her way back to the car.

The hunt was on now, it was only a matter of time until they'd find her. But didn't they say that attack is the best means of defense?

On her way back to the Haydens Dean passed her dashing in the opposite direction without taking notice of her. But why should he? She looked different now. They had no idea what she looked like at the moment and that gave her time to plan her next step. She had quite some man power under her command, now she only needed to decide how to use it.

"Where have you been?" Tim had the door open and was kissing her on the mouth before she had the keys out.

"Out." Why she even bothered with an answer she had no idea. "Get off me."

She forced her way past him but he grabbed her hand and dragged her farther into the house.

"Ishtar." He whined. "I missed you. I need you." To emphasize the last part he placed her hand in his crotch over his tented pants.

"I don't have time for this." She got her hand free and stepped away from him but of course he was on her a second later. He lifted her hair and started kissing the now exposed skin of her neck.

"Need you." He mumbled between kisses, rubbing his boner at her hip.

"Seriously?" She rolled her eyes. "Others have managed to function for two or even three weeks longer than you before they lost control. You are a pathetic wimp, you know that?"

"Yes." He mouthed his way up and down her neck with his hands fisting her hair. "Please, I'm begging you. I need you, please."

"I must have lost my mind." She shook her head in disbelieve but kissed him on the mouth. Her tongue explored the hot wetness while she pumped him up with a fresh dose of her venom.

"There are hunters next door who now know that I'm around and they will do everything they can to find and kill me and I should figure out how to deal with them but no, you are distracting me."

"Let me distract you." His hands roamed over her body, cupping her breasts, thumps brushing over her hardening nipples. "Please, need you."

Tim was beyond the point of being of any use to her, just a needy mess that needed a good fuck and more of her venom or it would become a needy mess in withdrawal.

"I think I should feed before I deal with Dean Winchester and the others." She trailed her finger over his breastbone down over his navel until she reached the hard outline of his erection in his pants. "Get naked."

The second he started fumbling with the buttons of his shirt Ishtar heard hasty footsteps on the stairs and then a door shut with force.

_Little Jerry has been spying again,_ she thought with a smile. So far he'd made a run for it whenever Ishtar and Tim went past the kissing part but Ishtar couldn't care less if he was watching while she fucked his dad or not. As long as he stayed out of her way she was fine with whatever he was doing.

However, she should deal with him before this went down.

But Daddy first.

By the time her mind was back on track, Tim stood in the middle of the living room with nothing on but a horny grin and was stroking his cock with a loose fist.

"This is probably our last chance."

He pouted at that but didn't say anything. He just kept stroking himself with lazy movements.

"I'm not sure if you're going to survive me feeding on you, you are a wimp after all." Ishtar continued. "So let's make this something special."

"Please. Need you." Not in the slightest bothered by the probably dying part Tim nodded eagerly.

She wanted to feast before she dealt with the hunters so she thought about how to do this. They'd done it on the couch and bent over the kitchen table and the carpet was too rough to repeat that one occasion. Her eyes fell on his pants and more specific on the belt.

"Get your belt while I find something to stuff your ass with, would you?" She hadn't finished the sentence and he was already on his knees, working the belt out of the loops.

Ishtar sauntered over to the kitchen, fully aware of Tim undressing and fucking her with his eyes and she made a show of swinging her hips.

"Let's see, what do we have?" She searched through the fridge and the cabinets, looking for something big enough for him to actually feel.

"This will do." She grabbed a wine bottle and went back over to him, where he still knelt on the floor with his cock hard and leaking between his legs, working it with one hand while he stretched out the other one with the belt to her.

"Hands off."

Reluctantly he let go of his cock and placed his hand on the floor to balance himself. He hissed in surprise when she pressed the cool bottle between his legs. She lifted his balls with the bottom of the bottle and rolled them on the edge before she dragged the glass up his shaft to the head. By now he panted heavily and his hips jerked into the touch.

"You like this?" She stroke him with the bottle.

"Yes, I like it. Please, I need more. Please." He humped the bottle shamelessly now.

"In a minute." Ishtar set the bottle aside and smirked at the whiny noise coming from him at the loss. She kissed him again and he opened his mouth for her, drinking in more of her venom.

"First the belt." She slung it around his neck and pulled it tight. His eyes budged and he gasped for air but more out of surprise than anything else. "Don't worry, I won't suffocate you."

With her claw she made a hole in the leather way tighter than a belt usually went and buckled it tight around his throat. He could still breathe but with some difficulty now.

He panted in short little gasps, face already red and his body covered with a thin layer of sweat.

"This will make it more intense." She trailed along his cock with her fingertips. "Not that it is really necessary with my venom kicking your libido into hyper-drive. But it's more fun this way."

She laid him out on the couch table and reached for the wine bottle.

"And now for this little friend." She spit on the neck of the bottle. "Let's see how much you can take."

He tried to scream when the slim neck of the bottle breached the ring of muscles but he didn't have enough air left for more than a hoarse gasp.

"Bet Nicky boy could take the whole bottle." She fucked him with the neck. "But this will do."

She left the bottle as deep as it would go into his unprepared and inexperienced hole and stepped back to admire her work. Feet planted on the floor and hands grabbing the legs of the table he lay there on display, with the belt around his neck and the bottle sticking out between his cheeks. His cock lay heavy on his belly, fat and leaking.

"What a sight to see." She took her time to undress while he panted something that sounded like "please" over and over again.

"I'm going to ride you until you scream." She promised and swung a leg over him. Slowly she sank down on him and his head fell back with a silent _ohh_ on his lips. "C'mon little pony, we're going for a ride."

She rode him hard with the bottle hitting his prostate merciless each time she rammed it into him. She made him come like this three times in a row with him coming dry the last time, nearly unconscious from the lack of air and the loss of energy.

"That was a fun ride." Finally done with him she stood up and went naked to the bathroom upstairs to clean herself up. Satisfied and well fed for the moment she felt strong enough to take on ten hunters.

"You should go over to Singer's and deal with Dean Winchester once and for all." She told her reflection in the mirror and giggled. "I'm high."

A noise snapped her out of her happy feeling. The nosy kid was still around here somewhere.

"Damn kid." She muttered under her breath but it came out louder than intended. "That's something I should deal with once and for all. Rip him to shreds, kill that little rat nice and slow." She smiled at her reflection.

She stepped out of the bathroom and stood in front of his door. "Jerry? You in there? I've something to tell you." She waited a moment but Jerry didn't open the door. "I'm done with your father, I'll leave soon."

There were noises in the room but the door didn't open. It was locked but that hold her back for only a second. However, that second was long enough for Jerry to climb out of the window. She caught a glimpse of his leg before it disappeared and by the time she was at the window he was half-way down the front yard. Still butt naked she couldn't follow him but he had nowhere to run to anyway. She had everybody under her control he could turn to so she wasn't that worried.

Jerry looked over his shoulder and their eyes met but she wasn't sure what to read in them, fear or triumph, it wasn't clear to make out. What was clear to make out was the big black car coming down the street, though.

Still looking at her Jerry kept running and Ishtar grinned at what was about to happen. The car was close now and Jerry still hadn't seen it as he ran blindly on the street. Breaks screamed and Ishtar waited for the sweet sound of the impact which never came.

The car skittered to a halt just inches from little Jerry and then Dean and Nick were out of the car. Ishtar was too far a way to hear what they were saying but Jerry gesticulated wildly and he had his damn camcorder in hand. Cussing Ishtar stepped back before she got spotted when Dean scanned the house with the eyes of a hunter. With Nick and Jerry in tow and two experienced hunters just around the corner Dean didn't risk anything, though. He ushered his fuck toy and the nosy boy in his car and then they drove off.

Ishtar tried to recall what Jerry had filmed but she had to admit that she hadn't paid attention. It was enough to sick the hunters on her, that much was for sure.

Ishtar hurried to get dressed and urged Tim to do the same. As long as he was alive he could help her.

"They have Jerry." She told Tim and there was still enough of a father in him that he wanted to rush over immediately but Ishtar hold him back.

"We're only two." She reminded him and didn't point out that he could barely stand upright without doubling over.

"They have my son." Tim made an unsteady step towards the door. "We have to get him back."

"We will." She promised and took her phone out. "But we need backup."

She grabbed her phone and sent out a message to all her little pets.

_The fags kidnapped a little boy. We have to stop them. Meet me at Singer's._


	45. Chapter 45

Nick knew they would hit the kid.

However, Dean did the impossible and brought the car to a halt barely inches from the kid who tumbled backwards and tripped over his own feet. When he went down Nick was sure they'd hit him anyway, somehow rolled him over with the stopped car. The engine was still running, though.

"Kid?" Dean was out of the car and around the hood in a heartbeat. "Are you okay? Kid?"

Nick followed him slower, daring what he might find.

The kid sat on his ass, comical huge eyes fixed on the headlight of the car in front of him.

"I'm …" He clutched what looked like a camcorder closer to his chest. "I'm fine. Nothing happened." He came to life and reached out his free hand for Dean to help him up but he didn't actually look at Dean. Instead he threw a fearful glance over his shoulder at the house he'd been coming from.

"What were you thinking?" Dean scolded. "Running on the street like that? You want to get killed?"

"Quite the opposite." He muttered and pried his eyes from the house to have a look at Dean and then Nick. "You are the ones staying at Singer's."

Something like relief spread over the boy's face and he went over to the back door of the car, the one not facing the house.

"What do you think you're doing?" Dean asked when the kid opened the door with the clear intent to park his ass in the back seat.

"I'm coming with you." The _Duh!_ wasn't said but it was there.

"I am not just snatching a kid from the street." Dean threw his hands up but was at a loss what to do. The kid had already one leg in the car and the only way to stop him would be to physically hold him back.

_Which probably isn't the best idea_ , Nick thought. Two men, a running car with the back door open. Nobody would believe them that they were trying to get the screaming and kicking kid _out_ of the car. And he looked like he would kick and scream.

"Could we get outa here before she comes out to kill me?" The kid asked and it didn't sound like a joke. The fearful look he had for the house didn't look like a joke.

"Who wants to kill you?" Dean switched from annoyed to alert in a second and had a look at the house himself. Nick didn't notice anything out of the ordinary but he had no idea what he was looking for anyway.

"My dad's girlfriend." The boy said it as if it was something dirty and Nick bit back a laugh. At that age probably every new woman in his dad's life had Evil Queen qualities. Nick opened his mouth to say something to downplay the situation but the kid cut him off and hold his camcorder up.

"I have proof." The grim expression made him older than he was. "Believe me, you want to see this."

Cutting off the discussion he slipped in the back seat and closed the door. Nick and Dean shared a helpless look and then got in the car as well.

"Okay, what do I want to see?" Dean turned in his seat, facing the kid.

"At Singer's." The boy promised, clutching the camcorder as if his life was depending on it. "She never goes there."

Reluctantly Dean got the car moving and they drove the last bit to the salvage yard. The kid visibly relaxed as soon as they drove through the gate.

With the almost accident and the persisting kid in the back seat Nick had forgotten why Dean had picked him up early in the first place. So for a moment he had no idea why Sam came running for him the moment Dean parked the car in front of the house. Right, panic attack and succubus in town, how could he have forgotten that?

However, Sam stopped dead when the back door opened and the kid stepped out. Sam's expression switched from worried to confused and he opened his mouth a few times to speak before actual words came out.

"Who's that?" He finally asked.

"That's the Hayden's boy." Bobby came up behind Sam. "Everything alright with your dad, Jerry?"

Now the tough mask crumbled and the boy was close to tears when he shook his head.

"No, sir."

A minute later they were all in the kitchen, Jerry with a cup of hot chocolate in front of him and the camcorder lying on the table.

"Okay Jerry." To Nick's surprise it was Dean who spoke softly to the kid. "Can you tell us what happened?"

"From one day to the other she was just there." He started, fingers absently playing with the wrist strap of the camcorder. "And Dad changed."

To Nick this still sounded like the old story, some kids took it hard when a parent moved on and found a new partner.

"Changed?" Dean asked, taking the kid seriously. "How? Don't worry if it sounds weird just tell us."

"He has only eyes for her." Jerry started, eyes fixed on the camcorder. "They kiss a lot and spent hours in the bedroom."

Okay, that clearly sounded like a new love and the last thing Nick wanted to see was evidence of that. Had the kid really filmed his dad having sex? He hoped not.

"Did she do something to you?" Dean asked farther. "Did she hurt you?"

"No." He shook his head. "She said she just needed a place to stay for a few weeks and that I should stay out of her way." He took a shaky breath. "But now she's done and she wants to get rid of me."

"Done? With what?"

Sam and Bobby let Dean deal with the kid and to Nick's surprise Jerry responded to him.

"I don't know." He flicked the screen of the camcorder open. "But it has something to do with you."

Jerry fumbled with the controls until he had found the part he was looking for. All of them stuck their heads together to watch the video.

A dark ally with a woman and a man kissing.

"That's not your dad." Bobby observed.

"No." Jerry shook his head. "That's one of her other _boyfriends_." He turned the volume to maximum but for a moment there were only background noises. Then the woman spoke to the man.

" _You heard about those three men staying with that old drunk at that Salvage Yard outside of town? Fags, all three of them. Two are even brothers, rumor says. And they're doing it all day long, all three of them together. Somebody should do something about that, don't you think?"_

Stunned silence lay over the table while the video kept playing. The man left and another one took his place. Jerry stopped the video when the whisper started again.

"Uh." Sam made with the desperate attempt of a laugh. "Dean and I? Somebody has a wild imagination."

"Dude." Jerry rolled his eyes at him. "The whole town knows that you're fucking your brother."

Nick didn't know what shocked him more, those words coming out of the kid's mouth or the meaning behind them. Nick didn't care if the whole town knew, it was Bobby who couldn't know.

"That bitch is using every angle she can think of, lying out of her ass, to agitate those men." Dean didn't even care that a kid was among them, only trying to assure Bobby that he hadn't an incest relationship with his brother on top of the kinky relationship he had with a male hooker.

"Stop it!" Bobby bellowed, cutting Sam off who was about to say something. Nick sunk deeper in his chair and desperately wished to be somewhere else.

"You two." Bobby pointed with his finger first at Sam and then at Dean. "Can it. I know."

"You … what?" All color left Dean's face and Sam made a strangled noise. Nick was really glad they all were sitting because his legs wouldn't hold him right now.

"I know." Bobby repeated and adjusted his cap with a sigh. "You, all three of you, weren't exactly discreet lately."

"And …" Dean swallowed thickly, not daring to ask the question.

"You're okay with that?" Sam finally brought the words out.

"We have some things to talk about." Bobby admitted. "But I haven't kicked you out, haven't I?"

Nick couldn't believe what he heard. His own father had kicked him out simply because he had no interest in women and Bobby here? Without batting an eye he'd accepted not only that Dean liked men, no he had accepted his boyfriend right with that. Sam. Even the spanking. Bobby didn't really understand it but he had accepted that as a part of their relationship.

But this? How could he be okay with this? Nick saw the same doubtful expression on the Winchesters' faces.

"Let's talk about that later." Bobby suggested with a side glance at the kid sitting in their middle. At least Jerry looked like he had fun. "And focus on the important stuff for now. Like the succubus living next door."

"What's a succubus?" Jerry asked no one in particular.

"A creature that feeds off men." Bobby explained, leaving out the juicy part. Despite the words the kid was using Nick wasn't sure if Jerry even knew what sex was.

"And they can manipulate them." Nick added. "It's similar to hypnosis."

Jerry nodded at that information without any sign of surprise. "That explains a lot."

The woman on tape didn't look like the one haunting Nick's dreams, and who he had seen in the sandwich place earlier, but Nick had read enough about succubi to know that they changed their appearance due to the man they wanted to feed off.

"Okay." Dean cleared his throat, visibly shaking the unpleasant thoughts off, only focused on the problem at hand for now. "She is dosing men up and gives them orders. This explains the explosion of gay bashers in this town lately. And how they know …" He stopped with a not so hidden glance at Bobby. "How they know what they know."

"Do you know how many she has under her control?" Nick tapped the camcorder with his finger. "How many she has kissed?"

"I'm not sure. Many." Jerry bit his bottom lip. "Try every man in town."

"Crap." Sam and Dean said in unison and Nick closed his eyes. She had a fucking army out there. In her case quite literally.

"Okay." Dean stood up, ready for action. "Nick, Jerry, you two stay here. Don't let anybody in."

He took his gun out, the one Nick had practiced with an eternity ago.

"Just in case." Dean reassured him and Nick closed his hands around the handle. "It's loaded with silver so it can kill that bitch."

"Ishtar." Jerry spoke up. "That bitch's name is Ishtar."

"Okay. Try to kill Ishtar and not one of us." Dean ended his instructions and went with Sam and Bobby for the door.

"Where are you going?" Jerry asked now with a hint of fear in his voice and Nick couldn't deny the uneasy feeling in his stomach either. The weapon lay heavy in his hand and the last thing he wanted right now was for Sam and Dean to leave. The first sparks of panic clawed their way through his chest again.

"We are going to kill that bitch." Dean promised. "And we're getting your dad back, Jerry."

With that they left and Nick and Jerry stood alone in the kitchen with no idea of what to do now. Nick watched Dean through the window who got more weapons out of the car and then the three men walked down the driveway.

"You think they can kill her?" There was doubt clearly in Jerry's voice but at least he didn't seemed bothered by the gun and the fact that his neighbor was out to kill his dad's girlfriend.

"Of course, it's their job." Nick answered and hoped it wasn't a lie.


	46. Chapter 46

Bobby had thought about how to let them know that he knew and if it was only to end the forced separation of Sam from the other two. Bobby still was biased about this, nothing could change the fact that they were brothers, but he was willing to give it a chance. They wouldn't stop on his demand so it was either living with it or losing them and he couldn't risk the latter. He couldn't.

He knew how John would have reacted to a revelation like this, it wasn't that hard to imagine, but it did hurt to see Sam and Dean expecting the same from him.

When Jerry accidentally brought it out in the open with that little video of his it hurt to see how afraid they were, Sam and Dean more than Nick, but it was written on all three faces. For some reason it was the worst to see it on Dean's face. That boy rarely showed his emotions but right now the fear was there, already mixed with the acceptance of Bobby's rejection. Dean couldn't even imagine any other reaction from Bobby and his face was a steel mask while he was bracing himself for the harsh words and the accusation and the maybe literal kick-out.

Sam and Dean both tried to discuss it away but neither of them was very convincing. And they had other problems right then.

"Stop it!" Bobby raised his voice and they snapped their mouths shut. "Can it. I know."

There, he'd said it. For a second the only sound in the room was coming from Sam who sounded like he was choking on something.

"You … what?" Clearly confused Dean stared at him and Bobby had to point out to him that he needed to check his definition of discreet.

"And …" Dean started but was at a loss, probably wondering why he was still sitting at Bobby's kitchen table with that secret out in the open.

They had things to talk about, Bobby knew that, but this wasn't the right time and he wouldn't do that in front of the kid anyway. So he reminded them that they had other problems at hand and left it that way for the moment. But he made a point of pointing out that he knew for a while now and hadn't kicked them out. His eyes were on Dean to make sure the boy got what he was saying.

With that out of the way the plan of action was clear. The succubus was next door so they would go over and give her a neighborly visit. And hopefully rescuing Jerry's dad along the way. She had been feeding off him for a while now so even if they got him out alive, he still had the withdrawal ahead of him. Poor sucker.

"Nick saw her earlier." Dean said while he dove into the arsenal in the trunk to get another gun and silver bullets. "She knows we're looking for her so whatever she's up to, she's doing it now."

"Any idea what she's up to?" Sam asked, standing guard while his brother was busy. "Succubi usually are the coward type. They run rather than fight."

"Let's kill her before we find out." Dean suggested and closed the trunk. Falling in step all three men made their way down the driveway.

They didn't come far. The driveway was closed off with cars and quite a number of men were waiting for them.

"There they are!" Someone had spotted them and now all eyes were on them. The men didn't move but they looked in hate and disgust at the hunters. And they shouted insults at them. It was hard to make out single voices but Bobby heard "fag" and "homo" quite often, along with "incest" and "brothers" and some rather graphic insults about how they had sex.

"What now?" Dean asked but neither Bobby nor Sam had an answer to that. They couldn't just shoot the men, they were human after all and only puppets of the succubus controlling them.

Bobby was about to suggest to retread and regroup when he heard a female voice carrying over the yelling crowed.

"Dean Winchester!" A woman, Bobby didn't recognize her face but it was pretty clear who she was, climbed up on the hood of a car. She stayed crouched, mostly shielded by the surrounding men, but her head poked out of the crowed.

"Look at me!" She demanded and her face shifted. Smooth skin became scarred, one eye slipped out of line and her well-defined face was now a bumpy mask. "Dean Winchester, look at what you have done!"

"Not enough!" Dean yelled back and raised his gun but before he could shoot her she had ducked back behind her wall of men.

"Show yourself, bitch." Dean demanded but she wasn't stupid enough to do that. Instead the men started with the insults again and slowly, step by step, came closer to the hunters. Bobby made out familiar faces among the crowd, people he called friends who now stared at him in disgust and with open hate at Sam and Dean. There were police officers among them, too, so even if one of the neighbors called the police it wasn't likely that they would rush in to help. Not that there was much they could do to help anyway.

"Back to the house." Bobby decided and they took off in a jog, never leaving the crowd out of their sight. The men were slowly closing in on them but didn't seem to be in a hurry.

Nick who had been waiting at the kitchen window opened the door for them.

"That was quick." He let them in with Jerry ducking behind him. "Is it over?"

"Can't say that." Bobby locked the door. "We should barricade the house."

Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Dean opening his mouth.

"One Romero joke and I shoot you myself." Bobby promised and Dean closed his mouth without saying anything.

"What's going on?" Nick asked with the gun in one hand and his other arm slung around the boy at his side.

"It's Zombieville outside." Dean explained and motioned for his brother to help him with a cabinet.

"Don't think that's going to hold them off for long." Sam examined the now blocked door. "The basement?"

"We would be trapped down there." Bobby dismissed the idea and wondered how long it would take for her to come up with the idea of burning down the house.

"We can always shoot our way out." Dean suggested but didn't seem to be convinced. "Make a dash for the car."

That would mean shooting at people, maybe running them over with the car.

"Let's keep that as a last resort." Bobby ran over to the kitchen to see if he could barricade the window somehow. His place had way too many windows, he decided.

The men had formed what looked like a loose circle around the house, which looked dramatic but it also meant that there were only a few of them near by if they tried to break through.

"Dean Winchester!" She yelled but stayed out of sight. "I want you. Singer and you fuck buddies didn't really hurt me and I feel generous today, if you come out, Dean, I'll let them go. They can all leave unharmed if you come out."

There was a pause while she waited for an answer.

"What do you think? One noble sacrifice to save your friends." She continued. "Remember the good old times? We're going to have so much fun before I kill you."

"I remember the part when I plunged a knife in your face." Dean yelled back. "We can continue there if you want."

"You know that she won't just let us go, right boy?" Bobby felt the need to remind Dean of that fact before the boy could do something stupid.

"Of course I know that." Dean retorted but Bobby knew they had to come up with an idea quickly or Dean would go out there to distract her so that the others had a chance to escape. Bobby saw the same realization on Sam's face and the way Sam set his jaw there would be an argument before he would let his brother do something stupid.

"Okay, any ideas?" Dean asked looking from Bobby to Sam and back again but Bobby had no idea. Shoot her with a silver bullet, that was the only way to kill her but they had to go through her army first. To Bobby's surprise it was Nick who spoke up.

"She has them under control with her whisper, right?" Nick asked, already heading for the study.

"Yeah?" Bobby and the rest of them followed him. For the moment she seemed satisfied with having them trapped and the men didn't close in farther and Bobby didn't have enough stuff at hand to barricade the complete house anyway.

"There was … a spell or whatever you want to call it." Nick had found what he was looking for, the book he'd bought at Adela's on his first visit there, _Mystical Creatures Associated With Fertility And Sexuality._ He flipped through the pages.

"Here." He laid the open book on the desk. "There is a way to break the whisper."

"I've heard about this." Skimming the page Bobby nodded to himself. "This could work, good job."

But then his eye caught something. "Dammit. I have everything in stock except for bloodwort. And we need her blood for this."

For a second Bobby had his hopes up but there was no way they could complete the spell. The succubus was right outside but even if they could somehow get her blood with the last ingredient missing it would be of no use.

But Nick surprised him once again.

"There is bloodwort tea in the car. Think that would work?" Not waiting for an answer he fumbled with the bent buckle of his bracelet. "And here's her blood." He slammed it on the desk.

Bobby picked up the bracelet and had a closer look. He knew that it had been Dean's anniversary gift and that the silver buckle had helped Nick to escape the succubus in the first place but Nick had always been protective about it and Bobby hadn't pried on it.

The protective symbols were quite obvious so Bobby knew what it was about. What he didn't know was that there were three names burned into the leather on the inside. _Sam Nick Dean_.

"Oh, that …" Sam started, rubbing the back of his head, but seemed to be at a loss how to proceed. Dean and Nick just looked uncomfortable.

Bobby felt a little bit stupid that he hadn't thought of the possibility that it hadn't only been Dean's and Nick's anniversary but Sam's as well. They had all three been in this from the start. What had Nick said? Sam had been Dean's boyfriend first?

Putting those thoughts aside for the moment Bobby had a closer look a the dark areas around the buckle where the leather had been soaked with blood. It wasn't perfect but when as it ever?

"This should do." Bobby decided and had another look at the description of the spell. "Let's put this together and then find a way to get that tea out of the car without getting ripped apart."

Bobby sent the boys through the house to gather what they needed while he and Jerry set a bowl and candles on the floor. It was a shame to ruin the bracelet, it was obvious what it meant to Nick and how much thought Sam and Dean had put in this gift, but they needed the blood so Bobby cut that piece out.

Bobby gave the now fully ruined bracelet back to Nick how pocketed it with a sad smile. Then they were ready except for the last ingredient.

"Dean!" The succubus yelled once again. "Last chance!"


	47. Chapter 47

Ishtar had fun. Some of her pets needed a while to come to the salvage yard but they were all coming. She had called and they came.

Hunters had qualms about killing humans so her plan was pretty simple. She waited until they were all there, every little pet of hers, and then she would just sic them on the hunters. They would never know what hit them.

Giggling like a little girl Ishtar went from one man to the next, reinforcing her mark with a kiss and some whispered words. So far her orders had been simple, observe and report, insult them at sight and things like that. To actually kill somebody it needed a little more encouragement but freshly dosed up with her venom the men would do almost everything for her.

"Ishtar, please." Tim never left her side, stealing a kiss now and then and being annoying. He would happily fuck her right here on the street in front of half the town if she gave him the chance. With the kisses he got enough of her venom to keep him more or less functional but he was an addict now and he needed a real fix soon or he would start humping her here on the street.

If this went down smoothly she probably would fuck him one last time, that one would kill him for sure, but now she didn't have time for him.

"They took Jerry, remember?" She tried to distract him and so far the worry about that brat had done the trick. At least for a few minutes at a time.

"Yeah, right." Tim mumbled and kissed her again. "We have to save him. But after that, can we? Please?" He was still walking funny and the belt had left a slowly fading mark around his neck but he needed more. If he became uncontrollable before this was over she might had to kill him. Or make one of her pets his bitch to ride it out.

_That sounds like fun,_ a smile played on her lips. _I wonder where CSG is._

She had made him call in sick for the day to ride out his own withdrawal but he hadn't nearly been as drugged and addicted as Timmy was after weeks of her influence on him.

"There they are!" Somebody in the front yelled and then it went like a wave through the crowd. Everybody who laid eyes on the men started to insult them. From her place Ishtar couldn't even tell who was coming up to them but her money was on the hunters, the famous incest Winchester brothers and that Singer guy. Dean would keep his precious little fuck toy in the back, probably babysitting Jerry. She should have killed that brat a long time ago, consequences be damned.

Ishtar sneaked a peek between two of her followers and spotted the brothers and Singer, just like she'd thought. They were armed with guns, loaded with silver bullets no doubt.

"Dean Winchester!" She shook off the iron grip Tim had at her arm and climbed on the hood of the next car. She wasn't stupid enough to stand up and make herself an easy target but she wanted, needed, Dean to realize what he had done to her.

So for the very first time she showed her face in public. Showed the scars and the deformation, the mark Dean Winchester had left on her. Nobody left a mark on her. They wore her mark not the other way around.

"Dean Winchester, look at what you have done!" She presented herself on full display and if he had been a bit quicker he would have shot her. She hurried to get off the hood and dove into the safety of the crowd surrounding her.

"Show yourself, you bitch!" Dean yelled but he was a dog without teeth.

Ishtar whispered the command to close in and slowly they forced the three men back to the house. Others were already in the salvage yard, cutting off every other escape route.

"You are mine." Ishtar smiled and followed the moving wall of her pets. It didn't take long and they had formed a silent circle around the house. They just stood there and waited for her command to attack while she noticed hectic movements inside the house. It looked like they tried to barricade the door and the windows but they gave up before even one window was secured.

"Dean Winchester!" She yelled but made sure to stay away from the windows. She didn't want to give them a clear line of fire.

She made her offer, him in exchange for his friends' lives, however, Ishtar had no intention of keeping her end of the deal and he probably knew that, if not he was just stupid, but it was fun to set such an ultimatum.

As expected his comeback wasn't that nice but she gave him some time to think about it. They wouldn't go anywhere any time soon.

"Ishtar, please." Tim shamelessly rubbed his hard-on against her and his hand slipped under her blouse. "Just a quickie. I need it, please."

"Not now." She shoved him away but like a stupid dog he crawled right back to her. However, she better got this into motion before he could distract her too much and something stupid happened.

"Dean!" Just for the fun of it she gave him a last chance to surrender.

Ishtar had never thought that Dean would actually come out. That he really thought she would let his friend and fuck buddies just leave.

_It's a trick_ , she guessed and used more of her pets to shield her while her word got around to be careful, Dean maybe thought he could shoot her before her little pets could overpower him.

"I am here." He turned around with his arms slightly raised to indicate that he wasn't armed. He couldn't see her so he randomly picked a direction and walked towards the ring of men.

"You said we would have some fun." Dean stopped only a few feet from her men but didn't make any attempt to break through the circle. He just stood there, waiting.

"You and you." Ishtar picked two of her bulkier pets, a biker and a police officer. "Search him for weapons."

Dean even lifted his arms to help with the procedure.

"No weapons." The biker informed her.

"Both of you, secure his arms and bring him to me." She ordered. This wasn't right, it had to be a trick of some sort but hell if she knew what he was up to. Or maybe he really was this stupid.

"You have me, let my friends go." Dean demanded with a cold glare at her when they finally stood face to face. He didn't fight the two men holding him, though.

"Let's seal this deal with a kiss." She suggested and stepped closer.

"You let my friends go first." Now Dean started to struggle but against the two men he stood no chance. "You bitch!"

He turned his head, the only way of resistance he had left, but one jerk with her head and Biker Boy grabbed his chin and forced Dean to face her.

She kissed him, worming her way into his mouth, and his resistance melted away. After a second he kissed back, now fighting the men to get closer to her.

"See?" She smiled at him and stroke his cheek. "Much better, isn't it?"

"Yes." He licked his lips. His pupils were blown wide and the bulge in his jeans was quite obvious by now. Oh yeah, she would have some fun with him before she'd kill him. And if she remembered correctly, he had quite some stamina and would last a few rounds before she had sucked the last bit of energy out of him.

"I can't wait to get you naked." She trailed her finger down his breastbone which made him shiver.

"Me too."

"But this time I keep you tied up." She promised. No way was she risking a repetition of their last encounter. "Would you like that?"

"Yes." He grinned happily at her and leaned in for another kiss. Dosed up like this he was no longer a threat and she gestured for the men holding him to release his arms.

"Why did you come out of the house?" She asked and caught his bottom lip between her teeth for a moment. Oh, she would play with this mouth for hours. Thinking of what he could do with those lips and that talented tongue of his, her legs went weak.

"To distract you." He answered carefree and stepped closer. He smelled good and close as he was she felt the warmth of his body seeping out of him, surrounding her like a blanket. His hands were on her now, roaming all the right places.

"Distract me from what?" She would love to roll in the sheets with him but first she had to take care of his little friends.

"From Sam getting the tea out of the car." He mumbled into her neck, leaving hot kisses all over her.

"What tea?" That didn't make sense. She had expected them to try to escape or to attack her while she was busy with Dean but tea?

All of a sudden there was a greenish flash of light and a sound like thunder coming from the house.

"The last ingredient for the spell to break your whisper, bitch." Dean's fist connected with her jaw and she went down. Dizzy but not out she crawled away from him.

"Where am I?"

"What am I doing here?"

All around her the men came to, confused and disoriented with no memory of how or why they got here. Ishtar staggered to her feet, threw the nearest man at Dean and ran. She heard shouting coming from the house and she didn't have to look back to know that the hunters were behind her and that they had guns loaded with silver bullets.

She ran around the corner of the house, hoping to lose them in the maze of old car wrecks, but then the back door opened and she nearly ran into little fuck toy Nicky.

"Stop!" He yelled and the big gun in his hands shook dangerously. Trembling like that he would most likely shoot one of the men stumbling confused around but Ishtar didn't want to risk that.

She only had a few seconds before the hunters would be all over her and her best chance was to just run for it. Chances were pretty good Nicky here couldn't hit the broad side of a barn if his life depended on it but he had hurt her. He had burned her with silver and he had sliced her throat and above all that he had managed to escape her and she just couldn't have that.

"What are you going to do?" She taunted him. "Shoot me?"

"Don't come closer." He warned her when she made a step in his direction.

"Or what?" She snapped her claws open. "I don't think you have it in you to just shoot somebody." Another step and the gun in his hands shook more than ever.

Behind her she heard the hunters closing in and it was just for the men stumbling around that they hadn't shot her yet but it was only a matter of seconds.

Run or fight. Two options and everything in her screamed for her to run. Not this time. For the first time in her life she didn't run, she didn't hide. This time she attacked. With open claws she jumped at Nick.


	48. Chapter 48

Nick didn't like the plan. Nobody liked the plan. Dean liked it the least even if he was the one who'd come up with the plan in the first place, but nobody had any better ideas so they stuck with the plan.

The spell was ready and they just needed to add the last ingredient, the bloodwort tea which currently lay in the backseat of the Impala which sat right out in the open between the house and the circle of men.

They could only hope that bitch of a succubus didn't kill Dean on the spot when he surrendered to her, unarmed and without backup.

"I don't like the plan." Nick said once again while Dean stripped off his hidden weapons. Where did he put those anyway?

"Me neither, kiddo." Dean said with a smile but set his jaw. Nick should feel offended by the _kiddo_ and remind him that a _kiddo_ wouldn't suck Dean's brains out through his dick but Nick kept his mouth shut. They were the professionals here and he barely deserved the term amateur so maybe _kiddo_ wasn't that bad of a word choice.

While Nick's mind ran in useless circles, Dean and Sam got in position. As soon as all eyes were on Dean, Sam had to sneak out and get to the car. At least he carried his gun but that didn't help Nick to feel better.

So Dean went outside, playing bait, and in this moment Nick knew that, however this would end, he couldn't go on the road with them. Knowing they did things like this on a daily basis was one thing but watching Dean out there, walking over to the men who were only waiting for the command to kill him, letting himself getting captured, Nick couldn't do that.

He didn't want to watch but he couldn't look away either. Dean didn't seem to be bothered in the slightest when two bulky men stepped out of the crowd and searched him for weapons and he even walked willingly with them behind the circle and out of sight.

Nick could only guess what was happening out there and he didn't like it. He didn't like it one bit. By now she had either kissed or killed Dean and Nick had no way of knowing. There was no scream or any sign of a struggle so that was probably a good sign.

Out of the corner of his eye he noticed some movement at the car and turned his head just in time to catch a glimpse of Sam who was already on his way back to the house. At least that part of the plan went well.

"Can you see my daddy out there?" Jerry asked from behind but Nick had no idea what his dad looked like. A small hand sneaked its way into Nick's and he gave it a little squeeze. Neither of them let go, both needing the support.

"There are too many, I can't tell." Nick shook his head and stepped back from the window. He didn't want to watch anymore. He didn't want to accidentally catch a glimpse of Dean's dead body on the ground. Dean could already be dead. Nick swallowed thickly and tried to force the image of Dean, ripped open by claws, laying on the ground in his own blood, back into the depths of his mind.

"We'll find him when the spell is completed." Nick promised but wasn't sure if he was talking about Jerry's dad or Dean. "He'll be fine."

Nick had no idea if he believed it himself. Yes, the idea had been his in the first place and on paper it had looked so easy but what exactly where they doing here? Dean was risking his life, or was already dead, for a bag of fucking tea they needed for a spell to break a succubus' whisper. This was insane.

Nick had accepted the existence of succubi, after what he'd been through it would take a huge amount of denial to not believe, but magic? Putting some random ingredients together and hoping for the best sounded rather medieval to him. However, the Winchesters and Bobby believed in this. Dean was betting his life on this to work.

Nick's fingers found the ruined bracelet in his pocket and he could only hope that it hadn't been ruined for nothing.

"You think this will work?" Jerry asked, still holding Nick's hand, while they watched Sam who added the tea to the mixture in the bowl. The candles were lit and Bobby chanted something in Latin and then Sam threw a match in the bowl with herbs.

"No idea." Nick answered honestly and didn't expect more than a flame and a lot of smoke coming from the bowl. Instead a green flame shot up, licking at the ceiling for a moment before it died down.

Then greenish light washed over them followed by rolling thunder that swept them off their feet. Nick hit the floor hard enough to knock the wind out of him with something poking him in the back and for long seconds he just lay there on is back gasping for air without getting any into his lungs.

"Are you okay?" Jerry crawled over to him and Nick didn't know how to answer that one. He didn't feel okay but he couldn't pinpoint what didn't feel okay and he didn't have the breath to answer that question anyway. So he just blinked sluggishly.

"You two, stay here." Sam shouted from the other end of the room. He did spare a concerned glance in Nick's direction but seemed satisfied enough with what he saw to not waste another second.

With Bobby on his heels Sam ran outside, leaving Nick and Jerry in the deceptive safety of the house. The men shouldn't be a threat anymore, at least in theory, but if the succubus managed to get a few back under her control, maybe even Dean …

Nick didn't want to think about that and just stayed on the floor for a moment longer. He couldn't have followed them outside anyway even if he had wanted to. Getting up seemed like an impossible task at the moment.

With a groan he rolled off whatever he was lying on, a book, it turned out, and slowly came up to a sitting position. His head was spinning and for sure his back would be covered in bruises in the morning but as far as he could tell, nothing was broken.

Jerry helped him to his feet and bracing himself on the window sill Nick had a quick look outside. The men had given up on the circle and were now wandering around with confused expressions on their faces. For a second Dean came in view with the succubus was at his feet, crawling away from him with fear in her eyes. Too bad Dean didn't have a weapon on him. But he had his fists and he looked more than ready to use them.

"Get that bitch!" Nick yelled but doubted Dean could hear him. Then the succubus was on her feet and she ran. She randomly threw people in Dean's path, gaining some yards on him, and Sam and Bobby were even farther away.

Nick was pretty sure that Dean would catch up with her eventually but he didn't want to give her the slightest chance to escape if he could prevent it. Grabbing his gun Nick ran for the back door.

His lungs burned with every breath he took and his running was more of a stumble than anything else and by the time he reached the back door he was convinced he was too late and the bitch was already gone. Or Dean had already caught up with her.

Turned out neither was true.

When Nick opened the door it was right on time. She came running around the corner, looking back, maybe at Dean who probably was hot on her tail.

However, she didn't notice Nick before she nearly ran into him. When she did notice him she looked like she just wanted to run past him, completely ignoring the gun in his hands. Then she stopped and changed direction. Now she was coming right for him, a murderous look on her face.

"Stop!" Nick yelled and to his surprise she actually stopped, still not in the slightest bothered by the gun pointed at her chest. Or at least he hoped that was what he was aiming for because his hands trembled and he was kind of surprised that the gun hadn't gone off on its own by now. He had the safety off and all he needed to do was to pull the trigger. At this distance chances were good to hit her somewhere even with his shaking hands, to wound her enough to slow her down so that Dean or one of the other hunters could kill her. But he didn't pull the trigger.

For a second she just stared at him with hate in her eyes and he expected her to run when Dean's voice came closer. But instead of running she took a step in his direction.

"What are you going to do?" She taunted him and came even closer. "Shoot me?"

He should do exactly that the rational part of his brain told him but his finger still refused to move.

"Don't come closer." He warned and was painfully aware of Jerry standing not far behind him. Could he shoot her in front of the kid? Could he should her at all?

She seemed to be sure he couldn't and she told him so.

Nick remembered what she had done to him, personal and through her venom, he knew she had done the same to Dean and countless other men. Aiden.

He had the chance to end this, once and for all, he just had to move is finger, just a little bit. His hands shook uncontrolled but she was so close now that the muzzle of the gun was maybe a feet away from her chest, it was impossible to miss at this distance.

For a long moment everything seemed frozen. He couldn't shoot her, he just couldn't. And she knew it, he saw it in her eyes.

Then Dean came running around the corner and time jumped forward.

The succubus snapped her claws open and with a snarl she lunched herself at Nick.

A shot rung in Nick's ears before she punched the gun out of his hand but he wasn't sure if he had fired or somebody else.

Nick screamed in surprise when she hit him. The force behind the impact sent him backwards and together they went down. She landed on top of him and fresh pain shot through Nick's lungs. He couldn't breathe, everything became blurry.

Somewhere behind him Jerry screamed and Dean was cursing but Nick's world was filled with the claws just inches from his nose. He caught her wrists before she could slice his face open but she was strong and Nick was about to lose this battle.

_I'm going to die,_ Nick thought when she broke his hold with a triumphant grin.


	49. Chapter 49

Nick fought a losing battle against the succubus. She broke his hold on her wrists, a wild grin on her lips, and he barely managed to keep her razor-like claws away from his face. She was just about to slice his face open when a shot bellowed over the noises of the struggle and the screaming and Nick's heart pounding in his chest.

A second shot followed and then another one. The succubus' face above Nick turned into an ugly thing, all scars and green glowing eyes.

She screamed, now struggling to get away from him. One more shot and she went silent. Lifeless she collapsed on top of him, her hair covering his face and her weight squeezing the last air out of his abused lungs. Warm blood seeped through his clothes but Nick just lay there for a moment and couldn't believe he was still alive.

"Nick!" Dean's panicked voice was right next to him, his gun clattered to the ground and he was at Nick's side in a heartbeat. "Oh, god. Nick."

Dean rolled the dead thing off Nick before he searched frantically for the source of the blood.

"Nick!" Sam yelled somewhere behind them and then he was at his side, too. "How bad is it? Nick, talk to me."

"I'm okay." He finally managed to get air into his lungs and words out. "Not my blood."

They didn't believe him until they saw the smooth skin of his chest and belly with no scratch on it.

"You scared us." Sam had him in a tight hug and kissed his cheek. Nick felt the wetness of Sam's tears on his face and only now he realized how bad it must have looked. How close it had been.

"Don't do that ever again." Dean hugged him from the other side, his face buried in the crook of Nick's neck.

After he had made sure that Nick really was okay, Dean went over to check on Jerry. The kid was shaken but as far as Nick could tell unharmed.

They parked Nick and Jerry on the couch, where they sat holding on to each other, and at least Nick's mind drifted in a pleasant fog of nothingness for the moment. He didn't want to think at all for a while and just kept the kid in his arms while the others around them took care of whatever needed to be taken care off.

Dean and Bobby carried the dead succubus outside while Sam talked to the few remaining men. Most of them had wandered off on their own by then but a few had stayed, demanding an explanation now. Nick had no idea what Sam told them but he spoke to them for long minutes and from time to time Nick understood a few words when one of them raised his voice. But in the end they all left, their voices trailing off until there was only silence.

"You think my dad is somewhere outside?" Jerry asked but didn't let go of Nick.

"Sam is looking for him." Was all Nick could say to that. Right on cue Sam came in with another man behind him.

"Daddy!" Jerry flung himself in his dad's arms.

"Jerry." The man had tears in his eyes and Nick wondered what Sam had told him, about the succubus, about the venom. She had fed off him for weeks now, Nick didn't want to think about what the next day or two looked like for him. And he had nobody who could help him through this.

Dean and Bobby came back in and Nick didn't ask what they had done with the body. She wouldn't come back and that was enough for him. It was over. It would take a while until he could fully believe it but it was over. She was dead.

They left father and son on the couch, one with a healthy shot of Jack and the other one with a hot chocolate.

"He is poisoned?" Dean asked and nipped at his own glass. They sat in the kitchen and after what had happened today they all needed a stiff drink. Nick rolled his glass between his hands, thinking.

"Pretty bad, if you ask me." Sam answered.

"He knows?"

"Yeah." Sam downed his drink.

"We can bring him to a hospital." Dean suggested, eyes fixed on the amber liquid in his glass. "They can at least drug him to take the edge off."

"He doesn't want a hospital." Sam said and reached for the bottle. "They can't really help him and he doesn't want to get marked as some kind of junkie. Doesn't want to risk losing his son over this."

"So we tie him up and make sure he doesn't hurt himself?" Bobby asked and didn't seem happy with that solution.

"That's all we can do." Dean emptied his glass in a quick motion. "Sam and I are going to take him home and have an eye on him. Jerry should stay here until it's over."

Nick hadn't said a word so far. He remembered all too well what it had been like even with Dean's help and he could only imagine how bad it must have been for Dean who had endured that on his own in an abandoned house. And now Jerry's father was about to go through this as well.

"I can help him." Nick said without looking up.

"You … what?" Dean asked in a tone that made clear he had understood exactly what Nick was suggestion, what he was offering, but couldn't believe it.

"I want to help him." Nick clarified and now he looked up. All three men were staring at him but he hadn't expected less. Dean had instantly offered to help him out but they were boyfriends after all. With Mr. Hayden it was something completely different.

"Nick, it's okay, you don't have to do that." Sam grabbed his hand and kissed his knuckles. "You don't have to prove anything. I know it sucks for him but this is not the way."

Apparently Bobby took a moment longer to get what Nick was offering or he was just too stunned to say something right away.

"You're offering to have sex with a complete stranger?" Bobby finally found his words.

"How do you think I met Sam and Dean?" Now Nick raised an amused eyebrow at him. "What did you order the first time you picked me up?" He turned his head to look at Dean. "The whole menu, the whole night?"

"And I had to pay for the room and threesomes cost extra." Dean's face lit up at that memory. "Best money I've ever spent."

Bobby mumbled something about too much information and suddenly he was very interested in his empty glass.

"Nick, you're still recovering from your own experience with her." Sam reminded him. He threw a half-hidden glance at Bobby but then continued with a shrug. "You can't stand being naked around us and you haven't let one of us near your ass since then."

Now Bobby made really funny noises but nobody was paying him much attention anyway. Of course Sam had to be the reasonable one.

"I can do this." Nick emphasized every word. "I want to do this." He paused for a moment, choosing his words carefully. "I think this is going to be easier for me because he is a stranger. With him it's nothing personal. If I fuck things up with him it won't matter, I won't see him ever again. Please, I want to help him."

It had never been a question as long as it had been his job. It was the job, nothing else. Now he wanted their okay, needed to know that they understood that this was not about having sex but about helping somebody who needed help.

Sam and Dean looked at each other.

"Okay." They said in unison.

"But we stay close and if something goes wrong we stop it." Dean added. Bobby looked like he wanted to say something but shut his mouth without saying a word. He gave Nick a look he couldn't quite place.

"I'll take care of Jerry in the meantime." Bobby finally agreed and with that it was settled.

Nick finished his drink and then went over to the study where father and son still waited for things to happen. By now Mr. Hayden fought to keep it together in front of his son but it was quite obvious that he was losing that battle. Nick crouched in front of him.

"Mr. Hayden?" He looked him in the eye and found only lust there. "Tim? My name is Nick, I'm going to help you."

"Help me?" Tim frowned at him. "Sam said nobody can help me."

"I can make it easier."

However, Tim still looked confused, hadn't really understood what Nick was talking about. But Nick didn't want to explain this in front of Jerry anyway.

"We should go over to your place." Nick stood up and nodded for Tim to follow him outside.

"Oh? Oh!" Tim finally made in understanding. "I can't … we can't … we shouldn't ... I don't even know you." It sounded more like a token objection and contrary to his words, Tim's hand had found its way to Nick's hip. Nick returned the gesture and put a first chaste kiss on Tim's neck. Heat radiated off him in waves and the smell of sex lay already heavy in the air.

"She had me once, too." Nick answered and that was enough of an explanation. Tim nodded and drew him closer. Their hips were touching now while they walked in silence over to the Impala.

_Just a job,_ Nick thought and took a deep breath. His ribs ached and that was only the first bruise, there was more to come, he was sure of that.

Sam and Dean joined them, Sam with a bag over his shoulder with the things they'd need. Mainly lube and condoms, Nick guessed. There wouldn't be much need for clothes in the near future.

"I've never done it with another man." Tim said with a forced laugh when Dean parked the car in front of his house. They got out walked the few steps up to the door with Sam and Dean right behind them.

For Nick that made it easier, knowing his boyfriends close by just in case, but for Tim it was another reason to be wary about the whole idea.

By the time they reached the front door Tim was beyond caring and tried to eat Nick alive. He was muttering about Ishtar under his breath but he was desperate to take any sex he could get at this point.

Sam and Dean stayed downstairs while Tim led Nick to his bedroom and they even took the time to change the sheets because doing this in the bed Tim had been in with the succubus? No, that was where Nick drew the line.

Sam and Dean helped Nick with manhandling Tim to the shower two or three times over the next two days and they helped with the final clean-up. For the rest it was only Nick and Tim.

At first Nick wasn't sure if he could even get naked around Tim and he was close to calling this off but in the end he was right. It was easier with a stranger. Just another customer who needed it a little more rough.

Tim didn't expect anything. Tim didn't actually care who he was fucking. There was just need.

Nick on the other hand didn't really care about Tim either and so he didn't care if this was good or right and what it all meant for them in the long term. There was only Tim's need induced by the venom and as soon as that kicked in for real, Nick was busy with other things than thinking.

When it was over Sam helped him tucking Tim in and then they called Jerry over and left his dad in his care.


	50. Chapter 50

When it was over Nick collapsed in the back seat of the Impala and was sound asleep by the time they reached Bobby's house.

How he'd managed to get upstairs he had no idea and then he just stood in the middle of the bathroom and let Sam help him out of his clothes while Dean started a bath. Nick winced in pain with every movement, he was bruised and sore and so fucking tired, but then he sank into the hot water and sighed in relief.

Sam and Dean bathed him, hot water and caring hands, and Nick nodded off in the bathtub but Sam's strong hand hold his head safe and sure so he didn't have to worry about drowning.

Then they spread him out on the double bed in the guest room and taking their sweet time giving him a massage from head to toe, working every kink and knot out of him until he was a puddle of happy goo under their skilled fingers.

He fell asleep with their warm bodies pressed against his and in the late morning the next day he woke up in the same position. All three of them with limbs thrown over each other, curled together like cats in a basket, and Nick didn't want it any other way.

It took him a minute to realize that they were still at Bobby's and that this was the first time all three of them had slept in the same bed.

Despite the fact that it had been Nick who had done all the work Sam and Dean slept soundly and didn't even stir when Nick wiggled his way out of the bed. He had his shower and got dressed and when they weren't showing any signs of waking up soon, Nick went downstairs in search for a coffee. Sure enough Bobby had heard him in the bathroom and had his coffee ready. Just like always, just like nothing had changed.

"Morning." Nick made his way through the kitchen and sat down carefully, searching for a position that didn't hurt too badly. He didn't feel as bad as after his own withdrawal but he was stiff and sore and still felt like he could sleep for a week.

Bobby sat a plate in front of him, overloaded with eggs, bacon and toast. Nick's stomach grumbled loudly, he couldn't even recall when he had last eaten.

"More like afternoon." Bobby grumbled in his beard but it didn't sound unkind. "How do you feel?"

Nick considered that question for a moment.

"Good." He answered and it was the truth. He was sore but the bath and the massage the other day had helped.

"Sam stayed with us over night." Nick said and had a watchful eye on Bobby. He was still not sure how the older hunter really felt about his adopted sons having a relationship like this.

"Yeah, he did." Bobby took a sip of his coffee.

"How do you feel about that?" Nick just had to ask.

Now Bobby smiled fondly. "I kicked his ass back up to you two when he came downstairs to sleep on the couch."

"Oh." Nick tried to picture that. "I'd have loved to see his face."

"Believe me." Bobby grinned at him. "I wished I had my camera at hand."

"So you are okay with us? All of us?"

Bobby let out a sigh. "I can't say I understand it and it would be easier to accept if Sam and Dean weren't brothers but I want to see them happy. And if this makes them happy …" Helplessly he waved in the general direction of the guest room. Then he frowned at Nick. "Are you happy with this?"

"Yes, I am."

"Good." Bobby nodded into his coffee.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while, Bobby nursing his coffee and Nick digging into his breakfast.

Eventually Sam and Dean found their way to the kitchen as well. Dean greeted Nick with a good morning kiss without really thinking about it before he went for his coffee but Sam hesitated with an unsure glance in Bobby's direction before he set his jaw and placed an almost chaste kiss at the corner of Nick's mouth. Having nothing of that, Nick hold him back and showed him how it was done right. When they parted Bobby was very busy with his paper and Dean was watching them with a smug grin.

They had their coffee and after they'd made sure that Nick was fine, no lasting damage physically or emotional, Sam and Dean became more serious.

"We should hit the road." Dean finally said. "Stay away from Sioux Falls until things have settled down. Sam found us a hunt. In Wisconsin."

There was a beat of silence.

"I'm not coming with you." Nick let out a sigh but he knew it was the right decision. He'd love to be with them 24/7 but he couldn't live the life they lived.

Sam and Dean nodded without saying anything for a long minute.

"Dean said Adela offered you a job." Sam spoke. "You wanna take it?"

"Shit, Adela." Nick had forgotten about her. "I left her hanging, dammit."

"Don't sweat it, boy." Bobby assured him. "She called when you didn't show up and I explained it to her. Not the details, of course." He added the last words in a haste when he noticed Nick's horrified expression. "And she told me to remind you that the offer still stands. If you want it, that is."

"Yeah, I think I want it."

With that decision made the rest was easy. Sam and Dean would leave the next day while Nick stayed with Bobby who would help him to find a place for himself. They would continue like before with visits whenever they could squeeze them in, Bobby insisted on visits from them as well every time they were in town, and a lot of phone calls.

The day went by with Nick dozing on the couch and Sam near by on the computer.

Dean was busy packing and getting the car ready for the road, or so he said, and Bobby had something to take care off in town so it was a lazy day. Which was exactly what Nick needed. To his own surprise he felt good, content. Just a few days ago the thought of Sam and Dean leaving would have caused a panic attack but now he was glad that life went on. He was wary about the future but they had promised to call him every evening and threatened to sing him a lullaby if necessary.

When Bobby came back later that day he stood for a moment in the door to the study, watching Sam and Nick and fiddling with a small package in his hand wrapped up in brown paper.

"Got this for you." Bobby said to Nick and placed the package in his hand. Then he stepped back with a nervous smile. "Figured it's important to you so …" He gestured for Nick to open it.

Nick threw a glance at Sam who was as clueless as he was.

"Open it." Bobby urged and Nick ripped it open. Inside was a small box and inside that Nick found his bracelet.

"What …?" Carefully he took it out and had a closer look. It had been damaged before but when Bobby had cut a piece out of it Nick had thought it was ruined for good.

Now the ends were nicely cut like they were meant to be this way and the buckle was gone. Instead it had little holes with a leather string crisscrossing through them.

"The protective symbols are intact so it should still work." Bobby explained. "I replaced every other rivet with a silver one so you still have iron and silver, hope that was okay."

Instead of an answer Nick caught him in a bear hug.

"Thanks, Bobby." Over the older man's shoulder Nick caught Sam's eye who stared at them in awe. This was more than just about a stupid bracelet, Nick got that.

They went to bed early this evening because Nick was still tired and the brothers wanted an early start in the morning, however, as soon as the door closed behind them, Nick slung his arms around Dean's neck and caught him in a passionate kiss.

"Thought you were tired." Was Sam's comment when he stepped close behind Nick and slipped his hands under Nick's shirt.

"I am." He insisted. "And I'm still stiff and sore. I could use another one of those massages." He tried his best to imitate Sam's puppy dog eyes.

"You are a greedy little bastard." Dean kissed his neck and Sam helped him out of his shirt.

"And I want a happy ending." Nick added, working Dean's fly open. "And then, when I'm all tired and relaxed, I want you to fuck me sweet and slow. First you." He kissed Dean again. "And then you, I know you like a sloppy second." He craned his neck to kiss Sam as well.

"Jeez." Dean made. "You're going to be the death of us."

"But you'll die happy." Nick stepped out of his pants and then lay down naked in the middle of the bed.

They took care of his back first, each of them taking one side, working in unison. They worked the knots out of his back, massaged his arms down to his fingers and legs to the toes and took some time kneading the globes of his ass with a finger _accidentally_ slipping in the crack of his ass, brushing his hole, from time to time. Then they rolled him over and did the same to his front, leaving his cock for last. Nick purred under their hands, all tension melting out of him, and when those warm and oily hands finally found his cock, working him slow and sensual, he came in the doziest orgasm ever. Completely relaxed and almost asleep he was a rag doll in their hands and they had to lay his arms and legs out for him when they rolled him back to his belly.

The hands were on his ass again, kneading the already relaxed muscles and then the first finger slipped in his hole. They took their time with this as well, opening him up and getting him ready for Dean's cock. When Dean finally slipped in, there was no resistance at all. Dean lay heavy and warm on Nick, covering him like a blanket, and he moved inside Nick with deep but slow thrusts.

Murmured words in his ear and Dean buried deep inside him Nick let out a sigh. It didn't take Dean long to come, his cock pulsing and spurting in Nick's tight channel, marking him from the inside.

"Mine." Dean mumbled in Nick's ear and placed a kiss in that soft spot right behind his ear before he slipped out and rolled off.

For a moment Nick felt just cold and empty but then Sam was there, spooning his warm body to Nick's back and filling the emptiness inside him.

Sam rolled his hips in slow, almost lazy movements and by the time Sam came deep in him, Nick was half asleep. But he didn't miss the "Mine." Sam whispered in his ear.

Like the night before they laid him out on his back again and snuggled close from both sides, holding him warm and save in the middle. With some effort Nick sneaked his arms under their necks and drew them closer until their heads rested on his shoulders with their faces only inches apart over his heart.

Drifting off to sleep, Nick tightened his hold on them. "Mine."


End file.
